Library of Tiras the Notekeeper
This is where notes of the game recorded by Name Unk’nown AKA Tiras are stored.
2020 – A year of adventuring – 32 Chapters
Sunless Citadel – Stote, Ebon, Name – 2/1/20 – 5/2/20 – 3c
2020-02-01
We are in the cave – all enemies have been slain. We were searching for treasure. Ebonhond is carrying all of the stuff. He had explored the passage to the north, it kept going and going and was going down.
We decided to camp and let everyone recover. All went well.
When we awoke, we noticed light from the south. This seemed to be caused by lichen and some sort of film on the walls.
We went south and checked the first door. Stote pushed the door open and it made quite the squeal. We heard some goblins so Name stepped through the door.
The long room 60×20 had 2 rows of dragon-etched columns. There were many tables. Looked like there were alchemy supplies. A goblin burst into the room and Name stopped him with a word. (Ok, the word was stop, but what the hell).
We rolled initiative. The two goblins that had run into the room offered to take us to Belak to find out why they stopped trading fruit (The reason Name is here).
We followed them through the hall and out a door to the north. Through another small room and into a room (Cross Shaped) where nodules of luminescent fungus hung down from the ceilings and walls. The light illuminates portions of grand bas-relief walls where they were not covered in fungus. The dragons rained fire down on targets from above. The floor had light soil and compost that allowed small plants to grow. There was a bugbear tending the fungus and other growths. He is ladling stuff on fungus.
When the goblin asked if they should take us to Belak, the bugbear said, “No, kill them now!” – Battle!
We killed three goblins and the bugbear – With Ebonhond crushing the last goblin against the wall.
We kicked open the door in the west wall and entered a large octagonal room. Three goblins seemed to be gardening. They cowered efficiently and we left them alone.
Checking the North door revealed another gardening room and we immediately attacked the bugbear gardner who didn’t even last the round.
The door to the East revealed another octagonal gardening room but here the Twig Blight and Skeleton gardeners attacked immediately. They did not last long. Ebonhond opined that this seems like a lot of work for mushrooms… vegetarian shenanigans ensued. After much hubbub, we moved on.
The northern octagonal room had no one in it. When we went to the southwest door, we could hear breathing noises. We entered more carefully and after navigating a short hallway, we came to a room with a statue of a red dragon. The breathing had stopped but the statue’s eyes glowed with a red glare that illuminated the room. In front of the statue was a rhuuuuuune circle (Ok I know it’s rune but) … Stote moved into the room and tried the door to the north. As soon as it was opened, a shadowy form attacked us. We sent it to the grave and then Erky found a secret stash behind the statue in the wall. 34G – 2 Glowing/Glittery Red Vials – and then Billy was too cheap to give us a level… until next time.
2020-04-04
Ebonhond and Stote haggled about the key for the north door and Ebon acted hurt when Stote demanded it. He was just messing around though but Ebon messed right back giving him the wrong key. Ha-ha – Stote used sleight of hand to pick the lock and Ebon missed and so was amazed.
We entered the room to the north, which was a library. Erky was super excited and began digging through the piles of books immediately. He found two scrolls: Melf’s Acid Arrow, another one high-level and a Tome (Spell book). We departed that room to a landing above some stairs. It was collapsed a bit and went only 10′ to a steep set of dilapidated stairs that were too high for Erky to traverse without some climbing.
Name put Erky on his back and they descended the stairs. Asswind’s grace allowed her to traverse the stairs with some ease.
Name opined that perhaps the group should finish checking out the current level and we returned to the columned hall to check the rooms we had passed while the goblins were leading us. The first room (South East Corner) had a tunnel where it looked like someone (or something) had burrowed through from an adjoining area. Though small, the tunnel was navigable, so we proceeded.
The tunnel was devoid of the glowing lichen so we proceeded with some gaps so that Name’s torch did not mess with Stote‘s darkvision. We found a connection to the original room that Stote perceived, but we did not trust. After Name confirmed we did a slight split forced by the tunnel. Name went Southwest and Stot to the hall to the South. Name found a forking with …hmm notes too detailed. Tired of typing so much.
We went SE to the cavern and encountered a Firesnake (source of the glow) and attacked. We kicked its ass. Poking about we found two matching sapphires. We added these to our stuff.
Returning to the S corridor, we tried to open the stone door at the end of the hall and Ebon was able to pull it open. Revealed was a square room in which there was a large iron statue of a dragon with a tray in its mouth. The room was unusually quiet. The tray may have once been nice but was now, like the statue, was weathered by time. Anything that might have been on the tray has passed with age except one lone tooth.
As Name could not move the statue, he ran back to the firesnake, tore out its teeth, taking some small damage, and put them on the tray. Nothing happened.
Stote shot the statue with an arrow that ended up hitting Ebon. After fiddle farting around for a bit and prying the tray from the dragon statue’s mouth, we gave up.
We checked out the rest of the small rooms and found sleeping goblins, wine making goblins, and goblins who turned a rat into a fruit tree.
That was enough; we went for a short rest.
2020-05-02
We finished our rest and went back to the ‘built’ areas. After a quick check of another fungus room to the south, we moved back to the stairs at the north that went under one of the octagonal rooms.
A short hall led us to a turn where a long southern hall had two doors at the far end. We couldn’t open it, so we kicked the shit out of it for about 5 kicks and, just as the clever fighter of the group proved that they were really taking the right approach, regardless of what Ashwynde might think (or say) some goblins stumbled into the hall (probably for completely unrelated reasons) and attacked us for no reason at all. So we kicked their asses.
Then we split up to the rooms behind the doors. Name and Erky found a mushy library. Erky opened some freakin’ book and blew us up. He healed Name so Name only smacked him around a tiny bit. We gave Ashwynde some scrolls and a book we found and rejoined the party in a larger room that led off to the South.
Ebonhond, Stote and Ashwynde moved forward and had some difficulty with some pesky briars. When we tried to teach them a lesson, twig blights attacked and died. We continued moving into the room with Name occasionally teaching the cocky briars their manners. As we continued south, more of the living kindling tried to impress us and were turned to toothpicks.
We got to a large clearing where a big spooky tree was defended by more twig blights. Stote gave one of the TBs the sawdust treatment and the ‘head guy’, Belak, gave us some background info while trying to talk us into joining his little troupe of tree supplicants.
So, we attacked the tree. Stote shot first and the tree got a little pissed. Name could not reach it so he moved around making more splinters from twig blights. Ebon shot the tree as well and everyone started getting pissed. Ashwynde F’d the tree up with a moonbeam spell and all the little druish princesses really began whining.
Stote was mixing things up with a giant frog (where the hell did that come from?) but escaped. The battle raged with Entangles (Belak) and escapes (us) and finally Erky killed the tree with a firebolt spell. At that point, the supplicants fell still, but Stote was grappled again. Name attacked Belak and no matter how he tried, he could not hit him twice in the first round. Ash flipped her moonbeam over to the frog and Belak healed himself. Stote stabbed the frog and everyone wanted to go multiple times. Name killed Belak with a crit and did a jig. Kulket was still going and kickin Stote‘s ass. Kulket reduced Stote to 0 and he passed out. The whole party shifted focus to either keeping Stote alive or killing Kulket. Who thought a giant frog would be the real villain? Ebon killed the shit out of that there frog and we all ran through the healing spirit. Ebon went a bit nutty, grabbed Ash, and started bitchin’ at her. Erky commanded Ebon to let go of Ashwynde and shit himself, which left Name wondering about solo adventuring again.
We searched the area and the bodies. Got the stuff, saved the people, poked around the tree then made like geese and got the flock out of there. We returned to town where the folks we ‘rescued’ passed away. Nevertheless, we got our treasure even though the guy was really sad.
Then we leveled up.
Oakhurst and on the road to Waterdeep – 5/9/20 – 6/19/20 – 5c
2020-05-09
Now back in Oakhurst, Stote, Ebonhond, and Name split up their treasures. Name went to sell everything, leaving the other two in the tavern. A dwarven female (sans beard) came in and told E&S she knew them from a dream. When Name returned with the spoils of the sales, he worked his way around this newcomer and threw the others their share.
This new Dwarf seemed interested in either getting the party to join her (ok, maybe just Stote and Ebon) or seducing Ebonhond.
Either way, with the dwarf wench buying beers and telling tales about knowing all three of them, Name thought he could at least listen and drink her out of coin (once he confirmed that the first beers weren’t poison.
Just as things were getting interesting (the second beer was ordered), someone outside called for a cleric and the dwarf left. Guess we know what she might be. Name wandered out to keep an eye on his beer (er the dwarf) but she became involved in some ‘ceremony’ that looked like it might take a while. There goes the second round.
Stote and Name tried to wrangle the bartender for one on the cleric’s tab. That did not work, so Name bought the next round.
She finally came back and caught Ebon fondling her hammer. She grabbed between his legs to ‘show him how it was done’ and Ebon quickly corrected his position.
The drinking continued. Nadja (Dwarven women) read the journal of the dead woman and found that she worshiped Jauqim (god of trade) and worked for an apprentice of a powerful wizard. {Wakonga Otamu} who had charged her with traveling from Port Nazaru to Waterdeep to recover some scrolls and magical items. There was a shopping list of these items.
Name went to find the best of the brothel. Whatever that might be.
Ebon and Stote stayed in the bar and got to know Nadja better. A stranger showed up (a female stranger) and asked if the group was going to Waterdeep. Nadja indicated she was and basic plans were made to meet there in the future. Nadja did learn the woman’s name (Kestral) but, perhaps because of the drink, never set a place or time to meet.
Name returned because he had not set a time or place to meet. While things wrapped up a little quickly and agreements were made a little easily, Ebon decided to have some questions. Nadja smoothed those over by telling the party of her visions and with that, everyone settled off to bed with a final round and Name went to the brothel.
Ebon and Nadja arm-wrestled and Ebon got whooped. Nadja offered to ‘lay on hands’ but so subtly, that Stote had to spell it out to him.
Since there is no good brothel in Oakhurst, Name headed back to the bar and settled in for the night.
Long ago, someone named Halaster came to where Waterdeep was and kicked ass. Now there is some history…in the notes.
There were some significant hangovers but Name and Ebon were good 2 go.
So, morning came and off went the party to Waterdeep.
It was an early spring day. We met with Fossler to get the best conveyance possible. He had a large selection. Having arranged for a carriage and 6 horses, 120 arrows, extra blankets, 2 weeks rations for the horses and ourselves. Nester (bartender) got us a barrel of dwarven ale.
Name bought a fabulous hat at Melody’s Ware. She was a comely woman but the wife of some lucky guy so Name simply paid well for the hat and was on his way.
Day 1: Left late, traveled until dusk. Cress (Pat) advised that when we get to Waterdeep, we find Durnan at the Yawning Portal.
Got attacked by twigs and other assorted vegetables – did some weeding, if you know what I mean.
2020-05-16
Continued our travels through some pretty crappy weather and got to the edge of the wood. After making it out onto the plains, we finally saw a clear sky in the distance. We continued up a gradual slope until we got to an edge where we had to turn until the terrain would allow us to keep our carriage and horses with us.
As we progressed, there was some confusion over direction. Ebon thought our way might be wrong. While we were sorting it out, some knucklehead tried to navigate the slope. He tumbled ass over teakettle and we sped up to help/loot him (dependent on the outcome).
Name took a flagon of ale and meandered up the hill to the body. Ebon went along but, for some reason, took no ale.
The young man, looking all Native American, seemed alive but unconscious. Took half my ale to wake him up but then he just started caterwauling. He was pretty beat-up which could have explained the screaming, but – oh my god, could you please just suck it up.
Nadja arrived and, after figuring out Name did not do it (I hope), Nadja healed him. Since we could not loot the body, we figured that we might as well talk to him. He seemed to know Stote (which improved his chance of not getting looted) and so we talked to him for a bit.
Nadja had the good sense to look for loose change on the ground and noticed something up the hill. Changing roles very quickly, Ebon and Name went up the hill and retrieved what turned out to be a pouch. We took it back without searching it. (Well he seemed to know Stote and Ebon) and found the conversation in earnest.
The guy’s name was ‘Flagon‘ and Stote greeted him as he got closer to the wagon. Some confusion as Name thought something had happened to his drinking accoutrement but it really turned out to be the guy’s name.
Flagon said he had followed us out of town cuz he saw some suspicious characters following us. Name certainly felt better having’ Flagon’s mad wilderness skills along for the jaunt.
Flagon went to rest up in the carriage and we decided a final debate about directions was needed.
After we decided that we were headed correctly, we rode on into Port Llast. The well planned hat did not do much good as we came on the south side of town. Good luck though for the carriage deal. Whaelgund said he could fix the carriage and board the horses for 3 gold. So, we left things at Whaelgund’s Wheelrace. Stacey put the horses to stable. He pointed us to the Alliance Arms and off we went.
Ok, not instantly, had to wake Flagon up first. The Alliance Arms was an ok place. Busy, good food. Rustic but well situated.
We went in and Stote tried to position Flagoin to watch the door (kind like Marla’s doin’ right now for my weed eater buyer) but he still seemed too out of it to help. Nadja fixed him up with some herbal drink (ok, lesser restoration) and got to know him a bit and then Stote put him to work.
A few of the servers caught Name‘s eye but the best one had a ring. We had a great meal, and everything was going well so Name felt it was a good time for dessert. He went off to get with the waitress, Mary.
Meanwhile, some big dudes come walkin’ in. (Half-orc and two humans) Stote thought things were a bit amiss and headed out the door (a four-top of roughnecks seemed to notice him on the way by, but I can’t list that in the notes cuz I wasn’t really there). Flagon thought the guys were suspicious and pointed that out. Name had no idea regarding anything that was not in that wiatress’s cleavage.
Meanwhile, Nadja had been doing Detect Magic as a ritual. When it started, she saw a large dweomer of illusion throughout the establishment. It seemed to be tied mostly to the ambiance (lighting, smell, cleanliness?, general noise).
Meanwhile, Stote was watching for the one at the fourtop that may have noticed him and slipped in the back door. Paying hard silver to keep the cooks quiet, Stote slipped over to the door to the restaurant and peeked out. (God, that Ebon is a horrible actor)
Meanwhile Ebon did the drunken master investigation move and turns out, he may not be as bad as Stote thought. He ended up ordering some ales and joining the table. The half-orc (Axe) turned out to be a dick. The ‘maid’ brought back the 10 ales (in souvenir mugs no less) and they….
Meanwhile Name scored a room with a bath from Tailmund, some scented candles, two bottles of the Scarlet Rose, and a hot bath for the near future. Tailman called over Mary (and yes, it could have been awkward, but Name covered it well by asking for someone else as Mary was helping out down here).
Meanwhile Stote continued his investigation and keeping an eye on Ebon (Sorry I missed this detail…fighting with the cat)
Meanwhile Nadja continued to learn about the illusion on the room and how it may have been very expensive to add a spell of this caliber just to improve the ambiance. Good on ya. She made eye contact with Stote and started to meander towards the table where Ebon was.
Meanwhile, Flagon advised Stote that these might not be ‘the guys’. Stote warned Flagon that stupid shit was coming. Stote headed towards the table to join Ebon and called out to the group asking if they had been in Oakhurst. Axe looked at Ebon and made a comment on the elf. It quickly became apparent that the HO was a bit racist. Ebon waved Stote over and conversation ensued until finally, at the threat of things continuing at the Jack & Sabre, Axe snatched up his friend Dremin, their food, and the three left.
Name rejoined Ebon and grabbed one of the ales on the tables while Stote checked to see if the table outside joined them. Nadja got close enough to find out there was some magic on the three as they left but not enough to know just what kind. Stote observed the four outside seem to follow the three from inside and then….
Even though Stote offered to follow them, Name thought it would be better to wait until the party was not occupied in other activities (wink, wink). After a bit more chit chat about what those seven might have wanted or why they seemed so interested in Nadja, Name went to make sure Mary got well settled in her room.
Nadja went over (cannot really say over, maybe next to) the counter to get a room, a keg and and a bath (oops, sorry Nadja) so just a bed and a keg (and maybe a little sumpin sumpin form Tailman {guess we’ll find out if that’s apropos}). While giving her life story ‘June’ had a bit of a challenge with her back-story. But she scored the mini-keg and Tailman, impressed by the 3 gold ‘June’ gave him, had the local bard start playing bomp-chicka-bow-wow (Thinks are looking up for the sumpin-sumpin).
Stote went to get a room for all three of them but could not and ended up getting a room for him and Flagon (hmm) while Ebon set his sights on the roof.
2020-05-30
We woke up to “Help! Help!” – And stopped a thief from robbing Tailmen’s mom (Olrlis).
Nadja got robbed – just of the ring. Got a note. Somethin about “…better me than you”. Got the props, finished breakfast. Headed out. Tailman introduced us to Karn Silvermane captain of the Lonesome Trotter. Karn will be taking us south to Waterdeep as employees.
Karn invited us to a battle of the bards at the Jack and Saber.
Checked on the carriage, doing fine. Met some beggars, one’s a thief.
Lost the internet – lost all my notes.
Got directions to the ‘TG’. Went. Stote and Ebon went in and … (well, we know Steve will not remember). Nadja and Name killed time shooting the shit about the riots in Neverwinter and talking about the signet ring. Nadja recalled that it was magical and looked like a brain.
We kicked the knitter woman 7 Sp and asked her to tell Stote and Ebon that we went to the flea market. It was the typical fair with everything from vegetables to heirlooms. Nadja, cast detect magic and we went to check things out.
We found a ring with a Shield on it that was detected as magical and they were asking 250G for it. We did a little of the old shuffle bid and got it for Nadja for the low low price of $19.99. (Ok, 235G).
Ebon and Stote rejoined just after the ring was purchased and Nadja put it on and (after a couple seconds) it fit like a glove. Ok, well a ring, but still.
The TG had advised Ebon and Stote that, if they returned at dusk, more information on the ring thief may be available.
The whole group headed into town proper and got flowers (for Mary) and Candy (so Nadja can seduce Ebon).
We wandered down to the docks to take a look at the boats and see what the Lonesome Trotter looked like. Ebon was awestruck at both the birds and the boat but managed to overcome (oh no he ditent) the fear of the boat on the water. Nadja calmed him down even though he never really realized what the issue was.
We checked out the ‘Jack and Saber’ and it certainly seemed there was excitement and rancid odors in the air.
Ebon and Nadja stayed at the bar. Name and Stote headed towards town.
2020-06-12
Duh duh dah – Will there be a 6-13? – Billy finished up my summary – remember to save before he closes the game.
Name scored 120 for the carriage and horses and headed towards the ship.
Stote woke up and ‘trashed’ Ebonhond (literally). He wandered out onto the streets and saw folks gathering on the dock. Fishermen were going out to work. Men were already starting work on the Lonesome Trotter setting the rigging and getting her in good order. Our DM beautifully described the whole scene.
Stote met up with Name and they went back to the Jack and Sabre to wake up Ebon. Name got a bucket full of bay water and doused Ebon quickly, dropping the bucket and blaming Stote. Ebon came close to pounding someone but decided to just settle for awakening.
Just as we were about to get on the boat we realized Nadja was missing (still under the weather (er ah drummer?)) and … Meanwhile
Nadja awoke to the drummer was trying to sneak the fuck out (ok, guess she was under the drummer, not the weather). She tried to stop him with a minor hammer toss to the feet, but released high, hitting him in the head and knocking him senseless.
She threw him a cure wounds and he woke up wondering WTF. She talked him through it and headed for the dock with haste…meanwhile
We arrived at the gangplank and Karn invited us aboard. I was looking for gloves and Karn said that though the stores were closed Skivvy (a goblin mate) might find some on the ship. I walked over to Skivvy and sent him about finding some gloves…meanwhile
Nadja grabbed up her gear and went running through town to make the ship. Karn greeted her at the dock with a sour puss on his face, looking like he was waiting. She apologized for being late but it turned out Karn was waiting for someone else. He directed her to Scivvy to find a room. She made it on board just as Karn spotted Three Strings (the bard from the battle of the bards) who was a little late as bards often are.
Scivvy got back with the gloves and showed the party to their room.
We took a 40-minute break while Billy loaded his humongous vessel. Once we finally saw it, we were all suitably impressed.
We went down to stow our gear and implied what might happen if someone messed with it. We literally scared the shit out of Scivvy. Though he tried to keep it a secret, the shat was out of the bag. Ebon came down and managed to go right back up before anything else came that way (think about it). Stote came up and teased him as usual.
Nadja voiced her displeasure with the accommodations and their proximity to the bucket and ended up with a semi-private room. It seemed as though one of the beds might have already been occupied (dun-dun-duh). She stowed her simple gear, packed everything else up into the bag of holding, and headed upstairs. Three Strings was there but not very much ‘stuff’.
There were a couple other adventurers onboard as well. A ranger type with a nice beau and a knight type. Stote pointed out the missing cargo, and pondered what the point of the ship was.
The ship started making really good time. Probably because the sails were always full of wind regardless of the direction of the wind or the ship (or their relationship – get it?) The crew did not seem too busy but the captain manned the foredeck with an attentive spyglass.
Skivvy was up in the crow’s nest. Joe made a great comment on this, but I missed it, finishing off my cheese and beer and ordering stuff on Amazon.
Nadja went up onto the foredeck but found there was nothing but the captain’s junk to hold on to. Fighting down the urge to move forward she returned to the main deck.
Three stings was downstairs jammin’ to Chris Cross ‘Sailing’ and Jake got a job at an okay pizza place.
So, the good sound downstairs turned into good smells and so Name and the group headed downstairs to get some beer cheese burritos.
There was a lot of comradery amongst the group and they all seemed to be fawning over Three Stings. They seemed to be eyin’ Stote for takin’ too much but Name called out about the folks above deck and things went back to regular.
We noticed some Shitty Guards. Name realized they might be royal guards from Neverwinter. They came over to the cook and headed back up to the upper deck. Stote followed and watched them head towards the forward cabin. Stote alerted Nadja and Ebon to the basics and they speculated on the group. When Stote came to loop in Name, Name advised of his info.
Sorry – missed a bit of Skivvy and Stote. Jamming out to C, S, & N – SC.
The captain called up for Skivvy to get some chow and Stote said he could take the watch while Scivvy ate but Karn sent a kid up instead. Stote followed and the kid showed Stote how to look around for stuff by teaching him the horizon look. Just as he did this, a ship appeared off starboard and he picked up some speed.
Even though it seemed like we would easily outpace them, suddenly several beings appeared on the ship with a smell of ozone and some whooshing noises. We rolled initiative and then…
Nadja and Ebon got things started and combat was joined. Ebon started with a hit and Nadja blessed. They went, and then Stote flew down the rigging and joined the fray. Name would have missed but felt inspired to drive his greatsword into his opponent.
Ebon came back around and used his great axe to strike to extreme effect. Ebon heard a voice rejoice at striking a ‘giant’ even though it seemed like his opponent was a half orc.
They got their goes and Ebon got hit with a poisoned blade.
Things ran around the loop with Name making it into the light and scoring a hit on Dremen (from the bar as well) and doing some good damage. Back to the top of the order, Nadja hit but just not hard enough and then Ebon pulled a Dylan Thomas (Raged).
Name took a hit but managed to avoid the poison. And, things kept goin round. Axe (not the body spray) blew a skin flute and a Drow appeared. #blacklivesmatter
Stote must be a cop cuz he attacked the Drow anyway and his rakish audacity gave him sneak attack damage as well. Name killed Dremen and moved back into the darkness where he heard a scuffle on his Beyonce.
Been drinking…cannot keep up. Nadja did something and the axe rejoiced. Ebon attacked Axe with the axe and killeded him. A surge of healing coursed through him.
Our opponents continued to flail about pretty ineffectually although they did manage to scratch some surfaces. (That shit-le buff right out).
Sir super-guy upstairs tried to leap across the gap and Ebon, represented by his rules attorney, got an attack of opportunity that, while not killing him, killed the snot out of his concentration. But it did not kill him and so he used whatever he pulled off Axe’s body to teleport away.
We did a quick wrap up with Three Strings doin’ some healing and Karn handing out congratulations like the candy Nadja bought in Port Llast. He called out to Mattrim (Three Strings) to heal Ebon.
Name checked his corpses as Karn checked Ebon, and things got back to normal. Ebon asked Nadja about Axe and she thought he might be half goliath. He had a coin with a symbol of the Zhentarim. It radiated magic and Nadja was able to determine that it was magic (yay). She also found the axe to be magic but an arcana check revealed to her that it too was magic.
2020-06-19 – 69.254.113.4 – Bill IP
Now to divy up the goods. (Might be nice if occasionally we got some ‘greats’ but we’ll settle for goods).
Stote went forward to check on the status of the VIPs and they confirmed they were Taco Bell (Good2Go). During the discussion, he dropped his name and Mattrim (Three Strings) picked it up and ran with it.
In the course of sucking Stote‘s dick, Mattrim hinted at the chance that there might be work available at the Yawning Portal in Waterdeep.
He remembered Nadja from the Jack & Sabre as well and (was suitably impressed?) when she helped with the mending of the door.
Karn (that’s the captain, Joe) and Mattrim seemed to have some history (Not that kind) and they had a brief discussion.
Karn seemed impressed with our value and said as much and we set about clearing the decks. A quick disgusting comment caused Ebon to wretch and recover and also he and Stote managed to avoid going overboard. Stupid buttons. Name cleared the three bodies from below as well.
Karn was pleased at the speed he was able to maintain, seeing as how we made such quick work of our opponents, but not quite pleased enough to reveal the secrets of his sails.
Name got some healing from Three Strings and Ebon went to do a quick headcount to look for ‘odd’ crewmembers but Karn sent his bitch Skivvy to do that. (Yep, Skivvy’s the girl).
Ebon observed Skivvy as he did his check of the forward room and whilst Skivvy decided whether or not to eat this delicious booger. Since he seemed to have lost track not only of the # of band members but also what was going on around him, Ebon did a quick head count as well. He checked in with the band and confirmed that there were three backup band members and Mattrim…meanwhile
Stote headed up into the corw’s nest and the boy was still there scanning the horizon with a focus on the general direction of our previous opponents. Since there was nothing new to be learned Stote Errol Flynn’d it back down.
Some speculation arose about the Zhentarim and it was generally agreed that they were not to be fucked with (yet). {Black Market/Slave Trade Joke} They are very mafia/yakuza like. Xanathar is similar but more local to Waterdeep….
Meanwhile – Nadja learned some shit we did not get to hear about. Then she went down to check the status of her room. Instead of being satisfied with just her stuff, she went to check on the other person’s stuff as well. She got caught with her hand in the cookie jar (ok, not that) by Mary Poppins. A fine handsome woman, with no sign of Name anywhere. Esvele Rosznar introduced herself but asked Nadja to keep the secret. Nadja thought she might, as her recollection of the Rosznars was that they were looked upon somewhat poorly for their past dealings in the slave trade. #Blacklivesmatter
Rather than alert Esvele to her knowledge Nadja played dumb (not too hard to do) and asked if she was ok after the scuffle and, since nothing was amiss, left her to her sleep.
Name performed a rakish stroll around the ship and decided against trying the hat but checked out all the shippy things. Stote started to get antsy but then dinner came along and things calmed back down again.
Meanwhile – Nadja decided to play with her staff (who knew) – she found it was a???
Then it was suppertime, suppertime, sup-sup-suppertime. There was quite the smorgasbord with lots of seafood to be had. While many of those ‘regulars’ from the ship complained, the fare was good overall. Skivvy showed up and made a face but then came back for seconds. He took that to the front room ***metagaming alert*** probably for Esvele. The Shitty Guard came down, got their food, and went right back up while everyone made a big show of pretending they didn’t exist. Stote threw them an ask but they ignored him. The crowd looked on in horror.
After the meal, Name went above decks for some air and was there when the lookout spotted something and advised the captain to look to port. Karn began to turn the ship to starboard. As everyone got above decks (Name on the stairs between decks) (Ebon with some extra Kraken calamari) it became obvious that there was a second ship nearing. It was a large dark ship but had some torches lit. As they approached, a ball of fire appeared on the strange vessel and started to move toward us as if to launch at us. Just then, a bald dude appeared upon the main deck and made some gestures, which seemed to have the effect of extinguishing the flame. Ebon shouted an inquiry to the captain who responded, “Leave Aberny to his work”.
We prepared for the inevitable while ‘Aberny’ continued his chanting. Ebon, somewhat confused, tried to finger the newcomer and ended up falling to the deck instead.
Karn turned away from this new ship and started to pick up speed again. The other ship gave chase and was just about in bow range when suddenly the wind, that had so far been so friendly to us, died. the ship didn’t seem to notice and continued across the waves.
At the point at which we got to bow range, Stote could see people and all, a bolt of lightning started to grow at the top of their ship. As Stote fired an arrow and the other ship fired the lightning (damn hairy wizards) and both seemed to hit a barrier roughly 40 feet to the aft.
Karn kept shouting orders
Aberny increased his efforts…and the sea seemed to lose its grip on the ocean below. (No Ebon, it is not rain)
As we continued to pull away, we noticed that there was some large device amid-ships on the other vessel.
Suddenly, just because Stote could not identify any characteristics of the people on the other ship, we went on some racist rant about syrups and rice and shit.
Back on the ship, we all waited for something to happen but instead we just outran them. – Big anti-climax. About that time, the wizard faded out and things seemed to return to normal.
As Karn made a check of the ship, it seemed that the VIPs in the forequarters had gone missing to the smell of ozone and the chagrin of the captain.
Three Strings came on deck and reported that all were fine below and, after confirming all was well above, went below again.
Since no one wanted to include us in their secrety secrets, we all went to bed once it was clear we would be doing nothing further.
Meanwhile – Nadja found a gambling buddy. She and Esvele became better acquainted (no not that way) and shared a pleasant evening cheating at cards. At some point Esvele said she would like to watch Nadja sleep (ok not really) but sent her off to bed.
Ebon determined he could sleep in a bunk (maybe). Stote offerd him a warning and a beef jerky which almost sent Ebon back up on deck. But everyone settled in for the night. Name stayed above decks for a while but retired when it seemed nothing was happening. And he was right!
Morning came with the smells of the sea mixed with the smells of breakfast. Everyone got up and about their business. Karn was below and his spirits, like the rest of us, were up.
The rest of the day unfolds uneventfully with the ship returning to cruising speed and Waterdeep beginning to grow on the fore-port horizon.
We wrapped up with Billy telling us about the time he made airman doody outside New York.
As we arrived, none of us had encountered a bustle before. We bid Karn farewell and riddled out of him that Renaer the son of Dagult Neverember had been the guests in the forward cabin. What had become of them was not known. Karn also mentioned that the Neverember family once held power in Waterdeep and Renaer might have known the location to some hidden treasure.
Then we listened to a fireside chat about the internet from Billy. Not sure what it had to do with Waterdeep, but it did bring the room down.
Waterdeep arrival & the first few forays – 6/26/20 to 8/15/20 – 8c
2020-06-26
Billy started the evening by asking us to close our eyes and then surprised us with a music blanket of homosexuality. I read in the minutes from our last meeting and the game got underway.
We saw and marveled at the shipyards. Karn paid the harbormasters fee and we bid him farewell.
We followed 3 Strings and his crew but they were hard to keep up with as he seemed to have forgotten we were following them. We managed to keep up, as the band had no roadies. We were holding our own, even with all the new sights and sounds to absorb until Ebon decided not to hold just his own but somebody else’s to ask about the dragons (gold) wheeling above. The stranger explained these were griffon riders but didn’t get much farther before Stote interrupted with an Oscar losing performance of his worldliness.
Turns out the stranger was Artemis, an employee of the tax department. He assured us the town was safe and that things may not always be what they seem (In a good way). Then he followed up with an addendum that sucked all of the safety out of his first statement.
He prattled on about the guard, dragons, precious metals (okay, still dragons);
Meanwhile…Name caught up to 3 strings and offered to help with their gear, but Marsim was going to catch a dram, a drey, some damn d word and whisk them away. Since he explained that the drey could take us wherever we wanted for a few nib (Copper).
Although Name might have wanted to wander around and see the town, the party wanted to get their rooms and get settled. We took the slow boat (ok dray) to the Yawning Portal and we helped the group get their gear to the YP. We headed to the Winking Kettle to get rooms arranged.
It looked like a house, but had a sign out front that announced its purpose. (Damn B&Bs) As Ebon went to knock, Louisa-May Alcott answered the door. As Ebon dropped to his hands in amazement and exclaimed his love for the strange tiny woman. She welcomed us in. Stote acted the Stote while Esthral Hollandsford welcomed us to the Winking Kettle and offered us some tea and the only two rooms. Her tea poured itself and Nadja observed several other magic effects. EH indicated that there were other services that were available via magic or regular means or some combinations thereof. We rented our rooms for 2 silver each. While the place made the Port Llast hotel look like a dump it was no Hyatt in Miami. (Although I doubt the Hyatt in Miami had a magic turndown service). Ebon and Stote had fun playing with the amenities while Name stowed some of his unnecessary gear, donned his hat and then….
Then it was off to the Yawning Portal. A giant tavern with a well, Yawning Portal, in the middle of it with multiple floors all built around the feature that gave the bar it’s name. The barkeep was cleaning glasses but that menial task could not hide muscles, like cables, in the man’s arm. The greatsword hanging behind him with the words, “Don’t make me use this”,’ etched thereon.
Ebon’s curiosity quickly helped us learn that it was 1 gold in; 1 gold out of the portal itself.
Bonnie (our wench) welcomed us to the portal and loudly announced that we were ‘weergins’ at the YP. We watched Ebon try to handle the ‘Skullcrusher’ and, while the YP itself made his brains leak out of his ears, the Skullcrusher went one better and caused Ebon to run around the portal several times, which was very entertaining and earned Name a gold.
Name noticed a girl sitting all alone in the VIP section and went to make some moves. Unfortunately, while she seemed old enough for Nick (and who isn’t) but a little young for Name (at least today). Name asked what was troubling her and found that, at least in part, it was his hat. Name tossed caution (and his hat) to the wind. Nadja tipped it a bit and kept it from going into the portal, somewhat to the chagrin of the crowd.
Name returned to his conversation with the young woman and found her name was Aquilonia and she was saddened, as she could find no adventurers to take her request for aid seriously. Name saw the opportunity for her to mature a bit while the party earned favor helping her in her quest. He returned to the group to alert them that someone in the VIP room was looking for a party and would pay for all the drinks.
Nadja went over immediately while Stote and Ebon waited for their drinks and eyed the portal a bit too seriously. Stote promised to pay if Ebon jumped and so the bartender and Bonnie calmed down a bit.
Meanwhile…Name and Nadja met with Aquilonia and found that she was trying to enter the portal and retrieve some magic items. This seemed like a solid course of action but then the room outside broke out in loud cheers.
Meanwhile…Ebon had given in to Stote‘s prodding and his own bravado and leapt into the YP. Stote tossed 4 gold to the bartender and followed suit. Their landing (yes it’s really about a 50 foot pit) wasn’t the bestest, but at least they survived.
Meanwhile…Name paid his gold to go down (on the rope) to retrieve the bodies. Fortunately, they were ok and Name asked them to return to the top of the Portal. Ebon took a bit of convincing but eventually followed Stote up.
Meanwhile…Nadja and Aquilonia discussed the general mental stability of the party as well as their ‘fitness’ to help her out. While dubious Aquilonia seemed ok with things although it’s hard to know for sure since she had crazy ‘gemstone’ eyes. Aquilonia has a house nearby with enough space for us each to have our own room. In the course of the conversation Nadja determined some of the things Aquilonia was looking for which focused on all things magical including spell books.
Meanwhile…Stote broke the surface of the portal to mixed cheers and groans as the room reported the way they placed bets. While he was recovering, a half-orc female inquired after ‘the other one’, ‘the one who went first’. Stote complained about how thirsty he was so this newcomer doused him with a mug of beer, which Stote then grabbed and finished.
Meanwhile…Ebon was busy struggling to climb out of the well, but thanks to his athletic ability (and some awesome cheerleading) he was able to make it out and right into the female half-orc’s cleavage. It was a smothering grip of death and Ebon fought valiantly to break free and did so with ease. And then broke right back in.
Meanwhile…Nadja saw the opportunity to help a friend and cop a feel and so she rushed over to lay her hands on Stote. Where she chose to lay her hands was obviously to speed the healing process. Nadja gave Stote a beer and a gentle squeeze and he seemed to appreciate it enough to realize he had survived.
Meanwhile…Bing (I mean Name) simply hopped on board the bucket and rode to the top.
Meanwhile…Ebon was babbling brooking (who knows what a motorboat is?) Stote is talking himself up and Ebon down to our new acquaintance Aquilonia. While Name came up over the edge.
Meanwhile…Some punk kids started playing their bass too loud down in the pit and a hush fell over the barroom as a giant arm shot out, followed by the rest of the giant.
Aquilonia started things off by pew-pew-pewing the giant with some magic missiles.
2020-07-02 – First time into the DotMM
Damn, Billy always seems prepared. Started tonight’s session with far less homosexual blankety-ness than last week.
In a recap of why the hell we’re all here we were reminded of Obaya Udey (The dead bitch from Stote‘s hometown, Oakhurst) had told Nadja to get magic items for the wizard she works for. Sort of a generic ‘hook’ for the dungeon.
In the course of discussing this we saw Aquilonia‘s quest sort of aligned with our and it seemed we were destined to head down. Name asked Aquilonia point-blank if she too, like the other girl before her, was working for an unnamed mage.
Sung: (Madam blue)
Once long ago, I dreamed of a tower, but the tower turned to dust. O’er the turnings of time, as the world turned around Halsaster’s tower that once went up, is now going down. So forging ahead, we’ll go down the whole, we may wind up dead, but we won’t lose our souls. – If we do, then we’re screwed.
Durgar, Drow, mithril mines, underhalls, Hallister (Yep, he’s the mad mage.) and his minions. Also known as black cloak. Years of evil wacky shit. Planar travel. Weird beings captured. Torture and Mayhem. Everybody crazy. You stay here too long – you crazy too.
Waterdeep sits on undermountain (or the remains thereof) and early settlers knew of undermountain. Dernan indeed was an adventurer that was drawn to these adventures and, while he seemed to have finished, came up with a really shitty retirement plan. Hence the Yawning Portal. (Maybe we should just rob him?)
Billy showed off his mad art skills and Ebon’s axe healed him back up a bit. Nadja finished the job and Ebon felt good enough to try the Mint Wine and Yagra, while pooh-poohing the wine, had one as well and her comeliness increased to photos 1 & 2 again. (She’s really a 4, but that’s better than a 3).
Aquilonia re-initiated her invitation to stay at her home, but since the rooms were paid for and had those vibrating beds, the party decided to sleep it off at the winking kettle.
Yagra was saddened at Ebon’s departure but wasn’t bright enough to take Name up on his hint that Ebon could easily be followed.
As we got back the the Winking Kettle the doors all walmarted for us and we were suitably impressed (oooo aaaaah).
Ebon decided a roof’s as good as a bedroll and headed up to the roof. He glanced down and happened to seee a figure searching about. Turned out to be Yagra (guess she’s not as dumb as Ebon after all). Ebon once got busy in a WK no room. They got crazy, allow them to amaze we. Rafters squeaked so hard Stote be actin’ hazy.
While Ebon and Yagra were doin’ the bone dance, we were all doin’ the divy divy settling up from previous troves.
Meanwhile – E & Y got their freak on and got way too personal about Herve Vilachaiz and the night wore on. Ebon recognized one but couldn’t connect the dots until Yagra ‘splained it to him. Still a vacant look. Stote apparently snores in Half-orc, as he was able to direct Ebon from a distance.
Suddenly, Ebon became an intellectual and Yagra became the worst schoolgirl ever. They discussed the Zentarim and how wonderful Yagra thought they were. Ebon was lost again, but Joe recovered.
Nadja went to her room, laid out all her toys and started yelling ‘Oh God! Oh God! (Ok, not that but she prayed to her god Hella. (Then babbled on about her god, but I stopped listening). The room quieted respectfully and reminded her of home.
Stote and Name both sacked out, not together, but at the same time. Name laid out all of his gear expecting something…wonderful. Ebon did his best to keep Stote up, no not like that, but there was some pounding involved.
The story petered off and all (except Ebon) were awakened by magic breakfast. Each person’s tray was covered with the perfect fixins and Stote and Name both filled their packs with bacon and biscuits as well as other potables that looked like they may travel well.
Billy and Steve went to hang out together…hmmm.
Ebon managed to keep his liquid dinner down and Yagra gave him the snuggly noises, half-orc style. He wandered off to find a breakfast, which he fetched back to Yagra who thanked him and ate most of it before she realized that it was supposed to be a two-fer.
Name got his bath on as did Nadja (although he with a bit more decorum). Whether or not Nadja took advantage of all the girly shit, Name certainly did. He left the Winking Kettle smelling ready for victory.
E&Y stayed all ‘drifters’ and shit watching the griffon riders and generally doing silly shit. The clothes that had been discarded the evening before were cleaned and fresh (And somehow the word DOWNY came to mind) Could have been the April Freshness or just Ebon repeatedly telling Stote to Go Down!.
Ebon ended up starting the day a bit hungry but then saw the bath and Billy got all excited and -they- went off together.
When we left EH was out front and bid us a fond farewell. She offered us refunds but Stote and Name refused, but for different reasons.
Ebon, Name, and Nadja all came down smelling swell with Yagra as well. She, looking fresh as a gnarly old daisy. W.W.E.D?
So, early morning found us back at the Yawning Portal where the giant was gone having been replaced by the Bob Villa of gray furniture gnomes who was fixing the table the giant had killed the night before. Nadja offered to help, but he had none of it.
The crowd was about the same as the night before. A random group of characters with some variation. One notable addition was a stocky gent with a keen eye for seasoned adventurers. He offered us breakfast ale, which seemed to surprise Aquilonia when she arrived. The guy referred to her as ‘Lady’ Aquilonia and Name must be the tallest of the group as that seemed to go over everyone else’s head. The man was Meloon Wardragon, one of the Force Grey. While he seemed pretty happy to join us at first, he rushed off somewhat quickly, jostling Aquilonia on the way.
We figured out how the escalators work, with a little help from Brett, and managed to get a 50-trip pass courtesy of ‘Lady’ Aquilonia.
We got to the bottom and Aquilonia was able to quickly ferret out the secret door and the fact that nothing here was magical.
We couldn’t figure out the secret door (Name couldn’t figure out his own feet) so we set off down the only path.
My god we go slowly in dungeons… so after about an hour, we finally got to the first thing of note. A hallway filled with gateways to hell. (Demon Bas reliefs) was investigated by some of us and we were able to identify the following: Necademon-aq, Nalshe-nu, Balor-nu,…Nadja identified the rest (sure she cheated with Guidance). Ebon was a bit concerned at Nadja‘s ‘Demon-Knowledge-EEE’ but finally figured that might be okay for a cleric.
There was a skeleton on the floor and he seemed to be pointing at something, which, although Stote walked on by, we (ok Aquilonia) determined to be a secret door. We opened it easily and found Princess Leia area 1. We decided that we were no Han Solos and closed the door without further investigation.
Toucan Stote followed his nose (as did the rest of us) into a room full of pillars where,…SURPRISE – there was a bugbear with a morning star (not a morning ale).
While Stote reacted well, it appears the rest of us were somewhat languid after our baths.
Stote was pretty sneaky-sneaky and did some good damage.
Aquilonia was surprised when her fire bolted.
Name shot that poison arrow and hit, but apparently not the heart.
Nadja danced across the hall and cast Taco Bell, but the bugbear wasn’t running for any border.
Ebon held his action cuz he was a bit too far away but then the Bruce Jenner of bugbears hit him with a Javelin.
The bugbears got their go round and did ok hitting Stote and Ebon. (Apparently, 2 Bruce Jenners)
Stote retaliated by striking his bugbear (not with a weapon, but just the fear of god).
Aquilonia was still warming up and so didn’t hit just yet.
Name got off another hot round with the bow hitting the second bugbear.
Nadja thought we sneezed and cast Bless you on us all.
Ebon, a bit angrier now (and already green) decided to attack. Must not have been angry enough cuz he missed.
The first bugbear came back with their own attacks and showed Ebon how you’re supposed to hit. The second saw the chance to gang bang someone and hit Ebon as well. Swell, now Ebon’s hurt. Aquilonia voiced concern about Ebon but Name reminded her of his fine ‘bottom finding’ skills.
Stote stole in and fanned the bugbears for a second or two. Aquilonia went with the sure thing and killed a bugbear with a couple pew-pews. Unfortunately, a brain with legs popped out.
Name picked the un-knowner of 2 evils and attacked the brain dog.
Nadja healed Ebon by waving her hands at the braindog (weird). Course it could have been the yelling “walk it off” that helped. Who knows?
Ebon, feeling a bit better but still angry, struggled to find the rage within him. Billy helped. He then swung an angry miss but, with a little cheering from the crowd, managed to miss again. Well, at least he’s consistent.
The last bugbear seemed to be learning from our mistakes and hit Ebon again. Ebon was so angry that the attack wasn’t quite as poky as it should be.
Stote went to pet the braindog, fucked that up and killed it sneakily. He then slunk over to the bugbear and, after continuing the losing streak, got inspired to turn that frown upside down and do some damage.
Aquilonia with the pew-pew went and killeded that bugbear.
Out popped another braindog and Name immediately shot an arrow near it. That didn’t work so, inspired by this new knowledge, he turned that frown upside down too.
Nadja brought her own inspiration to the battle, hit it once, and then, with the help of her god, hit it again.
Ebon was now ‘marvin the martian’ angry and, since his opponent was no longer an armored bugbear his sloppy swing was able to kill the brain dog.
Stote and Ebon seemed a bit torn up, but after Nadja gave them a bit more healing, they were ready to head south. (Ask me about that note)
“Certain death this way.”
2020-07-11
Yet another fabulous recap started the evening (Right at 7:15 as expected)
Then Steve and Billy started their verbal snuggling a little early. When they got back, Stote ran back up the highway to hell (insert fancy song if you want).
Searched the bugbears and found 4 javelins (this includes the ones sticking out of Ebon {which gives him first pick of those}). Two morning stars were also discovered. The well-dressed bugbear had pouches with a wagon wheel symbol. We got a little coin. Steve and Billy went and verbally snuggled again. It turned into dating. Gee, glad I got here on time.
Turns out the wagon wheel wasn’t the cheese I was hankerin for but instead a symbol of Xanathar (Not Zentarim). This was similar to the ring that Nadja had and we took a moment to make Aquilonia aware.
Ebon stayed focused on the sign and then came up with the great idea to go that way.
Nadja went a little father and checked out the really long hall to certain death and so…we went north.
We checked out a hallway and then another hallway (oops, thought we were going to the other hallway, but after a brief discussion about beer and farts, we (Stote) went to check the door.
Seemed like the coast was clear and so Stote opened the door and we went in.
There was a suit of armored voices in the room and some sort of sticky thing. We were able to find some small holes way up in the ceiling where the noise seemed to be coming from.
We focused on the armor, as we weren’t feeling too holy. We found that a sword sticking out of the armor was magical and a little handy.
We started to discuss this and then Billy and Brandi got frisky and went off together. They came back and we got an identity out of the deal.
Stote decided a short rest was in order and so that’s what we did. Billy asked everyone else what they wanted to do except Name and so we hung out. Good thing we did as it turns out the sword was cursed. We finished our rest, didn’t seem too restful for Stote. Would have been better with a beer.
We wrapped up the rest and moved on through the dungeon of really long hallways. Stote checked the T intersection and discovered more really long hallways.
We clanged our way to the east and Stote was suitably impressed with our grace and style. He finished his investigation and found a one-way secret door back to the portal.
We went back to the far door and started in that room. Stote checked things out and found two whores (Ebon) doors (everyone else), the two girls in the hall (Name).
Michalangelo x3 had names on their plinths. One of the statues was Elyndraun Smellybottom.
We heard some vampires? down the hall but then one must have stepped in dog shit cuz they yelled out profanity and nothing further happened.
Ruathendar Stupiddskull was the middle statue.
Aquilonia found a broken stick and put it in her bag.
Speaking of bags, two douchebags came down the hallway with sticks pushing Stote caltraps out of the way. (Ok, didn’t tell you about them earlier but it seemed like such a small thing). Stote got mad about the caltrops and shot one of them with a bow. That one remarked that he felt no pain from the non-magical attack. (Oops)
All this didn’t phase Nadja as she charged down the corridor, killed one of them, and then figured out that these must be fan-pires.
Billy told Aquilonia he’d be there if she needed any ‘help’ but instead Name helped out by taking out her opponent.
One of them makes a break for it and Nadja actually breaks it for him. Not enough to kill him but maybe sped him up a bit. Dude went flying around the corner and seemed like he would get away even though Name told him he would take his foot.
Stote and Ebon went after him and hit him a bit more.
Suddenly, the wheels are in motion – no that’s not it…?
Suddenly Nadja was surrounded in the hall by opponents. She dinged a guy in the melon; mostly cuz that guy tried to ding her melon.
Aquilonia went with the Firebolt, but I missed how that turned out.
Name took out one of the foes and threatened to take everybody’s foot.
Pussywhip kept running and now whistling – and Stote and Ebon gave chase. Stote shot him and still didn’t go down.
The gang tried to bang Nadja but only hit once.
Nadja came back and started banging the gang in return. Her first hit didn’t get the job done but her god inspired her to do more and more she did.,
Aquilonia went with another FB and then there was a small debate regarding spell slots.
Name moved in, swung and miss, got inspired by the second pitch and knocked it (and his opponent out of the park)
The running man kept running and Ebon continued to chase – even though the squirrely little fucker went through a secret door. Ebon wasn’t quick enough to catch the door but Stote was.
Stote charged through the door and ran him to ground.
Name was further inspired and couldn’t wait to kill the next guy, so he went ahead of everyone and did it.
The rapidly dwindling group attacked Nadja again. This time Billy figured out their mechanics and managed to kill Nadja, then un-kill her, then miss her just to unnerve them.
Nadja then played physician and healed herself.
Aquilonia (Look I am paying attention) She went with a scorcher and made the last two guys toasty.
Got back to the running, whistling, now crying man and he crtitted Stote while crying like a bitch. He got him again with his dagger but wasn’t man enough to close the deal.
Ebon returned the favor by critting the whiny biatch and, while he made him a bit less pretty, he didn’t put him in his grave.
Stote came back and…wounded his guy enough to go through his pockets.
Name acted out again (of turn) and did some damage to the lastest guy and drew the attack.
Last guy went and did some damage to Name.
Nadja missed – thanks a bunch
Aquilonia debated what to do and, although missing with her first firebolt seemed like it would miss, but she got inspired to get it right and killded the last guy.
Just as we heard the sounds of boots charging down the hall, we ended for the evening.
2020-07-18 – What went down, comes back up (to the Yawning Portal)
Ok. Slow start, had to set up the new PC. Beans and rice and all prevented me from thinkin’ ahead.
Stote and Ebon were trying to bring down the house. Ok, just a coffin with a little depressed dirt, but take it down anyway.
Everyone else was searching bodies. Name found two healing potions (searching himself) and gave one to Nadja.
Aquilonia was hearing things and Name and Nadja weren’t. Not even the sound of Stote loudly fearing death as Ebon continued reckin’ up the place.
Nadja wanted to head north but Name suggested finishing the pillage first.
Went and drank a bunch and talked to Zoe. Some shit happened for Stote and Ebon.
We cleaned out the bodies and then tried to clean out the rooms. We know that the other guys have taken too long but you have to clear the rear.
Stote started running backward with his bow and Ebon followed sneakily. He scared Stote into shooting a corpse in the dick. (Don’t stop woody) They kept moving, the corpse farted and Ebon ended up smelting it even though he didn’t dealt-ing it.
We found more hallways and decided to focus on Stote and Ebon.
They were headed back our way but I didn’t know it so I smacked Steve around. T’was ok tho cuz I took it back.
Stote cruised out at a mile per minute and left Ebon in the dust.
We all surged back to the big room to find Stote and Ebon and we all regrouped. Then Michael Jacksoned back up to the portal.
Ass grabbin’ bastard (Maloon Wardragon) gave us shit for comin’ up early. Ebon was disgusted at Stote for drinking light beer instead of Stone Piss. Nadja stuck a coin down her own blouse for Duim to go after and AGB asked what he needed to do to get some (Coin?)
Name wowed the crowd with tales of our prowess and lack of beverage blow. He won a round of drinks, which he gave to the group. He then ordered something to impress the ladies. Got a mind flayer and slammed it. Oops!
Catch me I’m fallin’ catch me now I’m fallin’. Ebom and Aquilonia heard (and answered the call). The place went nuts and I got another drink (in real life).
Ebon and Name (ok, I guess so) went back to the winking kettle and sackeded out and it only cost 3 gold.
Ebon went to the roof using the Yagra approach. Apparently he was thinking about her feet? He made it all ‘drifters’ style.
The rest of the group went back to Aquilonia‘s house (Trollskull manor) and Stote did manage to not be raped?
Ebon and Name got up and had the magic breakfast. Name was seemingly none the worse for the wear.
On the far side of town, the rest of the party awoke and arose with various levels of enthusiasm
It was apparent that Aquilonia slept way in. She left a note saying you suck, someone else will be better, smell you later.
They took a free cab back to the YP.
Name had a nice bath. Eboin tried to overpay. Name refreshed his potatables and pre-paid for Ebon to have breakfast.
Name heads towards the trades ward. He got a 2 wheel cart to look for healing poisons. He quickly arrived at Janed apothecary and stuff. Paid Sampson 3 silver for the ride.
60 Gp for regular and 500 for potent. If you buy 10, they are only 500. Name bought two.
We met back up at the YP, and Stote and Name went back to the store and got the 10 pack, then went back to the YP.
2020-07-25 – Second trip to the DotMM
Robert’s Rules of order – we read in the minutes from the last. – Damn – I was drunk –
We have (20) 4 portal trips left!
Drank a bottle of wine to make a note cuz we were really drunk last week.
Get Paper – Step 2… – Step 3 Aquilonia reads note
Peeled off the label – took two people. Step 1 done
Name cut himself, used his hat feather as a quill, and wrote out the following:
“We’re ready when you are. Meet us in the portal!”
We drank another glass of wine waiting for Aquilonia to answer. Got something. A pen! And some advice.
After trying some feet of fury, we went the normal way.
Pulled a Denzel Washington (BOE) at the pillar room “You know what the good thing about bugbears is? You can smell ’em hiding behind the pillar from a mile away.”
Turns out this bugbear wanted to be bestest buddies. Turns out we all don’t get along down here and he could use some allies.
Little Q&A revealed that the ‘Undertakers’ were the enemy and our new buddy was Zanahan.
He offered 75x5GP for the head of a flesh golem and added an offer of information as a bonus.
We headed the northish way and debated the right or left. We want to go right, but Stote checks left. He found a smelly room of death…we went right. We took out that stupid one-way door (Happy feet).
We wandered around the hallways of the mad mage and ended up back in the statue room. We edged south and noticed the fine work of the maid – everything was cleaned up- Checking things out, it looked like the cleaning was pretty thorough.
In a room to the north, we found a key ‘al fresco’. Not sure what it fits. The rest of the area was clear so we went back to the stinky room. Cuz thinking with your dick works sometimes (although, when you think about it, it was Stote‘s dick that suggested this).
The room was full of goo, the tentacles went coo, Stote fell in doo doo, after finding at least two.
Name, finally able to see a threat, fired at the floating death baby and hit.
Ebon went and charged right in, slipped, fell, rose, then slipped again and although he was half-funning, Name yelled out ‘watch the running’.
Name shot and hit again. The arrows he was shooting pierced more lightly than Stote‘s cutting words (NOT).
Nadja finished it off with Toll of the dead.
Ebon started pounding on the one remaining and dealt it some damage.
The flying death baby retaliated by hitting Ebon with his testacles and restraining him.
Ebon was unable to retort due to his restraint.
Stote missed initially but felt inspired to sneak in some extra damage. He danced away and moved like Fred Astaire and not Fred Flinstone.
Name hit again for a bit less damage.
Nadja guided a bolt in the creature’s ass.
The FDB went num-num-num and did some pretty big damage to Ebon. He started to fly away with Ebon.
Ebon heard a splat and figured it was a nice poop. Even though it was a poop, it pissed Ebon off and he was inspired to hit it early and often doing enough damage to make it scream.
Stote danced back in. Oops, a Flintstone. But he was able to recover and put an end to the creature. Avoided putting an end to Ebon when he fell.
Ebon continued the attack and made sure it was dead and then shrugged off his wounds.
Stote continued to whine about people who could do damage from the hallway.
After a bit of poking about for treasure, Name had had enough and Ebon and Stote decided to leave before Ebon got a case of sepsis.
We adjourned to the sword/hand room where Stote continued to belittle Name. Sooooo Name left.
Hmmm, if I’m not there – who keeps notes?
Stote, Ebon, and Nadja finished a short rest and then decided (finally) that discretion was the better part of valor and went to leave. They encountered Carrion Crawlers (Billy mask your images)
Once again, they chose discretion and that’s where we ended.
Name pissed away his insp~ NOTES Lost due to shutdown
2020-08-01
The team had a short rest (Carried over from last session) and went to head out but found those unhidden images. They slammed the door and went to go out the back way. However, Name beat them to the punch by coming in the back way. He brought more wine and then decided to continue north.
We found a bigass room to the north with 70′ ceilings. There was a boner throne that Ebon thought about touching but at the last minute, decided not to.
Nadja and Ebon moved to inspect a large corpse in the middle of the room. Turns out it was a Wyvern, which might have been killed by meth (crystal that is).
Name went to check out the throne and got bit for his troubles. Throne seat was a chest, but empty.
We went after ‘pig snorer’ and found (other than Nadja is noisy) a small room with a wakening creature and a charging flesh golem. (Name was aware that these are summoned/constructs).
Stote opened with a bow shot and danced away.
Name drank another healing potion (just in case).
Nadja clanked up and told the Golem to grovel. It did not.
The Golem attacked but missed and Name shouted down to the female voice that they were friends. She shouted back to Frankie to ‘stop’ but he didn’t.
Ebon decided to ‘splain it to Frankie the hard way and started to choppin on him with the axe. Ebon did more describin than damage and everyone reminded Billy that his axe was magical.
Aquilonia isn’t here so she didn’t do anything.
The woman attacked Ebon and seemed pretty capable.
Stote finished off the golen and took the fight out of Harria who surrendered rather than die and we commenced to getting the low down on the dungeon.
We got some extra area opened up on the map and a little info on those areas. We took Harria to get the rest of her crew and offered to let them leave and found out that Nadja appears to be a really common name. Harria talked them out and we walked them back to the portal.
Harria gave Ebon the amulet of Frankie control who eventually gave it back in exchange for a paw.
We sent the troupe on their way except for Beaker, the shape changer, who agreed to accompany us for a bit to meet with the Zanahan (not Xanathar) for our reward. 5 Harbor Moons and 125 Dragons. We got Beaker out of there and returned to the room in the north.
Nadja took a bit of time to find out if we had any magicy stuff. We did not…
We continued to the north and went left. Stote scouted ahead and we found an old suit of armor and apparently a calendar cuz we found out that it was the fourth Day, 4th Kythorn, 1492 DR (whatever that means).
We did find an iFit note on the wall indicating we had walked 2000 steps.
We continued to find only hallway until Ebon tried a door which caused an avalanche of skulls and introduced Nadja to Fuzzy Wuzzy the spider. Fuzzy Wuzzy isn’t living, is he?
Ebon kicked around in the skulls for stuff and got a centipede bite for his troubles (damn purple pinky).
We continued down the hall to a dead end. Name was sure it would connect to the hall in the south, but Ebon, leaning on the wall checking his new wound, found a door to the north.
The small room contained a cobwebby helm and a throne both made of copper. We had another bottle of wine and let Nadja detect magic. She discovered our magic items and nothing else.
After some debate, stupid (I mean Name) caved in to peer pressure, donned the helmet, and sat on the throne. Of course, nobody left the room first so when the wand fell from the ceiling instead of a fireball, we were all very happy.
Nadja‘s lingering detect magic was triggered by the wand that appeared out of nowhere (surprise, surprise, surprise).
Thinking this would be a great place to camp, Stote ran out and triggered the door. Unfortunately, he also ran back in.
Seeing imminent danger (or death by starvation), Nadja tried to stop the door with her shield. She was only somewhat successful.
Now pretty much trapped in the room, we thought it might be a good time to search for a trigger ‘in’ the room as well. Stote managed to redeem himself by locating a hard to find trigger and Name opened another bottle of wine to celebrate.
Nadja figured out she could fix her shield and all was well with the world.
And…scene.
2020-08-08
The date is Fifth-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR (Still, what the fuck does that mean)
Stote turned out to be trans. That got his stone whet and sharpened the scimitars.
After some time passed (who knows, we get iFit notes but not iPhone alarms.) Ebon woke up a bit on the groggy side.
We supplemented our rations with some of the tasty potables Name brought from the Winking Kettle and took the edge of our ‘yucks’ with a fresh bottle of wine. (10 bottles left)
Nadja might have gotten an early start on the wine cuz she thought about holding the wand to attune to it. Name reminded her of the cursed sword (and associated hand), Ebon advised to go for it (Name is such a worrywart). Looks like the warts win, cuz Nadja checked it out for a bit and determined that it was a ‘Wand of Secrets’ and that, with the word “Apanta”, it would somehow reveal secret doors. Nadja tested it out and detected the secret door that really wasn’t a secret. Seems like there are 3 charges and they may recover every morning (some or one, still unclear).
We exited and went back the way we came. We checked out the smell of northern death and found a copse; er I mean corpse. Actually more than one, but only one human and some dead spiders.
Stote and Ebon used rock, paper, Nadja; to try to retrieve the treasure but Stote must have lost, as he went to check things out. Determining that the human probably died from spider bites, he grabbed the scimitar and the empty coin purse and crossbow. He made the decision to take to two best regular scimitars and then finally followed Ebon down to the dead end (no worries there, Ebon used the old find traps movement to make sure it was safe). The hallway dead-ended and we heard the voice of Carol Burnett’s dad who is tickled pink that we’re having a good time.
We all spent an inordinate amount of time trying to figure out the hallway voices. We spent a wand charge searching for secret doors and then Stote thought better of it, or himself and searched some more. Nope, Nadja (I mean nada).
We moved on to the Disney’s hall of monuments where the previous spider battles had been. There were some giant spider corpses.
The room was so scary; Billy had to go talk to Aquilonia for a moment to calm down.
When he came back, we checked out the hallway and connected corridors.
At the end of a hall that went south, we found a guy digging his way out. It appeared that he might have been doing this for a while since he was a ghost or something. We figured out we couldn’t help him and moved on.
The door to the north opens onto a sloping passage. We followed it down to a room with an acrid liquid ceiling. We panicked for a while and then Nadja went into the room and used the dwarf key to open a box held by a four armed fishman with a dick like a baseball bat, a ‘sahoggin’. There was a dessicated organ in there (hey, we’re all gettin’ old). Ebon picked up the organ and then smelled the box. Hmm, touch then investigate, odd, but moving right along.
Ebon and Nadja both thought we were a little understaffed (magic user staff that is) and that we should go find Aquilonia and get her back with the group. After some debate, we talked Ebon into taking the heart (hey, what kind of organ did you think we were talking about?) and when he put it in a pouch he got some insight into the fact that the monkey paw he got from Harria may be helping him somehow.
Be that as it may, we left, headed south and got to the next door. Oh Boy!!! More Hallway!!! Ebon had a brief chat (Really brief) but the hallway didn’t answer.
We found a room full of old weapons and there was another door but it seemed like nobody wanted to open it so after a brief debate Stote checked for traps and Name opened the door and found a grinder, not the tasty kind, but the kind that works on weapons. Like most of us, the wheel is broken.
Instead of doing as god suggested, we decided to delve further. We went to the large double doors and, even though there was an unidentified rune on the door, we opened it. By we I mean Ebon and Nadja since Stote was being a platypus (well, Ebon said the ‘P’ word). Upon opening, they were both imbued with massive negative effect (Just kidding). They were both imbued with the positive Anarath rune.
Also, upon opening the door, the party (Ebon and Nadja) was/were shot at by a man-ti-cor.
Nadja and Ebon both took a bit of damage, but not too much.
Name was able to hit the floor with a torch, but little else.
Stote did about as well with his bow.
The manticore came back around and did better this time. Ebon and Nadja were both damaged pretty heavily.
Eobon ‘axed’ the manticore a question, but was just angry, not actually enraged.
Nadja threw on a bandaid
Name fired a warning shot buyt the Manticore didn’t care.
Stote snuck in some damage on Man3 and then added to that.
The manticores (menticore?) came up to bat and the Comedy Legends fanned all three to get back up to bat.
Ebon debated and then raged and hius description of his rage was sooooo good that he wnet into an inspired rage. Better still he managed to hit Man3 and do some good damage. He was then inspired to attack again, but missed.
Nadja commanded Man2 to grovel and grovel.
Name tried to give it what it was begging for, struck once with his greatsword, and dinged it up a bit.
He then surged on and attacked again, missing at first but feeling inspired to try again. The second time’s the charm and he did more damage.
Stote continued with Man3 (trying to get charged with Man1) and did a bunch of damage.
Unforkunately all three were still up and about so here they go again.
Man1 kept hitting Ebon.
Man2 kept groveling
Man3 said he was no longer engaged which hurt Stote so bad he got no attack of opportunity.
Ebon, putting the crazy in Crazymane as his chosen opponent fled and he boarded Man2 and chopped into his spine.
Name told Nadja to ‘bring out your dead’ but Man2 did hear the bell.
Name hit for some good damage, but was only inspired enough to miss the second time.
Stote killed Man3 which was trying to flee so thats more like murder2 than man3, but dead is dead, not really as he stabbed it some more. Well that pissed off the 2 remaining creatures which made them try to kill us more?
Man 1 took a shot getting the barbarian off his back but, not having inspiration, had to settle for a miss.
Man2 couldn’t hit the broad side of a Name and so we came back around to Ebon.
Still angry at the world Ebon axed the manticore another question and the answer was blood.
Nadja said a prayer for the dying, which actually helps stop them from doing so. Nadja and Ebon were healed.
Name had to draw upon his inspiration to successfully hit but Man2 didn’t go down.
Just then, the door next to Stote burst open and in came the ugly green giant (troll).
Stote swung and missed but ran anyway.
Then there was some confusion about damage and Ebon was hurt, and then healed, then hurt again as the manticore (and billy) figured out that his rage effect wasn’t resisting damage.
Man2 tried to take a bite out of crime but took a small bite out of Name since crime wasn’t around.
Ebon showed that even when you do shtty damage you don’t necessarily do shitty damage.
Nadja rang out the dead on Man1 but didn’t get the man one.
Name missed but Nadja inspired him to go back and get the kill.
The troll was hearing none of Name’s reason and continued to troll around the room trolling over towards Stote.
Stote, a bit shy about all of the attention missed with his bow.
Man1 hit Ebon and did a little damage.
Ebon, being ‘even’ headed, disengaged Man1 and tried to get engaged to the troll. But Man1 said, this is a relationship biatch, we’re not getting disengaged! Man1 took the ‘opportunity’ to send Ebon off with a parting bite.
Name…has to wait until next week.
2020-08-15 – Wrapping up our second trip down
So, still the date is Fifth-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. Still don’t know what the flock of seagulls that means but here we go, here we go, here we go again, oh here we go again.
Now we’ve decided to kill all the trolls on the internet or just the one in this room, whichever comes first.
Name got this started slowly by doing the minimum damage on a two dice roll.
Ebon was given the opportunity to take a whack at the troll and did enough to get his attention.
The Troll returned the favor and did a little bit of damage to Ebon.
Stote tried to get the last manticore off the field of combat but didn’t quite kill it off.
Man1 didn’t think about it much and kept attacking Ebon.
Ebon attacked the troll again and didn’t roll ones, so hurrah.
Nadja showed off her Dark Knight skills and brought Bane into the combat. Some technical difficulties were cleared up and we were back to the top of the order.
Name pulled the old ‘kill stealer’ move and then there was one. He moved over to discuss events with the troll who wasn’t listening.
The troll showed why folks always try to kill them by putting some heavy damage on Ebon who didn’t seem too phased by it based on his rage.
Stote snuck in some damage Bette Midler style
Ebon wanted to return the Troll’s favor but wasn’t feeling quite polite enough.
Nadja gave everyone aids, which in this case is a good thing. We all enjoyed the extra HP.
Name finally stopped rolling ones, and did some damage but was chagrined (yep, that’s what Billy said, chagrined) to see the wound start to close.
The troll continued his attempts to eat Ebon.
Stote moved up to join the line and snuck in more damage from a bit closer.
Ebon managed to kill some of the Troll’s loincloth so we could all see his nuts a bit better.
Nadja tried to cause wounds but missed the point (is there really a point to a spell, or is it only swords?)
Name lost his focus for a moment but recovered it enough to do some pretty good damage and called out that the troll was healing.
The Troll countered with the throat ripper on Ebon and we’ll need to figure that out.
Stote was only batting 500, but still heaped more damage on the troll.
Ebon laid on the floor.
Nadja Gave Ebon a leg up via the big toe.
Name tried to score the kill but only managed to inspire Ebon.
The troll got mad about all the nut shots and turned his attention to Name. Doing some good damage.
Stote was having none of it and snuck in enough damage to bring the Troll down.
Name wasn’t confident that the troll’s evident regeneration was over and watched for a while. Nadja suggested a short rest.
Ebon drank one of his potions and was saddened at the poor quality.
More wine – down to nine- Opps not yet – see below.
We figured out that we could part out the Manticores for a little cash. But Name noticed that the Troll was continuing to heal.
Ebon and Name continued to try to turn the troll into a pudding while Nadja dismembered the Manticors.
Stote snuck off to find out what he could and found a stinky room.
While Name and Ebon kept hacking the troll, Stote and Nadja searched some piles at the south end of the room. N&E found that acid works and S&N found a chain shirt, a necklace, a flute and some coins.
We took a short rest. Then, no matter how Billy and I tried, no one would go to get Aquilonia. So we went to the smelly room instead. We found nothing but as we left the room we were attacked by an invitation to the opera.
“Renaer tells us you are a good bet. He bought you tickets to the opera tonight at the Lightsinger Theater in the Sea Ward. If you are interested, meet Mirt at intermission. Private Box C. Formal attire is required for admittance.”
We finally returned to the Yawning Portal, after a couple drinks were ordered, and some food as well, Durinin presented us a letter from Aquilonia.
“I have a few leads I am pursuing. If you return to the portal, have a meal on me. I should return in the evening. Aquilonia”
Piatrans Clothiers for formal attire when you only have a little time.
Something happened with Stote and Ebon, which stole them away for a moment. When they returned they almost didn’t remember the name of the tailor right away but Ebon managed to recall the name and they took a cab.
There were some initial challenges getting Ebon and Stote cleaned up but a couple Suns cleared that all up and got Ebon a happy ending. They ended up with suits of clothes and we were off to the Lightsinger Theater by way of the yawning portal.
The entire bar was dumbstruck by Ebon’s appearance in his fancies and….
…we’ll find out next time.
Ebonhond: dilettante to corpse and back – 8/22/20 – 9/19/20 – 5c
2020-08-22 – A night at the opera
We stowed our gear at the Winking Kettle and headed on to the theater.
Ebon was quite the hit and turned out to be a stunning (stunted) conversationalist. He provided a great opportunity for the opera goers to be helpful as well.
We found (and Stote hid from) Aquilonia at the Will Call window.
We went and enjoyed the tiny voiced entertainers putting on the ‘Goodberrys’ and resisted the urge to ZZZ-memememe ZZZ-memememe until intermission. When the show broke for intermission, we met Mirt and he greeted us with knowledge and friendliness. He was not put off buy Stote trying to mask his identity when his amulet seemed to tell him otherwise.
We learned he was a member of the Harpers and a bit of an adventurer (in olden days). {See after Maxine}
We enjoyed Gold Dragon Flagons and (Fairy Logs) pretzels although the waiter blew his opportunity to get tipped (even though he didn’t accept them.
Mirt assured Name that tRenaer was fine and Name voiced his relief (really, the amulet didn’t warn him about that?)
Stote saw little opportunity for theft and noted guards around the theater as well.
We went back to enjoy more high pitched acting and talk shop with Mirt who advised of the dangers of the Zh(J)entarim and asked us to find his agent Maxine (a draft horse) that pulls one of the drey (DoubleDecker Bus).
An armed man appeared and, after a freakishly strong Mirt advised Ebon that the man was no threat, he left with him. He reminded us about Maxine on the way out.
The harpers are a group of folks who go about Waterdeep helping as they can for the people and the NeverEmbers. They are altruists that work behind the scenes doing things we aren’t supposed to know.
They conduct their business in tavern houses and quiet places where privacy or cover might be found. Fond of Bards and Wizards, the Harpers also have a member named Remalia Haventree (Thanks Aquilonia).
Ebon had another GDF even though the room was already spinning.
So we took a Hire-Coach (Yep, I think that’s what they’re called) over to the stables and after a bit of haggling, managed to get in to see Maxine.
Aquilonia began to narrow the field for Stote to converse with and Nadja to well… and then used the process of elimination to locate the hiding horse.
After a bit of banter (yep – banter with a horse) and a oatey bribe, Aquilona ‘persuaded Maxine to come forward and spill
She gave a ride to a Sun Elf and his half-orc bodyguard at an intersexual, homosextion, intersection near the markets. They went to the YP but on the way, they spoke of finding spies to ferret out Xanathar Guild Hideouts in the city. When asked, Maxine was able to recall that the half-orc was a greenskilled female wearing leather ‘barding’ with a red gem around her neck. Ebon fondly thought of Yagra Zh(J)entarim.
Well – that took a while
Maxine seemed satisfied with her surroundings and content to sleep but asked if we could get her another Fairy Log (or tell Mirt).
We all went back to Aquilonia‘s, and went through the front door and found out that she lives in/above a bar. Woohoo!
We did the whole tour of the home thing and then got back to drinkin. Ebon was oh so careful with his little sissy glass of elven wine and as he took his first drink he toasted the dragon flying over (nothing to do with the wine). Aquilonia was so impressed with Ebon’s dainty-ness she gave him another bottle.
As the bells struck 12 we wrapped up and Ebon went to get his regular gear back from Nadja‘s hole. Nadja took a really, really, really, really long time to locate Ebon’s gear, but eventually located his 8 inches, er gear, and we all went to bed.
We all woke up as I was putting my dad to bed so here’s the short version:
Aquilonia and Ebon went to make a totem and Stote snuck along.
Nadja and Name had breakfast and the Name took a cab to the Kettle and Back for his gear.
Ebon found out he is from the Tribe of the great worm (Meh – 8 inches, not so great) and he offered to pay any price for his totem. The shopkeeper peered deep into Ebon’s eyes (in a sole searching way, not a gay way but it still made Ebon uncomfortable). Aquilonia tried to cure Ebon’s soul-afobia and managed to get him through to the answer of…..
… drumroll please…
… wait, the project timeline came first….
… more drum roll …………
….. More drum roll… OMG, what about the price?
They left to the shopkeeper reminding Aquilonia to tell Jeredin not to be a stranger and found Stote giving himself a dagger manicure.
Aquilonia greeted this scene commenting on Stote‘s serious separation anxiety and the7y caught a drey back to the hood.
Nadja was jammin’ to Bob Seger and sliding around in her socks.
Everyone all came back together at the same time.
We’re off to the portal to meet with Mirt.
See you next week. Same Bat Time, Same Bat Channel….
2020-08-29 – Third time’s a charm (Into the DotMM)
Sixth day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. 2 balls (I mean belles). Still don’t know what this all means, but I can count.
After the minutes were read Sam changed his orientation (you decide).
We went back to Ohio (oh no, that was the Pretenders) we went back to the YP.
We were very surprised to find that the regular fare had changed to the ‘Plate Meal’. We weren’t fans and neither were the regulars by the sound of it.
Mirt was waiting upstairs with Three Strings and a round of drinks. Stote was quick to do the math and figured out only moments before Ebon that some of those drinks were intended for us.
Since Nadja and Aquilonia had been the ones to converse with Maxine, Mirt got the skinny from them. As much as Mirt could probably use the skinny he seemed to be aware of the information we had.
He mentioned a ‘Stone of Golar’ and that everyone in Waterdeep was looking for but told us that we needn’t be concerned. He then left a coin for our bonnie waitress (Bonnie {See below}) and bid us good day.
Name introduced Aquilonia to 3St and a discussion of names began. Name was the subject and the brunt of this discussion until 3St excused himself for a moment to speak with Bonnie.
Stote followed and, while he couldn’t overhear, did manage to hide across the street. He observed Bonnie, our little Bonnie,
3St returned and told the tale of his name. Zanathar were after him and the chips were down. He was trying to redeem himself by playing Alice’s Tavern when a string broke. He kept his head and played on with just six. Then another, which increased the challenge. Eventually he finished the song with only three strings remaining on his lute. The mage who had been causing the strings to break was later found at the bottom of a pit. From that the name 3St stuck (not sure how he dodged the name Wizard Slayer)
Stote returned and told the tale of Bonnie who got into taxi Earls Cab 327. He ‘splained about the growth and we prompted him to no avail to get more detail we failed and he Stote sipped his ale.
We bought better wine, some food, and a ‘half-anker’ of ale.
Ezsvele Rosznar bumped into us at the portal before we left. She recognized Nadja from the ‘Lonesome Trotter’. It was interesting that she invited herself along with us. Ostensibly to find her brother Cressendo Rosznar who can be identified by the ring with the Rosznar family crest which contained a ton of detail for a ring (White falcon on a field of blue that said Fly high and and stoop swift)? She said she didn’t know when (two weeks) he went in or what /why/where he was going or seeking. When asked where she could be found she indicated her estate on Thuderstaff way in the north ward or here at the YP.
After advising that Ebon could ‘bring back her brother if he wanted’ and creeping him out with some lash batting and touchy feely stuff, she departed to somewhere, and we observed a brawl had broken out below.
Ebon, ever the cautious one, literally lept to the challenge and weighed into the combat. Although short lived, it was very inspiring.
It rang 4 bells.
Ebon revisited Aquilonia’s idea to talk to Yagra but Stote was dead set on going down on oops, into the portal. Name said we could find Yagra later and Ebon could fondle her for information.
We went down, followed some bloody drag marks to the pillar room. Based on Aquilonia’s feedback we headed south.
Stote snuck down all stealthy like and discovered a dead goblin with a skull crushed. Ebon played ‘Quincy’ and confirmed these findings with a quick autopsy.
We continued down what seemed to be more hallway ‘under construction’ and emerged into a room with a big star err statue. Twas a naked chick with no head. Not that kind, but the other decrapitation.
After some investigation, Nadja was able to determine that the statue may have been an apprentice of Halaster. She determined this through her foot and robe fetish or a 30 history check one of the two.
We left that room and found more hallway. One way was lit with smokeless candles. Stote didn’t think that was enough hallway so he went to find more.
Ebon and Nadja moved to the south to: A: Investigate? B: Get farther from Stote? C: Fondle the candles (Ebon how could you?)?
Aquilonia went down to join the fondling and provide some guidance (how to fondle your candle).
Stote got back just in time for the party to move forward into the candle room (er hallway – sorry forgot where we were and thought that maybe there would be a room). At the end of the hallway, hey at least it ended, was a mirror. As we /Name approached, the mirror shimmered a bit. As fighters don’t know much more than the fact that some of us look really good in mirrors, Name called Aquilonia forward to investigate further.
Aquilonia determined that this was likely one of many portals in the dungeon for moving from one area to another. It was activated by touch. So…Ebon touched it. He heard a voice (Different from the one he heard before in the northern hallways) that said we were not ready to use this gateway.
As this was a dead end, we decided to go back to the door that Stote found when we split the party and we all stopped to admire a naked man with a broken staff.
After detecting that the staff was normal but the alcove was magical. The statue had an inscrption that said ” put some gays me with bronzed visage and secrets shall I reveal “.
We decided we didn’t know George Hamilton but might find him in the future so Stote opened the door.
More Hallway – Yay!
South was less of ‘the more hallway’ so we went thataway and opened a door. Surprise, surprise – a room!
The room appears to have writing on the wall and a 10′ square pit with something moving around inside. After peeking in, we saw a manish thing at the bottom.
It turned out to be Holith Gark who had been thrown into the pit by his party after an argument about party treasure. Guess the other guys won.
So, after checking out the map, a 23 level side view of the dungeon and mountain above, Billy washed his face. Then, we had a big discussion about the food Joe didn’t like and what we could do to trick him into eating them.
Aquilonia determined that the flaming skull represented ‘Skullport’. So…Name pushed it and a voice said, ” Gate access to Skullport is disabled “. It was the same voice Ebon had heard in the halls to the north.
Dying to hear this again, Name pushed the Comet to hear “Gate Access to Stardock from level 16 only “.
With only one bas-relief left, Name felt that maybe Ebon should push his luck and, low and behold, he did! The voice once again advised that we suck “Gate access to Halaster’s tower is available from level 23 only “.
With some minor discussion, we decided to pull up Holith Gark as he promised both his treasure and a map to level 3. He wanted only vengeance on his former colleagues (Copper Stormforge, Midna Talberth, Rex the Hammer). Turns out that Holith was a revenant (Thanks Aquilonia) which is a type of undead.
Since he surged out we almost went to blows but he seemed ok and immediately responded to Nadja‘s query about Jauqim (his deity) and showed us a secret door in the south. So, we put off killing him for a bit.
Stote moved south and located a secret door that led to next week.
2020-09-04
I was too tired so we played Billy’s campaign instead.
Sixth-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. ~5 balls (I still mean belles). Oh, c’mon, what does it mean?
Stote moved through the secret door (after many hand signals) and found another room (now we’re getting somewhere).
He wasn’t that far into the room when he heard something slicing towards him. Twas a bugbear with a javelin. Stote could tell cuz it was sticking out of him. The bugbear also left him a parting wave of just one finger. Ebon laughed so much he almost peed his pants.
Ebon surged into the room and Stote convinced him that the finger was for him. Ebon stopped laughing.
Name moved into the room and threw his torch flawlessly into the area of the bugbear. He notched an arrow and waited.
Aquilonia successfully attacked the wall with a firebolt and smiled slyly when it screamed in pain.
Stote wne to check the area to the south and found stairs.
Nadja was dashing – into the room. But, feeling a bit unnerved by the presence of the room, continued south until she found some hallway.
The bugbears came back around and started poking holes in Ebon with their javelins.
The first one inspired Name to send an arrow at the bugbears. The second took a flamer from Aquilonia.
Then Billy literally peed (Ebon’s was a fantasy pee) and got ready to attack with the barbarian horde (This will end differently for them than the movie Gladiator).
After we find out what crappy shots the goblins are…
Name shoot and missed but said Fuck You (which is how you use inspiration) and took one out with an arrow. He then threatened the goblins with a plentitude of death.
Ebon went to take care of the bugbears. He started by trying his hand at a tummy un-tuck on bugbear number 2 and then decided to let him recover a bit and missed with his second attack.
Aquilonia moved farther into the room and shot the wall for lack of another target.
Stote decided to rush into the fray to help Ebon. Stopped by the wall however, caused him to target one of the goblins and kill it.
Nadja cast some ‘mantle’ spell (either whore’s or crusader’s) that gave an extra challenge for Billy plus an extra d4 of radiant damage for those of us closest to her.
Then Billy had to move like 300 little bastards around and a small bit of damage was done to Aquilonia cuz everyone else on Billy’s team sucks. The bugbears ran away from Ebon but didn’t get far enough. (Out of the frying pan and into the fire (Literally – see Aquilonia below)
Name took aim at the goblins and killed #11 with ease. He rolled poorly for the second one and used inspiration to roll poorly again.
Ebon said “hey, where you guys goin’?” and since the bugbears didn’t answer he ran around the corner and killed one of them.
Aquilonia gave a weather report to both bugbears (Whew what a scorcher) and then moved back.
Stote went blade runner. Blade on goblin 16 and run over to bugbear 1 and blade again.
Nadja tolled the dead and missed and then moved closer to help us out with her mantle.
Since everyone else on Billy’s team had fled, it was easier for him to get back to us.
Name needed two arrows to take out bugbear1 (GD 5’s).
Ebon moved forward and took out the final bugbear and then his braindog attacked. Ebon spanked it and said “bad braindog”
Aquilonia popped around the corner and said, “Cooked braindog” by way of a firebolt.
Stote moved on forward exploring. He saw a dead goblin get pitched into the room. (Okay, really more of a wide hallway. But what did you expect?)
Nadja dashed up wiping brains from Ebon as she passed and entered the same room as Stote.
Name dashed too. But he went south instead.
Ebon ran into the north fat hall room
Aquilonia held her ground but got Holith Gark (The revenant from last week, remember?) to move forward.
Stote moved forward, discovered Ettins (okay, unknown creatures), attacked the ‘unknown creature’ and himself, and missed both. But the situation was inspiring and so he attacked the ‘unknown creature’ and himself again. He was able to fix his targeting before he did damage and then Sir Robined back to a proper hallway.
The ‘unknown creatures’ moved forward and thought 16 times but Stote apparently got confused about how experience works at the same time.
Nadja attempted to donner orders (that’s command in a foriegn language) but the ‘unknown creature did not understand and so, no effect. Maybe she thought it was because he couldn’t hear her, cuz she moved closer.
Billy had more stuff to run so he moved them around while we enjoyed Beethoven’s Goblin Sonata # 3.6.
Name continued the southern circuit but found nothing but death (Rats, stirges, time)
Ebon pondered the mortality of goblins faced with Ettinism and decided valor was the better part of foolishness, charged right past the ‘unknown creatures’, and took pretty massive opportunistic damage, which kept getting on the goblins. So finally, Billy targeted manually and did a little damage| missed him with the star| and went back to Ebon| went back to Ebon.
Aquilonia moved up to find out what all the fuss was about.
Stote snuck in some distance damage and presented the unknown creature with a bird as well.
Ebon urged them to return the damage.
They did return damage, but returned it to Ebon knocking him silly, but not out because of his relentless endurance. Thinking him unconscious, the creature moved on and Ebon found this a great ‘opportunity’ for the creature to get to know his axe a little better. UC2 wasn’t having it and just kept going.
UC1 still had attacks left and took them out on Ebon as well. This time Ebon was not so endeared (Endured)
Nadja moved up and threw some aid Ebon’s way. This gave him a bit of a boost. A bigger boost than I would have given as Billy has bigger AIDs.
Billy had to move the army
Name put two in the ‘ UC2 ‘ for some damage
Ebon saved against death
Aquilonia killed 4 with another scorcher (guess they should have checked with the weatherman).
Stote danced up to ‘ UC2 ‘ and did a little bit, did a little bit of damage to him. But then he made the mistake of sticking around to go for the kill and, when he didn’t get it, the fit hit the shan.
UC1 teed off on Aquilonia and might have killed her but for a quick Shield spell.
Ettin2 moved towards Nadja and she took the opportunity to cast a spell (Spirit Guardians) then get away. The spirits did some good guardianing and slowed Ettin2 while adding some damage. But, when she went to move, Ettin2 got an attack of opportunity too. Oops – damage, but she got away.
The goblins moved in and started attacking everyone doing damage to Aquilonia and then trying to hit Ebon. Since there are zillions of them, they brought down Aquilonia and took a death save away from Ebon as well.
Name took out the two goblins stupid enough to come into range.
Ebon made his Death Save
Aquilonia failed her death save. Yeah – that’s only one Billy.
Stote popped up and shot Ettin2 but still couldn’t take him down.
Ettin 1 came around the corner to see where the arrows were coming from and found Stote. He quickly beat him down.
Nadja gave Stote and Aquilonia ‘Aids’ and they were both ready for more.
Billy went to town with his goblins again and missed Aquilonia (thank god for shield) and missed Ebon (That was inspiring). Throwing in the towel there, they went after Stote and would have critted but Stote was so inspirational, the goblin missed.
Name batted 500 and hit Ettin1 for a little.
Ebon was inspired to make his death save
Billy was not inspired enough to continue and that’s where we ended.
2020-09-12 – Ebon – dead and back again?
I played “Ebon’s Revenge” – and the crowd went meh.
Read in the notes – Stopped for a moment for technical difficulties – Then read in the notes and we’re back in combat.
Halitosis (Ok Haleth) decided he might actually be able to do something and fisted one of the goblins…to death. He might have fisted two, but hey, he’s new at this.
Aquilonia stepped mistily to the south and then sent her servant to pour some wine (or a potion) into Ebon.
Stote then Barnum and Bailey’s right past the Ettin, who seemed pretty limber himself, and managed to get clear.
The ettin did something but my notes crashed.
Nadja was everywhere – her guardians were doing damage, she was still giving people aid(s), and she surged into combat.
Then Billy went and damaged Ebon (again) and Nadja by goblin.
A number of opponents surged into the room from the south (handful of goblins and a couple bugbears) but they seemed to be fleeing someone who sounded a lot like Yagra.?!?
A Zhentarim agent appeared, pursuing the earlier entrants and squared off with one of the bugbears who tried to lie and say we did something wrong. (Name corrected him).
Name then switched to the flame tongue sword and wiped out the first goblin and then clearly outlined the second (missing 4 times).
Ebon laid there (thanks to the stupid goblins)
Halitosis did something.
Aquilonia firebolted a goblin with a solid hit.
Stote blew by and took out Name’s goblin with a single shot (probably because of the great flaming outline and explained to Name “that’s how it’s done.”
Yagra (yep, it was Yagra) moved into the room and laid into the bugbear due to his past crimes. She mentioned something about making him pay for what he had paid for.
The ettin missed Nadja with everything but his spit and she retaliated against him showing him the dark side of her spirituality.
Billy was doing so much I couldn’t keep up. Some damage was exchanged in the south. The goblin kept missing Ebon, and much whiffing was heard to the north. One of the goblins did manage to hit Halitosis but the two that tried Name, failed and fled.
Turns out that the Zhentarim to the south (note the phonetic spelling) killed one of the bugbears and moved on to the other. She, yep, she; was a Drow.
Name moved forward and flame roasted the two goblins who missed him (guess they don’t miss him any more).
Ebon crit failed his death save but has inspiration so we’re fine. What are the odds he would crit fail again? Hmm, guess they’re kind of high.
Aquilonia continued moving her servant forward and roasted a goblin with a firebolt.
Stote gunned down another goblin and drank a healing potion and amazed Billy with his ability to move a heal into the chat and get it to work.
Yagra continued chipping away at the bugbear but felt like he needed a rest this round.
The Ettin decided to show his displeasure for her recent anal attack by killing the shit out of her. He then went after Halitosis and hit him too.
Then Billy continued his combat in the south amongst his NPCs (Guess he really wants to be a player). He got so excited he started killing his own characters.
His northern goblin finally hit Ebon, proving that he could hit the broad side of a corpse.
Halitosis got hit by the goblin facing him who did max damage and still didn’t bring him down.
That cute little Drow killed the other bugbear but it took both her attacks. He shed a braindog who went at the Zhentarim (with a J sound) and…
Name rounded the corner into the room/hall and managed to hit the Ettin once, urging him to face the real threat.
Ebon remained dead.
Halitosis fisted another goblin to death.
Now the braindog got to go and tried to snack on one of the Zhentarim and managed to bring him down.
Aquilonia firebolted the Ettin and had her unseen servant about face the potion to Nadja.
Stote attacked the braindog cuz now we have to bail out the team Billy sent to ‘help’. He yelled out that Ebon might need help.
Yagra lamented the loss of another lover and ran to help Ebon. She half-heartedly lobbed a shot at the braindog but missed without caring as she continued on.
The ettin tagged Halitosis but couldn’t bring him down. (Looks like we found a new tank – sorry Ebon).
Nadja touched herself (very exciting) and healed up some damage. She then crawled away from the ettin but reminded him she was still around by sending her spiritual axe to strike the killing blow.
Billy was down to just three goblins. The first ran away and who knows what the two in the south did.
Name busted a cap in the final goblin’s ass and it seemed all was well with the world.
Halitosis immediately whined about finding ‘the party’ but Name shushed him.
Braindog tried to take over the body of Yagra’s friend but failed.
Stote came up to check on the situation and once we ‘Wolf Blitzered’ him to let him know it was all clear, he went down and killed the brain dog. He called Yagra up to help Ebon and she followed.
Yagra got a bit catty when she saw Aquilonia, but her concern for Ebon spurred her forward(ish).
Nadja went to confirm that Ebon was dead.
Name headed south.
The rest of the party haggled over Ebon’s death and possible restoration.
Yagra cried us a river and her friend introduced herself as Jade. She chatted up Aquilonia quite a bit which caused us all to wonder. Yagra began weeping over the loss of all the people that the Zanathar had killed – especially Ebon.
Name continued south and caught those two goblins in the south. They both tried to attack and flee but only got a little way before Name caught them and burned them to death.
Halitosis caught up and whined about ‘the party’ again but Name chided him for not bringing the rest of the party, so they headed back.
After a bit of poking around, we collected the treasure and started to haul Ebon’s body out of the dungeon.
We stopped by the stairs to promise Halleth we would be right back and we’re oh so sure he’ll wait.
We did stop to admire a statue of a ” and found that there was a circlet of blasting hidden in the base. A little bit of healing later and we all returned to the portal.
There were many groans and some cheers as we arrived as much coin had been bet on Ebon’s demise.
As we went to find the cleric, Nadja showed Aquilonia the spellbook of Ubia (See 2020-05-09) who was a friend.
We took everything we could (including the circlet of blasting, staff of charming, Ubia books and sech and we settled up.
The group headed back to Trollskull Alley inviting Yagra for her concern and Jade for Stote‘s nefarious purposes (although things are looking good for Aquilonia).
Name asked Yagra about her fancy duds and she ‘splained that they were given to her for a funeral. She simply departed the funeral in this garb to seek vengeance for her friend, an actor, who had fallen in with the wrong crowd.
After looking for a temple of Hella for a bit, we decided we would settle for the Plinth – an all faith temple that should fit the bill.
Will it, we’ll find out next week.
2020-09-19 – Back again, again?
Seventh-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. ~12 bells – The notes were read in. Billy didn’t know who Billy was in the last notes so I ‘splained.
We all woke up to discover that Aquilonia went banking and came back with the coin. We headed down to the Plinth to get Ebon back.
Aquilonia communicated with her patron (Wakanda {Forever}) and sent everything to him but got to keep the circlet of blasting.
Conveniently located near the YP, the Plinth was just a quick personal carriage ride away from Trollskull and, since Aquilonia had conveniently reserved one (looks like we’re moving up in her opinion) for us to use.
We got to the salvation army, er Plinth, and Yagra carried Ebon into the Plinth…. and right back out again since apparently we need the ‘real’ temples.
Alexander and Cynthia were a bit challenged by our needs both resurrection and directions. Finally, they sent us to the temple of Reginald (Reggie) and Vanessa Redgrave.
Reggie was quite the character. He had been fired by Hallaster and we offered him both coin and the chance to get a bit of revenge (might as well dream big). He was able to determine (using a bellows) that he was only mostly dead, not partially dead. I know ‘mostly’ sounds worse than partially, but it’s not.
After a bit of discussion betwixt Reggie and Yagra, and Ebon (yep Ebon), and Stote we were almost ready to ‘get her done’ when Reggie asked after the diamond. Well we didn’t have no diamond. We could get one, but we didn’t have one. Fortunately, Reggie’s lovely wife Vanessa pointed out the ‘joke’ and brought Reggie a fine diamond for the ceremony.
Talking with Vanessa we learned that Reggie had been a Blackcloak and was fired buy Hallaster for not being able to bring someone back who dies of old age (which is how Halaster killed a servant with an aging spell). However, Hallaster was furious with Reggie because the dead servant was the only one who could make his Monte Cristo the way he liked. And even though it has been 17-18 years now, the words still stung.
Well, after just a bit, he was ready to go with a chocolate coated pelvic floor that was sure to do the trick. Yagra held him up while the chocolate diamond was shoved down Ebon’s throat. Ebon woke up almost immediately but couldn’t go swimming for at least an hour.
Ebon immediately made Yagra all wet (in the face/with the tears) with his first words. (Something about a ‘night at the opera’ made her feel like a Queen). Vanessa brought out tasty little finger samiches. We all enjoyed them while Nadja threw down a little healing and we got the benefit of a long rest and magi
We did some healing and got the benefit of a long rest, which may have been the magic cheese.
We went back to Aquilonia‘s and decided to hang out for the few days to get rid of Ebon’s reductions. We sent Yagra and Ebon out for a nice meal while the rest of us made a pact not to mention Uktarl (Leader of the Undertakers) and how he died ever again.
Before we know it was 6 bells on Seventh-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. (Ebon at -4) but not on his seduction moves as he and Yagra were having a fine time listening to the Magic Classes sing ‘Mad World’. Yagra was now all wet (not tears and stuff) and leaked her story all over Ebon. How the Xanathar has hurt her friends and how the Zhentarim gave her a way to get revenge while still making a living. She told him about Uktarl and how she was a child of rape and suffered the wrath of the rest of her less rapey siblings.
She was oh so shy when she first got to Wateredeep having fled there for respite. Uktarl helped draw her out of her shell. Ebon was Elvis Presley style suspicious, but Yagra said their relationship was as platonic as the one between Stote and Ebon. (Hmmm)
She further confided how Uktarl helped draw her out of her shell. Turns out, her friends Jade and Rocco, had gotten him into the Undertakers and she was a bit upset with them now but she assured Ebon that overall the Zhentarim, while reputed to be evil, hadn’t been that bad.
Ebon showed that his vagina could get just as wet as he voiced his concern for Yagra and her associations with the group.
Meanwhile – Nadja, Name, Aquilonia, and Stote went shopping and Guitar Center – I mean Riautar’s Weaponry.
Nadja went first and found a Flame-Tongue greatsword she couldn’t afford and we went over to the scratch and dent and managed to pick up a +2 greataxe for 420 with a trade-in.
Name did a bit of bow shopping with Ronnie Riautar (a hottie) who set him up with a bow that had been made by her brother and enchanted by her Grandmother. It was 2k, but she’s a hottie so Name’s buyin. He scored the bow for 100PP and Shatterspike
Stote looked at a really sharp scimitar that cost 50k but demurred.
We got directed to Aurora’s Adventuring Shop, which is just across from the Waterdeep Way Catalogue Counter of the same name.
After talking her into staying open, Stote did some serious boot shopping and checked out a variety of items. He decided that the cloak of displacement was the thing for him. Nadja and Name picked up boots of Elvenkind as well.
We had a brief discussion about the DnD economy and coinage and then found we had more than enough for all of this.
Aquilonia used her influence to get a good deal on a cloak of Protection (You’re welcome Brandi).
Well, nothing beats a day of shopping. See you next week.
Dinner and Dungeons 9/6/20 to 10/31/20 – 6c
2020-09-26 Dinner(s) and an adventure?
..or maybe just dinners. (Adjusted at 8.44 bells – real Time)
Seventh-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. ~8 bells – The notes were read in and Billy was pleased.
We jumped back, what’s that sound, Ebon and Yagra enjoying their meal and continuing conversations about Uktarl and how they listened as he died. Her flashback brought her to tears in public, which caused her some embarrassment, but Ebon calmed her (and the crowd) with the old typical half-orc charm.
It seems they’re a pair made for each other, as Yagra was also somewhat afraid of the monster inside her.
The episode of Twilight Saga “weeping half-orcs” continued for a little while longer. Ebon ended up clownin us to the end (thank god) and we moved back to adventure. (Wanna try out my new stuff). After Yagra indicated that they should go, as they tend to get a little morbid as the night progressed (Obviously Billy hasn’t been listening to this part) and so they departed at about 9 bells.
Ebon brought Yoko (Yagra) back to Trollskull while Stote and Name tried to hawk a little money from the late night passersby. The crowd sucked although Stote and Name’s performances were legendary.
One viewer was notable however as it appeared he was watching without trying to look like he was watching. Name caught a sense for this and tried to chase him down, ostensibly to see the ‘show’ but as he approached, the stranger vanished leaving only his ‘cloak of dry leaves’.
As the cloak finished off its David Copperfield act, Ebon and Yagra appeared coming up the high road. Name’s expression changed from one of shock+anger to one of pleased surprise as he saw the pair.
As they got there, Ebon started to feel the weight of the resurrection and so he and Yagra decided to head back to Trolskull.
Stote and Name were game to go find Jade until they learned that she might be at the MuleSkull Tavern in the docks and he figured that was too far away, so we decided on the Portal.
As soon as the Portal came up, Aquilonia got peckish, and so did Ebon which confused Yagra, but whaddaya gonna do.
Even though Name invited her, Yagra was going to retire, but once Aquilonia forgot all about Nadja (would be nice to have another woman) and Stote did some stunt knifin, she was in. She dropped Ebon like a hot potato and picked up Stote‘s hand like a cold one; we were off to the portal. Since Yagra commented on their invitations, Name commented about his invite being overlooked, but was rewarded with an invitation of his own. Ronnie Riautar showed up behind him and after a brief discussion, joined him in heading to the portal.
Well, the place was crowded and the Last Boys (from port llast) were jammin on the second floor stage. There was a ‘stew’ available and a couple tables as well, but Name’s gotta make an impression so the coin changed hands and the VIP section was obtained for the low low price of 5G.
Captain … was there and returned our greetings warmly but his head was elsewhere (in a buxom {that’s right Joe buxom} woman’s chest) so we moved on.
Everyone pretty much went for the stew but Name, looking to impress, checked for other options. Appears that bread and cheese was the only add-on and, since Ronnnie was ok with the stew, we moved on. Then Aquilonia asked for the ‘cooter’ board and found out that it smelled bad. So Aquilonia, Name, and Ronnie, angled for the finer dining establishment. (8.44 Bells) before they could depart, Stote ordered 7 shots of the strongest liquor available and toasted Yagra’s timely arrival and Ebon’s return. We all drank and then dun dun duh – split the party.
The trio headed to the Sleepy Sylph for a finer meal and the waiter welcomed them and went to get the wine.
Meanwhile – Yagra was glad that Ebon was eating and commented that maybe he could do that to her later (not really) that it would help bring back his strength. While Ebon thanked her, he also ordered a round of Lycanthrope Moonshines. Checking to confirm that Yagra would have one as well.
Ebon happened to notice Yagra was distracted and advised Stote to check things out. Stote thought he meant, check Yagra out, and so he threw the eye her way. While watching her, he happened to notice that she was eyeing something in the main tavern and moved out of the VIP to check things out. As his eyes roamed the room, he caught sight of…. the group from port last. They threw Yagra the stink-eye but nothing further. Stote caught them at the bar and went into his friendly drunk routing. They seemed nonplussed.
Meanwhile – back in the VIP area, Nadja and Ebon were catching on as well. While Nadja made some jokes at Stote‘s expense to cheer her up, Yagra explained that … were members of the Zanithar guild.
Meanwhile – Back at Sylph – Ronnie already had what she wanted (but Name talked her into the Cheese Platter together with the Bread and Dripping). Aquilonia had the Cheese platter as well while Name ordered the fish.
Meanwhile – Back at the portal, Stote was trying to get in good with our new ‘friends’ and pushed, as he usually does, right to the edge. Fingers were pointed and soft words exchanged.
Stote wandered back to the VIP while … hurled insults at his back. I missed a bit here due to talking with my dad about football reruns.
Meanwhile – Yagra ‘splained to Nadja that Krentz and she had a history and some killin’ may be needed. Nadja said she had her back and the group began to assemble. Yagra urged the group to go, Ebon picked up on the vibe, and his penis guided him out. As Ebon left, Stote and Ebon exchanged longing glances that seemed to say so much and then, they were gone…
Meanwhile – back in the VIP, Stote reminded Nadja of her drumming lessons, but Nadja didn’t recall how good he had been with his stick. They decided to depart with a parting gift for the PlastBoys (New name) and headed back to TrollSkull.
Meanwhile – it seems the menu back at the Slyth was somewhat ‘loaded’ as were some of Name’s questions as he kept the balls (figuratively) in the ladies’ courts. Suddenly, Aquilonia had to pee. When she did, she noticed someone in Lard’s Garb. The figure seemed to be wearing Mirt’s amulet. Guess it was.
Meanwhile – back at the table – Aquilonia informed Name of the lord, Name worked to catch his eye, and they exchanged ‘nods. Name sent over a 25Gp bottle of wine, which caused Ronnie to comment on the deal she gave earlier. (Name promised to work it off) Desert was ordered and the meal progressed to its natural conclusion. Franz got tipped well and advised to give us the ‘desert level of service’ next time.
We headed back to the YP to get the group and with some incredulity listened as Durnan explained the others had already left. We headed out to the Waterdeep night. Name had some challenges remembering where he was from but we moved on and dropped off Aquilonia, headed back to Ronnnies and did what comes naturally. Unless Billy says she’s freaky (he did) so we did what comes unnaturally. It’s ok though cuz baby got some money. Name can quit and become a kept man)
Meanwhile – Stote and Nadja got back ok without being followed (or at least without detecting it).
The night passed without incident…
Eighth-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. ~8 bells…
Morning has broken, like the eight morning (of 5th Krythorn)…
Nadja has new spells. Aquilonia has new spells.
Ebon now only -3 – Leaves with Aquilonia and Nadja (after stocking up on bacon) and goes to check on the token. While still somewhat sketchy regarding the place, after some coaxing to go in, the proprietor “Olmhazan” greeted Aquilonia and Ebon with happy tidings. He also had the amulet completed with some awesome features.
Ebon was told many secrets that he can’t remember, including the secret word that will change him back from a totemic rage to regular.
So, drop that adventure word from the title…
When we meet next week, it will be the 11th hour (I mean the Eleventh-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. ~? bells…
2020-10-03 – How many damn bells?
Eleventh-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. ~ Billy won’t tell me how many frickin’ bells!
As dawn is breaking, we find Ebon and Yagra lounging about troll skull in pajama pants. Yagra might be feelin a little ‘sumpin sumpin’ but Ebon just kept playing with his token. This excited Yagra so much that she offered to go down on Ebon…oh, go down with Ebon. There was a bit of vaginal haggling, while Ebon considered things (almost all in Ebon’s head).
As the two headed down, they tried to sneak up on Stote but failed. They then tried to spring over to attack him, but, due to a ‘high-anus’ use of inspiration, was able to avoid the attack and touch Ebon’s ass.
Meanwhile – Name, Nadja, and Aquilonia are discussing how to keep things fresh and it turns out Aquilonia has a hotpoint refrigerator (literally).
We finished off breakfast, funded restocking, and headed to the YP.
The place was pretty torn up and Durnan explained that some trolls came up and some Zhentarim not only didn’t help but hindered as well. Ebon offered to help (kill things) and Durnan acted impressed. Too bad he’s not an actor.
So down we went (Durnan gave us one trip on the house).
The bugbear smell is gone, but the hallways are still all there.
Stote leads the way sneaking up on several (hallways) hiding behind doors. One looked a bit like an old woman’s vjay-jay (Dusty and weird lookin’). One had some far off chanting.
We found some moldy bones and another skeleton hanging from manacles. It looked like the writing was on the wall for them, but since nobody speaks whatever language it’s written in, we’ll never know.
We continued through that door and found a small room with two pillars holding up an archway. As Stote went to cross the room, he vanished into the portal. Ebon quickly reached after him (tried to) to save him. He caught something (we’re not sure yet) but what it was, was…
Meanwhile Aquilonia recalled a fair amount of information for this error and was able to provide some guidance. This was in time to save Ebon but not Stote who seemed to be invisible.
Stote snuck forward to help Billy test his sound and heard the chanting again. As we approached, we couldn’t detect any Eau de bugbear but the chanting of nimraith continued over and over.
As Stote snuck forward, Ebon was interested in a door he had passed. This set off a bout of ‘look over here/no look over here/no look over hear’, until a couple bugbears showed up and cried out “Intruders!”.
This caused everyone to roll initiative and Billy to try to find Yagra’s character. After the world ended for a moment but was then restored, we were ready to go.
Stote held off for the opportunity to sneak up.
Nadja cruised around the corner, her knowledge of the situation provided by Name, and held out for her opportunity to help.
Aquilonia popped off some Magic Missiles and got things rolling.
The bugbears attempted to retaliate but that’s when all those held actions kicked in.
Stote got things started with a double attack that took a fair amount of fight out on one of them.
When that bugbear went to pursue Stote, Ndja took him out with a crossbow.
It seemed like we would be good to go until the room (probably a hallway) to the north belched out a baffling number of goblins. (Guessing that one of them is nimraith) They did a pretty effective job of stabbing their way around the group getting a little bit of just about everyone.
After the tiny little avalance was over Yagra took out one with her mace (guess she got it from her rape kit) and then wounded one of the others.
Name charged in and cindered one of the goblins, but even as inspired as he was he could not hit the second.
Stote whacked the Brain dog who went unconscious momentarily due to some fake damage earlier.
The brain dog recovered and tried to devour Ebon’s intelect, but had some trouble finding it. (He saved)
Nadja found that this end of the hall apparently generated terrible rolls because she too could not hit a simple goblin regardless of how inspired her attack was.
Aquilonia scorched a couple goblins and the bugbear
The bugbear retaliated by removing Aquilonia‘s ability to scorch anything by knocking her unconscious with his morning star.
Ebon went all kinda kooky and just started killin the heck out of everything (Yay Rage!)
Then the goblins got to go and even though the first one attacked, the rest of them tried to flee not caring what opportunities they gave to the party.
Ebon quickly reminded them that they should care.
One of them poked a little at Name proving the bad roll curse at our end of the hallway only affects the PCS.
Some more fled and others rushed in. Steve regaled us with a tale of good goblin interrogations from the show Community. The rest of the goblins continued to flee until it was time for Yagra to try to thin the herd.
Yagra managed to take one out with two attacks, which made it seem like the hallway curse was lifting.
Name proved that theory incorrect only scoring one hit out of 4 attempts.
Stote seemed to be doing better getting hits with both bow attacks.
Suddenly, a brain dog appeared and tried to devour Aquilonia‘s intellect but it was too big to be devoured (oops, body thief).
Nadja didn’t like that so much so she threw some HP back to Aquilonia.
Aquilonia went all Taylor Swift
Ebon hit the brain dog soooo hard that a goblin that left a while ago died. We’re pretty sure Billy resurrected it just for spite, but it was dead 🙂 Unforkunately, it didn’t kill the brain dog so Ebon stayed around to hit it again. He then ran north, Ms.Tessmacher, north. He was running so fast that he ran right past a goblin.
The goblins continued to scatter.
Yagra went to check on Aquilonia and once she confirmed her okay-ness, she took off after Ebon.
Name headed south and was attacked by a bunch of guys named Matt. (Okay, just a roomful of mats)
Stote ran off to the North yelling instructions to Aquilonia and insults to Ebon.
Nadja threw a bit more healing to Aquilonia and ‘splained to her what had happened.
Ebon went hunting more hallway and was quite successful.
Things wound down pretty well and Name collected a goblin guide to tell us what was going on around this place.
See you next week..
2020-10-10 – No Bells down here
Eleventh-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. ~ Based on complaints from last week, I am pretty sure we won’t get any bells down here. (Oops – forgot that Stote was invisible)
Stote came back hoping to see heaps of dead goblins but tempered his disappointment long enough to ask Yagra “Which way did dey go, which way did dey go?”. Getting the finger (of direction) from Yagra, he headed north to make sure the goblins hadn’t taken off with all the good hallway – they hadn’t. He pinged with a dagger to see if he could startle them into giving away their position but instead proved that he was #1.
Nadja gave one of her precious healing potions to Aquilonia and mentioned oh so coyly that we should remember to get a bunch more of these before we venture back onto the Portal.
Aquilonia went to check on Name (awww) and seeing him to be fine, went to find the group to the north.
Ebon was flying down the room (oops hallways) and caught up to Stote so that Stote could explain that he had found…you guessed it…more hallway! This set had some alcove (that’s new) with mirrors in them. One was heavily stoned. Ebon found a dagger (Stote‘s) and a burned out torch (???) and he reported these treasures back to Stote. As he was turning back around, he saw himself… literally. He kicked his own ass once and fought off panic as well.
The goblin didn’t do much except hold his action waiting for Name.
Yagra moved around the corner to help Ebon and was surprised to find that she might have the opportunity for a threesome with two Ebons. She took no other action than moistening.
The other Ebon wasn’t as distracted however, but rather than attacking Ebon with his axe, he gave Ebon the finger (of weakness). This not only caused Ebon’s flesh to rot but there was shrinkage as well.
Stote gave it his best shot (ok, not really his best shot) but did hit with an arrow and then he ran off to find more hallway.
Nadja ran up the hall. Not quite as quickly as I thought she could, but running nonetheless. She paused only for a moment to confirm that the party was farther north, but it did cost her 5 precious feet.
Aquilonia followed hot on her heels.
Ebon (ours not the dupe) chopped up the reflected opponent who melted away to smoke. Since there was nothing left to fight, he continued to admire himself in the next set of mirrors but with a lot more caution this time.
Yagra cautiously approached Ebon, wondering if the loss of strength might also unfortunately result in a loss of vigor.
Name came forward with the goblin who is apparently related to Wrong-way Harrigan, so we lost some distance there.
Stote found the first room for a bit but did not celebrate. Instead, he returned to the party and as soon as Nadja caught up, we went back to normal action.
That only lasted for about two seconds but then Ebon triggered another mirror and we were back in combat.
Stote went first and one-shotted the new opponent (oh good, the bragging will never end). That killed the opponent and the combat as well.
That didn’t stop Name as he engaged with the mirror to the north. His torch was no good, but an arrow cracked it.
Ebon and Stote started to play with the alcoves and generated a little Stote. We’re back into combat.
Stote goes first and one-shots another. We’re back out of combat.
Name took out another mirror and got ready for the next one.
Ebon peeked around the corner and Bill revealed more ariola. While there was nothing to the South, there was something that needed killing to the North. While he didn’t see it in his peripheral vision, he did manage to catch it in the reflection in the mirror to the South. Fortunately, Ebon killed this one quickly so we didn’t have to do the whole in and out.
Stote volunteered to do something stupid and didn’t even bother to ask Ebon to hold his beer. He smacked Ebon on the ass (some would argue cupped) and then ran down the hallway. And…we’re back in combat.
Well, now we remembered Stote is Invisible.
Since Stote can’t help too much, he moved forward.
Name, not being aware of the danger yet, killed another mirror (north) and found a hidden space behind an illusory mirror (South).
The creature started to kick the shit out of Ebon and I reminded Bill that Aquilonia got skipped so he held his guys off and let her proceed.
Aquilonia used MM to injure three of the smokey-Stotes.
Bill went back to kickin’ Ebon’s butt.
The goblin tried to flee, but Nadja took the opportunity to hold him there.
Nadja told the goblin to stay put but didn’t worry enough to make sure and moved forward to “destroy undead”. They were not destroyed.
Ebon, in his weakened condition, raged, but found himself starting to have trouble holding up his end of the axe as well as trouble hitting.
Yagra, on the other hand, had no trouble hitting. She just had trouble doing good damage. (Maybe she was weakened empathetically) but she did do some damage.
Stote disengaged and tried to pop one with an arrow, but missed. He used his movement to try to draw one away.
Name charged in to show off his skills as a shitty roller missing at first and killed one with inspiration and used his action surge to help miss the second one twice.
Aquilonia MM’s again and took out mambo #5.
Bill started his round of kicking ass, and continued to avoid the shitty roll bug. The dupes missed Stote but managed to take Ebon down. He moved on to Yagra taking down her strength but with Ebon down, she won’t need it anyway. He moved on to Name and critted him and took a point of strength there as well.
The goblin tried to take off again and Aquilonia took the opportunity to kill the crap out of it.
Nadja gave Yagra, Ebon, and Name ‘aids’ and a little haggling later, we moved on.
Ebon sprang (maybe rusty springed) back into action and tired to kill the one behind him but Bill argued with him. After some ‘splanations, Ebon Mahomese’d the guy behind him.
Yagra still wanted to cut her way through to Ebon (even though he wasn’t looking too good just now) but she managed to do some damage.
Stote switched to blades and asked his opponents to say hello to his little friends. His opponent did, but only partially.
Name , seeming to finally be rolling better to hit, needed to inspire himself to do just a bit more damage. Bill allowed it and dupe 8 went down. He kept his streak going and leveled Duplicate 7 as well.
Aquilonia was reminded of the need to take the warcaster feat. However, as she moved into the hallway, using MM along the way. She took out dupe 4.
Bill got to try to dupe us again but missed Stote. This must have angered him cuz he critted Ebon again and there goes Ebon and some more of his strength again.
Nadja was a veritable ‘Beacon of Hope’ for Aquilonia, Name, Ebon, Yagra, and herself.
Yagra must’ve felt that Ebon’s looks were improving cuz she dragged him into an alcove (guess we should give them a little privacy).
Stote, with much charm, killed dupe2.
Name closed out the combat with a crit, which Bill tried to upsell. However, I sang a song of combat that made him laugh until his eyes watered.
A wealth of healing happened with Nadja‘s beacon leading the way.
Stote guided most of the party to the safe room while Aquilonia and Name finished off the mirrors. They found a bronze mask (later determined to be of Halaster) hidden on one of the shelves that existed behind three of the mirrors. The mask reminded Name of something we had seen and Aquilonia helped him remember the statue we had found where there was a broken pole and a statue. The inscription by the statue had said “Gaze upon me with bronzed visage and secrets shall I reveal.”
Stote in the meantime, wanted to try a little entranced watch, but it didn’t seem to work that way. Stote still offered to take the lion’s share of the watch once he was done with his trance.
Aquilonia and Name rejoined the party in the north.
Bill hinted that it might be near 12 bells – so we managed a short rest.
Ebon started to regain some of hit hit points by using one hit dice during the short rest.
Then we called the ball until next week.
2020-10-17 Steve H is inspired to blow something
Eleventh-day, 5th Krythorn, 1492 DR. – 12-ish bells. (Ok closer to 1 bell)
After a short rest – we’re strong again. Yagra sees the color return to Ebon’s cheeks and is happy again.
We discussed the merits of strategy vs stunts and decided to head south and ‘gaze upon him with bronzed visage’.
Stote went flyin’ down the hall until Billy pulled him over for speeding. We moved quickly and unerringly to the spot where we thought the statue was (Ok we knew cuz billy let that cat out of his bag). As we arrived, there was some debate about how to share both the Fantasy grounds screen and sound for Bruce.
The secret is to share notepad on the sound system and then, after confirming sound, close notepad. Then the other user can share their screen (and additional sound if needed).
Yagra and Ebon stayed a bit behind (maybe the well-hung statue has some effect on her).
We figured out that Nadja had the mask and so she was stupid enough to put it on and face fatty big dick. She was transported to a 30×30 room with a half-staff (not that kind) on the floor near the misty portal that she entered through. There was also a portrait of Halaster and the Halaster himself seated in a throne.
Halaster seemed to notice her presence and said “Don’t just stand there you boob (guess he realized she was female) ask me three questions and I will answer them. Two of my answers will be true and one will be false.”
Nadja asked “” Halaster, are you still alive and in the dungeon of the mad mage? – Halaster answered – blah blah blah – C’mon how detailed do you think these recaps will be?
Meanwhile…The rest of the party tried various options to figure out where she had gone.
Meanwhile…. Nadja asked where the mirror at the end of the hallway wnet and Halaster choked out something.
Nadja‘s third question was about home decoration, which Halaster answered. She returned
Ebon was next. He saw all of the same things but found only a steaming pile of something sitting in the chair. Ebon was angry – not as potent in his rage as he might have thought, but angry nonetheless. He came out all upset and talked about killing Halaster. Yagra showed him what the phrase potent anger means.
Name went next and found about the same thing as Ebon. He threw in the towel and left the room.
Aquilonia did a little detecting and found the statue and mask were both magical (go figure) and so she will take the mask back to her ‘guy’.
Ebon stormed/stalked off pretty upset with the fact that Yagra sided with Halaster, or maybe just mad that Halaster one-upped him, but either way it sounded like some whiney Peter Parker backstory shit. 😉
Ebon went walking off down the hall and intercepted two bugbears who had been coming to see what our commotion was all about and surprised Ebon as he rounded the corner. They attacked Ebon who seemed happy about the whole thing so… initiative, wait, not yet, ok now.
Stote took off like a shot and went all the way down to where Ebon was and drew steel.
Nadja went running down the hall to diggy diggy hole.
Aquilonia followed, but far more daintily.
The bugbears decided to split their attacks between Ebon and Stote but both whiffed (Yay cloak of displacement).
Ebon then got to rage far more effectively than he did in the room, hitting twice and really not improving the bugbear’s general demeanor.
Name wnet jogging down the hall as well (I know, but I needed a different verb).
Yagra brought up the rear but must have thought a rape was in the offing cuz she pulled out her mace.
Stote then took out his opponent and moved over to Ebons for the killstealer, but just inflicted a bit more damage.
Nadja rounded the corner and finished off the last opponent.
Ebon headed angrily north to find an unusual…hallway. He continued on.
Name searched the dead for goodies and found 32 whole silver.
The group moved to watch both the door and the wanderers.
Nadja tried to set a honey trap but wasn’t successful at first.
Ebon rounded the corner and saw Noel Coward hiding behind a table (Oh, some small cowards).
Nadja finished with her trap and she and Aquilonia headed up to join the group. They both stopped when they saw what might be a glory hole and the ladies went to check it out. They decided to use the glory hole to open up a secret door to reveal…more hallway. They closed things back up and followed along.
The goblins took off with Ebon in hot pursuit – guess it really was the popo.
Since NOBODY CALLED OUT ANYTHING, Aquilonia continued up the hall at normal speed.
Name had some insight into the chase and so ran after Ebon. Even though he was moving pretty quickly, his straight eye for the queer looking wall revealed an odd spot on the wall.
Stote followed suit but remembered to yell some shit out so everyone was aware of …something. He quickly moved down the hall and, rounding the corner, shot a goblin in the back and killed it.
The goblins took off like nobody’s business after the leader (Admiral Ackbar) yelled out “It’s a trap” and avoided Nadja‘s honey pot.
The ladies continued forward, Yagra with a bit of urgency.
Ebon whipped a warning javelin at the goblins, but took time to admire the architecture to the south.
Aquilonia continued forward, this time at a higher speed (Thanks Stote) and Nadja followed.
Name, rounding the corner and seeing the goblins in full flight wanted to discover some hallway of his own for a change and was easily able to do so.
Stote moved up to the door and lied to the goblins from a distance.
The goblins proved they did not believe him by continuing to hall ass. Hell, they ran right out of combat.
So, we looked to the north and saw – dun dun duh, a room! This odd room with alcoves to the east and west and a big penis, er obelisk in the northeast corner. The obelisk proved that those goblins can get pretty handsy.
Ebon moved into the room and saw a bunch of junk
Aquilonia moved forward and confirmed the odd spot on the wall was a secret door.
Name moved forward and continued checking out hallways.
Nadja got tired of running and moved to join us but stopped by the opening with the dead laying about.
The rest of the folks went to check out the penis room. Nadja joined them and the whole gang tried to figure out the penis. After a bit, Aquilonia figured out maybe they should touch the penis which Ebon was quick to do. In his head he heard “I cast my eye into the future and see in yours a perilous descent. South of here, beyond a secret passage, waits the Two-Headed King. Look to his left. There you will see the path you are destined to take.” This immediately reminded him of the ettins who tried to remove his ability to hear things in his brain by turning it to mush.
Name continued south while all the penis fun was unfolding and, as he entered the revenant room saw a large humanoid figure. Upon seeing what seemed to be spell-casting actions, Name ran and yelled.
The smarter folks in the party had figured out that the two headed reference was the status we saw by the stairs (Hmm “path you are destined to take”… pretty weak divination).
Nadja took the opportunity to heal Ebon up a bit.
The party came to find him and he perfectly explained what was up with hand gestures and Bill’s voice.
Moving forward we continued back towards the way we came until we found the creature staring at the north wall. He noticed us and so…initiative.
Ebon charged ahead (tanks for the memories) and went with the javelin. Pokey mon Joe!
The shield guardian (yep, we can see the name), continued to ‘fake cast’.
Name shot it twice (well once) but then got inspired to hit the second time.
Aquilonia gave us some extra information, while challenging to use, to target the amulet. She cast firebolt and missed it.
Nadja managed to toll the dead on the guardian for 1 whole point of damage.
Aquilonia then got inspired to change her original attack to a MM. This destroyed the amulet and ended the evening.
Well – off to next week.
2020-10-24 – No clever title
Well, I missed a bunch of stuff getting dinner. Thanks Steve for the processor tip. Joe gave me a run down.
Hallway with shields, symbol of B-something, maybe a portal?
No, everything is not 10×10. Some discussion on this and then Stote rudely interrupted to see Zebra (Who’s behind the door).
Door number 2 – nothing Door number 1 – Running water. Stote chose wetness. Rats! Not, I mean really big rats. I’m not talking elephant sized, but certainly dog sized.
While Ebon and Stote were debating size (sure, Stote can yack about size, but I go get one little sandwich and he doesn’t let Ebon and I talk about 10x…. Oops, surprise, the rats attacked. If Stote wasn’t surprised by the rats per se, he was certainly surprised that he got bit.
So, we decided to do the rat catcher’s job the way it should be done. Stote knew that they are easier to catch when they’re dead, so he killed two.
Name, seeing how it was done, killed another but his second target turned out to be a bit more durable.
Everyone else (ok, Aquilonia and Nadja) did the hustle …down the hallway.
Then Rats! Got to attack. Name – missed | Ebon – Hit | Name – missed | Rest of rats ran about the place | Ebon – Lyc hit
Ebon – whiffed, the first time, and even though Name tried to inspire him, he could not. He hit with his second attack but did not have the greater weapons master feat and so did not score a kill.
Yagra brought up the rear and shot the really big rat with her crossbow.
Stote had to hop up into the air, then fling a dagger from the back of the pack, but it looks like he’s part rabbit cuz he got the hit. He had no other dagger, but managed to find a bit of bread to munch on to pass the time.
Name killded the big rat and then a little rat and then another little rat However…
It is not possible in a single action to go from one two handed weapon to another. Please remember this.
Aquilonia seemed to like the idea of the ratatouille and firebolted one.
Nadja followed up with a little more disco and ‘rang his bell’. – To death
Then the wererat’s wife showed up, and boy was she surprised. She begged for peace and mercy and Name ‘assured’ her that things were fine. He stepped aside to allow her to deal with Yagra, who said she was a member of the Zanathar and even named her as Sylvia Featherstone.
While Name cried out for peace, (yeah sure) Yagra shot the lady rat with a bolt, which seemed to do little to no damage.
Stote, suckin up to his bro’s lady, shot her with an arrow but was unjustly robbed of his sneak attack damage and so just did a bit of damage.
Name , proving he could lie as well as any wererat attacked. He did not kill on the first attempt or the whiff that followed, but he was inspired to finish things off with a final attack. This made the rats a little miffed.
Aquilonia tried to BBQ one with a firebolt but did just the one point of damage.
Nadja went the other way and spared the dying on Sylvia – wait, what?
This launched a narrative about Luke the fag and Steve getting fucked in the eye or something like that.
Ebon tried to figure out how to navigate the maze of rats (hmm, is that what they mean by rat maze?) he solved this by killin’ any rats that made up the maze and moved west.
The Nadja got inspiration for never pulling a Steve H.
Yagra squished the final rat and then we can ask Nadja why the hell she spared Sylvia.
Nadja ‘splained that she spared her from absolute death for information she might have.
There was a bunch of debate about the good and bad in everyone and whether or not Sylvia was, at heart, ‘a good person’.
Stote didn’t care and went to check out the room to the north and saw a tremendous amount of detail even though he left quickly due to the Princess Leia (fabulous smell).
Name headed up and looked a bit longer but feared some weird Dutch oven event when the fountains stopped running and he heard gas. He left it to Ebon to finish up the inspection. (Guess Stote was right about that mom’s cooking crap). He went back, searched the bodies, and found a couple daggers for Stote and a beholder coin, which he tossed over to Yagra.
Ebon was puzzled by the lack of water in the fountains and called Nadja in to check out the sludge. They spent a bit of time and a charge of the wand-de-secrets, but found nothing except really bad smells.
Stote moved off down the hall to the east (yep, back to halls) and found many dwarven statues.
Name followed and, seeing none of them came to life and attacked Stote, continued to follow Stote
Stote got to the end of the hallway and determined that it only held those dwarven statues and disappointment (for Stote)
Nadja, in the meantime, had the good sense to search for secret passages and so she and Ebon smelly pants searched some, Name searched one and Aquilonia breezed up the hall and pointed a trigger out to Stote who quickly used it to open a secret door (sans fireballs).
As the group collected at the turn, Name was still seriously checking out one of the statues, and Ebon and Stote moved on.
Name slid into what turned out to be a short hallway (of course) to keep an eye on the two ahead of him just in time to see them turn the next handle.
Aquilonia asked if we heard some kind of angry wind noise (tornado, etc.). Since we hadn’t, Ebon and Stote got to work on the door.
They got the door open a bit but found it difficult to move and there was some foggy bottom guy on the other side of the door.
Even though Stote was buffeted by the storm, when Ebon asked if he wanted to shut it, Stote misunderstood and surged ahead. He did a bit of damage and then surged behind (Ebon that is).
Aquilonia, readied a spell for when the creature made the corner.
The Air Elemental (combat tracker, Bill, combat tracker) blew through the doorway and focused his blows (pun intended) on Ebon.
As soon as it rounded the corner however, Aquilonia‘s spell went off with some good damage.
Not enough to kill it however, which didn’t bode well for Stote who was blown away by the AE’s next attack.
Name went in for two attacks and hit with both. He used a free-action to discuss the merits of rage with Ebon.
Nadja cast some protection spell that everyone kept secret.
Yagra dropped her ‘near dead’ weight and laid into the air elemental. Got a crit – woohoo – did shit damage with it – boo hoo.
Ebon swung his axe through the air, heaping damage onto the blowhard.
Stote took the AE out with his first attack and showed us all how to break wind.
Name noted that that was how it smelled.
Ebon continued into the room and found a bunch of broken and battered stuff.
Everyone started to feel a might peckish, but rather than run all the way back to the portal (which Name agrees is a good idea, Stote) we push forward.
Name considered picking up Sylvia for Yagra (and also because he’s contemplating offing her) but since nobody seemd interested he just leaves her and heads up into the room, yes room, that the AE came from. It’s filled up with busted shit.
Ebon watched the north hallway while Name checked the door to the NE. Name found more hallway (of course) but also some stairs.
Ebon hadn’t really had enough hallway, so he headed down a bit to see more of the same.
Name ‘knew’ the squiggle hall would end where we’d been so he (and Stote and Ebon) sprinted to the end and back (Name feeling a little like anyone who competes against usain bolt, but he eventually made it back to the party. Stote quickly ended any debate about whatever we were debattin’ by listening at one of the doors.
Opening the door, we found a room, a ROOM! Maybe this mage isn’t so mad after all.
The room, yes room, had some large shelves in the far wall that, on closer inspection, turned out to be like crypt slabs (7x3x4).
The room (I was right, we’re findin’ rooms now) was very similar to the first except one of the slabs held an elf skeleton and some mundane gear. But still, it’s a room!
Since we’re so excited to find rooms, we decided to stop in celebration.
Next week we start …in a room!
2020-10-31 Sad Halloween
The date is Second-day, 12th Kythorn, 1492 DR – unknown bells
While we started out in a room, it quickly turned to hallway again. Stote snuck forward and found a door which he quickly opened. The group held its place outside the room so we could not see the detailed frescos or basin with spigot that Stote had found.
After a bit of debate, we got Ebon to take a shower.
Then my dad had a problem with the TV but nobody noticed I was gone. (Seems like he washed up a bit, but I was gone.)
We had all headed south and got back to where the goblins had been hiding. Since I was gone, I could not warn them that something must be down there that was killin’ stuff cuz of the bodies at the opening.
Stote snuck forward and found anal penises (Grick) hiding down the hall. They slimed him and he cried out to the rest of the party.
Ebon responded by kicking the crap out of one of these (that Stote didn’t know what they were)
Name raced forward, vaulting over Aquilonia and Nadja but getting stuck at the Yagra chokepoint. He held his move
The anal penises were so upset they were climbing the walls. They missed all the way around.
Stote sprang to his feet and, even though his scimitars did not seem to have full effect, his second attack critted and got the job done.
Aquilonia and Nadja moved in unison down the hall but had to hold up at the chokepoint.
Bill moved Yagra forward (and Name by default) and that left enough room for Nadja to move into the room. Yagra seemed to have some knowledge of the Grick, as Name recalled reading about them as well.
Yagra’s knowledge didn’t help her hit, so we moved back to Nadja and Aquilonia who moved forward.
Aquilonia tried with a firebolt but wasn’t feeling the bbq vibe.
Ebon wanted to save some for Name so he missed ‘on purpose’. Name showed his gratitude by killing the shit out of ‘G-Morty’ (Stote has already killed ‘g-rick’).
We decided to continue in the hopes of finding a room instead of more hall. Ebon a bit confused at which way Stote had gone, headed in the right direction and off we went.
Suddenly, Stote discovered more Grick. He shot one and faded away.
Name shot the sheriff (if that’s who Grick #4 is)
Ebon moved forward and back (wait your turn man)
And the Gricks went wild! 1 and 2 missed Name , 3 missed Stote and 4 ran. 5 moved forward but didn’t get there in time.
Aquilonia came into the fray MM’in some shit.
Nadja Jeffersoned and whipped out her spiritual weapon but whiffed.
Ebon danced around Grick 3 and critted him on the way by leaving death in his wake. He thought about moving farther but decided instead to simply kill Grick#2.
Yagra moved into the room
Stote then shot the deputy (Grick 2) – to death
Name missed a bunch of shit the first attack but then killed the shit out of Grick #1
Grick 5 ran/slithered away
Nadja moved into the room and heard crying behind a door. Her cries to silence them, worked.
Ebon moved into the room and closely observed the door. He decided to open it and found a tiny man in a closet.
Stote moved forward and shot a fleeing Grick.
Name reversed direction and headed back the other way.
The little man started to come out of the closet to Ebon but Ebon cautioned him not to be too fast.
The LM ‘splained himself a bit.
The rest of the group crowded around to help him come out. Aquilonia and Nadja lent a trusting ear.
After some introductions Nadja found Kelim was part of a party called the Fine Fellows of Daggerford.
Much haggling and pissing about occurred before Stote and Name got to go.
Stote kept going down the hall and found a secret door, the fleeing Grick, and super Grick (Guess it’s time to head back) {Super grick is in hot pursuit}.
Name continued down the halls.
The rest of the party finally figured out that something was wrong in the hall and left Kelim in the closet and took his book.
Stote took a stab at the super-grick and then booked up.
Super-grick attacked and did some significant damage to Ebon.
Name made his way forward and ended up in a room with a mummy on the ceiling.
Then the gricks went
Then Aquilonia disengaged and retreated with Misty Step and firebolted near the supergrick.
Nadja used spiritual weapon to stir up the air around supergrick and then was inspired to stir the air some more.
Ebon was the next to go with a couple of excellent choppy-choppy’s to the supergrick. One was a crit.
Yagra, seeing her source of penis at risk, sort of went into a rage on her own and began attacking the regular gricks.
Stote shot that poison arrow into the super grick and then stayed away from his friends (no wait, that’s what he yelled)
Supergrick (now know to be a grick alpha) {Yes Sam, I like super-grick better too} attacked Ebon, but Ebon was inspired to double dutch that shit. Unfortunately, super-grick had more in store and managed to take Ebon down, but not out.
Name, seeing the open secret door continued on.
The gricks attacked Yagra (since her boyfriend wasn’t stopping them); they almost got her to the ground as well.
Aquilonia heated things up with Aganazzar’s scorcher and Nadja finished things off with Spiritual weapon.
Then the healing began.
Turns out the book that Kelim had was a spell book that went to Aquilonia.
We all went to check out ceiling mummy. Name was going to rope the throne, but his aim was off. However, the rope seemed to stay up there anyway.
Aquilonia detected that there was some magic effect around the throne that may have been affecting the rope.
Using Mage Hand, Aquilonia was able to tie Name’s rope around the throne but as he started to climb gravity flipped and he ‘fell’ to the ceiling taking a small amount of damage.
Name raided the mummy for his eye-gems and good axe (ok, Bill said great, but it wasn’t anything special).
Ta-da
Willow Joins, Yagra Departs 11/21/20 – 12/19/20 – 5c
2020-11-21 – Welcome aboard Bruce
The date is Second-day, 12th Kythorn, 1492 DR – unknown bells…
Oh what a feelin’ Name’s not up on the ceiling.
Ebon and Yagra were pretty low on hit point so they took a breath on each other – eww
Seems like that first breath reminded us of the rotting corpses all around so we formed a safe marching order and headed back to the bath-room (not bathroom, bath-room).
We got to the ping-pong room – which is how dwarves used either to stop arrows from going down the hall or to make their drunken staggering seem more natural (No offense meant Nadja).
Suddenly, we came upon a smallish man walking with a staff. He was seeking a simple introduction or the evil at the bottom of the dungeon, we’re not sure which.
Turned out to be a simple introduction and now we have the title of these notes…Welcome Aboard Bruce! (Ok, Willow Cardwood).
Stote and Ebon, ever the social butterflies, were quick to invite him in…maybe too quick. But Yagra threw in just the right amount of caution and so we became a party.
We rested up in the bath area (Thpbpbpbpb) and then headed south to round out that area of the dungeon.
We started off with Stote listening at a door that had nothing to say. That didn’t phase Stote cuz he grabbed it’s knob and turned it back and forth.
There was a nifty statue in the room so, of course, Ebon tried to deface it.
Turns out that this pissed the statue off and it punched Ebon and grabbed a hold of him.
The statue must have been hungry cuz then it tried to eat him.
With muffled growls, Ebon called for aides and Stote ran over to give him some.
Aquilonia couldn’t get to a position to do anything truly useful, so she held up at the opening.
Name ran boldly into the room – that’s it
Willow moved in to make a status bbq with Produce Flame and did one point shy of max damage
The statue continued to fondle Ebon but with acid, so bad.
Nadja shielded Ebon faith (but not his nipples) and made him a bit harder to hit.
Ebon attacked the statue from within (sort of) but didn’t quite manage to get it off.
Stote rushed in to finish things off but had to wait for his second attack to hit.
Aquilonia liked the bbq idea and used a flame strike to add to the damage.
Having waited this long, Name was a bit rusty with his finishing strokes and ha to wait until his second take to end things.
Well, that did it and the statue thing dies with an excellent sound effect from Bill.
It appeared that this creature was able to ‘reproduce’ objects to fool things into a trap.
As soon as it died, Ebon was released.
And Nadja moved in to heal him.
Poking about for treasure, Ebon found a woman who works for the church (nun).
After a bit of the old Ebon/Stote, Stote decided to throw open the next door without stopping for even a moment to hear what it had to say.
Ebon had some hope that Willow could hear the halls but his inquiries fell on my ears instead. I chose not to reply).
Guess what, more hall. Stote went south, Name north.
They got more hall, Name got statues.
They stopped at some broken doors with chittering and so they slowed long enough for Name and the rest of the party to catch up (sensible).
Waiting for Willow for a moment, he was able to identify the sounds as Sturgess (ok stirges) He felt it was a small swarm.
More of the old Ebon/Stote and then Stote went to talk to the hallway and, low and behold, it talked back.
After the chat with the hall, Name convinced Ebon to open the door and…
Stirge-fest! – 20 of them all on a group…ooops
Aquilonia moved forward and reduced their number to 4 with a Shatter spell.
Name stepped up with his bow and finished them off with an action surge.
Empty room – End of night.
2020-11-28 – Ok Go – (Here it goes again)
The date is Second-day, 12th Kythorn, 1492 DR – unknown bells…
We begin by searching for treasure – still nun.
Stote lures Nadja and Ebon down the talking hall to hear what was to be heard…but guess it’s speaking spanish now because …Nada (Not Nadja)
After a bit of disappointment, we headed back to the glowing penis (floating candle) hall which Bill reminded us was pristine.
The first door revealed a small empty room
Across the hall was still more hall. Which led to additional hall and then some more hall ending in some area where they were extending the hall.
After a bit of haggling about what to do in the empty hall, the team moved back to the main hall and we (and by we I mean Stote) continued South but, rounding the corner he encountered a jelloneus cube that appears to be the overzealous cleaning woman and he ran back to alert us to the threat.
Name led off the attack determining it was easy to hit and then expanding on that by determining it was really easy to hit.
Ebon confirmed, heaping on the damage.
Nadja rang it’s bell.
Willow held off for a bit.
Yagra batted 500 but added to the damage
Stote hit as well.
Aquilonia used Mold Earth in the hopes of slowing it – Worked!
The creature was slowed on Aquilonia rubble.
Name found that you either critically miss or you don’t miss at all and finished off.
The creature began to melt/deflate and Stote and Name spent a couple arrows to speed it along.
Finding nothing, treasure-wise we decided to move downstairs.
Turns out that the hallways aren’t limited to the first level cuz there’s hallways here as well.
However, Stote immediately found a room, so things were looking up. Some creatures were creatin’ a ruckus, so Stote returned where Name’s stellar boldness convinced the group that it was us rather than them and we should shape this dungeon to our means.
Nadja cast bless and the front 3 (Stote, Ebon, and Yagra) and they headed in to danger.
Turns out the ‘danger’ was just a shit ton of goblins living in like a goblin town.
While the party was debating what Name would do, Yagra just walked right in and started shopping.
Name headed north with murder on his mind but found the total lassie fiar attitude of the goblins to be somewhat offputting. When he was unable to intimidate a lowly builder, he decided to go meet Yek, the leader of this little enclave.
Yek was some pretty human who said he had been running this group ‘forever’. They held their own and stood against the Zanathar here.
Stote and Ebon got their drink on whilst the girls went shopping.
The bazaar looked pretty junky so Name focused on Yek the Tall and his retinue. Pretty standard goblin fair, but with 4 bugbears thrown in for good measure.
Mak the liquor vendor directed Ebon to Gringia for vittles and off they went. Yagra dashed over to show Ebon the new ‘rainbow vomit’ dress she had bought.
Name headed out to round out the rooms and found Glom, a hungry female goblin hanging in a gibbet (which sparked a bit of debate) as she had stolen food from Yek. Name threw her his aging bacon sammich and she rewarded him by letting Name know that Yeck was really a goblin and his gold circlet was a magical change device that made him appear human.
Name closed out the loop to the sound and rejoined the group for bourbon and beer.
Since Name is clever that way, he threw Yagra a compliment on her beautiful new gown and shared with her the ‘stand against the Zanathar’ philosophy but everyone (except Ebon and Stote) seemed to pick up on that fact. Name ordered up a bunch more bourbon and Stote got more ale-like-beverage.
After a bit of checking with Aquilonia, we determined that the bourbon was exceptional. However, seeing as how we had already bought it all, Ebon’s hope of still more bourbon was dashed.
Ebon enjoyed a bit of food and got more bourbon from somewhere and set Willow up with one as well.
Since the goblins were already setting up the stage for the auction, the group decided to stay.
Since Mak was in a sharing mood, Ebon was able to convince him to share that one of the ‘Fine Fellows of Daggerford’ might be one of the ‘items’ up for auction. Aquilonia was quick to put it together and Bill explained further to Bruce, so I didn’t add that to the notes.
As Bill fell further and further under the calming effect of his drinking, the auction began. It was the first auction of the Rustbone Tribe.
The first ‘item’ up for bid was a bald dwarf (shaved beard too). This was probably one of the FFoD that Mak mentioned. Upon seeing us, the dwarf tried to cry out but got beaten down by the bugbear guards. The bidding began at an ask of 1 gold which was never met.
Stote shouted out a low bid of 5 silver and then he and Ebon quickly ran things back up to a gold with Stote sealing the deal by out bidding himself.
So we won the dwarf and he was thankful. He introduced himself as Copper Stormforge of the FFoD, and offered to reward us with a map that he had hidden on his person. (It was his prison wallet) It is a map of level 3 that he got from someone, not Halath (the revenant), not Kelim (the little guy in the closet), both names which Name dropped. He finally came up with ‘Yalinth’, but since we all pretty much knew he was lying, Name said that Yalinth wasn’t a map guy, but an artist. We’ll find out how this unfolds, next recipe.
2020-12-05 20 days until Christmas
The date is Second-day, 12th Kythorn, 1492 DR – unknown bells… It’s all becoming unclear
Another fantastic reading of the notes got us started (well a bit of discussion the Mandalorian and Yoda actually started us off, but then the fantastic reading).
We recapped a bit more and discussed Yek’s need to be a pretty human instead of a pretty goblin. – Good point Willow.
Name checked back on the auction just in time to outbid some bugbears for a drow that was on the blocks. 7.5 gold won the day and now Name is in the trafficking business!
Just when I was going to get to inspect my first piece of property, a goblin yelled out murderer. We turned to see Copper standing over the corpse of a young goblin with a bastard sword in his hand (Where the hell did that come from)? (Check the bugbears)?
Willow went first and tried to restrain Copper.
Ebon followed by cutting him in half.
Nadja tried to heal everyone but, learning they were both more than mostly dead, yelled out justice is served.
Yagra started dripping over Ebon’s heroics…
…and the crowd got hostile.
Name called to Yagra and then, sensing heitation, called out to Yek who got involved and called out for calm
Willow held his action – then there was some brief tutelage on beast shapes – here endeth the lesson
Ebon did not hold his action. Instead, he drove Miss Daisy (the unarmed bugbear) against (and up) a pillar and held him instead.
Yek’s message began to sink in but Ebon’s action started to tip things the other way
Bugbear one went to attack but Name talked him out of it
The rest of the room waited patiently and then Stote, the great orator, came out with the two-sided calming cry, which had the opposite effect.
Yek got the deciding vote and decided to be wishy washy – not helping
Nadja became the great orator and…with a little help from her god didn’t make things work. Mostly cuz Yek fucked things up with his followon – good try though.
Willow attempted to lawyer up the situation, but his words were too big.
Yagra stood by and tried to look virginal – epic fail
Aquilonia gave it a whirl and sounded a bit high and mighty for the crowd.
Name’s new drow got away from the goblins and ran over and grabbed a spear
Name charged over and threatened his new possesion
Willow moved to Ebon so he could closley see the exact moment when things blew the fuck up
Ebon threatened Gunther who was nonplussed so Ebon minused him.
Bugbear 1 sneak attacked Yagra and it was on like donkey kong.
Bugbear 2 attacked Name who called out to all and blamed the curse of the circlet
A wave of goblins attacked and surged into the room some small damage was handed out all around
Nadja called forth dwarven guardian spirits and they guarded most of the surrounding goblins to the grave
Aquilonia mistily stepped to a corner and shattered the shit out of those who dared to lay weapons on her (or even think of such action).
The drow blacked out the room and seemed to disappear (You would too if Yek put a javelin in your gut)
Name killed the guy to the south and then literally scared the shit out of the guy to the north just before he killed him too
Willow took a ‘stab’ at this whole combat thing and did some damage to his opponent (since he could see Yagra was doin sort of ok
Ebon turned his opponent into toothpaste and then dashed off into the darkness
While the goblins were brave enough to continue attacking, they weren’t good enough to hit anything.
Stote ripped a mudhole through one of the goblins to the north
Nadja moved north with her guardian retinue
Aquilonia moved north and tried to reassure the vendors still cowering around
Name headed towards Stote and killed one of his opponents (Trying to trim down the kill counter)
Willow went South after Yek, but in the confusion, Ebon thought he was an opponent and gave him a whack as he went by.
Ebon tried to go south and succeeded, coming out just where he wanted. He gave a good ponder to hitting Willow (even though he can see him now, but then thought better of it and kept going).
Now the goblins, reduced to three, trie to hit Stote…They failed
Stote did not and Queen (another one bit the dust)
Then Nadja ‘Tolled the dead’ and one was
Name danced across the room chanting “I get the last one”, “I get the last one” and then he did.
Nadja dismissed her guardians, Stote checked the rooms to the north. Ebon continued south.
Name moved to cover the west entrances and assured some vendors hiding their that we had almost finished defeating the curse.
Ebon, startled by Dabussey, almost cleaved her. He stopped himself at the last moment.
H showed a little too much knowledge of how rage and domestic violence go together…and then Ebon continued South through the door’
Eventually the darkness disappeared and hiding therein was Yek. Name dashed down and took away his circlet.
He kept playing the curse act and gave the circlet to Aquilonia and then we ended a bit early so Steve and Joe could have enough time to finish watching Brokeback Mountain together.
2020-12-12- The Lost Notes
The date is roughly the third or fourth-day, 12th Kythorn, 1492 DR – unknown bells… It’s all becoming unclear because we have lost the notes.
2020-12-19 – Will there be notes?
So, last barb – Last week, there was no reading of the notes, cuz there are no notes.
The date is roughly the third or fourth-day, 12th Kythorn, 1492 DR – unknown bells… It’s all still unclear CUZ THERE WEREN”T ANY NOTES!!!! (ok that’s the last barb).
I had an awesome plan to run a mini-party within the party but Steve suggested Joe run Willow, so there goes my Coup d’Etat!
Willow started horsing around and picked up the rest of the party in his shenanigans. We didn’t get as far as we could, cuz there are some limitations to unshod warhorses.
As Nadja was trying to mount Willow (Hmm), she saw black Andy Gibb the hermaphrodite drow.
Yaga continued to lay there
Stote decided not to disengage because he’s strong that way. It worked cuz his cloak displaced him. He then began trying to carve his way back in. Oops, didn’t work. But he was inspired to try again and swashed his buckles all over the BB3. He then used his boner to attack again but wasn’t feeling pokey and fled back a bit.
Bill then went for a really long time (He’s got a lot of guys)
Ebon started talking to his axe sort of hoping it might defend him. Looks like he’s using the Barbarian skill of Panic rather than Rage
Then Bill went again for a really long time (cuz he gets to go twice in a round)
Willow galloped down the halls.
Bill said huh.
Nadja tried to cast bless and almost fell until she was inspired by a Justin Timberlake (boob grab) to succeed.
Name apologized for the wardrobe malfunction.
Yagra tried to fondle Ebon – Hmm, wasn’t she dead?
Stote decided to attack his petite bugbear du jour. He did a little bit, did a little bit of damage to the bugbear.
Bill went again (Damn it, he gets a lot of turns). He tried to hit Ebon, but Ebon was still being dodgy. So he cheated and hit Stote with a pokey thing. Then he went back and hit Ebon again and this time he got knocked down, but didn’t get up again.
Willow charged the rest of the way and shook us off.
Aquilonia took out the first of what will be many to come with a firebolt.
-Section removed for drunkenly disparaging our DM who is, as we all know, superior in every way!-
Nadja ran (on her stubby little legs) and clogged up the entrance. But she hit and killed her foe, so, problem solved.
Name dismounted and charged into the room. He failed to see the drow so he shot the bugbear, to death. He then threatened the crowd to the point that at least they didn’t laugh.
Stote took out another but his theatrical threats fell on deaf ears (unfortunately, cuz they might have dropped their weapons laffing).
Bill went yet again and knocked the blessing out of Nadja with one of his bugbears. That didn’t satisfy his need to kill characters so he kept attacking and doing damage. Nadja was down to 1 hp but both she and Name inspired their foes to miss. But there are soooooo many of them that it took forever for Bill to wrap things up. He shot Stote in the (not the face).
Finally, Willow went and Joe cast Spike Growth and got a whole lot of them
Aquilonia followed up with a Shatter to heap injuries on that insult.
Bill went again with UC. Took a bit, he doesn’t play UC very often.
Nadja gave Aids to Ebon, Herself, and Stote. Eww
Name killeded one, then missed, got inspired, Phil Collins’d (missed again), then James bond’d the shit (killed and killed again).
UC yelled out “engage them now or face the wrath of the Xanathar later”. Nadja translated. Name retorted by saying “I’m gonna fuck you, in the ass!”
Then it was Bill’s turn again and an avalanche of damage fell on Name who yelled out something totally appropriate and glib, but Bill didn’t let him roll intimidation.
Ebon, all Micahle Bolton’y headed south (fag). The brain dog followed and hit, but much of it’s damage was absorbed by bounty the quicker picker upper (or the temp damage from Aids).
Willow just laid there and snoozed.
Something happened with Ebon but why the fuck would the guy taking notes need to know.
Aquilonia said, fuck it, better to wipe everuyone out that nobody so…burning hands, but used her war wizard ability to avoid damaging Nadja and Name (Hells Yeah).
Nadja laid there and bled for a bit.
Name killed his first foe and missed the second. Aquilonia inspired him to retry and this time he scored a kill.
Stote swept in and finished the last opponent and moved on (around the couch) and killed the brain dog as well.
Willow napped.
Aquilonia fed Nadja her own (really) healing potion and almost maxed it out.
Stote hooked up Ebon and Name downed his own and we decided to head back up to Waterdeep.
As we passed through the Goblin area, some of them got a little penis-y and, while Stote failed to intimidate them, Ebon thought they were fine. Name drew his sword but checked with Aquilonia who seemed to think they were ok so Name held his blade.
We made it out to the YP, and broke for Christmas.
2021 – Another year of adventuring – 31.5 Chapters
In Town and Opening Trollskull – 1/15/21 -3/06/21 – 6c
2021-01-15 – Back on the Chain Gang
Fourth Day, 14th Krythorn 1492 DR
So, we got started with a light recap of the interrogations last week. (Good side adventure).
Then we started to cash in the treasures and ran across two notes:
1) Markus’ wife Penelope is bitchin at him for bein’ a shit and hangin with ‘Undertakers’
2) ‘Branflakes‘ was gettin kicked out of his lodgings by Maximillian Artemel, the proprietor of the Lightsinger theater.
Stote and Ebon wandered off to find trouble and didn’t have to go too far before trouble found them. They Helen Kellered with the new guy for a moment and then went to get busy in an alley.
Their new acquaintance advised them not to follow the Zhentarim, but instead to follow the Xanathar. He wanted to lead them all astray and get them all hooked up. ‘Sphincter’ made a good deception check for him and ‘Bullseye’. Their new friend got them a signet ring/token of Xanathar advising them to go see Rex at the Rearing Hippocampus (An inn in the dock ward on Adder lane) and tell them “Honer-able” sent you.
Meanwhile…
Aquilonia and Nadja went out to find somewhere to sell components and learn spells. Heh heh, fireball, fireball, heh heh. A couple silvers got them to the castle ward and the Tower of Order in the Castle Ward.
Then my dad wanted to ask 100 questions about movies and so I set him up with the Russia House.
So, we stuck with Aquilonia and Nadja. We got good background on the Tower of the Order and their machinations and how they helped the city of Waterdeep. We also learn they tell terrible jokes. They were able to give her the spell on credit. Aquilonia left her spell book and they went on their way. Aquilonia and Nadja continued to cozy up to Quillam and Nadja felt comfortable enough to whip it out (her supply of monster bits). While Quillam went off to check things, he left our girls in the only somewhat capable hands of Felkus. Felkus needed some reassuring that he didn’t suck.
Meanwhile….
Name headed down to see Roni and stop by the Lightsinger Theatre
Meanwhile….
Stote (Now herger) and Ebon (still Bullseye) arrived at the rearing hypothalamus finding it to be a very seedy place, they decided to go in and get some waffles. Stote was sporting a turned out right front pocket, the TG symbol for looking to talk.
After finding out that the bar didn’t serve a delicious lunch, Stote decided to tip their hand about the undertakers. Just when things weren’t going all ‘My Little Buttercup’, Stote fumbled his way into the right answer. They started making friends with the Xanathar and sexy rexy. Rex spelled out how the Xanathar gets a cut of everything for doing very little. Rex went on to ‘splain how happy he was that Herger and Bullseye had ambled in as soon as they did.
Meanwhile…
Aquilonia and Nadja stopped Felkus from leaving with some veiled threats about future employment. While Aquilonia wasn’t all that persuasive, Felkus did stay on til shift change. While things seemed to be going from bad to worse, Nadja and Aquilonia double teamed him and managed to convince him to stay. Nadja decided to use her feminine wiles to stall him further and Quillan came back to some motor boating. Quillan thanked Nadja for her services in driving the horrible Felkus off the property. Quinlan ended up giving Nadja a total of 950 G for everything and exterminating Felkus’ employment. He then conveniently sold back two diamonds and the fireball training. So net nil.
Nadja inquired about joining the guild, and found out about dues and sech and got the skinny on the symbol to look out for.
Meanwhile…
Name continued to pursue Maximillian Atremel at the Lightsinger and, not finding him, went to shower Roni with trinkets and affections.
Meanwhile…
The Xanathar around the bar had decided not to kill Stote and Ebon and so they departed with really great haste. However, fast as he was, Stote was not able to outpace Zalatheus Zarthspinner who followed him to the door and gave him a card as well as a bit of wit. After this, they headed back towards Trollskull.
Meanwhile…
Aquilonia and Nadja went and had a nice lunch, did a bit of shopping, and headed back to Trollskull.
Meanwhile…
Name tapped that ass and headed back to Trollskull.
Meanwhile…
Stote filled in the rest of the group on everything and much chit chat ensued.
Meanwhile…
Name, who thought he was fine, got to see the front of TrollSkull Manor explode…
KABOOM!!!
2021-01-16 – Two in a Row!
Fourth Day, 14th Krythorn 1492 DR…about 11 bells
As we rejoin things from Kaboom…
Everyone had been in the taproom shooting the shit except for Name who had been tappin’ dat ass. He got a great view of the explosion. I will of course consult with my attorney regarding testimony of Name’s position in the street but, armed with just daggers, he eyed the street and the area of the explosion
Was traveling back to the house so missed what Willow did.
What turned out not to be Nadja taking a crap was instead a dragonborn, sent by Aquilonia‘s father who introduced himself as Fil a dent with Gravy on it (Felemid De Trevignon). He quietly pointed out, as he appeared from the trapdoor behind the bar, that there would be people coming from the cellar. Apparently other than himself.
Stote flug himself bodily through the opening conveniently made by the blast, ended up on the street, and saw people coming from the north. He called out a warning and…
Nadja thought that the rest of the party had sneezed and blessed them all. It left them moist with an odd smell but many benefits. Then she vaulted the bar – name change – she’s now Nadja Komenich. She got a 9.6 on the uneven bar and then stuck the landing on the tabletop for a 9.8 (C’mon, she only got a perfect 10 once).
Ebon reached out to grab the new dragonborn but Aquilonia cut him off with a sharp word. Filadentwithgravy reminded Ebon that he was there to help. Ebon prepped for the cellar chop.
A group of thugs then began pouring in from various locations.
Ebon used his held action to chop one dumb enough to come through the cellar door.
Our foes continued pouring in and various attacks flew everywhere to no avail.
Aquilonia decided to heat things up on the dance floor and spun up an oldy but goody – Agnazar’s Scorcher. She got a couple, one all the way to death.
Some strange woman (looking like quadruplets, but maybe Stote was just really drunk,) moved into the street and cast a spell of some sort.
Rocco took a chunk out of Stote, after charging in from seemingly nowhere.
Name continued to move forward
Willow vaulted the bar with great dexterity and went to attack when suddenly the gods struck down his connection. As soon as he came back in defiance of the gods, he scored his first hit!!! (In the battle and in Fantasy grounds)
Filinadent attacked and killeded the shit out of a guy and sent him cursing back into the cellar.
Stote wnet all stabby-stabby on Rocco, getting a crit on the second stabby.
Nadja cast spirit guardian (you know, the spell that wiped out the goblin market) and set them on the foes in the street. Billy read about this for a while and then the spell went off.
Ebon gave Rocco the old choppy choppy and did a good bit of damage.
Someone shot Nadja with a crossbow, but I was apparently typing my notes in space and so then, the rest of the thugs continued their attempted attack with a bunch of misses.
Aquilonia came off mute and killed a guy with a firebolt with a measly six.
Suddenly a nearby building attacked everybody (ok, Ebon and Nadja) with a fireball. I know cuz Stote saw it.
Then Jerry Lewis’ favorite villian (Hey Lady), failed her wisdom save and cried out in pain in such a way that Nadja heard a familiar musical lilt that she just couldn’t put her finger on. Instead of casting a spell on Nadja the lady tried to rapier her. She only got half the job done rapey wise, but it was enough to drop Nadja.
Rocco caught sight of Ebon and went a bit nutty. Only nutty enough to hit him once.
Name appeared to charge into combat but then vanished in a silvery mist. (He landed in his room).
Willow, using enhanced movement and a quiet voice, headed out into the street and attacked the mystery woman.
Then we switched to teams.
Filinadent, not really anyone’s companion, had to use his entire movement to get to the street.
Stote, being extra drunk, tried to shot his wad into the mystery woman hoping that it was actually Jade and not her effeminate brother (like that chick in the bad vampire movie).
Nadja failed buck buck #1
Ebon looked at Rocco and said – what choo talking about Rocco, I doesn’t know you. He hit twice with his axe while Rocco ranted on about something unimportant.
Then them there thugs went and started chopping into the party.
Aquilonia finished everyone off with (ok, just kidding), moved to into the street and turned up the heat on Rocco and his buddy “Thug #2”.
Suddenly, Ebon sprouted a crown of twisted metal and Bill provided no additional information.
TMW attacked Willow and tried to make him her second rape victim.
Nadja passed buck buck #2 – False alarm, it was Rocco.
Name performed a tiny Tim, and took out TMW and then attacked Thug number 1 doing some fancy damage after being inspired to hit a bit harder with his second attack.
Willow threw some healing on the cleric and Nadja was taken aback by the reversal of fortune.
Filinadent came out and tattooed thug number 2 but not in the kewl ‘nice ink’ way.
Stote kills that guy
Ebon might have felt like attacking Filinadent but Stote wouldn’t shut up long for Bill to say yummy after Joe slapped him in the face with his dick. However, Bill slapped back, replacing Ebon’s rage with some rules lawyering.
Aquilonia was able to yell out that Ebon was affected by a crown of madness and that everyone should back off.
We weren’t able to spot anyone else and so we listened while the Felemid De Travignon (fill-in-a-dent) splained the situation to us. It seems like Yagra has fucked things up for everybody.
Willow surmised that maybe the braindogs were running the shit. Filinadent splain more about the Beholder that runs the Xanthar and then we wrapped up…..
2021-02-06 – Officially more than a year
Fourth Day, 14th Krythorn 1492 DR…about 11 bells -still since the combat wouldn’t have taken two whole weeks.
We are scattered about the street in front of Trollskull manor having just learned …whoops – read below (that was the last thing we remembered)
We actually started out in a large cavern where Stone Giants were attempting to exterminate us like a bunch of roaches. (I’m betting dream sequence)
Name got hit twice and took a bunch of damage.
Ebon also got hit and was damaged as well.
The final one attacked Nadja and damaged her as well.
Nadja took her turn after figuring out that the giants sounded a little weird. She called upon her god for aid and he helped out by letting her cast Spirit Guardians, which did radiant damage to all of them. She then used some body spray (Drew her Axe) to get ready for the next big boy.
Ebon went a little body spray on his own using his choppy choppy to attack the giants as well. His axe seemed to get all excited whenever he was successful. In fact, his axe got so excited, Ebon felt a surge of energy and attacked again. This was enough to stagger the giant. Additionally, all of his damage was healed. (Ok, latest update, Ebon’s blows actually killed it)
Name Hit (24) – missed, inspired – missed again, Nadja added favor, hit (22), action surged hit again (19) and missed
Aquilonia went with the Fire bolt to little effect.
Stote went to apply hunter’s mark, which reminded Name that he had it too (+9). He then proceeded to heap more damage on the same giant (27).
Willow just couldn’t believe that they were there and therefore found it hard to hit.
STG1 flattened Name and then moved on to Nadja, which caused him to encounter the beer gardens and take additional damage. Yay beer garden- Name’s back up. And, instead of moving on, STG1 moved to the river Styx.
STG2, the LGS (last giant standing) decided to pound on Willow for a while.
Nadja left the beer garden and gave Name, Willow, and Ebon Aids. She then asked the giant politely to stop attacking or else. Upon turning to Ebon, she saw ‘not Ebon’ but a fat guy with Ebon’s axe.
Then Ebon/Not Ebon sporting full chub, charged in and superman chopped him. Nadja tried to stop him by wrestling him to the ground. Unforkunately, she missed. Ebon continued and chopped the giant once but, slightly distracted by Nadja‘s surge of interest, missed on chop # 2.
Name then got to attack but his ardor cooled for the giant and his flame went out. He attacked anyway using Hunter’s Mark to offset the darkness and did 22
Aquilonia went with firebolt and did 18 more.
Stote decided to search STG3 and opened his bag.
Willow, apparently still thinking the giant wasn’t there, continued to find it hard to hit. But at least he still saw Ebon as Ebon.
STG2 hit Ebon and was surprised at how little damage he actually did.
Nadja was going to do something but instead figured out the dream sequence and awaoke (told you so).
So…It’s really Ninth day, 14th Krythorn 1492 DR….
From our last adventure we had met Aquilonia‘s father, planned repairs for the manor and construction was well underway. We’ve killed some time doing the usual.
In spooning with Roni, Name learned that she wasn’t all that good at pillow talk cuz who talks about spying while spooning. We set things sort of straight and then moved on.
Willow got a bit of prime time, as we don’t have a lot of back story on his time in Waterdeep. He was out doing public space gardening and getting to know the town.
Thoughts were made about Willow growing the manor’s defenses after the repairs were made.
After a bit of discussion about the group pitching in on Trollskull manor, Nadja started to think about how her goddess spoke with her and then rolled really well and then figured out the dream was a prophecy or omen.
I understand them, but Nadja won’t ask Name 🙁
Nadja went off to find supplies
Stote came down lookin for bacon.
Name went out to get to know the neighborhood and found that the three closest connected buildings are residences and Tali Fellbracnh a half-elf carpenter and woodcarver owns the endcap building labeled the Bent Nail – where he lives.
Aquilonia went back to get her spellbook which was pre-paid. And then we remembered it was Quillen who gave Aquilonia a great deal on things for helping with the Felkis situation.
Don’t forget that Sphincter and Bovine are actually Stote and Ebon.
Willow likewise went to check out the neighborhood. Specifically, the greenhouse looking building to the south. Turned out it was a greenhouse and some woman lives there and raised a rainbow of flowers on the third floor of this townhouse. The sign says: “Corellons Crown”. Willow went in for a peruse and heard birds escaping but saw nothing.
Nadja was still looking around for trinkets and tokens and finally found something that was a bit farther away than one turn would allow.
Getting back to Ebon after screwing him, Bill also decided to age him a bit since he doesn’t spend much time looking in the mirror. Satisfied with his semi-annual self check, he headed down to the smells of bacon.
Stote saw Ebon out of the corner of his eye; he gobbled up all the bacon.
Name continued to investigate the surroundings and determined from Aquilonia’s father that there are some connections from the manor to underground locations in Waterdeep. Instead of elaborating, we went on to meet the neighbors.
While the residents weren’t at home (read described), there was a shop called Steam and Steel.
Aquilonia headed into the kitchen and the rapidly fading smells of bacon to find a bit to eat for herself.
Willow, moving around in the Crown, encountered a somewhat androgenous person who greeted him and engaged in pleasantries about the recent improvements to the manor. Willow introduced himself to Falia Leaffaller who he quickly determined was another druid. (Still couldn’t determine the sex, but did determine that ‘Pat’ sold some potions and sech. Willow’s sage background gave his some insight into the alchemical processes used to create potions. It seemed like they were going to become fast friends and perhaps in a future session, Willow will finally get that sex question answered.
Nadja went back to Quillem’s and got the snotty bobby treatment from a twerp who didn’t want to give his name and seemed to be a bit racist. After some discussion, Nadja was about to leave when Quillem returned and dismissed Claritin. After shooting the shit, Quillem sold Nadja the tokens she needed and at a discount.
While everyone else is out taking care of bidness, Ebon and Stote engaged in the bacon battles. The first round was a tie and bacon was shared by everyone.
Aquilonia arrived just in time to see the aftermath. The threesome prepared breakfast.
Name popped in to the Steam and Steel and found the shop being worked by both a Fire and Water Genasi. Avi (Water) and Embric (fire). They were the proprietors of the shop and plaque carrying members of the safe metalworkers or some such.
Willow kept talking with Pat and may have learned a bunch of important shit, but I was putting my dad to bed. There’s a druids guild, Willow was interested in that as well, and Pat and Willow leaned over its table and made potions well into the day.
Nadja was sharing her Mr Potatohead picture with Quillem and, after turning it the right way, it turned out to look pretty good indeed. Quellim offered to go look up more in a book that he knew of but then pandered her for a gold or two to cover the expenses of some spell components. Nadja, apparently being every bit as thick in the head as the middle, took a bit of time to sort out that she had the coin to cover the ask.
Aquilonia, still working on breakfast, got organized and decided to share. As breakfast was cooking, Ebon and Aquilonia decided that Ebon was indeed Ebon and all was right with the world. During this Aquilonia noticed the new postal worker Felkis delivering notes to her box and with Stote announcing that breakfast was ready, they headed back in to eat.
Name found that the quality of S&S was in keeping with their plaque and there was pretty brisk business obviously with the number of purchased and repaired items. He did notice that there were some garden shears for Falla. Continuing down the way and ended up at the Crown and might have been surprised to see Willow there as well (We’ll find out)
Nadja, having concluded business around town, returned to the manor and discovered something in Aquilonia‘s box. It was a letter addressed to Aquilonia, Name, and friends. She delivered it to the closest of the ‘named’ addressees Aquilonia.
Turns out this was an invitation to join the local merchant’s guild and certify that this was an actual bidness. Even though Bill thought we would end here, we decided to haggle about how we would answer.
2021-02-20 – We’re opening up for bidness?
With all the naysayers having wet themselves over their decision to not be a bidness, we decided not to be a bidness…for now
So we continue with the 10th day, 20th Krythorn, 1492 DR – and Stote awakened at 7 bells to the heavenly aroma of bacon. Stote dex-checked his way down the stairs to find out what was up.
It appears the rest of us were all awakened by the sounds.
Stote got there first as he raced down the stairs with Name a close second vaulting his balcony and walking in the front way.
Aquilonia is going to freshen up so probably won’t be in the rest of these notes.
Everyone else used various modalities to get down to breakfast, except Nadja who went up to try to catch a glimpse of Ebon things, but those, as well as Ebon (and his gear) were missing.
Aquilonia was the last to arrive but boy, did she look the better for it (no, seriously, Billy you should have commented on how nice she looked after she spent all that time getting ready) however she immediately left as she was worried about Ebon. Nadja could have saved her a trip but was too busy shoveling meat in her mouth to be coherent.
The rest of us continued eating while more food and ales were delivered.
Name decided to go up and get ready for the day.
Everyone else (except Willow wrapped things up and went to get ready for the day as well.
Aquilonia discussed Stote‘s disappearance with Stote but, as Stote seemed to think this was par for the course, she went down to find out how her unseen servant(s) had become so much more efficient.
Nadja spread herself out in front of the fire and began to …………pray.
Aquilonia got her first view of the invisible servants and determined that they did not seem to be as expected. These invisible servants appear to be non-magical in nature so Aquilonia decided to question them. They answered by giving her deez nuts which Aquilonia enjoyed.
Aquilonia began having a conversation with her coffee cup to better determine who our invisible hosts were. Well, Juan Valdez decided to be chatty and the coffee cup started chatting with Aquilonia.
Nadja relayed her vision about Ebon to Aquilonia and now both of them have their panties in a bunch.
Stote didn’t do anything to ausage anyone’s fear of anything except his own fear of not getting any more bacon. The girls filled him in.
As we were discussing things, a halfling (Said his name was Broxly Fairkettle) showed up looking for a bit of breakfast.
This sparked a bit of debate but Name caught on and got the cups on his side.
Just as we thought we had everything settled, another halfling, Beepus Honeymaker, was drawn in by the smell of breakfast as well.
Aquilonia, wanting things to be on the up, and up, asked for the merchant’s guild application and it appeared together with a really old quill.
Sandhor -dammit – Sandhor
Name produced an ink pen and everything was signed.
We were advised to head down and see Vincent Trench at the Tiger’s Eye to see if he might have encountered Ebon so Stote and Ebon were going to check this out.
Nadja stopped us while she cast a shitty augury spell which let us know that our action would wheel? weel? we’ll?
Stote and Name headed down to the Tiger’s Eye and found it locked. A bit of knocking and the door was answered by a cat man (do). After a bit of discussion, we determined that this was Vincent Trench PI. For a mere 5 silver, he told us that Ebon had been talking with no one. First arguing and then walking arm and arm away to the east. After he told this tale, Name was pretty sure he knew what happened and might even know where to find Ebon.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch – Nadja recalled that she should meet with Quilem for some additional information.
Aquilonia wanted to make sure the licensing was all well and good, and hired a runner to make that delivery while she headed off with Nadja. Willow, still unsure of the whole ‘Pat’ thing, decided to join them.
Quillem showed them a picture of the dream guy (Mazrick Crazy Mane) who also wielded a big ass (axe) and had used it to kill many giants. MCM had many adventures and many kids too, but the notable child was Carlsbane Crazymane who became the chief of this little inbred tribe.
After the MCM tribe had move south, the giants tracked them down and killed MCM. This caused his wife (Usthula Crazyqane) to curse the axe so that it could never be used to kill giant-kin again.
Since Nadja was dissatisfied with the cliff notes version of this story, Aquilonia was allowed to borrow the book.
Nadja was so happy with this information she repaid Quellem with a nasty old giant’s toe.
Stote and Name went back to the manor where the hobbits were multiplying like..well, halflings. The manor seemed to be holding it’s own for the most part but, at least the good people of the alley appeared fairly honest.
After AD, Nadja, and Willow returned we caught the corner table and discussed getting some pricing and collecting going on.
We moved on to discover that Willow, being from the area, had some knowledge of the Tribe of the Worm, which had moved to the NeverWinter Wood about 100 years ago. They are a mostly half-orc tribe by descent and were in tune with nature and sech.
Just when we were trying to figure out what to do next, Ebon strolled in – (probably controlled by a brain dog) and said he has been on a date with Yagra, not that one, the real Yagra and that’s where we ended.
2021-02-27 – Where the F is Nadja?
10th day, 20th Krythorn 1492 DR – It’s now 8 bells. (Whoopsie daisies, only 5).
Brandi welcomed Joe back and then a row was started cuz no one else said anything about Joe’s absence.
Ebon, confused by the profusion of customers, regaled us with his story about the Yagra who was stored in the axe having come out to him last night (no, not that way, but in a weirder spectral way). Ebon was happy as the usual entity in his axe is some guy (hmmm). During their spiritual meanderings, Yagra had told him about Guy Brightwood that she had met who needed some heartstone to restore some other dead girl (not Yagra, who he swears isn’t dead, but lives now in the axe) – Long story short – too late – Ebon and Yagra went to the portal, talked about stuff, had a great time, nad then she …?
Now that everyone else is convinced he’s crazy, he might as well have breakfast. No sooner did the word cross his lips than the invisible servants gave him the iHop treatment.
Concerns soon shifted from Ebon’s dwindling sanity to the manor’s dwindling supplies as Nadja‘s ale showed up only 1/3 full and had that distinct ‘bottom of the barrel’ taste.
With near panic ensuing at the table, Name went to put an end to the ‘Soft Close’ and Stote used the opportunity to snatch a piece of bacon from Ebon’s plate. Ebon was quick witted enough to notice that Stote was eating something, but not quick witted enough to figure out what.
Nadja thought this was a great opportunity to make a grab but failed.
Aquilonia brought everyone crashing back to reality with boring discussions about business stuff and she and Ebon ended up heading of to hire our very own Gordon Ramsey – (You know Bill, D&D could give a whole new twist to Hell’s kitchen).
As soon as she and Ebon left, Nadja filled our heads up with the Ebon backstory.
Aquilonia and Ebon headed off to her parents house and it clicked in Ebon’s head that Aquilonia actually had parents. They talked about Ebons folks as well, but it seemed a lot greyer than you might expect. Aquilonia did find out that the axe was a gift from Ebon’s dear old dad, but Ebon didn’t really recall the details. (Whoops, Bill refreshed Ebon’s memory and we start to see some connective tissue).
St, Nd, and Nm caught a fast cab to the YP to see if we could dig up the skinny on Ebon. We got there at about 9 bells and folks were startin’ to be able to recognize us.
As the drinks arrived, so did a drow that Stote recognized from the Xanathar Guild. (When he and Ebon were Herger and Bovine – respectively).
The drow asked Stote for his earnings and long story short (did it this time) we pissed off the guy from the Xanathar guild.
Nadja, ever wanting to see ‘something’ and this time hiding it under the guise of hating Drow, cast command and said …disrobe. It worked, but not the way Nadaja intended. After a bit of ogling, it appears that Nadja‘s hatred of drow was slightly reduced.
Aquilonia and Ebon made it to her parent’s home and the faux pas began to flow like wine. (And yes they just arrived) Aquilonia headed down to see her da in the basement and left Ebon to regale Riggs with tales of his mad adventures.
Insert funny Laurel and Hardy story here- but which one’s Laurel and, well you get it. Then there was drinking. Hmmm maybe Dean and Jerry – but which one’s Jerry – oh, there it is…Ebon.
Aquilonia knows all the in and outs of the old manse and quickly got time alone with Bill in some weird father/daughter shit.
Back at the YP, after Tripod left, Stote wanted to put the public hit on him but knowing about bounties and shit helped dissuade him.
Durnin told us that Ebon had had some…challenges… last night when folks gave him grief for talking to himself (and drinking with himself too). Durnin’s helper Rick, thought he might have to throw him out -HA- but things calmed down.
Durnin also seemed to be aware of our double involvement with the guilds and said he’d look the other way as needed.
Just then Nadja‘s ‘friend’ (Ezvele Rosznar) showed up to see if we had seen any signs of her brother yet (she expects him to somewhere down near the third level) and then she made some week- ass joke about being a double agent and Nadja didn’t get a handle on whether or not she was kidding. Nadja then tried to get an address (ostensibly just being friendly, but …we know)
And Ebon and riggs were still going…
Ezvele gve her address as Thunderstaff Way in the Rosznar villa in the north ward. $$$$
Ebon and Riggs are still goin’ but it seems like Riggs is catching up. Hmmm, never a good idea to drink with the help.
Well, we all got back to the manor and dismayed Aquilonia with the news of Stote and Ebon’s involvement with the Xanathar guild. Aquilonia responded as women often do by writing a letter.
Everyone got to bed, as it was 12 bells. There were various preparations made and everyone slept through the evening…mostly
Twas’ the day of deliveries and all through the bar, guards were delivering, they’re too noisy by far. With Nadja in her kerchief and Name in his cap, we rolled con checks with disadvantage and most of us like crap. But even though he’d given his caltrops a scatter, Stote sprang from his bed to see what the hell was going on. (So did Ebon)
But what to their poorly rested eyes should appear but some well-armed men delivering beer. And even when Ebon threatened to fight, they just kept on going ‘these boxes ain’t light. But, with their sleep ruined, Stote and Ebon stayed up, they wished for some breakfast and a few coffee cups.
Cutting back to the upstairs, someone pounded on doors, and Nadja and Name could lie there no more, so we headed downstairs to get something to eat. We got stopped at the door – these guards need to retreat. So comfortably seated we waited to dine, but the guards were eating too, why the hell is there a line?
When finally Lady Sandhor appeared well things changed, there was bowing and scraping the guards all knew her name. So soon after breakfast, the seven bells chimed and the crowds poured on in, it was opening time.
Ran out of inspiration – and Bill found his F’in token.
While a somewhat weak place to end – we do have a big day tomorrow.
A little filler continued to flow including Flagon, Stote‘s associate from Oakhurst, who apparently has been following Stote and using up his reputation up along the way. Well, in the old vein of keeping your friends close and enemies closer, Name invited him to join the crew.
2021-03-06 Now we know what pegging is
11th day, 20th Krythorn 1492 DR – 8 Bells (morning)
We start out in the morning at the manor having invited Flagon to join. He and Stote went to the bar to drink and get better acquainted. Bill and Steve went off to v-peg in a private room.
Observing the conversation, we don’t learn much but learned a whole bunch when Stote returned. Seems that Flagon turned us over to the Xanithar guild but at least he gave us a heads up.
Then we all rolled wisdom saves with disadvantage which left us with an item/burning sensation to return to the dungeon under the YP.
Bill is so generous and still believes in love (even though sex is the ‘real’ driving force here) he gave Name plenty of chances to make a romantic gesture on his way to the dungeon, but it looks like Roni will just have to wonder.
We caught a dray back to the YP but on the way saw Flagon on the side of the road either crying in fear or doing some sort of S&M thing. Seems like the latter as Stote and Ebon when to help. There was some more virtual pegging and it seemed enough to get us all off the dray and into the streets for some more roleplay.
Stote was quick to extricate Flagon from what seemed like quite a situation and leaving the rest of the party to check out this area of the square. Ebon followed into the alley and they met with ‘Mom’ some elf with some pretty squirrelly hair.
Name talked everyone else into going back to the YP and the dungeon.
Turns out that it really may be Stote’s mom. They discussed some family stuff as well as some details about town. Mom wanted Stote to return home to Oakhurst cuz Waterdeep is such a dangerous place. Stote reassured her that he was getting pretty dangerous too. Ebon sheepishly back him up and things a bit calmer with ‘mom’. As the conversation progressed, it appeared that mom was a nutjob and she went back to warning him to depart.
Flagon, under some duress, indicated that ‘mom’ was mad at him for failing to get Stote to leave Waterdeep. Satisfied with that response, ST and EB headed towards the YP.
At the YP Name figured out he didn’t have the cash to pay for everyone. Yagra went over to make sex silhouettes in front of the fire. Aquilonia went down on someone and called it a snack. Seems like Nadja‘s silhouette attracted a frisky gnome but not from a distance cuz he’s working there.
Just as Name was badgering everyone to drop coin and head down, Stote and Ebon showed up. This’ll take a while.
Name ordered a snack and some ale for everyone and told Rick to be quick about it but he stuck around to answer stupid questions.
Oh fer fuck sake, are we ever going to get into the dungeon. (There Bill, even roll playing in the notes)
Stote went to cuddle with Rick at the end of the bar and managed to learn that the group that went down earlier were Zentarim.
Then we had the world’s longest toast delay.
Finally, we get into the dungeon and Name feels a bit better. So, we decided to close out the north.
Heading back to the large room where we killed the Manticores, we opened the doors to the south. We discovered the corpse of a large basilisk grasping a large crystal sphere. As Nadja and Ebon entered and began climbing the corpse, they were attacked by a couple Gs.
Stote shot one to death and Name followed suit. No more Gs. Nadja picked up the globe, which glowed faintly with a mysterious light. Since it was obviously magic, Nadja turned things over to Aquilonia to identify.
Moving forward a bit, Name and Mr Peekers (Stote) started to scope out the hallway ahead. Finding a large room full of statues, Nadja rushed forward to investigate (A relative term). Name moved forward to join Stote and Nadja and checked out the room in the light of his sword.
The statues were all life-like (remember the basilisk?) except one that seemed carved from a shiny stone. After very little debate and even less discussion, Stote decided to attack. Whatever the shiny material was, responded by oozing out onto the floor and we all rolled initiative.
Stote, refusing to change his dice color, rolled a 1 and missed. He called for Ebon who called back that we should ‘handle it’.
Name tried to handle it by shooting it with two arrows.
The black thing oozed across the floor and covered Name’s sword, dimming the light and reeking of corrosiveness.
Nadja tolled the cowbell.
Stote retreated a bit and shot it with an arrow and then ran away some more.
Ebon refused to join the fight cuz he was still watching Aquilonia.
Name hit the thing with Alchemist’s fire and a flask of oil.
The creature hit back with some burning testicle and did a bit of damage.
Nadja didn’t feel things were difficult enough and so created a second one by slicing it with a spiritual blade.
Name disengaged and moved south.
The black things split up with the larger going after Stote and the smaller coming after Name in the south.
Nadja successfully tolled the dead but, being a slow learner, created another one with a slicing attack.
Stote struck with his dagger and, even though it was piercing damage, got a little on himself. He called for his Ebon again.
Ebon finally figured that fighting things that are killing the party might be more important than guarding someone in an empty room and joined the fray. Coming around the wrong corner, he used Javelins to close the distance.
All of the northern black things seemed drawn to Nadja (probably because she’s short and thick) and that’s the way that works. The southern one wanted a piece of Name.
Nadja weent with a greataxe (aw c’mon really?) and sliced off yet another one. Now these things are stacking up all over the place. Oops, she’s surrounded; let’s see what happens when she tries to move. Well, that went poorly – She goes down.
Stote has taken Ebon’s place watching someone in an empty room and tried to get Aquilonia to stop the spell and join the fray. He then entered the fray and killeded the shit out of one of them.
Ebon then killded another with a javelin.
Name moved south again to break away
One black ooze moved north to attack Ebon (who had created noise to draw its attention. It did heavy damage. The other one moved north to suck Nadja up (Hard to keep the blacks off the thick ones) and made her fail a death save.
Aquilonia dumped the spell she had been casting (gee couldn’t Ebon have asked her to do that in the first round?) She rounded the corner and saw Nadja‘s near corpse being digested. She didn’t like that too much and….. figured out they were black puddings and…. firebolted that little SOB.
Nadja didn’t die.
Stote didn’t hit – wait, inspiration allowed him to fix that shit. He ultra fixed it and killded another one.
Ebon did something but I didn’t catch it.
Name lit his lantern.
The pudding (Thanks Aquilonia) , which wasn’t actually dead, attacked Ebon and did more damage.
Aquilonia tried to pull Nadja out but struggled a bit since Nadja‘s pretty thick. (Sam suggested anal but that didn’t work). Aquilonia was able to get her a little ways but it was slow going. She did get some of the pudding off of her.
Stote engaged the final one and killded it too.
Name picked up his lantern
We made a few week Bill Cosby jokes
Stote gave a good heal to Nadja
After the combat, Name mentioned the statues that appeared to be victims of the dead basilisk. There was some shiny stuff in there so Stote and Name went to check things out.
Stote found a copper crown with malachite that was worth about 75 G and Name found some insight.
See you next week.
Dungeon, dungeon, dungeon – 3/13/21 – 4/3/21 – 3c
2021-03-13 Uh oh, I’m Off the Patch
10th day, 20th Krythorn 1492 DR – No Bells (Cuz we’re in the dungeon)
We quickly did a treasure recap inclusive of:
The ‘circlet of changing’ which came from the goblin in the market we destroyed. (50P from Aquilonia)
The glowing globe that we found in the basilisk (literally)
The copper and Malachite Circlet (75 G)
We kicked around the HP and Nadja‘s apparent frailty and the value of gold when we cut away to Willow.
Willow was at the greenhouse where he has actually determined that Falia is a hermaphrodite! There was a knock at the door (it’s the pigs, someone cried and we all hit the floor). Turns out it was for Willow so Falia fetched him. Willow sauntered (sashayed?) to the door to find a Drow who said he came from the Yawning Portal with a message from Name and Ebon to join them there. Forgetting for a moment that Stote and Name are known to overpay for all sorts of things, Willow bid him/her adieu and grabbed a cab to the Portal.
We wrapped up our short rest and fixed Nadja‘s hit points and identified the globe above as a “DriftGlobe” – Look it up bitches – and we started to wander again.
Willow arrived at the YP at about 11 bells and the place was starting to get a bit busier. Wanting to mingle more with the group than the customers. Willow headed down into the dungeon. Following the ‘signs of Ebon’ to the north, Willow was distracted in his searching by s a whispered summons from the darkness.
Stote snuck on down the hall and Ebon stumped along behind. They found a room (did you think I forgot how rare they are Bill?) but there were also two hallways to counter the elation. (As well as a pretty horrific smell)
After taking a quick mouseketeer roll call, and very little precaution, Stote headed further into the room and then north.
Nadja, in the meantime, went to check out the local smorgasboard. Aquilonia remembered great big gobs of greasy grimy manticor meat and Name figured it was laid out a bit too nicely for just staging Manticore Slop so he began taking some precautions.
Meanwhile Willow, still following the whispered summons, encountered a pretty spidery lookin’ Drow creature and, after a few disheartening words, decided to play along to see where this chap would lead. Just as well as another one showed up from behind him and off they all went.
The party in the meantime, discovered that the meat might have been feeding whomever kept carving these tunnels, (Really – Tunnels Bill? c’mon call a spade a spade -Thank you Bruce for calling him to the matt on this as well).
Ebon and Stote continued on down the ‘hhaaaaallllway’ and ended up having another talk with the walls that seemed to be lookin’ for a little pussy.
After calling everyone down to hear what they couldn’t hear, the front-runners made the decision to make more hallway. Quickly tiring of that and knowing there is more than enough of this already, we headed down to the final area on this level.
Mr Peekers (Stote) whent first, of course and, after an initial discovery of slightly more hallway, Stote found a room to the north. Ebon and Stote searched around a bit and found a copper tankard that might have some value although it didn’t smell very precious.
We got to what might be the final room and found that the door was being held by a dead (and decaying) female dwarf. In the room was a burglar’s pack missing only a few things.
Sooo… it looks like the virtual pegging isn’t done yet, as Bill took a shot at Bruce and they sorted some stuff out.
When I got my dad squared away, I returned to find we had moved down to the second level. We continued our earlier explorations by starting in a large room in the south. There was some sort of pump that Ebon used to ‘test the water’. That was all at first so Stote headed north with Aquilonia, while Ebon and Nadja headed south.
Just then, the system crashed, and so it seems the gods themselves have aligned to say here is where we shall stop.
2021-03-20 Big ass map
The date is First-day, 21st Kythorn, 1492 DR and we are on the second level.
A bit of wrangling got us all aligned on opening the north door which, on our previous adventure, had been stuck. Ebon was able to apply a shoulder key and get things opening up.
Although Ebon seemed to think we should enter with some caution, somehow Stote misunderstood and thought we should charge in all Simone Biles-ish but landed a bit more Chris Farley-ish.
Upon stumbling into the room, Stote found a costumed Hallistar look-alike mixing potions and sech. As soon as this HLA saw Sote he said “Terrible, Painful, Magical death. Fireballs and lightning bolts. Begone.”
Ebon poked his head in and was able to determine that this was some sort of construct and not the real thing. Heaving the door the rest of the way open, he gave Aquilonia sufficient room to look in as well.
Nadja and Name continued to close the distances.
Bruce and Bill went off for another tryst. Bill returned
Stote continued across the room and Ebon charged in and tackled the construct, which replied with a mumbling death throw about no one finding the cure for filth fever.
The rest of us entered the room as Ebon tried to stomp out his flaming adversary. Failing somewhat, the part split up as the flames continued to expand and engulf the supplies on the table which burnded up with a wonderful smell and tremendous billowing of black smoke.
While Name, Nadja, and Aquilonia closed the southern door and waited a bit for the smoke to douse the flames, Stote and Ebon went to find more hallway. Well, that was easy.
They opened a door to the north to the north and found a smallish room with the remains (literally) of a small party’s camp – including the small party’s remains.
Meanwhile Name and Aquilonia, about a day’s journey away from Nadja, caught the sound of scuffing feet in the far hall.
Not comfortable in a room, Stote decided to find more hallway while Ebon explored.
Back in the South, Name went a bit south the see what could be seen, and low and behold, round the corner comes our old drow friend Tripod and a spidery lookin Drow named Shun. A few other unfriendly types poked around as well. Aquilonia and Nadja held their ground.
Stote and Ebon decided to head back and….
Shunn indicated that Zachel (tripod) and he had one of our party (Willow) back at their headquarters and, if we ever wanted to see them again, we would need to find some wererats in the South and get an item back from them. Name grudgingly agreed, but thought fondly of a future comeuppance. Aquilonia and Nadja held their ground and wondered what Name was up to.
Stote and Ebon continued back towards the party at ridiculous speed.
Name move back and ‘splained to Aquilonia and Nadja with emphasis on the kill them after we get Willow back.
Coffee, Donuts, Elk Totem, Usain Bolt….
Name ‘splained to Stote and Ebon the same as Aquilonia and Nadja. Stote tried futily to track them. Name however thought that perhaps they were to the North east based on a bunch of factors and an ok history check.
We now start cruising around the dungeon at ridiculous speed and quickly headed to the North East
Opening a door, we found a room with a diarrhea, chessboard, chest, and painting of Yek, Dead Yek, and a baby goblin.
Stote said fuck that baby G and went to check out the chess set and decided to see if he could get it to attack. He could not.
Ebon moved in and tried to comfort the baby G who indicated that Yek had been killed by the Xanathar Guild.
Name came in and made a tremendously funny joke at Yek’s expense, and then moved on to check out the chest. It turns out to be Sammy Hagar’s treasure chest, which (after a bit of doing) opened up to present the party with 2,000 Silver. The diarrhea had costume jewelry worth 15 total. The chess set didn’t really fit so we took the pieces and hid the board.
The party continued their search for Shunn and his ilk and quickly moved to the 4 way intersexual, hiomosection, intersection. From there we continued North.
We reached a large hallway where some bugbear guards gave us a quiz about eye – look like 1 was the wrong answer. Since they invited us to trigger a poison dart trap, it looks like it;s clobberin’ time.
Name started things off by hitting, missing, inspiring, missing, surging, killing and missing again.
Aquilonia did a bit of damage with a fire bolt.
Nadja set up her spirit guardians but didn’t really get to do any damage with them.
Ebon chopped the second bugbear a bit but left a little for Name tio finish.
Stote started blocking all the holes for the dart trap.
Name killded the second bugbear and then, when they were going to look for the trigger, another bugbear chucked the old ‘flaming javelin’ down the hallway.
And that’s where we stopped.
2021-04-03 – We’re always fools
The date is First-day, 21st Kythorn, 1492 DR and we are on the second level. (You can’t hear the bells down here)
After an incredibly efficient and herculean effort, Bill got the Spirit Guardians all fixed for Nadja so….
She canceled them in favor of a Bless spell.
Aquilonia looked for a trigger for the trap we were on, but found none.
Ebon ran forward and found a different way to locate trap triggers – trigger them.
Stote was able to note the trigger plates on the floor where Ebon had triggered the trap.
Now the end of the hall starts filling up with various thugs who seemed ok, as they didn’t make mincemeat out of Ebon.
Name shot tow from the end of the hall and thanked them for their Javelin.
The bugbear mistook my sarcasm for genuine thanks (one must be Sheldon) and gave two more javelins to Ebon who was pretty critical of one.
Nadja felt enough was enough and started trimming down the ranks and then fondled her chest until she remembered a second level spell.
Bill again showed us why he is the dungeon ‘master’ and re-aligned the grid with the map.
Aquilonia sprinted further down the hall and was attacked by more darts.
Ebon quaffed a bit of healing and I got him better results by quoting Clue. He dodged a trap with a long jump and raged a bit (he’s got anger issues).
Stote added a litany of stuff to his shot and did some damage to the lead bugbear, but didn’t put him down.
They went and did a bit of damage apparently rolling poorly for the crit damage.
Name took out one (thought he could take out two, but just the one.
El tiempo de la bugbear.
Nadja rang one’s bell and took some darts to the ass as she moved down the hallway.
Please please me whoa yeah, like I please you
Dun du Dhun! He cast faggot fire, which got Ebon but missed Nadja (must not have been lezbian fire)
Aquilonia got everyone worked up thinking that Fire ‘bolt’ was Fire ‘ball’ and then she yells for everyone to stay to the right (must have heard sirens and lights)
Ebon leaped forward and landed in front of them, landed superman style, and started chopping them up.
Stote moved down the hall a leaping dancing ball of death. He took out the thug in front of Shun (Peekaboo)
Es el tiempo de las thugos – They did a bit of damage to Nadja but failed to break her rock solid concentration. On three tries
Name wanted to move forward but couldn’t seem to spot the trap so attacked Shun from a distance
Es el tiempo de las bugo-bearos – Bit of damage to Ebon – bit of resistance. Bit more of both and finally a bit more of both.
Nadja cast Spirit Guardians but only shielded Ebon.
Shun moved away and shot Nadja through a crowd of bugbears and cost her her concentration. But, through inspiration, and more effort on Bill’s part, she still failed.
Aquilonia then fireballed (nope). But the lightning bolt worked just as well – shocking!
Ebon decided the hall was a bit crowded and started thinning things out by killing two in a round.
Stote picked a good spot to attack the drow and shotted him well.
XT5 got a little piece of Nadja – no not that kind.
Name used the opening Stote left to kill Shun (with a little inspiration) and now he can live his afterlife out with Zachel.
One of the bugbears tried to drag away our corpe
Nadja took out her thug and then went to kick that draggin bugbear’s ass.
Shun got to bleed a while
Aquilonia moved forward but got dinged by the darted for little physical but much poison damage. She then firebolted Shun, and killed him more.
Ebon then hit everything but the guy he should have been aiming at and had to redo everything and attack again. He hit the bugbear a little and then hit Shun a lot.
Stote, sensing the minor disturbance in the force which was Shun’s passing, focused on the bugbear and took him out as well.
Name spent his whole turn moving cuz he failed to see the giant bugbear hidden behind Nadja.
Nadja however could see the bugbear and quickly made sure that no one else would ever need to again (except maybe the cleaning crew).
Aquilonia just rested a bit.
Ebon continued to attack Shun, seeing as how he recognized him from Yagra’s death.
Stote and then Name just eased on down the hallway.
As the team regrouped and healed, Ebon continued to make hamburger out of Shun (Shun burger?)
We found ourselves in the crate and barrel area of the dungeon (Joe loves that place)
As Ebon was coming down from his fury, Name was heading down…to check out the south. It’s another crate and barrel (Ebon loves that place too).
Nadja started doing the healing thing and healed Ebon.
We all headed south and into the holiday inn express.
Name oved forward to the next hallway while the rest of the party checked out the grub and bear.
Name suggested we check out the rest of the area and Stote agreed.
As Stote neared the homosection, intersexual, intersection to the south, we discovered more opponents. As one tried to sneak around and attack Stote Name turned it into paste.
Stote did his ‘Simone Biles’ and found a bunch of trouble just around the next corner. He pulled a stab and dash (very swashbuckly of him) and called for some aid.
Aquilonia charged in (Charged in?, Charged in?) and cast firebolt.
This started a trend of the spellcasters as the front line (Guess I wasn’t reading the same combat guide) and Nadja headed south.
Ebon followed suit and at least that was kinda normal.
Thugs started to pour in from the north as well and our friend Tripod (Zachel) was leading ’em in.
I thought we were going to end there, but Bill wanted to take a piece of Nadja with him. She made her saving throw and so we get to continue next week.
Robbed, Accused, and a little DotMM – 5/1/21 – 5/15/21 – 3c
2021-05-01 – Not really sure…but
Great summary Steve
Second-day, 22nd Kythorn, 1492 DR (2 Bells) and we are in the Yawning Portal. Having spent enough time bragging about our recent conquests below and getting ‘shushed’ for our troubles…
We began to seek food for our bellies and ale for our…bellies as well.
We ordered something with meat and got stew. Name held off but everyone else seemed to enjoy the grub.
When we finished we took a dray back to Trollskull where Name ordered a hammish sandwich with a side of bacon. That was enough to stop Stote and Ebon who heard the magic B word.
Stote, ever the one to notice males, saw there was some in the bucket. Yay there’s a note from Roni.
As the folks headed to their rooms, Name stayed down to go through the mail. (Mostly sorting)
As Nadja and Ebon entered Nadja‘s room, they saw a cloaked but still sexy figure pawing through Nadja‘s negligee drawer. Trying to surprise her seemed futile as she whipped out a M84 and made good her escape.
Suddenly, I got a call from work and had to leave briefly. When I returned, I’m sure a bunch of gr8 stuff had happened, but nobody told me.
As Ebon raised the alarm, Name’s first thought was for the safety of …his fine clothes. He ran downstairs to find them safe and then quickly moved to check on the rest of the party.
Stote of the jungle planned to swing out onto the vines but changed his mind just after finding out that he was 30 feet off the ground.
I meta-gamed with Bill for a moment. Let’s see how that goes. – turned out pretty good.
Nadja peered longingly after the departing figure and then thought to lock up, but then remembered having locked up in the past. Checking her stuff, she discovered a letter with a mark on it representing the Black Viper, an assassin and cat burglar of some repute but unclear motivations.
Willow grabbed his beer and ran out to assist.
Nadja manages to keep her wits sufficiently to go and rouse Aquilonia who left her behind and headed downstairs.
Things began to become quite the hubbub on the 1st floor with Ebon and Stote reuniting over fond memories of bacon.
Willow, not to be so easily distracted by bacon, wondered what they might have been after and if the female assailant might be the female mage who attacked the manor.
With great foresight, but horrible peripheral vision, Name headed out into the streets to see what he could see (but only directly in front of and on the same plane as him).
Stote, on the other hand, managed to spot what appeared to be his assailant and he alerted Name and then attacked.
Name, knowing that this could be the guy who planned to damage his close, attacked as well.
Nadja continued downstairs to play show and tell with Ebon Willow and Aquilonia. Willow recalled the symbol from the new of the criers. The others recalled similar news as well.
Aquilonia, deciding that one round of running was a terrible way to wake up, plopped down on the couch for a break.
Ebon continued out into the street and with guidance from Stote managed to go all Flash on our assailant andd then switched over to Rick Flair and locked up on him.
Willow, gaining only partial benefit from Ebon’s Elk token ability (as Ebon left him in the dust like Dale Earnhart racing a Zamboni) still had enough in him to get to the street in time to see Ebon disappear from sight.
Stote and Name both got a little lift from Ebon passing like a breeze and continued down the street.
Nadja headed out after the group and Name advised where the group was around the corner.
The being that Ebon had did the old Stretch Artmstrong escape maneuver and he was able to try to get a short distance but Johnny (I mean Ebon) swept the leg. Then he swept the axe.
Willow hurried to catch up.
Name was able to round the corner and get off a warning shot before sinking an arrow deep in his???
Stote came down to apply a little of the old night-night subdual damage and was batting 500 until he used inspiration, then he dropped to 333.
The would-be assassin tried to cut his bowstring with some really dark knife and, failing that, pulled a Juliet and drank some freakin poison.
Nadja kept stumpin along trying to catch up and spare the dying.
Aquilonia blew Nadja‘s doors off (ok, not much of a feat) and rounded the corner to ogle the scene.
Ebon chucked a potion of healing into the blobby remains and managed to bring it back from over the brink of death to just in front the brink of death.
Willow rounded the corner as well. His Druidic training allowed him to recognize the creature as an abomination.
Name promised to buy Ebon a potion and then absolutely killed the shit out of it.
Much conversation ensued rehashing the above and Aquilonia tried to determine the nature of the blade and was able to determine it was a spell of low-ish level allowing the caster to create blades out of shadow.
Missed a bunch of stuff but heard about the challenges identifying the bow. While Name was more interested in getting Roni’s initials in his current bow, he felt confident that the cheapest way to identify this bow was to attune to it (Thanks Joe).
While Name was risking certain doom, the party searched the body and found 30GP and a diamond worth 300GP.
They also found an illusory image of Stote, very detailed, pretty recent, and definitely a marked for death kind of thing. It was a very good likeness though. There was a note that said, kill the son of Silverfrond.
The bow gives advantage on targeting if you have the time to focus as well as being a +2. Willow opined that it might be the same boyer that made Name’s bow. (Roni) Uh oh, Willow’s coming closer to the edge of …obviously Roni is well above suspicion so we’ll have to go check in with her in the morning. Now it’s off to my room to finally read that letter.
2021-05-08 – You can only fool half of the people…
Cuz’ that’s all that’s here…
Third-day, 23rd Kythorn, 1492 DR (6 Bells)
New Theme Music!!
Nadja awaoke much earlier than expected to some pretty loud noises. She remedied this by going back to sleep with the pillow over head.
Aquilonia reamined dead to the world (not literally, but she’s really tired).
Nadja‘s attempts to muffle outside sounds were foiled by her detection of someone creeping about in some attempt to be stealthy. Leaping nude from the bed, she managed to startle Willow who was slipping out to play with the androgynous vegetable girl next door, Fala.
Willow’s departure may have been sped by Nadja‘s state of dress, but regardless he was off to talk treacle.
Having taken care of bidness, Nadja headed down to see what was goin on on the street where we live.
Suddenly interested in the people across the street, Bill was forced to determine their random existence.
Suddenly, just as she had donned her freshest smelling clothes, she detected a pounding on the door. (It was not the wooba gooba with green teeth) but one of our veteran guards. He asked for an audience with Aquilonia to deliver a coffer.
Nadja offered to arouse Aquilonia.
…from her slumber, but questioned the need for being so arousing.
The guard, Barnaby, and Max, his younger assistant who, after some effort we confirmed, was not wearing his usual helmet.
Aquilonia was sawing logs and difficult to rouse, so Nadja tried to arouse her by making Aquilonia a little wet with a little slide of hand.
Finally getting Aquilonia aroused, Nadja and the guards had to wait while she put herself together.
A really long time later, they came down and collected the net earnings from the previous week. After we divvied it up…
A treatise of the clan of the worm – Aquilonia a brief history of the clan and it’s members – Mazrick (somebody)
Name awoke and got ready to come down – taking even longer than Aquilonia to get ready (but it’s worth it)
He schmoozed a bit with the guests and got his food came up to join the ladies
Name told the party of Roni’s dead ant, dead ant, dead ant…
Roni was able to tell of the bow and how powerful the magic of the strings were. Made form the hair of an elven maiden, the bow might be able to shoot around the corners (rumor). ‘The Xanathar’ may be holding such a maiden with the intent of making this bow for select assassins. Stote has likely made a powerful enemy.
Saeth Cromley (Sgt) and Barnabus (Blastwind) – Detectives from the city watch – (Barnibus is the small one) – When we first met them, some naer do wells (the Fine fellows of Daggerford) accused the group of murder most foul (Copper the dwarf we bought). During the investigation, it was found that TFFoD were actually thieves and murderers and now they are cooling their heels in jail. They were looking for ‘Rex the hammer’, a name we might have heard from Halith. Midna (She is one of the fine fellows, a dark elf that we tried to purchase, a priestess of Shar) Kellem the weasel was the rogue from the broom closet both accused us too. After a bit of haggling we agreed on 7GP as a reward for Rex – who we will go after next week.
Third-day, 23rd Kythorn, 1492 DR (12 Bells)
2021-05-15 Weeping 4 Willow
…Cuz he had to work
Fourth day, 24th Kythorn, 1492 DR (6 Bells)
Ebon and Stote slept really well, but awoke to find it’s never too late for bacon. (But, it was actually only 7 bells thanks to Bill’s excellently provided message of the day- Wow! what a read!)
Willow has been MIA since ho toddled of to see Fala yesterday (This means he is not yet a keyholder)
By 8 bells the group is assembled at our round table in the corner.
Mail call – a package for the ‘Mindflayers’ ( Name) contained a note from Barnabas Blastwind that alerted us to information gathered by their undercover agents, and from interrogations of the Fine Fellows of Daggerford, in the form of a map of the second level of the dungeon. There were notes in area 11 about Midna hiding and in area 3 Midna got cursed. There was no X representing the location of ‘Rex the Hammer’, so Stote suggested we go drown our sorrow in some ales at the portal.
We got to the YP before 11 bells and, while there was already live music, Durnan wasn’t there yet so we gave our best ideas for drink specials throughout the day such as a ‘Hour of Happiness’ and an ‘early arrivers’ special.
After enjoying our second breakfast and buying our supplies, we overheard some guy telling a funny tale of how his friends were killed and Stote took the opportunity to try to rub salt in the wound. While he didn’t seem to get a rise out of the group, we did catch the comment of ‘Nadja No-Beard’.
Spotting a surly looking dwarf hidden in the crowd (both surly and hidden by the crowd are sort of a given for dwarves) but Nadja didn’t mind these distractions and she literally slapped the taste out of his mouth (which went all over the guy next to him).
Turns out this guy – Ironbeard (formerly known as Rusty) knew Nadja from the past (When she ran with the IronAxe clan). Since they were having such a swell reunion, Nadja hit him again. Folks were taking bets on who would win Nadja, or the guy that doesn’t even matter enough to have a token. He did have a helmet though and tried to hit Nadja but she was just too naked (I mean quick) for him. Nadja gave him the old Benny Hill grapple but he broke free.
At 5 to one, Name (known round the YP as mindflayer) had made 3 copper
Nadja missed with the knockout move but then was inspired to miss the surrounding testicles and laid him out cold.
Tossing Rusty’s helmet down the portal Name spent his 3 copper on another round for Stote, Ebon and him and then added one for Nadja. Then it was time to go down on/in the portal.
After getting down to the second layer, we had some scaling issues, which were quickly fixed by Bill’s fine skills at modification.
Moving forward, we let Stote trigger the dart traps so we could see the refreshed marketplace. Now that Stote new what they felt like, he found the next one really easily…a little too easily so he looked around for others. After coming up with the ‘roll out the barrel’ approach, we made it to the southern door.
Continuing down to the East we (well Name) decided to split the party. He headed south while everyone else headed north. Ebon, wanting to avoid bad memories, went south as well.
Stote, Nadja, and Aquilonia opened a door to the west and were flooded over by a deluge from the room beyond. The foul smelling fluid washed over them. Stote kept his feet. Aquilonia was knocked down and slightly injured. Nadja was far enough back that she wasn’t affected. After the water receded, they could see a destroyed room with a dead wizard. They searched about and found a crystal wand underneath the corpse.
Ebon and Name continued to explore the Southern passage and found a mural of mages warping into one-eye demon creatures.
Nadja continued the search of the room and determined it may have been a lab of some type and Aquilonia surmised it was death by experiment gone wrong. Aquilonia took a closer look at the crystal wand and determined that, while not magical, it was worth about 25G.
Down South, since Name and Ebon knew Stote was on his way, they headed to the NE. Coming to a instersexual, homosection, intersection, and peeking around the corner, they observed a banquet table with a painting hanging over it, but Name could not make out the painting.
Aquilonia and Nadja continued to mosey up. Stote caught up and announced that the buffet was open. Name was not so certain and voiced his cautions and slowly approached the room. In addition to the banquet, there were some other mundane furnishings and a chair with something in the seat.
Aquilonia and Nadja kept schlepping towards us. Stote dashed forward to observe what vituals were available. Tossing a loaf of cinnamon bread back to Ebon, Stote ended his turn. Name moved in to check out the bookshelves (empty), the desks (empty), and the chair with a book and something else on it. Ebon was munching on the bread and headed in feeling fine until he saw the familiar visage of Hallaster was the picture over the table and the one on the wall as well. At that point, he spit out his bread. Stote made qa ham sammich. The ladies caught up. Name checked out the chair.
A quick check of the journal revealed Midna’s notes about her group although Name couldn’t figure out the other object. We finished up the journal, identified the object as a holy symbol of Shar, swallowed our food, and decided to head south.
Hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, inter, homo, intersection and then hallway, hallway, hallway. Finally, a room full of Dwarven tools in pretty good condition. Never being able to leave well enough alone, Stote and Ebon headed down to the end of the hallway and found a opening or gateway which seemed like the other ones we had seen and so, they thought it best, to see if they could go through. They couldn’t and Stote somehow got trapped. The portal did have an Elder Rune of Passage and not an Elder Rune of Stote gets stuck in the passage. Turns out the rune has both Bane and Boon effects. Stote appears to have been Baned. Aquilonia did not have sufficient knowledge to overcome the spell or even tell how long the condition would last. After determining that he could eat, we decided we could wait around to see if he poops himself.
And, that’s where we left it.
Robbed, Accused, and a little dungeoning – 5/22/21 – 6/12/21 – 4c
2021-05-22 We Might Have Heard Something
Fifth-day, 25th Kythorn, 1492 DR (6 Bells) – and yes Bill, I do care.
Stote is still stuck in the wall and we are trying hard not to make him feel too bad (not) but at least we haven’t hit him with an axe (yet).
Ebon translated mrphmrm mrfkr hrh as Stote saying, “Get me out of here”.
Nadja tried to guide Stote‘s ass out of the situation but that didn’t seem to work.
Ebon tried to tug one out (That was Stote, you pervs).
The group did observe that it seemed like Stote was constantly sighing or something in a lower than voice and this must have triggered something with Aquilonia cuz that’s when she told us it would wear off in about 24 hours. – Long Rest –
Well Stote is free, or at least as cheap as he’s ever been. While we heard him droning, he had been hearing us buzzing – Metagaming alert – time stop spell effect –
A bit of debate and we go south, then west and it’s time for Dusty Rooms. This included Dusty Lab and Dusty Kitchen.
Stote saw a note on the door and went to check it out but got attacked by the pots and pans. We rolled initiative cuz we’re not gonna take any shit off any unruly pots and pans.
Most everyone else went to the lab to the North while Name went to check out the pots. He shot the closest and then the farthest, and the pots responded by attacking. Name did finally pull the lid off a pot on the stove and found out that there were ghosts inside.
The pots retaliated and hit a couple times but then Ebon came around the corner and chopped the ghost thing to death (after a bit of pulling out) and all of the pots crashed to the floor.
Having defeated the dishes, we moved on to investigate the room to the north. Things were going pretty normal, we found a spellbook and a chest which shot a lightning bolt into Ebon.
There was a ‘broken’ summoning circle underneath the rug, which both Aquilonia and Nadja could understand, but we decided not to fix it.
Ebon opened the chest and found a note that advised one not to spend this retirement fund on ale.
We found more mundane stuff and a sock of questionable purpose, and then Name talked everyone into fixing the summoning circle to see what it might summon. Aquilonia began the repair and Nadja readied a Bless and then…
A Calashite appeared in the circle and punched Aquilonia in the nose. The stranger then firebolted Ebon which began his end.
Stote grappled him successfully and Nadja ’caused wounds that almost killded him. Almost is just not good enough, so Name finished the job.
We decided after killing him that questioning him might be wise, so Nadja ‘spared the dying guy’ and we stripped him and bound him and took his Spellbook which was wayyyyy better than the shitty one we found earlier.
We questioned the guy, who turned out to be Calabash who was trapped in a pocket dimension perhaps because he drinks too much, perhaps because he spent the retirement fund on booze. He didn’t know much about much else. We warned him not to mess with the fine fellows of daggerford. We robbed the heck out of his room and left him to his own devices. (Well having been in a PD for 120 years)
We continued to explore to the north and found the map to be very accurate. Another portal was found in area 6, and Stote and Ebon approached with much more caution.
Since it had a vending machine sort of logo, Ebon put a Gold in the slot and the portal began to hum. As Ebon went to step through, he noticed a rune (Korombos) but also heard the voice we had heard before warning him that he was not yet strong enough. a quick check of fate and Ebon agreed.
Nadja, who had been watching the hall and Ebon as he passed her, both heard somber harpsichord music coming from the south (hallway, of course).
Upon entering S, E, and N saw a harpsichord playing on its own. It appears to be somewhat normal but the key and decorations are made of bone.
Nadja noted some musical notes on the wall and as she went to read them the music stopped. After reading them though, Nadja felt she could play them and gave it a whirl. Apparently not a good whirl. She flowed through the song like a virtuoso but finished the final note more like a vitu-bozo. As the sour note resonated within the chamber, she watched as her hands withered away to bone.
The damage was heal-able but the skeleton fingers would take a bit more to ‘restore’.
Ebon, never one to learn from other’s mistakes, decided he would give it a whirl and what a whirl. It was as if he was channeling the spirit of Motzart himself (if this was Earth, and if this was after Mozart had been alive for channeling) as he finished and the beauty of his sonnet faded from the air, the Skull clicked open and a scroll was revealed.
Turned out to be a scroll of raise dead. Nadja decided to hold onto it for use in the future.
Rather than heading up to the portal – we headed over towards area 7. We were amazed by the fact that the first thing we encountered was a room. It looked impeccable and smelled horrible.
After S and Name got all balmed up, the party investigated and found some equipment and notes that indicated things like “rate of decay and “accumulation of charge”. Wer also found a journal that was mostly destroyed, but we were able to read the first page, which said…”Day 1: Halaster has granted me this abandoned copper mine in the Arcane Chambers. Finally, I have access to the components needed for my experiments.”
Not being big readers or really caring about rates of decay, we moved on.
Stoe discovered a room with 19 barrels and a humming door.
Ebon, ever the cautious one, decided to open the door. He was shocked to find a…oh wait, he was shocked first and then he found a room with copper plates on the floor.
Next week we’ll see what ‘accumulation of charge’ really means….
2021-05-29 – There shall be Unity
Fifth day, 25th Kythorn 1492 DR (9 Bells`ish)
Ebon, reminded of the copper plates, heard a humming in the room.
Stote suggested a pola and Ebon rolled out a barrel, or at least was going to when…. something AT&T’d his ass (reached out and touched him). They were ghouls.Although their tokens look a lot like bald Gene Simmonses.
Ebon got hit first but did ok.
Aquilonia then got damn near ripped to shreds by her first opponent while Bill reset that ‘Fixed, max damage’ setting. (It’s ok, we know). To prove it, another ghoul missed twice.
Stote got missed, mostly. That cloak keeps returning dividends.
Ebon did not kill with a single blow, so he blew him again and that did it.
Stote finally went and decided not to marry his opponent (disengaged) and then attacked one of the ghouls on Aquilonia.
Aquilonia also decided she did not want to marry a ghoul and also disengaged.
Name then engaged the same two ghouls and showed them the meeting of ’til death do us part, twice’.
Then, Willow did something with Bill.
Nadja, in today’s episode played byBrandi, cast heal on Aquilonia.
The ghouls ganged up and tried to hit Ebon, but found out that even though he was big, he was nimble.
Ebon then nimbly attacked and did some heavy damage. He decided to make it heavier and the extra weight was just enough.
Stote shot the shit out of one of them and then Aquilonia came in for the kill steal.
Name came across the room and planned on killing one but even with inspiration could only hit once.
Willow then showed up as a wolf-like creature and changed back into Willow.
Nadja, having been only slightly frightened by Willow Wolf, healed Aquilonia again.
Finally, as if it were a last request to the gods, the ghoul managed to hit Ebon not just once but twice.
Ebon repaid him by making sure it was indeed, a last request.
However, something then happened to Ebon that made his hair look even worse than normal.
Stote yelled out that it was a magic missile or something.
Willow then got lost in the darkness but recovered enough to move into the room and gain the full impact of line of sight (good or bad).
Then my brother called for like the 30th time about Disney tickets and when I came back Ebon had been blown the hell up by a lightning bolt.
Nadja stumped on into the room to Willow warning her not to line up. Nadja transferred some of her life to Ebon and suffered the penalties.
Stote moved next to the door and waited lethally.
Aquilonia moved into the room and maybe stubbed her toe. (Not sure what dag-nabbit meant.)
Name moved to the door and, not being able to see anything, moved back.
Ebon went all ‘wild and crazy guy’, and charged into the room.
Willow, stripped of the ‘RetConned’ movement bonus from days gone by, drew his weapon and waited.
Ebon was observing that the electrical pulses he was feeling seemed to be healing his opponent.
Nadja again went into the room to help out and cast healing word on Ebon.
Noone ever yells out what’s going on!
Stote drew his bow and charged in as well. He shot whatever it was and then got back outside of LOS.
Aquilonia moved down closer to the room.
Turns out that Ebon is fighting a Flesh Golem, which attacked, and critted and then hit again, but Ebon resisted.
Name charged in describing the room as he entered.
Ebon attacked again and continued to do damage and then moved back into a straight line with Name.
Willow moved into the room as well. He glanced around for switches or something but didn’t see anything notable.
Nadja noted the creature to the South, appearing like a skull coated in metal, cast electricity onto the floor which damaged the party, took down Ebon (again) and seemed to heal the flesh golem (metagamer says Duh). As she considered fleeing (is everyone Stote.) Name yelled out we’re committed to the combat, heal Ebon. She cast heal at third level. At first, Bill rolled and that somewhat poorly so Brandi used inspiration and almost doubled the healing.
Stote came, popped into the room, and shot the skull thing.
Aquilonia moved into the room and, at the limits of motion, then Misty Stepped onto a destroyed table in the center of the room.
The Flesh Golem, sensing Ebon’s revitalization decided to de-vitalize him again.
Name moved south and took out the Skull thing.
Ebon, regaining his feet and reorienting on the situation, decided there’s no golem like a dead golem attacked again. Due to his mostly dead status, he missed the first time (due to teleporting shit dice) but managed to hit with the second attack.
Willow moved up to give Ebon additional healing although he was gravely injured himself. In fact, both Willow and Nadja were fairly cooked.
Here Bill made a comment about them looking like blackened shrimp and I advised that Nadja actually is a blackened shrimp. Then Bill figured out he wasn’t recording.
Nadja some healing over to
Stote drank his mystery healing potion.
Aquilonia fireballed the Flesh Golem but it didn’t go down…still.
FG attacked Ebon, who complained a bit about other targets of opportunity. Once again, he absorbed a bunch of damage.
Name moved North, again giving the group a good example of talking to the combat, fell a bit short, misty stepped up to the golem and killed the golem…twice.
Ebon gave Name the bearhug of rage (but with control).
Stote came up and overkilled.
Ebon and Willow fondled each other and made all friendly.
Name suggested they go south for a place to camp but, while he was putting his dad away, Stote went south and found out that the south smelled sort of ‘undeady’ so we decided to camp in room 7b.
We found a note in a hammock that said “Day three: I no longer trust the other apprentices. What they see as mysticism I know to be science. I can’t stand their incantations and their mutterings any longer.If any of them try to intrude on my laboratory again; they’re in for a truly shocking surprise!”
Stote decided to test the hammock and passed out almost instantly.
As the rest of us continued to fortify the room and found that, three of the barrels were filled with copper nuggets that Name valued at 300GP.
Willow and Nadja almost wore themselves out healing and then we all rested.
It is now probably six-day.
As we woke up, Ebon and Stote started a mild debate about ‘Rectum the hammer’. And Stote sought a way to improve our chances of finding Rex in a more rapid fashion (guess he really wants that 7 gold).
Willow produced a package that had been given to him that should assist in providing guidance. Turns out that it was some of Rex’s old clothes (Eww). Willow also has the ability to change into a bloodhound and perhaps lead the way.
Next week, we’ll find out where he leads us….
2021-06-05 – Joe thinks it looks small
Sixth day, 26th Kythorn, 1492 DR Unknown Bells cuz we be down below….
I have decided that, if given three wishes, one of them would be that my dick could be as long as my notes.
Bill opened the evening by reminding us that he can be stingy about rations by having Name remind folks of this shortfall in a weak attempt to sew dissention in the ranks. He then foiled his own attempt by reminding the party that there was a well a few rooms back.
Stote decided to head back alone, Nadja gave him guidance, and he was off.
Heading back towards the well, Stote encountered a smell near the well, what the hell, t’was a Grell. He wanted to move but had to wait for initiative to Forrest Gump his way out of there. He did this quite silently giving us, yet again, no idea of what was happening.
Once Stote made it all the way back to the party he decided, apparently in hushed tones, to tell the party what was going on until Bill reminded him that Ebon couldn’t hear. He laid out the plan to go kill the Grell and we all figured, we might as well…swell.
Some discussion was had about calling out combats and sech and then Stote went to move forward and Bill determined that we should roll initiative and get with the program.
We began to move in turn and both Nadja and Ebon moved forward in total disregard of Stote‘s instruction to hang back.
As we came around again, Nadja took point for a ‘short’ time. Then Stote moved up and (of course) out paced her.
As the rest of us move north to the well room where Stote and Ebon were fisting, Nadja wondered if Beyonce might have been here (was there anything to the left, to the left?)
Stote moved into the room and checked the well.
A great comedy bit ensued and we determined Bill was recording.
Both Name and Ebon got to pumping and found that it didn’t take either of us very long (figures).
Since Bill seemed to think we was thirsty cuz all we been drinking is ale, he advised that our water skins only held 500 ml.
We then berated the stupid who cannot pronounce things.
Willow went all scooby doo on us and, after a bunch of figuring, we found out that yes/no was about all he could deal with so we headed north and east.
After a bit of travel, we found the Grell again and Stote immediately shot it regardless of line of sight. Bill complained and Stote moved forward and placed favored foe on the Grell.
Stote and Ebon attacked and the grell charged in to return the favor.
Aquilonia firebolted both the Grell and herself butSam caught it and Bill fixed it.
Name came up and killded the shit out of the Grell and Scooby Willow came over and indicated (with the help of his translators) that we should get the beak.
Ebon went to hack it off and did it well enough that Scooby went all wavy tail on us.
Then it was off to find Rex, in literally a roundabout way, through the market and sech.
As we rounded a corner Name’s arm flared up with a blue light that both damaged him and pissed him off. It seemed to emanate from a sigil on his arm. At the same time a blue light appeared to spring from his eyes.
When he went to call out to Willow (yeah I know i said Rex, but I meant Willow) Name could see up the hall and his torch seemed very bright. He sheathed his sword and found that he could see.
The Sigil remained, as did the vision.
Nadja threw a heal on Name and Aquilonia and Nadja checked it out and was able to determine…diddly. Nadja however, was able to determine that this was a ‘spell scar’. Spell scars are passed down through certain lineages and only few can master them. She went on to say that these were remnants of the spellplague in 1385DR.
After learning this, Name decided he might have to find out more about his lineage, which had never been much interested in…Until now.
Since the sigil didn’t seem to be hurting any more (for now).
As Willow proceeded, we were reminded that he hasn’t seen enough hallway yet. OMG – he has found the longest hallway ever. (Hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway, hallway)
Then, Willow stopped. He seemed disturbed by something and Stote went ahead to investigate. He found giant dicks, err ticks.
Name , thanks to his no stunning vision (Oh thank you, thank you, thank you) was able to attack and lay some heavy damage onto the Rust Monster (combat tracker Bill).
The second rust monster charged Nadja who was covered in delicious chain mail but he used all of his action getting there.
Name cut it to pieces and then moved forward.
Stote surged ahead and killeded the first one, which was the second one in death order.
Looking around the room it was a festhall covered in bas-reliefs of dwarves singing and drinking. (But statis)
Willow continued North down some stairs and then stopped, as he seemed to sense something.
Stote moved forward stealthily and Ebon followed non-stealthily which caused a brief discussion on stealth vs non-stealth.
Willow moved to the door to the East and indicated that this might be the way that Rex had gone.
Stote (first) and then everyone else were able to hear a sound like a Ho (no a rake Ken Jennings). Stote picked the lock and then moved back. Name peaked in and saw three creature, which he knew to be Nothics. A particularly nasty little beast with a gaze attack that rotted opponents.
Name snuck back out and updated the party. They came up with a pretty good plan – throw open the door, move into the room, surprise their opponents and kick ass.
Here’s how it went – threw open the door and surprise, one was right in front of us.
Name moved in and called out the room, attacked and damaged the one that was right there. Ebon came in and finished the job.
Nadja, going with the plan, moved south to blind two of them and seemed successful.
One moved forward directly and gazed at Nadja but she saved. Then came the clawing, which hit one out of two but couldn’t break Nadja‘s iron concentration.
The other two flailed about for a bit but then seemed to attune to other senses and started to move with a bit more purpose, closing in on Nadja but failing to align to attack.
Stote moved in, threw a dagger at one, and hit. Switching targets, he hit again. Chipping away at the stone.
Aquilonia hit all three of them with a scorching ray and left them scorched.
Name moved down and attacked the one with sight. A miss, inspiration, another miss 🙁 A hit and some damage and then Serge and the little twist was enough to score the kill.
Ebon, deprived of his target of choice, came down running and gunning like Husien Bolt had learned the javelin.
Nadja decided this was a great opportunity to use her ax and gave the one closest a choppy choppy. Indeed, her axe was great. And she moved forward to go toe to chest (she is pretty short)
Regardless of when they were supposed to save, they still failed 🙂 and failed to hit as well.
Stote gunned another knife into the remaining Nothis and moved back.
Aquilonia went with the Firebolt this time around and found their blindness to be to her advantage.
Willow dog felt comfortable moving into the room.
Name snuck in and whispered death to the Nothic and indeed, he did.
The north and south walls had shelves holding rotting dwarven boots and little else.
Willow-dog moved off to the east and we followed.
Passing through a 4-way intersexual, homosection, intersection and and into a room that seemed to have a wall of skeletons splitting it.
Stote was concerned about the homo, inter, inter that we passed, he went back to investigate when Ebon heard sounds of combat from the hallway to the east.
We continued east and then north as the combat sounds drew us onward. As we approached a turn to the south where it looked like the ceiling had partially collapsed, we could clearly discern both voices in common and the snarling reply of creatures unknown.
Ebon moved forward and saw some overturned carts and more Nothics. He signaled back to the group and we moved into the room.
Name moved into the room and targeted a Nothic with his bow and, while only seeming to hit once, was inspired to fix that and killded one of the Nothics.
Ebon took position behind an overturned cart of copper ore and decided to throw a couple javelins but failed to hit with either.
The ‘fly with a pitchfork’ thing looked our way and speaking in some strange language caused things to go dark around Ebon.
Aquilonia moved in and …vanished into the darkness (although we think she is going down).
Stote moved into the room and shot the FWP.
The second nothic moved into the combat that was already underway to the south. We could not see what happened but could hear the misses (not the missus).
Nadja moved in and after getting a quick breaking news update, cast dispel on the darkness. Tada – it is gone but awww Aquilonia is not going down.
Willow came into the room and changed back into Willow as a boner action. He called out that someone to the south was ‘our boy’ and then Bill ran out of gas.
See you next week…
2021-06-12 I’m Starving (Wait, that’s Bill)
Seventh day, 27th Kythorn, 1492 DR Unknown Bells cuz it’s a dungeon…
I got a bonus inspiration and gave it to Nadja cuz she’s an available slot.
The combat continues to the south and we can hear someone almost as cocky as Stote taunting his opponents.
Name opened the volley by shooting the Nothic engaged with ‘Taunty Man’.
Ebon did more decathlete stuff (running and ‘javelining’). He hit with both and while confident that his two javelins should have slain every creature in the dungeon, just did damage.
FlyWithPitchfork seemed to furrow his little brow and pull another demon out of thin air. THe newcomer quickly missed Name twice since Ebon was doing some suckin’ up in the background.
Aquilonia moved down and tried to do a bit of damage but also missed.
Stote did some damage to FWP.
To the south, there were some screams of pain – Nadja was nonplussed.
Nadja moved south and took some measurements and then tolled the dead, but the creature saved. Nadja was a bit miffed, and summoned a spiritual weapon (She chose axe) and did some damage.
Willow, now back in Druid form, caused Bill to study for a moment, as he doesn’t want Name to have Druid abilities. Then he Ice knifed the whole group of us. (At least now we know why he didn’t let me play Willow.
The guy to the South kill-stole the nothic without even so much as a thank you and he moved forward to FWP.
Name opened with Crit but then missed with a crit as well. He chose to seek inspiration but instead was inspired to duplicate the crit miss.
Ebon, figuring Name would eventually hit again for massive damage, went south to help our ungrateful ally. He slew the FWP and didn’t get so much as a peep of thanks.
The creature in front of Name farted some noxious gas, which hung in a cloud over Name , Aquilonia, Stote, and Willow. (It’s probably some trick to get them each to blame the other). He then teleported to a safe distance so he would not be blamed.
Aquilonia tried a set of scorching rays, but ended up with just a near scorch. The guy down south complained.
Stote attacked and did enough damage to determine that the farting foe was a bad bith.
Nadga missed with her crossbow and told everyone to drop their weapons (no one did).
Willow (wouldn’t do that), (Wouldn’t do that either), (Nope, not that either). Maybe the ice knife again now that noone is around, and he doesn’t even have to move to miss…until Nadja grants war gods blessing for a kewl +10 and converted it to a hit.
Turns out (suprise suprise) the guy to the South is Rex the Hammer. He will drop his blade for no man, or woman, or dwarf. And he attacked Ebon. Twice. And then surrendered.
Name felt that at least someone should retaliate and so…he retaliated…twice.
Ebon and Name chatted about overkill for a bit and Name promised not to kill Rex the next time.
Ebon then surged across the room and killed the whatever the hell it was with a Javelin. WooHoo.
After everything was dead, we searched everything and found plate mail on Rex as well as a shortbow and greatsword. We took all that was well as the copper and then found a potion of healing in the backpack that was a potion of healing and a silvered shortsword.
Nadja was able to determine that these creatures were Mezzaloths and surmised that they might have been placed here by Halaster.
We all decided to head out, stopping off real quick to skin some rust monsters. Then we decided to take one of the copper barrels with us as well. Ebon realized that it wasn’t the weight but the awkwardness of the load that would preclude carrying more.
Back at the portal….
The guards and Mirt were there and Mirt had a look of displeasure on his face (focused mostly on Name). After some words about honor and dishonor, Mirt asked for his sword back. While the rest of the group was ready to fight, Name surrendered the blade with little adieu.Nadja softened the blow by indicating that they had been using the sword to track him and his activities.
We went to get a drink but talked about pot for a while.
Then we sold all of our stuff and adjusted our rations.Then we talked about Air Fryers.
Then Bill whipped it out – an awesome linked map of Waterdeep that had pins linking up to bunches of locations and stuff for getting around town.
We meandered over to Trollskull and then did a bunch of paperwork for our ‘occupation of WaterDeep’. It covered the Magister that filled out our paperwork and Karn Silvermane who paid our immigrant tax. Some of the stuff was about our residence, available guilds and other stuff.
** While we were going through the paperwork, we noticed that Name’s name was listed as Tiras K. Tylmarande. (Aka Name Unk-nown). We found out that our taxes are a gold a year.
Name was going to find enchantment for his sword. Stote needed Elven boots. Ebon was going to learn a high-level portal spell. Nadja was looking for 2 platinum rings worth 50 gold each for one spell and needed to get horny for another spell. Aquilonia was going to review the spellbook and research a portal spell (in case Ebon failed). Willow was going to hang out with Fala, or get mugged, or who know’s…get hit by a bus.
Next time, we’re filling out the paperwork…. WTF?
Paperwork, Dungeon, and Sam’s Notes – 6/26/21 – 8/77/21 – 4.5c
2021-06-26 Mystery of the Missing Notes
It is Eighth Day, 28th Kythorn and we are going through the mail. It is Eight Bells.
Steve finally realizes that Stote, Nadja, and Ebon are like the Three Stooges and Aquilonia and Name are Marjorie White and Richard Fiske, respectively.
Among our papers was an invitation to the Cassalanter’s. Nadja remembered them as having been cruel because Esvele Rosznar said they were worse than her family.
Then we went shopping.
Ebon is still looking for a portal – but not really, but really.
Stote got freaked out about windows and indicated he’ll be avoiding them.
Willow, Aquilonia, and Name will be going to the Black Tower. Stote and Ebon will be going back to Aurora’s Adventure, in the Castle Ward, near the Hawk Man statue.
Just as we were getting ready to leave, there was a knock at the door (thanks Joe) and then a more insistent knock (thanks again joe) and finally, a meek voice yelled out that we weren’t obligated to open the door and that was the trigger to do just that. In walked Demetrius Feenbean, a city magister, and public defender. He advised he would be defending Rex the Hammer posthumously.
Ebon was going to do something and so a ping was requested.
Then Navi curled up all adorably.
Then Demetrius fell over a divan fleeing the imposing Ebon and displayed a taste for floral underwear.
After dashing around the room for a bit, Ebon made some highest comments that offended Demetrius because he didn’t know Irkie Timbers.
A comment on his floral derriere made him blush.
Stote fled for bacon.
Demetrius advised us that we could have been paid more for Rex if we had been a business.
As Name was discussing the business license, Ebon was terrorizing him with an offer of bacon. Name distracted him with a counter proposal of going to get his own bacon and Ebon departed.
Since it seemed like we had everything we needed from Demitrius, Name threatened him with the bacon and Demitrius fled the scene.
After a plentitude of bacon, we headed out. Stote outfitted himself with a few markings and articles of clothing that identified him as a ‘member’ of the guild that might be approached.
Going first to the Steam and Steel to check for Nadja. After introducing the group to Avi, a water Genasi Nadja was able to get the rings she needed and a bit of guidance on her spell. As we were leaving, Name suggested that we also meet her husband Embric a Fire Genasi, who offered his flaming hands.
Stote and Ebon encounters a strange woman who approached them from across the way most nimbly. Her movements were far more gracious than her cleanliness, and while her red hair wasn’t currently, one couldn’t help but harken to a memory of a little orphan Annie of about 13. She approached Stote, she addressed him by name. A bit of discussion and a curl of Ebon’s lip and the information flowed like sandpaper. After Ebon’s offer of ‘at any price’, Stote tried to counter with the cheapistan approach. He asked for information about his mother, which the waif then indicated would be costly information indeed. She explained that she did not want to cross the Xanathar but she could advise that Stote mother was in The Xanathar’s hideout, specific location unknown. Stote, not understanding that i typed that in capitals, failed to catch on to the fact that ‘The Xanather’ was also a person, as well as a group. When she tried to shy away from Stote who seemed unclear about the information, Stote made an attempt to touch her and she immediately flipped back on to a carriage landing so lightly that the occupants didn’t even notice.
Stote threw down a gold and waited for greed to take its toll. After a bit more back and forth, Stote got with the program and finally decided to buy her breakfast. She indicated that they should all jump on the same dray that the Aquilonia part of the group was going to board but Stote shied away, much to the new girl’s shagrin. Stote tried to Errol Flint the thing with a wink and a nod, nudge nudge, say no more, say no more, but apparently, Name isn’t a goer so he didn’t get it.
LOA jumped deftly on to the approaching dray and Stote followed suit. Ebon deftly stepped in front of the dray and got the ‘I’m not busy discount’. Finally, we get LOA’s real name, which is Greta. Ebon introduced himself as Karen. The story continued to unfold in a very confused fashion but found that Greta knew Yagra and some other guy who was also dead. Once their dray got to Coffinmarch by the City of the Dead, they all got out and…
Back in normal town, Aquilonia, Name, and Nadja have arrived at the Tower of the Order. Aquilonia got several spells out of the book, we got the chance to see Quilem again, and he greeted us excitedly while hiding the book he was writing in. Aquilonia lured him out from behind the counter with the old distant handshake. He greeted Aquilonia and Nadja as good friends and they in turn introduced Name. When it was explained that they were there for a portal spell. After some researching, Quillem suggested the Dimension Door spell but that only would work for one, going one way, at a limited distance. The Arcane Gate seemed to be closer to what we might need, but still limited to 500 ft. Since he seemed like we might not be able to get the portal together, Name asked Ferdinand about getting the weapon enchanted. So, it was off to the enchantery.
Back in crazy-town, Ebon and Stote are still following Greta to points unknown. They entered a coffinry, Greta signaling the elder that worked there. Stote threw him a silver, and then Ebon butchered the same signal. Stote flipped him another silver that the man caught with the same dexterity. Stote followed the impatient Greta through a portal coffin, but Ebon shied away. Stote and Great moved forward their way lit by a small candle Greta needed to light her human way. They continued deeper into the warren and Greta stopped to deliver a message to a small boy to have some others up ahead clear out. After a moment, they moved forward into a small bunk room for children.
Ebon, still trusting his fate to well…fate, finally entered the coffin with the guidance of the old man. With all of the stealth that we have come to respect Ebon for, he was able to locate Stote and Greta. Finally, Greta spilled the beans. She explained that ‘The Xanathar’ was a beholder (look it up) and more than that, an Eye Tyrant. After a bit more backstory, including her involvement in the Trollskull attack, for which she apologized, Greta revealed that if Stote wanted his mother back, he would have to journey into their lair to free her. Stote gave her a platinum for her trouble and let her know she could reach out whenever she might want to leave a G-girl note at Trollskull. Ebon then muddied the waters by both threatening and loving on Greta verbally.
Back with Aquilonia and that group, we find them in the enchantery. A guy in black robes appears deep in his work. We traveled back in time to conclude some business with Quilem where Aquilonia decided she might join the guild, at first as a distraction to try to look at his private research and then as an actual benefit. Since you can’t really role play enchanting a blade, we just meta-gamed to +1 for 300GP.
We ended the evening with a reminder of the impropriety of carrying our weapons openly in the street.
Then Sam had the good sense to ask how far off the festival was.
2021-07-03 I missed a whole conversation
It is Eighth Day, 28th Kythorn The first bell after noon has just sounded.
Started off with a bit of child Slavery and Stote (As Steve) asked how much would be equitable amount to buy out urchins. (Is his real name Stote Silverfrond Epstien?)
After some haggling, we got Greta on board to be a bit of a spy both for and against us. Then she wanted to mate. Ebon sealed the deal with his new look ‘Actual Steel’.
Back with Aquilonia, we perceived…nothing.
As we approached the door, a whole discussion on chivalry ensued with Nadja determining she’s more of the independent sort. As we re4-entered the enchantery (I just couldn’t break it to him that we had done this last week – mostly because this week the description was so much better). It was a typical enchantery – look it up bitch.
We recapped our conversation for last week inclusive of the pricing structure +1 – 300GP, +2 – 3,000GP, +3 – 9,000GP, Flametongue – 3,000GP, prices stack, but prior enchantments do no discount future work.
It was noted that the blade was engraved with the word ‘Widowmaker’ and the metal was black forged.
At some point Aquilonia determined that Nadaj, having unceremoniously entered without waiting for Name to open the door, was now passed out at the door. Aquilonia immediately tried to get her wet. As soon as that happened Billy got excited and decided, it was time to get Sam alone.
Aquilonia was able to get Nadja wet enough that she awoke.
It struck two bells.
Stote and Ebon headed in our general direction enjoying the sites, sounds, and flavors of the busy streets inclusive of Fairy Logs (pretzel treats previously encountered at the theater).
S&E noticed Rialta’s Weapons was closed and empty and so headed on to Aurora’s. They didn’t seem to encounter the correct combination of things and prices.
Back with Aquilonia, Name confirmed his attire was impeccable and Nadja made an odd comment about his vision, and Bill inquired about covering Name spellscar.
As S&E were leaving the shopkeeper of Aurora’s mentioned that they must be some of the ‘unregistered immigrants’ and then whipped out his Wazoo to illustrate. This raised some interest in the wazoo, so we’ll have to make more. After this prices came down, sales went up and a list was made for future purchases. The proprietor, Steven, indicated that Ebon was a bit vain which Stote explained meant a great and powerful warrior.
As we all continued towards our eventual meet-up at the YP, Name found a Wazoo blowing through the streets and now we are literally all on the same page. He was reminded of the paperwork back at the Portal.
The drinking of StonePiss was already underway and Name was not one to shy away so we were well into our cups. After gathering some opinions, Ebon and Nadja engaged in an arm wrestling competition. Stote took bets that Nadja would win and was looking to be sorely disappointed to the tune of 25 Dragons. Rutsy was elated, but he was still bandaged, so Ebon didn’t pound him.
Ebon was confused as to why Stote was mad since he only bet 5 Dragons.
After finding out that they couldn’t get a discount, Nadja paid for everyone, so everyone is going down on Nadja. Stote must have done a great job as Nadja gave him 12 Dragons.
We quickly traversed down to the second level and advanced along to the door outside 7e without incident
Nadja gave Aquilonia one of the Platinum rings and told her to ‘stay close’ (within 60 feet)
Stote opened the door and was going to duck out of the way, but there were three somethings just inside the door. They won initiative especially when Stote was inspired to roll a worse second initiative.
The creatures attacked but their aim was misplaced
Name dumped a bunch of damage on one with his bow but it didn’t go down.
Ebon cut off the approach to Aquilonia and gave one a choppy choppy.
Nadja stepped up and after a slow start was inspired to send the one Name hit back to the grave.
Aquilonia cast firebolt and did almost as much damage to the creature as she did to Ebon’s body hair.
Stote managed to overcome the smell of death, disengaged to a safe-ish distance, and attacked with his bow. During his attack, Stote both killed the one that Ebon choppy choppied and outed Ebon for being engaged with it.
The only remaining creature decided that he still liked girls and attacked Nadja, but he was just unable to make a connection with her.
Name shot a couple holes in him but not enough to kill him.
Ebon, finding the stench not all that unusual, attacked but would have missed except that Nadja granted a War Gods Blessing and converted it to a hit. Not feeling good enough about that, he chopped him again and that was enough to end the encounter in our favor.
Since we didn’t want to find out if this smell could stick to our clothes, we moved south.
We found the remains of a thin-ish humanoid wearing rubber boots and Ebon gave them to Aquilonia.
The next room revealed a note that said, “Day 10. With lightning and copper wires, I created a pack of ghouls. Hal was not impressed. He says I’m not ready for Dweomercore and its arcane secrets. I’ll show him. His flesh golem has given me an idea for a trap more devious than any Hal could devise. Lightning-is there anything it can’t do?”
We moved further south and found a dead end hallway with a vien of copper at the end. Name put together the note, the previous Golem encounter, and the body and determined this must have been the mage that was the source of the floating skull and also the pack of ghouls she created. Ebon however corrected him and pointed out that these are ghasts. Since we didn’t want to become miners, we moved on.
We arrived at areas 13a without incident and were able to hear…something. It was a cacophony of disassociated sounds that came from the rooms in front of us.
Ebon led the way and even though he pointed to the East, Nadja moved to the north. She found an altar to Dumathoin with prayer inscriptions in dwarvish. The altar was covered with greasy handprints. Nadja cleaned those off and as she was doing so, the area brightened and Nadja felt somehow bolstered. As she departed the altar, it seemed as if the light guided her to a particular mining cart that had 4 chucks of mithril in it (worth about 25 Dragons each).
Just as we were deciding, we weren’t going to be able to retire from the new find, one of the creatures charged down the hallway towards Stote and Ebon. We all rolled initiative (Stote rolling poorly again) and decided we should continue next week…
2021-07-10 – No, I’m not tired from Cribbage
It is Eighth Day, 28th Kythorn somewhere after the second bell after noon has just sounded.
We rejoin the combat already underway (ok, really just starting, but technically, underway)
Ebon gets things started with the choppy choppy and another choppy choppy which makes it choppy, choppy, choppy, choppy.
The creature attempted to retort but didn’t do as well as it might have. Not wanting to leave Stote out, one of the creatures’ mouths spit something on him which caused him to go eww (ok, he might have been blinded, but was inspired to get out of the way in time).
Stote then retaliated with his skim-itars but missed. Rather than stay in combat Stote moved a good distance and tried to get the goo off of him.
Name shot it twice from what he hoped was a spit proof distance. He did some good damage setting up the final blow (see below)
Aquilonia cast a firebolt to finish the combat with thatt creature.
Stote busied himself with much godliness (cleaning himself) and Name reminded him to refill his canteen while we were still close.
Ebon began hacking through the creature to see what he could find. While he found not even so much as a butthole (heh, heh) he did observe that the creature seemed to leave behind a slime trail that might be a useful tracking tool for the future.
Proving that the future is now, we back-trailed this one to a section of tunnel rather than hallway and, after Stote asked the regular hallway if we should proceed (an inquiry the hallway rudely ignored), we decided to proceed until we suddenly could hear another one somewhere ahead.
Initiative time:
Name moved forward and decided, since he had the line of sight, he would start the show.
Aquilonia turned up the heat with a fireball that caught all of them napping.
There was some discussion on suprise vs initiative and now we will remember.
Then, having settled that, one of the mouthers attacked the hallway and managed to blind Name although everyone else saved. Name took his next action to try to clean off the slime.
Ebon went ahead and attacked and did some damage.
Some one must have sneezed because Nadja blessed everyone.
Stote debated a bit about how to attack and where to move, then finally decided to do both, and killed one of them.
Aquilonia went with her fire bolt and did some more damage.
One of the remaining mouthers moved forward and spat in the tunnel again. Aquilonia was slimed.
Nami cleared his vision enough to kill the closest one (stupid slimers) and do some damage to the remaining mouther. He did point out that, while upsetting, the slime would be a distant memory as soon as he bought a new outfit.
Ebon moved into the room to clean house and chopped the last one to death.
Ebon moved forward and found a room with some dead mouthers and dead mining equipment. (Name asked how you kill mining equipment)
Some investigation by Nadja revealed that these were killed by large weapon slashing attacks.
Moving forward with Ebon on point, we got to an area where the slime trails seemed to go dry.
Then we talked about my dad’s high energy levels and our low energy levels.
Back on track we eneded up looping back to the room with the skull wall and, upon investigating, determined that the wall was made of hundreds of skulls of either hobgolins or similar and we were not able to detemine what ‘torture killed’ them.
Abbott and Costello moved north with their usual stealth/no stealth approach and this caused Stote to go full ‘no stealth’ which almost allowed Ebon to sneak up on Stote.
But, having been instructed to knock on that door, Ebon did just that. The room contained a brobdingnagian throne and also some fairly recent footprints (somewhat human). A detailed search revealed nothing further.
However, Nadja determined now was a great time to play a prank on Ebon and pulled the old ‘fake electric chair’ bit, which caused Ebon to panic save her.
Name followed the footprints and found that they went across both the hall as well as South.
Stote, being too weak to open the door across the hall, called forth the Ebon to budge it.
Ebon Budge in and found…an empty room
We then headed south to finish up the final two rooms but were stalled for a moment by the locked door. The moment stretched on and Stote was not able to use his thieves’ tools to open it after repeated tries.
Ebon expended multiple tries trying the shoulder keyto no avail as well.
Finally, in an attempt to use brain over brawn, Aquilonia and Name came forward. Aquilonia was able to determine that there was an arcane lock on the door and while she did not have a spell to address it, Nadja did.
Nadja cast dispel magic on the door, removing the arcane lock and then..
Ebon, using oh so much finesse, crashed through what was, most likely, an open door.
Inside the room was a small table where someone may have been playing bondsmen and bankers (a fantasy role-playing game about our time). On the table was a rough map of the current dungeon level created from loose stones from the throne room to the north.
Stote checked a small anteroom and found eight humanoids sleeping (yes, even after all that pounding)…
As we were debating what to do, a disembodied voice started to play Monty Hall and try to make a deal.
Voice guy pointed out it was a large dungeon and asked if we might want to strike up a deal to kill some of the Xanathar.
Introducing himself as Rizzeral, he laid out the the deal as finding, killing and bringing back the heads of …Nadia the unbent is a luskin barbarian that wields a battle axe and leads a group of bugbears and…Shun Shureth – a spider like drow who we have previously met. ABK (already been killed)
While we tried to discuss things with him, Ebon kept trying to find him and Stote kept up verbally jabbing at him until Rizz finally snapped and cast a darkness spell on everyone.
Initiative:
Name moved backwards and south into the hall holding the action to shoot if any enemy came out in the hall.
Aquilonia held her action in null state.
Stote moved south into the were-possum room and found out that they were actually wererats that were playing possum. He moved north and held an attack if anything moved to the South.
Rizz cast a lighting bolt that hit Stote for half damage and Ebon for full.
Wererat 1 came around the corner and took a shot from Stote‘s held action. Since that didn’t kill him, he took a wild shot at Ebon and missed.
Wererat 2 came out and shot Stote for a bit more damage.
Wererate 3 came out and shot at Stote as well, missing him due to cloakiness.
Wererat 4 likewise was a cloak victim
WR5 went for Stote – Cloak miss
WR6 went for Ebon, regular miss
WR7 went for Ebon, regular miss
WR8 managed to hit Ebon (even a wererat finds a nut occasionally)
Ebon went all Donna Summer (enough is enough) and went into a rage and then after Rizz. He locked up in a grapple and started babbling at him (perhaps trying to make Rizz think he was a gibbering mouther) and then locked up on him.
Then a huge bickering match broke out about how much you could say in a single round.
Nadja, who had had plenty of time to plan her next action, dispelled the darkness and then recharged a second level spell.
Name, seeing the darkness down went in and shot one of the wererats to death.
Aquilonia fireballed the wererats and got all of them but killed none of them. A lot of smoldering near-corpses though.
Stote ran up and stabbed the shit out of Rizz, twice.
WR1-Ebon-Hit/WR2-Stote-Hit/WR3-Ebon-Miss/WR4-Stote-Hit/WR5-(Dead)/WR6-Ebon-Miss/WR7-Ebon-Miss/WR8-Ebon-Miss
Ebon continued babbling at Rizzeral that it was his fault and he could stop it. He wanted to be persuasive, Bill leaned more towards intimidation.
Rizzeral seemed to cave in to reason and yelled to his compatriots to “stop this madness”.
As Nadja cast spirit guardian she called out that this was their last chance. As the guardians were about to come into existence…
…we heard a voice say “I think we all need to get along” and everyone felt calmer.
Ebon pushed away Rizz
Nadja decided to hold her spirit guardian,
An unwashed waif in loose rags showed up
….and we’ll see you next week.
2021-08-07 Nothing can kill me
We proceeded to the third level continuing our review of the dungeon and now with the new goal of finding Stote’s mother who we have been told is a captive on an island in skullport. Guided by a poorly draw map we received from Rizzeril.
The level started with a crypt to the left. Niches containing dwarven bodies lined the walls.
Not liking the smell, we headed south and discovered the ruins of a gnomish city.
Not finding much, we proceeded South and got to the area marked on our poor map marked ‘Do not go this way’ so Stote went that way. We were able to determine that what Stote originally thought might have been a dragon was more likely a Chimera so, in the interest of horticulture and treasure, we attacked.
After defeating the Chimera, we took a short rest and got back some HD. Just in time as giant spiders beset us. We made short-ish work of them as they kept coming into the room until they could no longer fit.
Then began the long debate of going back to town or continuing deeper looking for Mrs. Stote. Going back finally won out.
We returned to the portal arriving at some point in the middle of the night. Even though the hour was unusual, we encountered Ezvele Rosznar who, while first inquiring about her brother Cressandor, quickly shifted the conversation to the motivations of the Cassalanters. She produced an infernal contract that read something like the below:
“By Infernal compact, a bargain is forged between the following signatories, bound in blood and fire and binding in all realmş for all time, inviolate and eternal:
Lord Victoro Cassalanter, Banker of prominence in the City of Waterdeep and faithful servant
of the Nine Hells. Beneficiary.
Lady Ammalia Cassalanter, an Arcanist of great skill and prominent figure in Waterdeep,
likewise faithful to the Infernal Powers, Beneficiary.
and
Asmodeus, Dark Prince of the Nine Hells, Dread Tyrant of the Baator Throne, Lord of Lies,
et al.. Grantor.
By the terms of this compact, the Beneficiaries shall gain that as can be proffered by the Infernal Powers, to include long life, exemplary health and freedom from want. Their endeavors shall thrive, whilst rivals are dealt a measure of misſorlune, ruin and penury.
In exchange, they agree to forfeit the souls of any offspring their union has yet brought forth, or to be conceived en futuro. Any such souls shall enjoy nine years of freedom before said souls shall be claimed by the Grantor, becoming Legion Infernum in perpetuity.
En alternis, the Beneficiaries may consign to the Nine Hells one shy of a million gold coins, and the sacrifice of one shy of one hundred unfortunate souls. Er iditem. The Grantor may nullify the compact at will. In so doing, the terms of the contract shall be deemed fulfilled. “
Much conversation ensued with Ezvele and a plan began to develop to do something about that ‘one shy of a million’ gold pieces thing.
We slowly got the whole party involved until all were informed and we were done for the night.
2021-08-07 Sam’s notes The Inglorious Baconeers of Trollskull Manor
After incredible adventures on the first two levels of the Infinite Halls of the Mad Mage in the Undermountain, the Trollskull Baconeers made their way down the stairway to the third level seeking to rescue Eel-win-weh-var (aka “Winnie”Silverfrond), the quite popular elven maiden from her enslavement to the evil Xanathar Guild. Stote Silverfrond, Winnie’s only son of note; of course took the lead scouting ahead in the ways of the shadow for which he is renowned. The pillar of restraint and patience that is Ebonhund Crazymane, held a hand in the air signaling the others to hold until their companion completed his survey of the surrounding corridors.
And if the hallways of the Mad Mage are known for their sheer length and abundance, this run-on sentence will soon rival it, as the charismatic Name’Unk’nown planned his tactics studying theacquired mapof Rizzeril, the Zhenterim wererat gang leader, but was distracted (and unable to put his thoughts into written words) clearly by the grace, fine quality, and financial stability that is the Lady Acquollonia Sandhor AND the rugged sex appeal and impractically endowed Bloodmaiden of Haela Brightaxe, warpriestess Nadja Bruennordottir.
Upon Stote’s return and discussion, it was agreed upon that Stote’s mother was the priority, even though there was some apprehension for continuing at less than full strength, and with an impending fancy party to attend. But, curiosity prevailed and the party chose to head toward the dwarven catacombs of Dumathoin (dwarven deity of mining). Stote continued to scout ahead and found a couple pathways from the tomb and verified our map that he did smell decay and death in one direction, but a more refreshing scent from the other, unfortunately labeled “Drow guards & spiders here”on our map. Ahhh, the scent of the dark elves!
The Baconeers chose to go south until the nicely hewn hallway gave way to the ruins of a former town. Inspection found that this place was too precarious for loud conversation as each discussion saw parts of the ceiling fall upon the party. Who could do such never-lasting construction? Only the Strongkalder Clan are historically known to dwarves to have been so poor at masonry. Nadja thought they were just an old wives’ tale meant to scare dwarven younglings. She could not immediately come to terms with the fact that dwarven stone masonry practices could actually be so bad, and felt compelled to tell fiction to her party about Gnomes, an oft used scapegoat in dwarven history. Soon, Stote found a trail out of the ruins, though I tled to a chamber which both smelled bad and began emitting bestial sounds.
Rizzeril’s map stated not to enter, but the ever-confidant Stote just wanted to do a quick scan of the room. He spotted a three-headed creature, only overshadowed by a horde of coins on the floor. Ebon unflinchingly identified the creature as a Chimera, a part-goat, part-lion, part-dragon monstrosity of legend, which he recalled from his people’s history. Nadja’s people also spoke of it, but these adventurers knew what had to be done. Though it seemed like a daunting task, the choice was clear–they must free the coins from this tyrannical beast!
Name led the charge with a volley of arrows, followed by an upside-down Stote. Acquollonia threw fire at the beast. Nadja gave them the blessings of her war god. Ebon charged into melee, axe first. The Chimera’s goat-face bit Ebon and its dragon-face breathed fire on the rest, but to no avail as in 12 seconds, it was slain! New team record! Thousands of coins littered the floor, but they were no match for ye olde Bag of Holding, the underappreciated sixth member of the party.
A brief rest and the party were revisiting the discussion of returning topside for the evening. A decision realized with the arrival of an entire adventuring party of giant spiders who smelled the freshly roasted goodness of the party. The continuous stream of eight-legged baddies were piling up in the cavern making all involved reconsider their positions. As the remaining spiders headed south, the party headed north to the land of flowing beer casks, shops of fancy dress clothing, and hopefully nine-courses of luxurious party foods beyond the budget of these adventurers. But no.
When the party arrived back at the Yawning Portal, they were not only greeted by fortunate gamblers buying them a drink, but by a familiar face. Nadja was approached by the formerly exiled noble Esvele Rosznar; former roommate aboard the ship Lonesome Trodder and more recently potential client seeking her missing brother Crescendo, who seems to have wandered into the Undermountain. Speaking privately, Esvele expressed her concern over the “Founder’s Day Feast” being put on by Lord and Lady Cassalanter in less than two days. How she gathered the intel seemed to spark familiarity with Nadja, who outed the noble as “the Black Viper,”a burglar of folklore in Waterdeep, and the one who broke into her bedroom at Trollskull Manor. Admitting her guilt, she seemed sincere in her apologies over distrusting the party, but has come to realize the Trollskull Baconeers are more than just pretty faces, but just the kind of foolhardy adventurers this town needs to save it!
Clues the Black Viper acquired during a recent covert visit to the Cassalanter estate led her to find documentation of a contract with Asmodeus, fabled devil leader of the Nine Hells. This document convinced the party that the Cassalanter’s contract was coming to an end soon, and payment was their children’s souls due to the devil, unless an escape clause was met: 99 innocent souls and one million gold pieces. The thought of this devilry disturbed the crew, but again…one million gold pieces! Everyone was onboard.
Now they must figure out how to become real heroes, stop these devil-dealing cultists, save numerous innocent lives, and retire in immense wealth!
Party Time, Cassalanter Style – 5/22/21 – 6/12/21 – 11c
2021-08-21 Totally over Covid
It is 29 Kythorn early in the morning. As the Trollskull Baconeers, bravest adventurers in Waterdeep, awaited the sound of the 6th bell and we picked up where we left off, a shadowy corner of the yawning portal sharing secrets of the Cassalanters (and drinks) with Esvele Rosznar.
After a brief debate about options for canceling the contract (you don’t really want to know) Esvele left. We then debated our actual alignment while we magically arrived at Trollskull.
While everyone else was going to bed, Stote went down for a bit of beer and breakfast.
MMMM, bacon trance.
Stote got to observe that Trollskull had become quite the meeting place. Several small groups were at various places while on hafling seemed to be poking about a little too much. So, Stote poke back as soon as his fork was free. A brief conversation ensued but it was fairly hostile (maybe Steve should think about Diplomacy checks) and even engaged a nearby hostile customer. After almost no time at all, the hafling fled.
Stote had a more amicale conversation with the formerly grumpy customer and they came to the agreement that he was odd.
Stote took a trans back to his room for 4 hours. (Oh sorry, trance)
Long Res. Folks were healed, spells were changed, and all was right with the world.
Name bathed and changed and we found that the only cleaner and clothier were in bum-fuck (at least on the interactive map).
Ebon wondered why we needed clothes as we were going to go in as the poor so we could smuggle in our weapons (cuz he’s been watching too much Robin Hood) but Name, sitting on Nadja‘s lap, reminded him of the BOH.
Then a debate ensued and we had to figure out poor or rockstar, did we get an invitation or just a flier, how did banquets work, and what happened to Stotes Trans.
We sent stuff off to the Aquilonia’s home for cleaning with the butler Reginald. Felimid, the dragonborn majordomo was not there, sorry Ebon.
While everyone else decided to ‘home clean’ Aquilonia and Name raced to the market (literally, Aquilonia won) to buy more gear. Not finding the perfect dress attire, Name quickly found his adventuring gear and then went back to an eldery woman (Tessamin) who had fine wear if not in the latest style. He ended up purchasing a nice leather outfit with buckskin hatching and studs.
Aquilonia was able to find something lacey and form fitting and added that to two others she liked and then looked for something for Nadja but most of the women’s garb was too frilly.Unfortunately, Name’s idea of frill y male dwarven garb didn’t pan out.
Aquilonia was able to find an awesome chain dress at another stand for just 5G.
Then is was back to TS to meet with Ezvele
Meanwhile, Nadja was bathing and Stote avoiding windows. After regrouping down in the tavern area for a bit, a slight male figure appears that turned out to be Esvele trying to get her hands on some Irish Spring (dressed like a man).
Everyone went upstairs and Aquilonia and Name joined shortly thereafter.
Ezvele changed back into something more comfortable and then whipped it out – her drawings and notes on the Casselanter property.
NOTE: She had tried to get in to the attic but had heard a ruckus and then advised, “Perhaps someone is being held hostage there?”…Hmm
The discussion turned to subterfuge and lack of plans but we did come up with these options:
- 437-A) Slip away during the banquet
- 437-B) Anonymous tip to the guards to cause a distraction
- 437-B Redelivered) Nadja has a spell that could alert someone (Greta?) to notify the guard.
- 437-C) A daytime tour of the property under the guise of confirming attire and invitation to reconnoiter
- 437-Noname?) A nighttime adventure to reconnoiter a bit more aggressively.
Breaktime – Bill’s new idea is to generate waif characters – Lesby waifs.
Planning complete: 29th 437-No Name; 30th Florist, 437-C, Clothiers, Broadsword from Enchanter, Aquilonia to Library, anything else; 1st Whateva, then the combo of 437-B and 437-B Redelivered.
After some discussion about Name’s clothes which led to the mention of closet expansions and, after coming out of the closet, Name said that he had plans for the manor and the million at which point Ezvele recalled a story about the Cass’ looking for an artifact called the Stone of Golar.
Upon that mention, Name remembered some things Ronnie (aw, Ronnie) had said about this. The stone lies at the heart of at least some of the tension between the Zhentarim and the Xanathar.
With our plans relatively laid (aw, Ronnie) we headed out for the 437-Noname stopping at Gounar’s to obscure our travels. We had expensive ale and charcuterie. Having established our alibi we headed towards the Cassalanters…we stopped.
However, Sam reminded Bill of experience and we made it to the next level…NOT! We are still Salt Lake City away.
2021-08-28 Now here’s a robbery…maybe
It is 9 and 1/2 Bells on the evening of 29 Kythorn and we have made our circuitous way to the Cassalanters (described with quite the circuitous conversation).
As we thought we were about to arrive, close enough indeed to have noticed someone smoking on the second floor balcony, we decided we might want to revisit some preparations. We determined what was in the BOH. Additional spells were prepared and we were ready-ish.
Stote and Esvele went in together with a bit of help from Ebon and Name (who flirted harmlessly? with Esvele).
Esvele and Stote move quietly across the property using the foliage for coverage. Stote used the excuse of tripping over a root to play some grab-ass with Esvele. Esvele might have been turned on as she quickly pulled Stote behind a tree and looked around to make sure they were alone.
The smoker may have noticed as they moved off the balcony.
This didn’t seem to phase Esvele as she pulled Stote closer and said something about breaking wind, moving like the wind…something). Suddenly Stote felt breezier.
The grounds began to reveal themselves showing the pre-banquet preparations and some fragrant floral areas as well.
Continuing into these areas, they paused behind a fountain for cover and surveyed the area. The balcony, visible as they approached, was definitely empty.
Returning to the party, we found the planned way blocked by the city guard and so we chose the ‘long way’ to wrap back around to the front of the manor.
Back with the scouts, Stote proved he actually ‘could’ be stealthy. But Esvele countered by proving she might need two tries to pick locks. Once inside it got very interesting (but only to Bill). As they moved inside, the exterior light illuminated the lavish furnishings of the room. A notable feature was an empty wine glass on a book. Stote stole the book. Random chance searching…hurray.
Esvele, listening at one of the doors, motioned to Stote that children were in the next room. Stote decidded this as a good time to blow in Esvele’s ear. He whispered the things women like to hear like “are we murdering children?”
The main group had made the turn, a carriage approached at a good speed, from the south. Nadja and Aquilonia realized it was marked as a noble house but it was driven and manned with city guards. We debated purpose and point for a bit and decided to carry forward with our travels at an increased pace.
Meanwhile, the child murders were sorting things out, it seemed like the children might be able to hear them. Stote’s fear was assuaged when they heard a nanny or grandma (Nana) speaking to the children telling them it was time for bed. Stote apparently threw open the door while singing opera (he rolled as poorly as the root role earlier) and cringed that someone might overhear. He tried to cover this by informing ESV that something was swollen. ESV wasn’t buying it.
Entering the room, they found a fantastic library room with a collection of books on floor to ceiling shelves. One wall contained wide mouthed bottles filled with swirling mists.
Before they could close the door, a black bird flew out of the room. They exited through the same door and found themselves in a music room/hallway with a harpsichord and chalices with a grumpy sun on them, which is a nobility’s symbol of the right to rule. God…looking north, Stote saw guards in the green livery of the Cassalnters watching the hall. One was overhearing a conversation that he could make out as saying, “yes, there were two of them. I saw them with my own eyes”.
Aquilonia’s party, having reached the next contact point, used Sending to check in. Stote‘s answer made it seem like the jig was up and so we went into drunk distraction mode and headed towards the guards with Aquilonia and Nadja following behind.
Ebon and Name ignored the signs and gate, and headed straight for the guard. The antics continued as we discussed with the guard the valueof our invitation. (I’ll add some detail later)
ESV and Stote in the meantime begin their flight to the Southwest. As soon as they cleared the manor, ESV went full speed and whipped out her claws, meow (Cat’s Claw grapple) and fired it from a hand crossbow and perfectly caught a branch. Immediately, she stepped through a stirrup in the crossbow and expertly alighted atop the wall. Stote, being a tremendous copycat, showed that he had flair as well as dexterity.
Aquilonia’s group in the meanwhile continued their misdirection until a tiefling matron opened the gate and chastised Ebon for his volume and the hour, so Name headed south and the group moved away with some apologies.
Nadja provided us all ale and we headed off down the rough road sending to SnE to meet back at Trollskull.
We were all together again just after 12 bells on 30 Kythorn.
After we all shared our various adventure tales, and Esvele recalled that she had seem many ravens similar to the one she and Stote encountered,
ESV asked what was in the book Stote had purloined and Stote threw it to Aquilonia to review. Turned out to be a journal that belonged to Victoro Cassalanter.
While much of this text was mundane, some areas stood out. One such comment was “NeverEmber’s Dragons are an answer to our prayers”. Nadja noted that ‘Dragons’ might refer to the coins. Ebon added that Neverember was the lord of Neverwinter. Somehow, someone connected the Stone of Golar to Neverember. Name added to his further recall that the Stone of Golar was a key to a great treasure.
Aquilonia, still reading form the journal, suddenly asked, “What is an aboleth?” Nadja recalled that it is a fishlike creature of immense size/ Aquilonia continued, “Now it all makes sense, Golorr is an Aboleth”.
After some discussion, we theorized much but it might be that the gold is already at the Cassalanters. We decided that the only modification that may be required is to pick up some toys for the kids.
As they headed to bed, Name mentioned to Stote that his mother would be saved. Esvele, overhearing, asked for more information at which point Stote spilled his guts the whole sordid story. Esvlele seemed incredulous that Stote’s mother might be aiding ‘the Xanathar’ willingly. She felt that a traditional eleven power might not be held by such a creature.
As she was starting to depart, Esvele reached down and whipped it out…A pouch full of keys. She picked one key out and returned it to Aquilonia with an apology for having it in her possession.
The situation passed without much further interaction, as did Stote‘s invitation for a little ‘not sleep’.
The party, and the group, both retired.
2021-09-04 Some call him…Jim!
30 Kythorn – 8 Bells (Everyone else started at 7 bells, but Name likes his beauty sleep.
Ebon awoke, as he often does, with the sunrise. (Cuz it’s hard to sleep on the roof with the sunlight everywhere. On the way down he knocked to check on Nadja who’s hunger wakes her early as well.
Stote, only needing 4 hours of trance instead of eight hours of sleep, may have spent as much as 3 hours downstairs with a bib around his neck, waiting for bacon.
The gang assembled at what will, most likely become our ‘regular’, ‘reserved’ table and the baconeering began.
Item of note: No hangover!!!
Folks began filtering in, including Tally (one of the Carpenters) but no sign of a Norm or a Cliff. The halflings seemed to be the closest we’ll get.
With the place beginning to fill, Ebon complained about the service and Aquilonia told him to shut the fuck up (or something similar). Name came down looking fresh, well rested, and wondering whether or not his cleaning had arrived. Aquilonia said it may be outside. It was not and so it shall be a sad day in Waterdeep for Name.
As we broke our fast, we could hear the wagons and other businesses coming to life outside. We discussed the plans of the day with toys and flowers and new clothes for Stote. Ebon pondered what turqoise.
We overheard some conversation about the feast and learned that Falla would be going in a ‘Traditional Elven Garb’ (still androgenous).
Joining the conversation from afar, Ebon learned that there would be archery competitions and Ebon asked if there would be Axe competitions and Barnaby, not the guard, not Barnabus Balstwind, but the other Barnaby the hafling advised that there might. **
Apus Honeymaker, the local honey and mead vendor, entered and joined the table that was getting crowded with halflings, one a female with a sword.
As of nine bells, we were getting ready to go when ESV entered. After gallantly showing her to his seat, Name, as well as the rest of the group, noted she was looking a bit haggard and carrying a large book. She ‘splained that she had an association with a gentleman who new augury, or divination, or sumpthin like that and she teared up a bit as she wondered if he might live.
Aquilonia took the book, Name offered a hanky, Ebon was both discussed and still eating, and we offered ESV some, you guessed it, bacon.
ESV mentioned a new concern about our plan to warn the city watch as they might be involved more deeply than was thought. Ebon thought deeply about the bacome and retrieved the platter he offered earlier.
As ESV leaned in conspiratorially, Aquilonia suggested that we adjourn to the upstairs.
As we were about to leave, a halfling sidled up, dressed as the city guard and let us know he was eavesdropping on our loud conversation. He introduced himself as Darvin Grandfoot, an actual member of the city guard and he advised that the guards we saw last night were Cassalanter personal guard dressed as city guards.
We went upstairs to discuss further, Davrin noticed we had chess. Nadja thought he said chests and warmed to him immediately. She did inquire as to whether he was a drummer or not.
After some breakfast and light conversation, we determined that Davrin was aware of our activities because he was ‘interested’. He advised that he felt our activities might be a good way to supplement his income with some off hours adventuring.
Name hinted at coming events and advised that he should come back that evening. As he was about to depart, Ebon stopped him to ask a bit more about what he might know about us. Davrin indicated that a group such as ours, with someone as powerful as Ebon, often presents someone such as Davrin opportunities.
Ebon, being fully buttered, was ready to blow Davrin. (Or at least leave the room).
Just as it seemed Jim would get no additional play time, ESV, inching closer to Aquilonia, asked further how Davrin seemed to pick ‘now’ as a good time to observe us and advance his opportunity.
Davrin opened up a bit more about his observations of our reconnoiter yesterday. Aquilonia said he could join us in the dungeon three days hence and Name found we might find him this evening in the Sea Ward between 4 and 6 bells at the West Gate.
10 Bells – Time for shopping – Toys for the kids (Aquilonia knows a good store), Flowers x 2, Sword for Name, Clothes for Stote.
Aquilonia and Ebon will go to the toy store with the group and Nadja and Name will continue south and get a sword, and clothes. Flowers will be as late as possible.
What the fuck did I miss?!? I came back from peeing and someone was being slammed into the ground. I will forever wonder what kinds of toys they sell. Ebon made a dex check to catch someone who was being tossed off. Well, at least Ebon didn’t kill him. [There was a very valuable doll in the toy story that Aquilonia wanted, but when she inquired about the price, the stated 100G shocked Aquilonia so much, Ebon threatened him. At which point the shopkeeper tried to call the city guard, but Aquilonia moved the earth (literally) to stop him. After the shopkeeper recovered, Aquilonia offered to help and the victim of unknown origin seemed dazed and confused. He observed the buckled ground and Aquilonia suggested it may have been an earthquake. Ebon reminded him that he was interested in the little lady doll for ‘millady’. No longer shook up, the shopkeep knew a sucker when he saw one and regaled Ebon with the virtues of the little girl’s toy.
The shopkeeper extracted the very delicate feminine article from it’s case and Aquilonia, counseled not to touch, observed as closely as possible every facet of the doll. This included the seemingly magical opening eyes. At 100 GP, it was quite the bargain (not). Aquilonia‘s interest was piqued by the preparation the shopkeeper was using to keep it perfectly pristine. Aquilonia countered the asking price with an offer of 25 GP and a wondrous argument ensued.
The shopkeeper was distracted by some urchin playing with a city guard doll (much more manly than the one our group was considering) and he immediately began to scold and chide the waif until he fled. Ebon retrieved the GI City Guard doll with kung fu grip and gave it a couple test swings. It dawned on him that this would be an excellent toy for a young human boy. Wally Watchman was a bargain at 2 SP and when Aquilonia asked, he also produced a…
Name and Nadja made their way quickly to the enchanter, (Ferdinand), who was near where his sword was hung prominently indicating its status of complete and claimed. We exchanged pleasantries and both Nadja and Name left with the latter satisfied and the former a bit disappointed that, rather than finding enchanted drumsticks, she only found a little liar.
As they were departing, cries for help issued from a nearby alley. Following the sounds around, they turned into a smaller alley, obscured by rubble, from which the altercation seemed to arise. As Name forged through the rubble, he was unsuccessfully attacked from above by an unknown assailant. A really uncoordinated combat ensued for both Name and the assailant but fight on, they did. Exchanging half-assed attacks until, on the second round a woman’s voice behind Name mockingly repeated the cries assuring both Nadja and Name that this was some sort of trap. As the ringing from Nadja‘s Toll the Dead faded, we moved over to Stote….
Reconnoitering the area around the Cassalanter area, Stote saw a significant presence of ‘city guards’ around the carriage house, encountered some prying eyes. He was a bit bold in his encounters with the guards, he located a few choice hiding spots among some carts near the wall. Since these had maintenance and building supplies, they may indeed be there when needed. After he was confident, he knew the area he headed back to TrollSkull
Davrin kept an eye on the ‘big guy who seemed to like him’ and noted from a slight distance the events of the toy store above.
Speaking of the toy store, the shopkeeper had gotten the straps off the My Little Princess, and Aquilonia was impressed with not only the quality, but also the resemblance to Lady Cassalanter. She purchased both Wally Watchman and Joe Mulloy for the bargin price of 5 Silver. And then… we stopped –
2021-09-11 Some call him…Jim– part 2, even Jimmier.
30 Kythorn, 11ish Bells. Split party shopping…
We start with Name and Nadja (and the hokey pokey). Nadja started off by spraying him with mace. She liked it so much that she used a war priestess ability to attack again and maced him further. She reminded them that it is impolite to pretend to be in combat. Name hit twice and found out that the ass-ass-in may not have been as injured as we thought.
At this point the unk-nown ass-ailent, crept up behind Name and, not being satisfied to just brandish a short sword, she also attacked with it. After figuring out that we had long lingering defensive effect still on us and then taking it off, the unk-nown assailant ended up batting 500 but without any sneak attack damage, did Name really even feel it? It was then time for the ass-ass-in to try again and this time around, Name did indeed feel it.
Stote was playing Opie and whistling while heading home.
Darvin continued to observe Aquilonia and Ebon who moved on from sex toy shopping to finding some accesories that Nadja would ‘like’. Not knowing what Ebon wanted to buy, and getting no response to text messaging, they decided to catch a dray to the accessory store. Ebon did not srip naked and sing, “I’m a little teapot”, as he rolled the other option.
Nadja used her first attack to finish off the ass-ass-in and then axe vaulted over Name to start taking out the dirty blond woman behind Name. She got the ball rolling by bleeding her a bit and then…Name then critically missed, then was inspired to hit, hit again, and killded the biatch.
It was then time to lot the bodies. As we were doing so, Nadja found a contract. At that moment, the city guard came around and found us pilfering corpses. It was time for some slick Willy and Nadja and Name laid it on to just the right thickness. Hopefully, the guards will spread the word that Rex the Hammer is dead (right after they get done checking the coin into evidence).
Davrin continued to follow Aquilonia and Ebon. Even though they caught adray, his ability to move through the city streets allowed him to match their pace. As he was following, he saw Name and Nadja come out of the alley, Name looking a bit less fresh than expected. He tried to get either Aquilonia’s or Ebon’s attention to look back to see Name and Nadja. It Worked! Now it’s time for WWED –
Ebon decided to alert Aquilonia (and everyone else) to their presence. When the city watch challenged him and asked him to calm down, it went the other way. WWED However, the CW wasn’t very impressed with the outburst and…
Davrin broke cover and addressed Gus, the CW directly. After sorting things out, Davrin convinced Gus to get the dray to stop and let Ebon and Aquilonia off. As they debarked, a final WWED, it was determined he opted for the ‘perfectly placed pat on the shoulder’ of Gus.
Nadja had used the distraction to cast Cure Wounds on Name and then we broke into introductions of Jim and Sam (master of miniatures).
Since Bill couldn’t find us a carriage that could hold five, we bid adieu to Davrin, promising to meet him as planned and headed south (completely unaware of him following us). And we were off to Piatran’s Clothiers.
Dimiter greeted us warmly and then he saw Ebon. He quickly recovered his demeanor however as Name read through the litany of outfits he would need. Something new to replace his damaged attire (streetwise but with a bit more flair), something for the Cassalanters, something to match for Ronnie Riautar, the turquoise outfit for Stote, and some accessories. Name also dropped a challenge to Piatran to design something ‘adventurey’ (with some little flair, for Ebon).
Nadja‘s outfits were only slightly more subdued but looked good nonetheless. The first dress appeared to be flowing metal cascading over her. The second was Nadja‘s ‘street garb with flair’.
Aquilonia selected the yellow dress for herself but Name slipped the other two in as well.
Ebon probably wouldn’t have gone for anything, but Name insisted that he also get a new tuxedo suit. A bit lighter and in a bit better color. Also a selection of cumberbuns and pocket squares.
Moving on to Melgards fine leathers, we found lots of s-porn but no one in sight. Nadja got to work immediately, trying things on to find her favorites.Name called out for some help and a tall dwarf who was small in stature? Began to offer us some help. Nadja asked for both something to match her current outfit as well as something for the party tomorrow. There was a bunch of foot porn and fittings and small talk where Nadja seemed to be deciding that a cobbler is as good as a drummer.
Nadja shared some of her history and, as the conversation progressed; Melgard seemed to start paying attention to her as a person rather than just a customer. It turns out that Melgard was part of the Melarkin clan and they’re from the North and are partially responsible for some of the original construction of undermountain. Nadja and he began to discuss this in earnest, specifically an entrance to the undermountain by the harbor. It worked out that Nadja would use her dripping sexuality to get the information on a date, two days hence. Name dropped the hint that perhaps Melgard might attend the Cassalanters ball tomorrow. More conversation and…It’s a date!
Aquilonia meanwhile was working with a tiny creature [Savy the Gnome] (that may or may not have been looking up her dress) to find pouches, purses or the like that she liked. She found these and some pouch bandoliers that the micro-perv helped her put on. She was about ready to buy when Name bought 2 bandoliers for each person in the whole party.
Name got shoes for each of his and each of Ronni’s outfits as well as a pair of boots for himself.
We noticed that 5 bells had rung and turned our thoughts to the ongoing ruse and so planned to head out to get Ebon’s bracers and pick up Davrin and get information from the Cassalanters … but that will be next week.
2021-09-18 Hangin’ with Robin Sherbatsky
30 Kythorn 5 Bells – And we are still shopping. Now it’s off Essimuth’s Equipment for the Ebon’s Bracers. Name freshened up a bit, took his clothes to Amrani’s Laundry to be mended, cleaned, and delivered back to the manor.
Stote was back at the manor, rubbing himself down with bacon and thinking of calling 1-900-DRO-WFUN.
Before be-fouling himself with fatback, Stote had questioned the urchins and beggars in the area of the manor and learned that there were many carriages that had been traveling back and forth between the manor and the carriage house. They appeared laden when leaving the manor and lighter when returning.
A prostitute Stote didn’t sleep with, advised that the Cassalanters had been fighting of late. Victoro was observed going out in the evenings and Ammalia has been smoking more on the balconies.
Bill got a phone call from inside the house and left us for a moment while we figured out that this originally came from “When a Stranger Calls” and later reprised in “Scream”.
Stote ponied up some coin for some (no, not that) additional information based on where Victoro might be going she said she didn’t know but indicated that they might find out from Willifort Crowelle, Victoro’s aide; a dapper man with thin rimmed spectacles.
The equipment store was laden with curiosities of all sorts, climbing gear for the city, and ‘tricky’ bags where you might hide your coin. A large man, but not so large as Ebon, greeted them. Ebon explained poorly that he was looking for bracers. As the confusion didn’t clear up, Aquilonia said one word…Bracers.
Turns out that our large (and somewhat paranoid) host was Essimuth himself. After cautioning us not to steal anything, he went back to find some bracers for Ebon, pausing only to note that he’s a totem warrior. After some poking about, he returned with bracers that, when donned, awoke something within Ebon and caused him to sprout coarse hair and some little horns. Essimuth advised that these effects would end when the bracers were removed. Some discussion later, we determined they were Bracers of the Beast.
While the bracers were a bit pricey, for now, we kept them in the back of our mind (maybe not as far back in our minds as the bracers had been in the store) to return at a later date.
So, it ended up being tricky bags all around with some silk ropes for the characters whose names start with N.
Since Aquilonia thinks the ‘day of’ is more acceptable than the day before, we headed off to Diloontier’s Apothecary to reorder healing potions. We found that it was now called Diloontier’s and Son Apothecary. Turns out that his son had decided not to work for the tower of the order and return to the family business. After some haggling, we bought 20 healing potions for 1000GP (200GP) and then headed back to the manor.
Sleep, breakfast, Esvele came back for bacon and Stote and tried to pin flowers to his chest.
Much discussion ensued about our plans. And then Steve came up with the idea to level up.
We will possibly:
1) Look for the poison to replace it with something else
2) Look for the gold to replace 25k of it with nothing
3) Something else
2021-09-25 P-A-R-T-Why, because we gotta!
It is 1 Flamerule, drawing into the evening. Having decided not to go to the Cassalanter’s at night, we enjoy our breakfast while listening to the sounds of the city, which seem more bustley than usual.
Stote came up with the idea to go down in the cellar and show us something. He wanted to show us his new gloomstalker ability. He also talked about his new ‘disguise’ spell’.
That took a lot longer than we thought as suddenly Bugger yelled down that there was a dwarf waiting for Nadja. After a bit of discussion on making men wait, Aquilonia convinced Stote to let Ebon and Name use the Cloak of Displacement as a curtain to shield Nadja from the prying eyes of Melgaard the perv who, while Bill said was dressed to the nines, but is seemed more like the 8 and 3/4s cuz he was definitely getting his perv on with an oversized (we think) codpiece and assless black leather chaps. Melgaard caught a couple glimpses of Nadja, which was more than enough to keep him excited. He ‘splained, as Aquilonia shooed him off to wait, that he was our Uber whenever we were ready and then he went out to wait in the car.
There was some confusion about who would wear what, but we sorted it out and loaded up the bag of holding.
As we looked outside, we saw many people going about festively, many in masks of Lauroun, one of the founders of Waterdeep.
At last, we were all ready to go, exited Trollskull, and beheld the ‘PussyWagon’. Melgaard’s carriage, complete with pervy driver and lots of balls (oops. bells). There was a bit of exchanging of semi-pleasantries as Melgaard tried to get his new treasure to sit alone with him in a front compartment.
Well, Melgaard almost won round 1 as he ended up with Nadja alone, but it wasn’t a loss for the party as he also got in with some intimidation from Ebon.
As we rode on, Ebon inquired as to the plans we didn’t discuss at breakfast, we decided to go with loosely what had been planned and Ebon’s ears.
Meanwhile, in the front compartment, there was banging and lick-her and all sorts of good hosting going on.
As we arrived, Nadja reassembled herself and we all went towards the C-Manor. The poorer people in front of us were directed Beyoncé and we assumed that is where the deaths were going to happen.
As they arrived at the door, Melgaard was greeted by name and ushered to the Zoolander. Nadja got all excited (again) and pinched one of Melgaard’s cheeks. Which one, up to you to decide.
Ebon and Stote followed next and were ushered Zoolander with little ceremony.
Some smelly yellow family cut in between Aquilonia, Name, Esvele, and were promptly ushered to the Beyoncé.
Ebon and Stote were walkin’ the fine line between propriety and not so much and then Aquilonia’s group followed and, when sent to the Zoolander, placed their gifts, as instructed, on the harpsichord.
Ebon took a closer look at Willifort, almost too close, but not quite.
Willifort moved over to thank Aquilonia and Name for the gifts and then recognized Esvele and greeted her as well.
As we entered and Nadja looked at the reeking finery, Melgaard noticed, and a more flirtatious conversation quickly turned to shop talk about how MG grew his business.
Before the boredom overtook us, Stote slipped into the banquet room and paused. When nothing happened, he used disguise self to appear as a Cassalanter guard. Stote’s shenanigans seemed to be working as he caught the first unsuspecting guard on a ‘smoke’ break. The second guard was not as easily fooled, but as soon as Stote assured him that he “Willem Defoe-nee” would do better, the second guard’s suspicions were assuaged.
Heading upstairs, the rest of the group continued to be impressed with the decor including the large mannequin thing near the center of the floor which was embossed with that ‘right to rule’ symbol. Heading upstairs, the rest of the group continued to be impressed with the decor including the large mannequin thing near the center of the floor which was embossed with that ‘right to rule’ symbol. Turns out the mannequin knows how to cut a little rug and guests are engaging with it to do just that.
We milled about the second floor with Nadja peeking out to see the poor already starting to dine. A headcount wasn’t possible, as she couldn’t see around the butterfly garden. She did note that there was one regal woman out near the butterfly garden with two children.
Stote caught the attention of a guard and tried to convince him that guard-Stote was needed up stairs. When that fell apart, he convinced the guard that someone was in the other room. When the guard went to investigate, Stote turned into dwarf-Stote and headed upstairs to connect with Esvella.
Ebon was investigating the upstairs dining room and saw the preparations for the feast. Dishes and linens etc. Digging further, he found a kitchen where many pies were being made by 4 chefs and their crew. Ebon caught a woman’s attention and, when asking if he could try the pies, she offered him a hair, I mean hand pie (Apple). Ebon wolfed it down barely noticing the sugar glaze but appreciating it all the same.
Continuing his investigations, he found the apple cutters room (it’s where the pies came from).
When Ebon returned to the main area on the second floor, Name asked why he might look so happy. He said “Pie”. Name then went to find out if anyone had come up with any plans.
Nadja and Melgaard, and Stote and Esvella all decided they would head upstairs, for distinctly different reasons.
Ebon checked out the spare space where they had set up a piano and guests had started to gather.
As Melgaard slinked up the stairs, Nadja let Ebon know she was joining MG to ‘scout around’.
Stote and Esvella followed suit to actually scout around.
Nadja was the first to the third floor and, upon opening a door, found herself in a room full of toys where a mobile of butterflies spun lazily. In one corner, looking up from her crochet was a tiefling female that looked young and hot, but sounded old and used up. Nadja used the old ‘looking for the can’ line. The Young/Old Tiefling directed her, then Melgaard, downstairs. As they approached the stairs, Esvella and Stote got intercepted as well. Just as it seemed that everyone would get the boot, Nadja cast a silence spell, centering it on the ceiling. And then…
We all rolled initiative.
2021-10-02 Sorry I ruined your black magic party
1 Flamerule 16? Bells, we are just getting ready to prove the old adage that poor planning produces poor results.
Having successfully split the party, Nadja, Stote, and Esvele are upstairs with a pervert and a tiefling. Aquilonia, Name, and Ebon (yeah, the heavy hitters) are downstairs hanging about.
We are in initiative:
Name, unaware of goings on upstairs, wants to check out the pie room. The upstairs dining room is becoming banquetier by the moment. There is a young woman Name recognizes as no one Name recognizes. However, one young thang noticed the inescapable Name vibe and threw him a nod. Name returned the gesture with a bit more ‘stank’ on it.
Stote, upstairs and cutoff from Ebon the killer. He was a bit surprised by the silence but Nadja gave him a nod that seemed to say “something” but he was not sure what. The Tiefling was looking about in confusion. Stote shot her a look to leave, as the events may not be to her liking.
Ebon, downstairs still dreaming about pie, he started to drift back towards the dining room as well. Name was visible, as was the table not quite piled with food. While he was kind of wondering about where Stote had gone, the danger of the food disappearing was of greater concern. He observed the table while successfully saving against rudeness.
The tiefling, getting the gist of Stote‘s detailed glance …wait a minute – premature interaction!
Nadja starts with a quick peck on the cheek to Melgard and then a quick slam attack on the Tiefling. (Guess now she knows Stote‘s look was accurate) Melgard is not sure whether this is a dyke thing or not, so he may not use his action to get excited. She did a little damage but could not maintain her grasp.
Aquilonia was able to observe couples still dancing with the mannequin and, not being that voyeuristic, moved off to join the real combat corps in the dining room. As she entered, a servant motioned for Name to allow him to continue serving and announced that everyone could meet. Name used his reaction to accomplish three goals:
1) Get out of the waiter’s way
2) Get out of Ebon’s way
3) Get a little closer to Miss Nodsalot
Sam took some notes here:
I came back to the Tiefling responding to actions but pulling the infamous thigh dagger and taking a stab at Nadja.
Esvele leapt (literally) into the fray and tried to knock the TF out with the hilt of her dagger. She did not stick the landing and so her first attack went wide. The second one struck home but was not enough.
Name introduced himself using his new real name (Cordian, Samael) and the woman indicated that she might have known someone who looked like him, but went by the name Name. Name advised her of the duality and she seemed impressed that he was the ‘leader’ of the Trollskull Baconeers. Name advised it was more of a democracy, but thanked her none-the-less. She introduced herself as Limeria Laurel-Star.
Back upstairs, Stote punched the TF biach in the face with the hilt of his dagger but one hit was not enough to get her to fall.
Ebon was, much to his chagrin, was summoned away from the table by Aquilonia who wanted to dance. Off they went to the ballroom area.
Bouncing back upstairs, Nadja paused for a moment to check out the TF. Deciding she hadn’t been beat down enough, Nadja tried to give her a grapple and put the huggin on the TF.
Aquilonia spent the round whirling round with Ebon. She noticed that…At some point a guard had come up looking for another guard and now he was joined by still another guard and they both looked pretty odd and beardy….While Aquilonia did pick up on this, she was able to continue leading Ebon around the dance and he, for his part, was able to follow (and that somewhat well) not just her steps but also her guidance about what was going on.
The guards, apparently hating all the subtlety, interrupted the dance to ask Aquilonia and Ebon directly. The rest of the guards continued to mill about with purpose.
The TF, being less lesbian that one might have hoped, broke free and attempted to fling herself from the balcony. Everyone decided this would be a great chance to take a final poke.
Nadja tagged her one and did a bit of damage and then Stote whiffed one at herbut Nadja fixed it with a bit of divine intervention. This was enough to knock her out as she fell. The TF fell with some grace, but less decorum and landed on the floor below with her gown askew. The Black Viper quickly collected the TF and brought her back up the stairs.
MG was looking somewhat confused and Stote signaled Nadja that the time had come for him to take a bit of a nap.
Chatting things up with Limeria and her posse, Name joined in the banqueting.
Stote thought he might use the pommel of a dagger to knock out MG, but his first attempt missed the broad side of a barn. His second was more successful and MG is sleeping as well. Stote dragged his unconscious form into the nursery where all of this began.
Ebon led Aquilonia to the bottom of the stairs and continued to eye the guards. He asked Aquilonia if that might have to do with us.
Nadja did something but my dad was yakkin’ so I missed it.
Aquilonia had failed to notice that Stote was the guard that was now being sought, but Ebon filled her in.
The guards continued to bother everyone, particularly the chef near Name and then moved on. One of them again bothered Ebon and Aquilonia, trying to get upstairs. Ebon attempted to stall and, based on the conversation, succeeded. But no, a persuasion check was required. Ebon did ok, but the jig may be up.
Nadja realized that her burden was possibly bleeding out, but it was not her turn to do anything.
As the third floor party moved into the nursery, Esvele followed, attentive to what the door had to say.
Name took the opportunity to try to get any information from the cook, but to no avail. However, as he rejoined Lamaria, she assured him he was among ‘friends’.
Stote used his next to last spell slot to change into the TF babysitter. Bill counseled him to the physical inspection component of his disguise self spell.
Ebon, noticing the guard had apparently lost patience, and having another guard appear, held out for the 5.5 seconds allowed before he moved on.
Nadja checked out the room for a good hiding spot for a body and eyed a trunk but decided to tie up MG and hide him behind toys.
Aquilonia continued to follow Ebon’s lead as they danced off into the center of the ballroom.
Stote was able to see a guard retrieve the dagger when then looked at him in his new TF form. The guard called Stote over by the name (Liba) and Stote got a little snotty about the children being awoken, but the guard reminded Stote/TF that the children were downstairs.
Esvella informed the informed Nadja that this was the childrens room and they were not, as the guard pointed out, in attendance.
Name continued his conversation with Lamaria and found that Mirt had assigned her to ‘keep an eye’ on Name. Upon hearing this Name, revealed what he knew. Limeria reacted by changing into Bonnie (the barmaid from the YP) Name continued to advise her, and the rest of the group of the infernal contract and the million gold and the 99 dead.
Stote, still subterfuging, amazed at the tenacity and efficiency of the guards, moved down towards the second floor allowing another guard to pass and signaling Ebon to get upstairs.
Ebon, not picking up on things, didn’t connect that Stote was the TF signaling from the stairs. Instead, he moved up the stairs behind the guards.
Nadja, finished hiding her boyfriend in some kinky ‘furries’ scenario, looked to take care of the TF. Determining that, if she laid her on something soft, she might ‘self recover’ in a couple hours if left to her own devices. Nadja still felt the need to indulge her bondage fetish and tied TF up with the curtain stays from the bed (causing the curtains to obscure what may lie on the bed.
As the guard passed Stote on the stairs, Stote felt the need to reach out and try to cause trouble with the guards. He managed to get the guards attention enough to get the guard to sniff at him. When the guard did so, Stote got the feeling he might not be human. He figured this out, just as the guard yelled “Imposter”. But hey, at least he yelled it loud enough for everyone to hear.
Ebon announced that there was something going on upstairs
Aquilonia signaled Name to get out here and get with the program.
As the fit hit the shan, Nadja decided discretion is not the better part of valor and she whipped out ‘Right Now Bitch’ her greataxe.
The guard then began beating the shit out of Stote/TF with his beard and glaive. He was a hitting master. Stote managed to save vs all the poisoning but took some damage nonetheless.
The guard Ebon had hoped would be heading upstairs instead headed down and disappeared.
The next guard moved to investigate and got closer.
The next guard ended up on the stairs, crapped on a cracker, and then attacked Stote as well.
Esvella asked Nadja if they should move to investigate and Nadja agreed that they should.
Name Told Limeria to find the poison and save the peasants. He then moved out to the stairs and cried out that the guards were devils and attacking the guests.
Stote disengaged and moved down the stairs towards the first floor. He used his own voice to alert Aquilonia as to his identity. He encountered/passed another guard on the down stairs that looked a bit more normal and he (as she) cried out that there were devils up there. The guard commented that ‘she’ seemed out of sorts. Stote blew off the comment and kept moving.
Ebon kept the cry going that there were monsters in the manor/demons in the house.
Limeria came out and advised that perhaps this was not the best way to proceed with things based on the power of the Cassalanters.
Willifort had come out of the office with Lord Victoro Cassalanter on the first floor.
The guards and Ebon exchanged words to the fact that they ARE the guards and they are chasing the imposter. Ebon decided not to let them pass.
Willifort spoke to a guard who went outside.
LVC addressed Stote (as Liba) directly and asked him to stop but Stote continued. LCV
Nadja came out of the kids’ room hauling a huge axe and blessing Esvella and herself.
One of the guards pushed past Name who pressed against Ebon to restrain him. Name called out about the confusion they caused and noted he would speak to Victoro. The guard continued un-phased and sniffed about the ballroom with his cohort.
Limeria/Bonnie told Aquilonia she was sending for help.
Aquilonia tried again to pull Ebon aside. She addressed the musicians to resume.
Esvella continued her blessed path towards the stairway. She asked if they were continuing the attack and Nadja confirmed.
And we’ll resume next week at the top of the order.
2021-10-09 The abandonment by Sam
1 Flamerule 17 Bells mayhem from last week resulted in….
Since Sam had abandoned us, we got some weird story about Milgard and bondage and sech.
Then someone addressed Aquilonia and Ebon and told them she would go down to the kitchen to investigate.
Stote recalled the interaction between him and LVC, which involved domination and a rod. (I think Bill needs to keep his personal life separate from the game).
Stote recognized one of the urchins who, while seeming embarrassed, still went to the Beyonce.
Stote kept moving and yelling about devils.
Name moved up the stairs, and with Esvella’s guidance found the room and was able to get the door open.
As he entered the room, Nadja and Melgard disappeared in a puff of smoke.
Aquilonia and Ebon continued their dancing and while Ebon thought he might worry about his Axe, Bill told him not to. They
Stote, outside the manor, started climbing the walls and a small child noticed him/her (Tiefling disguise). He started working to get through the window.
As Name continued to force his way into the room, he saw Nadja‘s axe and a room strewn with children’s toys (no Steve, regular children’s toys). Moving through the room to the next, he saw a children’s bedroom. One of the four-poster beds had the curtains drawn and a figure on it, which Esvella informed him was the Tiefling Nanny.
Then I had to go see what my dad needed….
Aquilonia and Ebon found the first floor kitchen where a large chef was yelling at everyone. He had something flopping around in his pocket (maybe a vial) and Aquilonia made the comment that the food was fit for Stote. Ebon somehow figured out that this meant made for the poor. Aquilonia tried to distract the cook while Ebon went through the drawers, which actually distracted the cook long enough for Aquilonia to grab his vial and shove it in her special pocket.
Stote had managed to jimmy the window and enter the third floor of the manor and slipped into the toy room. When he quietly called out, Esvella answered and we were all together again.
Name checked the other closet and headed back towards the toy/play room. Name informed Stote of his plan to search the third floor.
Aquilonia and Ebon headed back up to the second floor kitchen and thence to the ballroom. Many people were dancing and there was a commanding presence there leading them into some sort of dance. They moved around the room without being observed making their way towards the powder room.
Name moved back into the toy room and made a closer observation and discovered, in addition to her axe, was her war hammer, backpack, and her handbag. Stote assisted and searched the backpack and found regular shit.
Aquilonia made it back to the powder room and Lamiria asked if Name was single and she, like all girls, completely blew the reply.
Ebon, not wanting to wander into the powder room, hooked up with an old woman for dancing and was able to surmise that the commanding figure in the middle of the ballroom was LVC.
Aquilonia, in the powder room, decided to check out the vial and found the wax seal was intact. The liquid inside looked black and tarry. She handed the bar to Lamaria/Bonnie who examined it as well.
Back with Ebon and his geriatric partner, she introduced herself as Miilal Hycont and he countered with an equally crazy name (I mean Crazymane). They chatted about fairy logs and children’s tears.
Name and Esvella moved into a sitting room and checked it out.
Stote joined the party and checked the first door. It was a linen closet. Two of the downy duvets attacked Stote.
Since Bonnie did not know that much about the vial’s contents, Aquilonia freshened up and headed back out to the ballroom.
Ebon kept playing with Hydcunt and moving about the room.
Stote escaped the closet and closed the door behind him. The blankets continued to try to attack.
Name resisted Stote‘s urging to ‘handle’ those rugs and moved to the door in the south. It was locked. So, Name let Esvela handle the door while he chucked a vial of acid back on the closet door to delay the duvets.
Esvella got the door open and revealed a master bedroom we decorated with fine furniture and friezes.
Ebon was still dancing with Hydcunt and chatting her up. He found some of the history about the Cassalanters. His success as a banker and ‘other things’. Ebon asked her about herself and she answered asking if he was familiar with the Rosznars. When Ebon indicated he had, she let him know she was once married to the Lord Tobem Rosznar ages ago. Now the families were rumored to trade in questionable goods such as perhaps slaves or poisons with are really just commodities. Ebon, while almost reacting like a babe in the woods, did his bet to hide his true feelings. Success.
Aquilonia headed back to the ballroom while Bonnie went to deliver the vial to Stote and Nadja (boy is she in for a surprise). Aquilonia was able to determine that the Hydcunt woman was some sort of apparition and perhaps not there at all. She counseled Ebon to this, but he decided to stick it out.
Stote found that the friezes depicted other planular events of some disturbing type.
Esvella found a lockbox under the bed.
As Name entered, he had Esvela throw him the box, which he successfully forced open releasing a poison gas, which affected both Stote and he for half damage. (Stote is getting kinda low). Inside the lockbox were two ceremonial robes and two golden masks. There were also two sacrificial daggers also made out of gold.
Since Stote was dyin and all, Name gave him two of Nadja‘s healing potions and he felt a bit better. He picked the lock on the next door and found a sitting room. There was a grimoire on the desk along with a golden inkwell, quill, and candlestick. There was also a spell book and 5 vials of a black substance. All of it went into the bag.
Stote searched the bookshelves and found many tomes regarding infernal contracts.
Aquilonia encountered Lady Cassalanter on the way upstairs and while they exchanged pleasantries, the lady continued quickly on her way.
And then it was time. See you next week.
2021-10-16 Time to wrap this party up
1 Flamerule, unknown bells. Still at the party.
Well, the fun continues and we still don’t have a cleric.
Ebon was still dancing with the Hydcunt ghost but he realized that Lady Amalia Cassalanter was headed up the stairs. He tried to get Aquilonia’s attention, but she was still recovering from the stunning attack (ok disrespect) of the LC as she passed.
Name climbed the ladder in the sitting room and, even though he did not detect a door, just knew one had to be there. He punched the ceiling and made an impression that seemed ‘doorlike’. He decided hacking through may be the best option and went to grab his sword from the bag of holding.
Stote didn’t notice anything special either but Esvala noticed a tiny brown hole that she suggested might be fingered for some result.
Name fingered the hole and it opened right up to reveal …more ladder (sort of a vertical dungeon of the mad mage). A small ledge was exposed as well as a thick smell of sulfur. As there was no sign of life currently, Name headed down to continue with the original plan.
Stote headed back towards the master bedroom but we paused for brief discussion about how to proceed. It was decided we should head downwards. Name suggested he might change into a person that is less notorious.
Ebon was still playing with the Hydcunt and talking about trade and auctions. Ebon did his best not to be disgusted. He looked to Aquilonia to bail him out as he continued to squirm, which may have looked like dancing to a ghost.
Aquilonia recovered her wits enough to notice Ebon’s doe eyed plea for help. She moved to assist and Ebon almost screwed it up by looking to the ghost for permissions.
As Stote was about to enter the bedroom he heard someone coming towards us. He urged Name to go up, but I wanted to pull off that slide. Stote scooted across the floor and as they gathered near the ladder, the Lady Cassanlanter entered and questioned our presence. Tiras explained we were pursuing thieves and they had rifled the room and fled through the attic. Lady Amalia seemed to take the bait although she did check a drawer. Stote (as the nanny bolstered the story, but as we went to leave, the lady asked him/her to stay. Keeping the ruse as alive as possible, Tiras (The adventurer formerly known as Name) ran to get help from the Lord Vitoro Cassalanter.
As much as Ebon tried to convince Aquilonia to kill the ghost, Aquilonia demurred. She counseled avoidance instead. She reminded Ebon that the old woman might be really good at hiding the cunt cuz she’s dead. Ebon found this challenging to believe.
The Lady Cassalanter questioned Stote, as the nanny. He noted that there was power in her words, but was not affected. Stote spun a tale of Tiras and Esvala being thieves and LAC sent her to get the house guards and city guards.
Tiras and Esvala continued downstairs (deciding not to vault the rail) and Stote, while heading their way, changed back to Stote.
Ebon and Aquilonia continued to try to shake off Ebon’s recent ghostly experience. Since they could no longer see the cunt (she must have really hidden), they headed upstairs. As we rejoined the full group Tiras continued downstairs (after assuring Ebon he would avoid the old woman) and explained the situation (as he saw it) and while seeming incredulous LVC blew a dog whistle and asked Tiras to follow. As the rest of the group came down, the lord and Tiras went back up.
Tiras and the Lord were moving towards the Lady but Tiras delayed him at the children’s room but only momentarily.
The rest of the group, with some confusion, kept heading down. After we clarified some things, much of confusion seemd to linger, but didn’t affect the motion? Oh, c’mon Ebon – ok, now he’s moving down as well and Aquilonia joined them. As they headed down, Bill pointed out a map error that had previously hidden the entrance to the cellar stairs. Stote immediately tried to use them and the guard, led by Willifort, stopped him. Willifort also stopped Esvala from leaving and urged the whole group to go back upstairs to the party.
Just as Victoro might have thought where the hell is Tiras, he ran quickly into the children’s room having ‘heard’ a noise and ran to ‘discover’ the unconscious form of the nanny on the bed. As Victoro tended to the ‘real nanny’ Name checked the closets and assured the lord he had heard a sound, however the nanny, as she recovered, indicated two dwarves and Esvala were her attackers. Name expressed incredulity that Esvala could be involved, but the lord stalled him in his run to ‘apprehend’ her.
Downstairs, Esvala insisted she be allowed to depart and, with a wave of her hand, disappeared in a puff of smoke. Willifort responded that the guard should escort the rest of the group back to the party and the rest should be summoned from the breakroom. He returned with some of the beardy guards. One of them began to sniff the air and focusing on Stote.
Stote immediately cried out “Devils’, “Devils”and went for the closest door. Iit led to a small covered porch with an exit which was blocked by a guard. Stote was able to reach past him and try the door, but it was locked. He then cried devils and sort of hid behind the guard who responded that there was nothing to worry about and he should just return to the party.
Acting in turn, Aquilonia now held her ground near Ebon.
The beardy guards moved towards Willifort and asked him what to do and WF advised that they should just make sure no one leaves.
The remaining guard again indicated that; here are the stairs, up there is the party, you should go up there.
Name moved with the lord back towards the master bedroom, but stalled again at the door where the acid had splashed.
Ebon, still failing to realize the guards from before, nonetheless came to Stote‘s aid and grappled one of the beardy guards. He began yelling about these guards being demons as well. The guard, while affected, was not crushed. Ebon called to Willifort for aid and when Willifort reassured him that they were indeed guards, Ebon cried out that he was being deceived. Willifort then asked a guard what was keeping the City Guard.
Stote wanted to act paniced and push past the guard, but his internet kept going out and so he called Bill instead. On the call he told Bill he would push past the guard and start pounding on the door yelling, “demons are trying to get me” (he should have yelled “it’s the wooba gooba with the green teeth and let me out”) but it looks like that wasn’t required. The guard withdrew a key and let him out, locking the door behind him but telling him not to return.
But, we shall return…on the 30th.
2021-10-30 Well, now we’re all vaginated
1 Flamerule – somewhere near 5 bells
We start out with different music.
Rejoining the group on the first floor, Aquilonia caught sight of the guard that had released Stote and he began to shift from regular guard in Casslanter livery to well known city watchmen Barnabus Blastwind!
Barnabus apologized for his tardy arrival explaining that Founder’s Day is a big day and he had been planning on attending a party of his own. Willifort addressed an apology to him and explained that it was a somewhat minor matter and BB could return to his party.
While Ebon tried to leverage BB’s superior skills to expose one of the beardy guards, but when he pointed out the fact, both Willifort and BB laughed and seemed nonplussed, indicating instead that perhaps the guest had over-indulged in the party flavors.
Ebon continued to protest and BB closed with him and, in a lower voice, indicated that while Ebon might think these were demons (and BB often felt that way when lying in bed with his wife) they were not. Ebon responded by tackling the guard and trying to get his beard all fluffed up. Joe rolled somewhat poorly for the attack and did a bit of damage.
Aquilonia held her action – aloof from both the instruction to go up stairs and the melee ensuing before her.
Stote, now safely outside, looked south and, not seeing a crowd waiting to arrive, cried out “There’s demons inside, there’s demons inside”. The crowd responded by cheering. This didn’t make him very happy and so he climbed up the wall and re-entered the house through the window he had unlocked earlier which immediately exposed him to the view of Victoro Cassalanter. Once again, his warnings about demons fell on deaf ears as LVC asked Tiras if this was one of the thieves. Tiras said he couldn’t be sure.
Things continued to unravel downstairs, and someone cried, “There’s Drow in the basement”. Willifort sent a guard upstairs to fetch the lord. The guard ran right past Aquilonia who observed a group outside, including 3-Strings, trying to get in.
Tiras moved to ‘grab’ Stote and asked him to ‘splain himself. Stote stuck to his story and Tiras told him we’d sort things out. LVC asked Stote what he saw and Stote laid it on thicker and heavier as he went. LVC then spoke to Stote tried to change his mind with a bit of magic, but failed. Stote detected and tried to act as if he had been affected, but noticing LCV didn’t seem to be buying it, ‘swooned’ into Tiras who asked LCV what to do. LCV said, “let us take him downstairs.”
Downstairs, Willifort indicated there seemed to be more happening than was first thought and BB indicated that perhaps Ebon should be sent to the drunk tank. Aquilonia moved over to Ebon and touched him lightly asking him to stop and go back upstairs and dance. WWED failed to take Aquilonia‘s side, and Ebon continued pummeling the guard who was begging BB to help.
Amidst the melee, Ebon realized that his opponent was faking damage and went to attack his clothes instead. He didn’t seem too successful at first but Ebon was inspired to roll even more poorly.
Aquilonia told Ebon that, if he didn’t stop, he shouldn’t come home, and moved upstairs.
Willifort went to the door to handle the unruly band, telling them that they were not booked for this gig and Mytrim Merig (3-Strings) assured him he was booked as a surprise for the lord and lady. There was much banter – and 3S managed to win the day?
BB announced he was going to check out what was meant earlier when someone yelled out “There’s Drow in the basement”.
As Tiras reminded the lord that he had fetched him for the lady. As it seemed as if this might win the day, a guard came up crying, “There’s Drow in the basement” (how many times will I have to type that) and the lord, with some disgust, headed downstairs at speed. Name checked with Stote and they headed downstairs as well.
Ebon, sorting things out after el banyo, observed that everyone had left him there in the midst of killing a guard and gone off to do other things. He decided there wasn’t much point to this and shoved the guard away and went to join Barnibus heading downstairs. As he went to join BB, he noticed that BB seemed to be sneaking. He flipped off the group and followed BB.
The guards, who had been standing around until now, called out to Willifort who remained embroiled with the bards at the door. Even the beardy guard calling out seemed to have no effect.
As Eboin joined BB on the way downstairs, he asked for an explanation to which BB replied, “be patient my boy.”
Aquilonia only got as far as the start of the stairs and looked back to see Ebon disengage and move towards the other door. She sighed and moved to join him. One of the guards grabbed her and explained that the party was upstairs. Aquilonia told him to remove his hand, which intimidated the guard into releasing her and apologizing. She continued after Ebon…
Tiras and Stote continued downstairs with Tiras telling Stote to move at speed and follow the lord. As he passed the guard, he pushed them forward, urging them to join the lord in the basement.
As LCV moved through the main hall, Willifort asked if he wanted the bards to play and LCV firmly said ‘NO’. The bard group started to depart with heads hung.
BB and Ebon, a little ahead of the group, saw the standard clutter of a basement with trunks and good for storage. BB paused for but a moment and, after peering into a room to the south. When Ebon seemed suspicious, BB faced shifted for a moment and revealed one of ‘Bonnie’s’ friends who assured Ebon he was there to help find the gold and foil the plan. Aquilonia overheard and mentioned the carriage house which caused BB to advise that the gold has likely been moved by now.
LCV, catching up, questioned everyone’s presence, but was molyfied when BB reassured him that he had come to investigate the ‘Drow in the basement”.
Stote arriving in the cellar noted the same furnishings and the cold.
LVC tried to impede BB who responded curtly. LVC instructed BB to wait outside and surprise, surprise, surprise, BB accepted.
Aquilonia detected a spell had been cast and, while not sure what it might have been, she knew it was enchantment, and a high-level one at that. Ebon also noted BBs unusual demeanor.
LVC then turned to the group and told them to go back and enjoy the festivities. Ebon responded that he could assist and, with an advantageous persuasion, convinced the LCV to help. He did ask Ebon to turn around and face Aquilonia.
Aquilonia was able to partially observe him but only until he moved south and then came the sound of grinding stone. Ebon and Aquilonia quickly confirmed that she had his back with hauty assurances and pleasant half-orc smiles.
Continuing to neglect Stote and Tiras, Ebon moved on as LVC cried ‘No’ and headed down those stairs we still can’t see as we are frozen in place.
As soon as Bill unfroze us, it was time to kick-ass. Tiras used his first action to put an arrow into the beardy guard and missed once, then critted.
Initiative kicks in…
Aquilonia held her action.
Tiras did not and put two more into the beard guard taking him down. He moved farther into the basement and withdrew Ebon’s axe for the BOH.
LVC moved farther down the stairs and cried out Jarlaxel.
The remaining guards followed LCV to the south. LCV started back…
Stote moved in and slung guard 2, then being drunk, applied Hunter’s mark after the fact and did enough extra damage to take G#2 out.
Ebon, not knowing his axe was handy, moved forward but Tiras yelled out “Hey, you want this?”. Ebon turned back and retrieved his axe and continued south.
Tiras moved to guard both the party and the stairs and held his action
LVC got to the top of the stairs, saw his dead guard, and said, “Betrayed on both sides”. His face contorted in rage, he pointed at Ebon and said ‘Kill her”. Ebon resisted and raged instead.
The ‘guards’ moved forward and used their glaives to attack Aquilonia mostly missing but hitting once.
Stote moved into the room and attacked doing some minor damage.
Ebon moved in as well and attacked LVC.
Aquilonia moved back a bit and cast fireball, shielding Ebon while she went.
Tiras, having held his action, shot the Lady Cassalanter as she breached the stairs. He did some damage but she retaliated with a fireball of her own. Name saved, but Aquilonia did not and went down.
Name’s next action was to continue to fire arrows until she finally went down.
LVC the whipped out his rod and tried to charm Ebon and Stote. Stote failed, was inspired to fail again, and then finally saved. Ebon, not being a Path of the Berserker barbarian did not auto-magically resist the charm.
What nefarious plans Bill has for Ebon…will have to wait until next week.
2021-11-06 What will Ebon do?
….Finding out that Ebon had indeed not saved… LVC told him to “Defend Me”. Ebon moved between the lord and Stote.
The beardy guard attacked Stote who was dancin’ on the ceiling. However, since the ceiling is feelin’ pretty low. His beard missed but his Glaive hit and caused him to stop concentrating on his hunter’s mark. It also inflicted on Stote an infernal wound which may cause additional damage later.
Another beardy guard moved up to attack Name but missed twice.
Name heard Mirt coming and stating that there had better be a good explanation to which Name responded “There is a good explanation, they signed a pact with Asmodeus!” Name then also heard the lady Cassalanter talking about stuff and noting that her servant had fallen.
Stote tried to stabby the guard but missed and then disengaged to move to Aquilonia (Oh what a feelin’ Stote is rollin cross the ceilin’).
Ebon, charmed by LVC’s rod, moved to attack one of the beardy guards, missed, heard Victorio’s new request not to attack that guy and went and attacked the bearded devil attacking Name.
Aquilonia made her death save (Bill said it)
Ammalia Cassalanter 2 said something about us being them. Mirt answered “I know him, that’s my man” to which Name retorted “and I have done my job, I have the contract right here.”.
Then Name stepped back and attacked the beardy guard, batting 500.
LVC ran forward and announced “There are devils in here! Attack them”.
Mirt ran into the room and gave back the super sword to Name and drew alongsword as well.
The BrdDvl#2, firmly thrown under the bus of betrayal, attacked….Mirt and did a bit of damage.
The guards (including the fresh ones from upstairs, milled about doing pointless guard shit .
Stoe gave Aquilonia a potion with stunning effectiveness. He then turned to watch our backs.
Ebon – uh oh – gotta go – Ebon attacked the beardy guard and then, under Victorio’s instructions, moved to guard him.
Then one of the Ammalia’s got on board with the act and started blaming the devils as well.
There were some exchanges where we hear or learn: 1) LVC indicated he knew of both Stote and and his mother. 2) LVC leaned in to Stote and whispered come see me later. 3) Name indicated that more devils had fled south. 4) Mirt was somewhat cautious about blaming Jarlaxel without more information. 5) Jalaxel wears hats!
Ebon, having been knee-capped, held his action.
Aquilonia went pretty real on us. Speaking truths and focusing on the slight the guard had done to her before, was molyfied by the fact that he laid dead on the floor.
Name kept dropping hints that the Cassalanters must be innocent and that we should investigate further.
Stote wondered where the devil had escaped to and asked Mirt what he felt was best. Mirt replied that we should ferret out these nefarious beings.
The Lady Cassalanter thanked us and presented us with a Staff of healing. At first she wanted to give it to Ebon, but after Ebon balked, she presented it to Tiras, who thanked her and assured the Cassalanters that they could count on the Baconeers for aid and to keep their secrets safe.
Breeze through – We all end up going down south and finding a sub-basement that looked like it may have been used for some rituals. Some searching was done that appeared fruitless except to determine that Mirt was in on the ruse.
The one item that stood out (cuz Bill said it did) was a single black boot that Nadja was wearing.
We wrapped up sort of informally now having a casual relationship with the Cassalanters and improved relationship with Mirt.
We did some experiencing and BS-ing and we ‘ll not be playing on 2021-11-13. See you on the 20th for “2021-11-20 Back to the hallways….”
2022 – Another year of adventuring – 30 Chapters
On to Skullport – 1/08/22 – 01/29/22 – 3c
2022-01-08 Back to the hallways….
Roughly 56 days later than expected (ok exactly, but who’s counting… (Me)
Bill recapped shit that we did not know, like, when he let us know that the pervy dwarven clothier (Melgrath) was actually Jarlaxle in disguise. Jarlaxle enchanted Nadja with a trigger word and enlisted her charmed aide in the theft of the Cassalanter Horde. While things may have gone flawlessly some acolytes did try to interfere but Jarlaxle and Nadja managed to fight through and Nadja got 3% of the horde (30k – instant math).
Jarlaxle, while not a perfect gentleman, only did what Nadja allowed.
The group returned to Trollskull and invented Dinner Bacon (thicker and cooked a bit less crisp than breakfast bacon.) We also utilized Peppered, Mapled and Regular. Some bread and preserves were the accompaniment.
Aquilonia got a mental message from Nadja asking where she was and Aquilonia responded that we were baconing.
Nadja replied that she (and the boys) should head on up and bring the bacon, she had a surprise.
Aquilonia summoned Ebon mentally and we all went on up.
As soon as we saw Nadja, with a keg of beer and lounging on a pile of coins. Ebon ran across the room and embraced Nadja. Name set down the bacon and dashed over to embrace Nadja….
‘s gold.
As we focused on the return of our comrade (and the gold), Stote, always the defender of bacon, noticed a stranger sampling a bit of our dinner. He decried this abuse of bacon and called the newcomer to identify himself as Wakanga, Aquilonia‘s teacher.
After magically refreshing the bacon Wakanga and Aquilonia moved off to Willow’s old room to discuss stuff.
While they were gone, Nadja asked about her bag and goods and Name, having closely enough estimated the gold, answered her by giving back her bag of holding and then letting her regale us with the tales of her time with Jx.
Nadja then regaled us with the tales of what she and Jarlaxyl did (within limits) and we all decided to…..
discuss our options for stashing the cash (settling on Aquilonia‘s father and his connections) and finding options for getting to Skullport. While some unnamed person suggested Gretta, Nadja suggested JX who already had a few boats. She reached out to him via the psychic network and he answered that we should meet at ‘The Heartbreaker’ in the dock ward.
We all headed down there and located the ship (yes, as Joe pointed out, it’s a ship) and then we went back in time and space and took care of the giant pile of gold, stashing it, as discussed but not acted upon, with Aquilonia’s father and his connection.
Then we went back to the docks and resumed where we left off with Stote having over tipped an old man who pointed us in the right direction for the ship and then pointed two others at us for perhaps a quick coin. After a bit of chat about it, Stote and Ebon took the frontal approach while Name acted distracted and kept an eye out as well. The two assailants quickly fled. Stote called some threats after them and then we moved on.
Approaching the Heartbreaker, we noted no other hands on board other than an older dwarf with an eyepatch. Nadja meant to be all ‘down low’ and drop Jarlaxl’s name, but the older dwarf was indeed, Jarlaxl. He led us on the ship where we met a crew of capable looking semen, who, on closer inspection by Aquilonia, turned out to be drow under an illusory guide. She alerted Name who played it off well.
The Heartbreaker turned out to be a bit less than the ‘Eye Catcher’ but, after a few jokes, and words that revealed that Jx does his research and Name likes to joke, we all headed into Jaralxyl’s cabin where we discussed the better part of valor and the citizenry of Skullport, Our reputation with the Xanathar, Stote’s mom, Jx’s profit and other things that we didn’t seem to understand.
Then I was drinking a bit and missed just ton of kewl role playing where we took much of the risk from Jarlaxyl, decided how to get there from here (or actually where we’ve been before and maybe, just maybe his ship might be in Skullport if we needed a quick getaway.
We came to some agreements but were unable to produce any map that could be improved by Jarlaxyn to give us a leg up on the trip.
Nadja pre-paid the agreed upon 500 and with a cuddle and peck on the cheek, it was time to go dancin’.
2022-01-22 Guess I didn’t drink as much as I thought
2 Flamerule 1492 DR 11 Balls
We have just left the “Heartbreaker”. It was a warm day, the humidity made it somewhat muggy and the on and off rain made the day, though warm, dreary.
Stote wanted to seek out a magic shop for additional bags of holding, potions of healing and, dare we hope for, a portable hole?
As we boarded the dray we noted that much of the town was still asleep and the usual bustle had been replaced with the trudging of the city’s cleaning crews.
Looks like our Drey driver is from New York and is taking the long way round. He also decided to blow the tip and turn north when we needed to go a bit further west.
As the main group went to Aurora’s, Name and Aquilonia headed a bit farther north intent on getting to the Tower of The Order.
First on Deck was Stote Ebon and Nadja at Aurora’s Emporium. Catching a voice out of the depths of the shop, they managed to get an assistant to help who was a bit surprised to see such a large(?) group. After ascertaining that this was a catalog shop, the Stote‘s asked about other options.
Name and Aquilonia continued North towards the tower.
The assistant at Aurora’s advised that Portable Holes usually went to auction but he could check the catalog. That quickly resulted in Ebon drumming his beefy fingers impatiently. The clerk furrowed his brow in exasperation and, turning to the next page, located a PH at one of the other Aurora’s in the area.
Name and Aquilonia, having arrived at the tower, decided that Aquilonia would check in with her guld and Name would kill time checking out what they had for sale along the order of storage.
Aquilonia stopped by the guild officesto get her spell book updated (cuz there was too much sex this week {but not for the dog}) . Aquilonia wanted Quilam to add some items to her spellbook so Name, throwing a comment over his shoulder about some cleaning spells, headed down to see what wares might be for sale.
Stote, Ebon, and Nadja arrived at Aurora’s on Tusk street and demanded the portable hole that they did not have and settled on adding another bag of holding. The youthful attendant, having been attentive and polite (if somewhat anxious) was firm in his correction of the group’s mistaken pricing. He indicated he was no hornswoggler and directed the party’s eyes to the catalog. As Aurora’s is no pawnshop, haggling was frowned upon. The group decided to hit the pawnshops since Nadja reminded them of her already existent BOH and, after tipping a copper to give a message to Name and Aquilonia should they show up. Nadja then passed it along telepathically to Name for free.
Name headed down to the enchantment area of the Tower of the Order and let them know he was looking for storage items and that they could pass a message to Aquilonia if they found one.
Heading down to Aurora’s (the first one, not the second one) Aquilonia and Name learned of the switcheroo with Stote‘s group and, in asking for other storage items (assuming that the other group will get the BOH) they learned that there was Wazuls’ Wonderous Wallet-sized Wardrobe which instantly gave Name a chubby, but then, learning that it cost 9,000 GP, he went limp again. However, the proprietor helped him recover some blood flow by selling Name Heward’s Handy Spice pouch for a mere 130 GP. The deal was done, cilantro will flow like water and Ebon’s roars shall deafen the gods. Aquilonia and Name headed to a tavern on High Street called The Sword’s Rest and, after dropping off the note below at Riautar’s Weapons, had lunch and waited for the rest of the party.
My dearest Roni,
Though it has only been a few days, each time we pass the shop I am reminded that the sharpest weapon your family has crafted could surely not slice as cleanly to my heart as your absence does each time I think of you anywhere but here. I hope that things are as well for you as they can be and I hope that such longing as my own does not distract from your family duties.
Until you return I shall be less,
Stote, Ebon, and Naja arrived at Wakeen’s where they found the man himself a bit hungover, but able to deal. No BOH and no vorpal anything, but he still had the bracers if the coin was right. When asked about potions, Wakeen directed them back to Verda’s Potions and Poisons, across the way. Ebon made one more run for the bracers at a discount, but was unsuccessful. Ebon swayed a bit more at that.
Ebon, Nadja and Stote got to Verda’s and found her to be a lizard folk with odd goggles and a somewhat grumpy demeanor. She had a fair amount of potions ranging from regular healing (50g) to ‘It’s gonna hurt’ (5,000gp). Ebon, once again using his superior negotiating skills, aggravated this shopkeeper who almost gave up. But after Ebon looked like he was leaving, she was convinced to sell 20 regular healing potions for 1,000 GP.
We all met up for a snack and an ale at The Sword’s Rest and then, figuring out that we were a few coins short of the 900GP needed for the BOH, we headed over to the Portal.
We arrived to a brawl going on and, while Ebon was more than willing to help, Durnin waved him off in no uncertain terms and finished clearing the room by himself. Some of the combatants were Xanathar thugs and Ebon let them know that he knew that they knew.
Aquilonia also noticed the winged serpent logo of the Zentarim on at least one of the combatants.
3 Strings was playing upstairs and, upon seeing the group, started to wander down. Not quick enough though to stop us from reaching the bar. There was some new young kid at the bar who took his cue from the room and set us up with ales for no apparent coin.
By the time we were blowing the froth off 3-Strings was finishing a fine song of adventure ending on a line like “who wants to die in their beds”.
As he finished Nadja found a mask on the floor that, as soon as she found it, caused us all to recall one of the Xanathear was wearing a similar mask, but partially torn off. Upon closer inspection, the mask drew a striking resemblance to Yagra, right down to the hair, but in a mocking caricature type of way. Ebon would have killed the Xanathar wearing it, but they were all gone by this point.
Stote and Ebon should have no problem remebering them in the future. Not necessarily by name, but certainly by the size hole one would have to dig if they deserved burial upon dying.
Ebon managed to get Ezekial (the new guy behind the bar) to get a round of StonePiss, and Name found that Durnin only had the one room (not rooms Bill).
Aquilonia and Name went off to a corner to discuss Wakanga’s dissatisfaction with her progress to date.
When we wandered back we heard something about Stote’s mom being called ‘The Kept’ or “The Kept Maiden’. 3-strings was advising that Mirt didn’t feel the party was necessarily Harper material, but they might be able to help out as long as it didn’t reveal too much. He was pointing out that Mrs Stote seemed to be more hidden away lately and that, while she used to roam about Skull port with a guard, Navareen, but they hadn’t been seen recently.
3-Strings had been ‘cleared’ to reveal that recently Stote’s mom has been seen near the ‘Nightshade’s Caress’ on the upper levels of Skullport. At this point, Stote , somewhat emotional, threatened murder while 3 Strings cauttioned discretion. Stote asked that we be included and we got a recap of the above.
With a bit of zipping along, we went back to Trollskull, rested, collected some cash, Aquilonia bought the BOH from Aurora’s and we zoomed to the third level without much adieu.
As we entered the third level, a voice called out “Be Ye Trollskulls? Name answered “We are the Baconeers”. The voice came from an armored creature who said that his lady., Liscana, might have a task for us but it would require trust. He went on to note that his people, the hobgoblins,m were at odds with the Drow and their leader(?) Azrock and this Lady Liscana had seen in a vision/premonition/dream that showed that we would help in exchange for passage into Skullport. He introduced himself as Abacab (Aba) and Name , Stote, Ebon (as ‘Security’), Nadja (as the dwarf cleric that will kill you if you mess with us), and Aquilonia as the Lady Aquilonia.
Aba then offered to guide us to his lady using a potion that would make him incorporeal and allow him to slip past the Drow. He then indicated that we could eat some fish eggs and become the fish that created the eggs and Aba could carry us in a pitcher.
Stote suggested that he could follow as if as a shadow (Gloom Stalker) and not be seen.
Name had him draw out a map which seemed to be clear enough to follow but Stote, being more fearless than most (is that how you spell foolish?) grabbed the first egg and ate it. Now that we had a great guinea pig, it was time to play cards and wait to make sure Stote recovered.
Stote returned feeling as if no time had passed. With the test successful, we all took and egg and ….
we’ll find out next week
BTW – While gaming with Abacab, we learned that:
The tribe has lost confidence in their leader Asrock because he seemed to be losing his strength and no longer had a warrior’s spirit much needed to fight off the Drow.
He is one of the last loyal elite guards to the lord and that is why the lady trusts him.
The passage we might get to Skullport is discreet, but comes out on the lower levels. (How many levels are there?)
2022-01-29 Not tonight, I’ve got a headache
3 Flamerule 1492 DR Unk-Balls
Name went over the now combined map to confirm the route and the plan. (Name will drink the potion, the rest, including Abacab, would eat the eggs and go in the pitcher. Nadja firmly reminded Abacab that it would be someone’s ass if there is a double dealing.
As we got ready to go, Aba pleaded again for aid and then went all fishy on us. Name marked him with some in and then we all piled in. Stote, Nadja, and Aquilonia, then, with some temetry Ebon. Name oiled himself down until he, and all his gear seemed to float.
It took some getting used to the way movement worked and even a brief trial of ‘wall moving’ left him disoriented. Deciding it was best to follow the path, Name used the map he had made to guide him past a small room with drow and quaggoth, then to a larger ‘prison’ room with large brutish creatures taunting prisoners. He kept on path to the south and turned to a small room with whistles dips, chains, whips and perhaps even candle wax on the nipples. This might make sense as the room to the south had four scantily clad women enjoying the sounds of torture drifting in from ajoing rooms. They were draped wantonly across Chaise Lounges made of dark wood and Spider Silk Chaise Lounges. They were looking pretty good so Name took a mental note for later…of the circle of entrails on the floor that had strange text written around it.
Moving into the natural caverns, one room had a screaming spider drow (Drider) that looked a bit ‘off’. Name kept on to the river. It passed pretty much as mapped with some additional openings. But he got to where we expected and found in the openings, the following: Tummy Room – 12 hobgoblins signs of combat; Liver room 6 bugbears – Standards like Abacab as pennants on the wall a dripping Bloody Handprint inside a Red Triangle on a yellow background; Kidney room lower – strange large undead (Beholder); Kidney room upper – an astounding dangerous horde of 2 whole goblins; Pancreas room – Spikey Testicle Thing (Teeth and eyes on testicles) and finally, Bowling Alley – as described. Added everyone to the bowl and mixed in the potion and poof – they’re all back
We did a final prep and, with threatening glances towards Abacab, which Ebon will probably continue, asked him to lead the way to Liscana.
We followed him out to the South and West then north through Ebon’s complaints to a doorway where he greeted persons unknown. They spoke in Goblin so Name understood There were six goblin scribes sitting at desks and a hobgoblin at a lecturn debating the length breaks, docked pay, and too many crinkle fries. Abacab pointed out to Metloff, the other hobgoblin, that we were those who were expected and Mtlf told Bartleby to take our information and give us visitors sashes. Name used his real name of TirasTylmarande
The group now got the feeling that folks were a bit disrespectful of the warlord Azrok.
Abacab said he would lead us to our quarters which didn’t sound like Liscana (Said Ebon) but off we went. Ending up eventually at a room where eight beds were crammed together we found mollusks in a bowl. As he was departing, Stote couldn’t help but notice Abacab’s salivary glances towards the bowls and made sure to insist that Aba have ‘some for the road’. However, Stote reminded him of the urgency of finding Skullport.
We settled in and ate some snails (Seasoning them and cooking them up).
Before too long a female bugbear, introducing herself as Liscana, apologized for not being able to introduce us to Azrok as this would make him look even weaker for needing help from a woman. She reminded us of her vision (from her deity) and asked for our discretion adding an extra dig towards the darf. Nadja grudgingly obliged.
Liscana informed us that “Azrok was the son of a hobgoblin warlord, but was born blind. While this would usually mean death to this breed, Azrok’s mother, a sorceress, crafted a dagger that not only allowed him to see, but also to be successful in combat. Many thought this to be a gift from Globluviate and he led the group here to Stromkuhldur where they lived for many years in prosperity. However, over the last three decades, times have turned for the worse. A band of duergar came through and may have stolen the dagger leaving Azrok to fend against the fates without this boon. Liscana has worked to hide his weakness, but his ‘loyal’ guards have let slip the reality and were banished for their transgressions. The remainder of the tribe continues to lose faith and only a few, such as Abacab, remain true to their leader.
She went on to report that those that stole the dagger were likely from the clan IronEye and are likely in Skullport. She would show us the way and hope that we could return the dagger for a reward of 1,000 dragons. Stote assured Liscanba that there would be no problem killing Duergar or returning the dagger.
We concocted a ruse that we were envoys from the surface who were there to negotiate reinforcements to help clear the caverns. These seemed so plausible that Stote made a mental note to keep a closer eye on Liscana.
Then we chatted about stuff and then went back to the game.
Liscana then said she would have Abacab lead us to the SkullPort passage.
Abacab returned and led the way to Skullport……
One room of note was a large room with a conical roof 50′ above. Clouds of phosphorus spores hung around lichens above. Before we could enter Abacab stopped us, warning of shriekers above and led us on a special path that would not alert them. Name, Stote, and Aquilonia all tried to make a note of the path chosen.
After about 10 minutes in the tunnel, we came out to the town of Skullport. We could hear and smell a foundry ahead and moved into the lower levels.
We quickly fell into ‘standard’ marching order.
Skullport had the looks of a city – a city that was maintained by children, run by criminals, and not kept well (sort of like Detroit – including the soot).
We’ll follow-up with the local municipal departments next session…
Wrecking up Skullport – 02/05/22 – 05/28/22 – 9c
2022-02-05 Skullport here we come are!
4 Flamerule 1492 DR – UNK-B
After reading in the notes…..
Abacab had reminded us to store the ‘guest sashes’ rather than display with pride that we knew the Azrok’s tribe back at Stromkuhldur.
Previously they had used bronze sashes but the duergar had used them to infiltrate Stromkuhldur in the aforementioned raid.
The Skullport ambassador is a strange looking creature with tentacles coming down from his face. He had recently returned from a visit to Stromkuhldur (named for the dwarves that founded the area) where he had helped procure supplies ‘Ulquess’ aka as ‘Phil’ had mentioned upon his return that he needed to meet someone from Waterdeep there.
Abacab indicated that we should look him up for tips on where to find the duergar and/or the dagger.
Ebon wondered aloud what our cover story was (other than the really great one that everyone in Skullport already knew, but Bill didn’t.
Abacab’s final caution was not to phuck things up with Phil so we’ll try to be cool. As he departed, he advised that Phil might be found at an Inn, or Tavern or something starting with black. (Racist) it is near the port.
After a quick check of our gear, we harkened back to some of the things Jarlaxl had told us about Skullport. How it was populated by disreputable wretches and persons of the worst sort.
Stote further assuaged Ebon’s fears by assuring him that this place was run by the Zhentarin and not the Xanathar (those people with whom they had created such a ruckus.) He was exactly incorrect, but Ebon had great confidence in this.
Stote announced that the best place for information was taverns. Ebon nodded sagely, and off we went.
A smog hung in the air that seemed to be a year’s worth of soot, trapped in mist from the port that simply couldn’t escape.
As we passed the first building, Stote directed us using his urchin sense. Name suggested trying to locate the port based on looking for a clearing, but as none was apparent, we headed after Stote to the south.
As we passed piles of trash, the only people we saw were dead and it looked like they had all been that way long enough to not even smell anymore.
Hearing some voices ahead, Stote approached, nodding to the drunk looking one and asked after the local tavern. The stranger answered, indicating his companion was Crumb, but offering little other information. While he was offering to sell the information, Ebon moved forward and put his hands on his hips. Not in an effeminate. ‘I’m posing’ way, but in a stern, ‘I’m a half-orc way’.
As Stote down-dressed him, the group noticed that the sign behind him read, the Sword and Sextant.
A little back and forth later, Gregory directed us to the tavern (yep, near the port) and off we went.
Very soon, we noticed that the building to our north appeared to be an inn, so we decided to try to enter. Since we weren’t on the right side of the building, we made our way around.
We noticed that in many places large rocks and rocky formations had fallen from the ceiling or cropped up from the floor as if earthquakes and tremors were fairly common.
Less common appears to be windows with lights. Many were boarded up and the buildings looked abandoned.
Squeezing around one of the rocks that had fallen on the inn and then later been built around, the group again marveled at the construction of the city. Three levels high with a motley arrangement of walkways, stilt buildings and hodge-podge constructions, Skullport was truly a ‘wonder’?
Stote saw a couple gentlemen approach, but they ducked down an alley, so he asked the drunks that were still there where the tavern was and got directions to the “Black Tankard” was back that way (west). Seeing that we were a bit ‘higher classed’ than the normal SP denizen, our new host directed us to the Flagon and the Dragon.
While Stote seemed ready to leave things to chance, Name reminded the group that Phil might be found at the Tankard.
Upon mention of Phil, our drunken advisors noted that he was there now. Off to the Tankard.
As we approached the ‘Tankard’, the smell (and sight) of vomit was strong. One professional of the liquid exhale raised his head, smiled and said…”Too much worm wiss.” That caught Nadja‘s attention as in we went.
We noted a couple minotaurs in some of the darker corners as well as a ‘voyeur’ (see picture). The odd looking dwarf behind the bar asked for our calm noting all he had was worm whiz. Stote threw him a gold and bought a rond for all.
Winking at the minotaur to his right, Ebon offered a toast and that was about when we noticed Phil.
Worm whiz looks and tastes like it sounds. That didn’t stop Ebon and Nadja from drinking first theirs and then Aquilonia’s and Name’s (in that order).
A hobgoblin seemed to be Phil’s manservant.
Counseling caution, the bartender took Nadja‘s order for another round and promptly served up 4, I mean 5, more cups.
When the bartender tried to direct us elsewhere, Tiras spilled the beans that we were here to find Phil. Things got edgy and the bartender said something about “Keep it inside, we can’t let the 13 see this”. Then one of the minotaur move to the door and…initiative.
Since we all rolled pretty poorly (Stote twice) , Aquilonia led of the combat with a held action.
Nadja said “Any one of you fucking pricks move, and I’ll execute every one of you motherfuckers!” and then cast Spirit Guardians. Name, though a bit out of position, was still included, thank god. (When someone goes into the game and they fall on their knees and they pray to God that their character doesn’t die, or that fortune doesn’t turn against them, or that enemies don’t pour out that door endlessly, who do you think they’re praying to? Now, you go ahead and read your Bible, playa, and you go to your church and with any luck, you might win the annual raffle. But, if you’re looking for God, he was sitting behind the DM screen, Feb 5th, his name is Bill, and he doesn’t like to be second guessed.)
Stote went next and cut a couple pieces of the minotaur first with one hand and then with his off-hand. He then moved nimbly away.
The hobgoblin tried to jump up on the bar to attack, but Nadja‘s Spirit Guardians were having none of it. They hit hard enough to leave the hobgoblin dead on the floor and tak a chunk out of the bar.
The bartender cried out “Not my bar” and Stote replied that we were going to kill him anyway.
Minotaur 1 went next and managed to survive the SGs enough to deal some damage to Nadja which wasn’t enough to kill her, but was enough to drop her concentration.
Minotaur2 was squared off with Name and, after we figured out that he did only have 5′ reach, he did 17 to Name.
Name retorted by heaping damage on the minotaur (53)
The spectator complained about high ticket prices at events and then shot a beam from his eye which froze Stote. He also shot a beam at Tiras that caused him to be afraid…very afraid, but not enough that he couldn’t attack the minotaur.
Now it’s Phil’s turn. After remembering how to draw a cone, Phil cast an undetectable spell (That Aquilonia couldn’t counter) and everybody failed. This put Nadja in the red.
Ebon attacked and would have missed, except for the War Gods blessing cast by Nadja. Then it was choppy-choppy time for Phil. Ebon unloaded on him twice for some good damage.
Droon, the bartender, who had been cowering behind the bar, complained about damage to the bar loudly and then grew from a diminutive Duergar into a large sized something or other.
Aquilonia then used the last held action Bill will firebolted Ulquess for a bit of le damage
Then she didn’t hold her action, but instead, fireballed the room. This took out the recently grow up bartender and minotaut 1 and laid some heavy damage on Phil.
Nadja then also turn her affections to Phil and heaped some more damage on his pile. Then we had to wait for Sam to repeat Nadja‘s comment as she killed the mindflayer with her second blow.
Stote held his action (cuz he was paralyzed) but he made his save, so next round he’s gonna kick ass.
Minotaur2 was willing to deal, but even’s even so…
Name, because he was under the efects of a fear spell, tried to attack, but missed due to the fear spell….and he failed his wisdom save.
Stote yelled ot that he would live, if he just killed the spectator. M2 hefted his axe and charged the spectator.
M2’s axe was great as he chopped into the Spectator. IT was not great enough though it did some damage.
The Spectator then shot Stote with a beam and M2 with a beam as well. Stote was confused and we don’t know about M2.
Ebon thought his axe might be greater and chopped into the Spectator as well but only hit once.
Aquilonia firebolted from a distance.
Nadja moved in to make Stote warmer but putting the heal on him.
Stote moved in to and made the spectator his favorite foe. He then attacked with a couple thrown daggers
M2, looking confused, attacked Nadja but missed.
Name, hiding behind Nadja, hit her with a quick cure wounds from the staff and then failed his saving throw against fear.
The spectator then decided to get into the game and tried to bite Ebon, but missed.
Ebon cast retaliatory strike (but with his axe). His second stroke was sufficient to achieve the desired (by everyone but the spectator) effect.
Just about then, we heard a sort of sucking sound, and a intellect devourer (braindog) popped out of the hobgoblin.
Name misty stepped in front of it, Aquilonia firebolted it, and Nadja finished it off with her axe.
The minotaur went to move towards his friend. WWED went in his favor, so Ebon just made him flinch.
Just as we started communicating with the Minotaur, I had to go.
When I got back, we were talking westerns.
Apparently, the minotaur indicated that Ulquess was friends of the big boss (indicating Nadja realized that the mind flayer may have been seeing the Hobgoblins with intellect devourers.
Apparently, the minotaur indicated that Ulquess was friends of the big boss (indicating Nadja realized that the mind flayer may have been seeing the Hobgoblins with intellect devourers.
Found a bunch of normal equipment and armor
16 platinum (after Stote threw what he was trying to pocket back into the pot.)
230 silver pieces (Strongbox) plus 2 G (we paid)
2022-02-26 Skullport II – The Cleanup and Caress
4 Flamerule 1492 DR – UNK-Bells
We surveyed the destruction we had created, noticing there were many holes in the walls where light, and now some disturbing mumbling was coming through the walls.
“I smell murder this way” said a voice “I too” said another.
The stranger who had just poked his head through the door noted something his grandmother used to say: “When mindflayers are present, dragons and githyanki are the best of friends”. He then beat feet and invited us to follow.
Not one to be rude, Name took him up on his invitation and dashed after him with Aquilonia hot on his heels. Name shouted to the baffled Minotaur to follow and he seemed smart enough to do so as well.
Endall Beall (the guy we’re following) suddenly said we’re not gonna make it. He turned to the north, muttered a spell and a boarded up door was suddenly open. He looked down a street and said “this is gonna get ugly quick”. We saw he had said this to Crumb and Gregory.
Name hit the minotaur with the staff of healing as it went by cuz he was draggin’ down our speed.
Stote used disguise self to turn into a dirty scuzzbucket (not much of a change) and both he and Name were able to catch a glimpse of something glowing going into the tavern and perhaps a few glows inside as well.
We ducked in and closed the door behind us.
Endall then cast a spell on the opening and it sealed behind us.
Crumb started retching and Endall motioned Gregory to do something, which he tried to do.
As we listened it seemed the voices from before had stopped ‘spelling’ and started searching. The sounds took about 3 minutes to fade.
Once the sounds were gone, our new friend Endall Beall seemed relieved and the introductions began with Tiras introducing himself and Aquilonia and pointing out the minotaur who, after catching the drift of the conversations, introduced himself as Grog.
Endall had indicated he traded in stories and so Tiras opened with the tale of the unprovoked attack that occurred at the bar. Endall gave us a bit of input on the mind flayer and Spectator assuring us that Xanathar would send replacements (or at least investigate).
Endall, not quite as dapper as Tiras, began to fill us in on the 13. Some say they are the spirits of Netherese mages, the netherese being perhaps the source of current humans. Somewhat related to FlameSkulls they may be the force that holds back the gravity that would otherwise cause the space of Skullport to collapse.
He then paused, noting that we were somewhat injured and began to help with the healing.
The room we were in is very old with some cabinets that may still be intact. However, the rest of the room had seen the encroachment of one of the falling stones and the wood was definitely showing the signs of a long life in the most climate that is Skullport.
As Endall Beall was going to start with the Minotaur, Stote (in scumbag guise), indicated that he should likely heal the others first.
Everybody got some points back, including Grog, and we all felt better for it.
He continued about the 13. Indicating that they may not always be too active, but violence brings them out in strength. If you hear them speak, you can tell that they may have left their sanity almost as far behind as their bodies.
There once was a 14, that got created, but Endall didn’t know too much about that one, except that he wasn’t a Netheril, was a volunteer, and was a he.
In theory, had we stayed behind, Endall Beall was fairly certain that we would all be ash.
When Endall began flirtatiously addressing Aquilonia, Ebon stepped over protectively.
Endall didn’t seem to notice too much and offered his hand to move her away from Crumb (who has been known to projectile vomit unexpectedly).
The conversation stayed pleasant enough, so Stote through this would be a good time to search the aforementioned cabinets. He immediately found a body, which made Ebon a bit nervous.
Endall seemed as surprised as everyone else and while Tiras joked with him about it, Stote or Aquilonia noticed a ring on the body which Nadja would later identify as the signet ring of Crishendo Rojnar. Endall had seen him a month earlier in the Black Tankard drinking it up with a bunch of Duergar.
A search of the body revealed just cut pockets and a brown scarf. When Nadja went to examine it she saw the symbol of the hobgoblin clan. The same as our sashes. In fact, it was a sash just like the ones we had been given. Endall advised that the Durgar had been wearing similar sashes.
Name told the tale of how perhaps the Stormcalder tribe, which had asked our group to find some of the envoys (including Elquis) as the ambassador to their tribe, might be being infiltrated by the brain dogs.
Endall seemed to concur, and indicated that the Xanathar might have been looking to expand their influence and that would be just the sort of trick they might use.
The conversation divulged to the currency of Skullport might be better served as food rather than coin. Fruit, even dried, might be as good as gold.
We learned that Skullport is separated into levels from the Crown at the top, to the Dregs, which is where we are now. These are separated by the eloquently labeled middle level.
We concluded a short rest and everyone felt a bit better.
Name asked Endall where the group might find the Nightshade’s Caress. Ostensibly to find someone selling ingredients that our friend Falia needs for a special potion. Tiras also hinted that there was rumored to be a magic dagger in the same vicinity.
We finished the search of the room and then Endall offered to lead us to not only the stairs to the crown but the Caress as well.
As we left our hiding place, we heard a whining coming from the east. The party assumed standard marching order with Endall floating and Grog, after having been told, and then told again how not to remember us, headed back to the bar. Two gold richer and truly, none the wiser.
As Ebon approached the creature, which appeared to be canine, the rats (land fish) scurried away. The creature was dragging itself away, its back legs damaged and burned, trying to find some unknown place to heal or die.
Ebon called Nadja forward and they observed the creature’s injuries and noted it nuzzling Ebon’s hand (not cuz he’s so lovable, but because he had given it some meat). Nadja cast cure wounds on the creature and that was sufficient to get the animal back on its feet.
The party re-adjusted as Aquilonia moved forward to give the animal some water. Nadja, Ebon, and Aquilonia discussed the animal, determining that it was a puppy, large, but a puppy nonetheless.
Aquilonia, jumping on the beef wagon, gave the ‘dog’ some jerky.
After we left the humane society, we continued towards what we hoped was the way to the crown. We passed several more abandoned buildings and more than one gibbet hanging from masts stuck into the ground. Many complete with skeletons.
After a short-ish distance, we came to some stairs. Endall indicated that, since there was little of interest on the middle level, we moved on to the crown.
As we got to the Crown, we saw quite a collection of bugbears, armed and looking somewhat menacing. Endall advised that there were more than the usual number of ‘Sun Death’s’ guards. He went on to state that Sun Death is a stooly of Xanathar and sort of thinks he runs the place. Usually there out on Skull Island and not here in such numbers.
After a bit of reassurance, Endall proceeded, and made his way to the left. The bugbears got out of his way and cautioned him to watch out as; they ‘wouldn’t want anyone getting hurt’.
The walkways had some railings, but it was obvious that a fall might be quite damaging.
We wove our way through the bugbears and eventually wound up at Nightshade’s Caress.
As we entered, we saw a veritable plethora of pharmaceutical ingredients and a mummy in the place of a shop proprietor. The mummy was cooking (or burning) something over the counter but, as soon as our presence was detected the mummy turned; extinguishing the flames, and a voice emanated from its directions and asked “good evening. What brings you to Nightshade’s Caress?”
And with that, Joe had to go and we’ll find out next time.
2022-03-12 Caressing ourselves downstairs again
5 Flamerule and the party, accompanied by Endall, has just entered Nightshade’s Caress in Skullport.
As we watched the crone-like creature behind the counter, we noticed insects and worms moving in and out of it as it moved behind the counter.
In a dry, raspy voice, Nightshade asked why we were here.
Name answered that the local hobgoblin troop had recommended it as well as someone from Waterdeep. Nightshade indicated he could take either coin or trade. In looking about the shop, Name let Stote know that it was his call how to proceed. As we were looking for his mom {Ylluehwyvar Curufine, (Eel-wen-wi-var Koo-roo-fin-ay) also known as ‘The Kept’ or ‘The Kept Maiden’, also known as ‘Winnie’}.
Stote tried vainly to engage Nightshade in locating either the bowstring or some booze. While our host wasn’t familiar with either, he did indicate that the Overflowing Urn might have ‘flammable liquids’, not stone piss Ebon, but flammable liquids.
Nadja happened to notice that Endall had been a bit quieter since we had arrived in the Crown. She got his attention with a gentle (?) nudge and found that Endall was concerned with our location as well as the new information regarding bowstrings and such. Endall indicated that he was also concerned about the increased bugbear presence.
Name had located three potions of ‘minor’ healing and one labeled ‘Potion of Flying’ and he began to haggle with Nightshade to both get the best deal and distract him from the conversation between Nadja and Endall.
Endall continued to voice his concern about the guards and that we could be trapped if they decided to come in and Nadja assured him that he would be a-ok.
The healing potions were 200 GP, or some ingredients or a combo of both mucus of an aboleth, or perhaps the feather of a solar angel (or any angel for that matter), Planetar or Diva. A beholder eye was the next on the list covering the healing potions x2 for the main eye or 400 GP worth of product for a side eye, Spectator eyes were 110 gp and the side eyes were 20 G and the teeth were 20 more.
Stote wondered at the value of one of the skulls and, while they themselves weren’t worth much as they turned to mist, but their teeth might be worth 110.
We decided to see what we could see, around the crown and maybe check out the ‘Overflowing Urn’.
As soon as we left, Stote asked one of the bugbears where to get a drink, to which the bugbear replied that they drink on skull island, but we drink from toilets.
Name countered with a really long and complex joke that he had to repeat as “you go island, drink toilet”. Some good natured scuffling ensued and then we heard the distinct sound of a Spectator in the area. Stote had his hand on his weapon, but it wasn’t needed as they were just dickin’ around.
As we moved by our new friends, Endall was nervous, Nadja reassured, Stote taunted, and Name, well Name just looked good.
We determined that Ebon is 7 feet tall.
As we approached the quartet to the South, they barred our way and so we headed back the other way.
Once we got to a gap, Endall was able to advise that the Overflowing Urn was a place for actual flaming liquids. The place we might find better suited for drinking was the Worm’s Gullet, but we would have to go down to level 2 and come back up to level 3 to get there. Plus, all they had was Worm Wiz, which we didn’t care for earlier.
However, there was the Flagon and the Dragon on the first level, which might be more to our liking. As soon as we got back down, Stote asked Endall what had made him so nervous and he ‘splained about all the bugbears and Skull Island making him nervous and he likes to stay out of trouble. Endall still seemed pensive when Stote wouldn’t expand further on why we were here.
So, we made our way across the first level toward the Flagon and the Dragon, Name paused for a moment to go back and check for the spectator corpse, but Grog (Minotaur) let him know that it was long done.
So, entering the Flagon and the Dragon, we saw Crumb and Gregory, as well as someone who looked like a sailor and a woman who looked like a drow running the bar.
Stote immediately ordered a round for the bar (questioning only slightly the cost) and then the bartender greeted Endall and asked after a story but he demurred. He did counter with a request for Amber Jack however.
Once everyone had their drinks, the drow poured herself a sherry and then gasped a bit when Stote gave her a platinum for a mere 5n2.
After ogling him for a moment, she introduced herself as Cal ‘al and asked what we were doing down here. Stote introduced himself and the Trollskull Baconeers.
Name tried to bait Endall into a story by telling the tale of the attack on Trollskull, omitting specifics that might indicate pure participants or our involvement in any slayings.
Endall took the bait and prepared to regal us with a tale. So Stote bought another round and launched into this… Bill to send an email.
As Endall concluded his story and passed his cover over to Name who promptly filled it. Stote was visibly shaken and became more upset as he tried to sort out what had just been revealed. He continued to dial it up and increase his volume and, as he went to turn away from the guaranteed pussay, Nadja hit the group with a calm emotion spell. Ebon, unaffected, decided to dial his participation up a notch. Endall glibly ‘splained the situmanation and then had to ‘spain it again.
Ebon, in a departure from the expected, paid for more information of Endall’s relationship with ‘Winnie’ by telling him the tale of the Cassalanters.
Endall then did indeed retort by explaining that when Winnie managed to get away from her ‘companion’ he had learned that she also had a daughter who also had ‘the curse’ and that it would not materialize until Winnie died. Upon questioning, Name was able to determine that the ‘companion’ was a large dwarf named Amergo. He was never very far away unless Winnie gave him the slip. This cost him his job, but he seems to have been able to keep his life. He’s working in the castle on Skull Island. We asked about a couple other minor items and, once it seemed that he was still wound up, Name went ahead and bought another round and told Cal ‘al to go ahead and drug Stote, which she gleefully accepted. After he was drugged and we stripped his gear, we all headed over to Endall and Cal’Al’s places. (They are neighbors)
Since they knew us better, they did share that we shouldn’t stay at the Guts and Garters and if we did, be wary of the proprietor, Quietude as he is a spy for the Xanathar.
Endall’s home was chock full of books and the history of the world and nature and particularly the fey, and the feywild. Nadja asked for some on dwarfs and actually spent the time to cast mending on any books that might have been in disrepair. They talked a bit about this and that and such and, as he settled in, Name mentioned that perhaps, one day, the TsBcnrs, could clear his name. Endall said it might be hard to do as the Cassalanters were a powerful family and had seemed to take a dislike to Endall when he tried to verify some information he found about that family. They may have even gone so far as tho actually murder someone and then pin it on Endall.
Nadja did some additional probing (no not that kind) and determined that Stote’s father was indeed a wood elf and that we hadn’t yet met Amergo. Amergo might be recognized as he had a helmet with ridiculously high horns and also a purple broach in the shape of a globe for fastening his cloak. This orb had the symbol of a sunburst on it but more was unknown to Endall.
Then we did a long rest
We did determine that Sun Death is a large half-ogre or half giant who rides a wyvern. Endall couldn’t understand why they didn’t keep ‘Winnie’ in the tower.
We determined that there are other ways to get there a long way round which may likely also be guarded.
Name did opine that, perhaps if someone were to attack the spectators from below, it could split the enemies. He mapped out a plan to use the first floor chokepoints. We’ll find out next week when we can engage Stote as well.
P.S.
Nadja has a spell to locate Winnie
Stote may be able to sneak by with his gloom stalker ability.
2022-03-19 Ebon’s strap-on
6 Flamerule We are at Endalls and have just finished a long rest.
Stote seems none the worse for the wear and he was happy with his evenings adventures.
As we were going over our near perfect plan, Bill pissed all over it by having Endall remind us of the skulls.
We did some additional discussion about the skulls and whether or not we could fool em or not. We weren’t really getting anywhere so Eb0on showered affection on the dog. Which may be a dire wolf.
We continued our plans and prepped one of the buildings, JIK. Endall took 4 of the party to another stair that led to the second level to check out options to the west. Not a lot happening there so…let’s wing it.
We regrouped, went back to the original plan of Stote disguising himself as Fabio, attacking one of the bugbears on the walkway. After a couple attempts, stote made an impression, but not sufficient to get them to charge. Instead, we heard his partner extolling him to remember his orders and to go to the commander’s to get healed.
Name followed below and sort of got a feel for where the commander’s office might be. He wound up outside of Twinbeard’s Traps where the noise from an argument inside made it difficult to hear what might be discussed above.
Stote noticed that now the crew on the third floor was doing their best to stay away from edges and sech.
Ebon, determining WWED (even) , decided to follow Name, and was able to track him quite easily.
Ebon, stopped at the intersexual and noted a sign to the south that read Sargauth’s Bounty.
Name, having waved everyone down to the ‘Traps’ and not being able to make out any other conversation.
A dwarf on the far side was speaking to a human who was obviously a soldier with a longsword and shield. The room appears to be a shop for traps with various mechanisms of metal and wood laid out around the shop.
AQ wondered if we were going to just leave Name in there alone.
Stote, having moved quite a bit, was having a better view of the second floor than the first, and continued moving about for a better vantage point.
Nadja, petting the wolf, managed to sneak some of his mangy fur and cast locate creature on Stote’s mom. SUCCESS – Winnie’s above us and to the South.
Stote decided to move up to the second level with his Leif Garrett self and began climbing up.
Thorvan Twinbeard introduced himself and discussed some of his traps and recommended the sleek ‘bear’ trap as the best course of home defense and Name, thinking better to go as a group,m bid he and his friend, Nesarine a good day (although he called his grumpy ass nectarine as he left).
The group was eager to head south to try to find Winnie but scaling was out of the question.
Endall suggested that we might be able to use .. Distillery
Stote came skidding up from behind and recanted us with his tale of nearly killing all of the bugbears (ok, just shooting one in the face). Nadja was a bit incredulous, but still let him know that she knew where his Mom was. This caused Stote to immediately have Ebon throw him up. Ebon didn’t hesitate (and no one else disagreed) so off went Stote. He landed pretty porly but with AQs help, goosing him with a mage hand, but eventually getting him in place.
Once up on the third level, stote threw down a rope and the rest climbed up. Endall, Nadja (with the bowling ball grip) , Aquilonia (in a sling seat), Ebon with his wolf lashed to his chest (after a bit of difficulty), then Name.
As the party was climbing and Ebon was lashing, the group above saw a spectator come around a corner and observe for a short amount of time. With Endall covering Stote’s rope work, it seems like the spectator saw nothing of interest.
Ebon, having successfully lashed ‘Wolfy to him’ was able to make the climb regardless of protestation from the aforementioned canid. However, as Ebon was transferring over the rail, he might have fallen, were it not for the aid of Endall and Aquilonia’s Mage Hand.
Name brought up the rear in fine style and we’re all on the crown.
Stote, no longer our happy go lucky, looked at Nadaj and simply said “Where?”. Using his gloomstalker ability he moved in that direction.
The spectator at the end of the walkway where he headed did not seem to see Stote at all as he passed.
Name checked the way Stote went (even though he didn’t know that). He saw the spectator and ducked back around the corner. Ebon checked his direction and saw nothing. After some discussion it was decided that the party would go to the west and south to see if they could then find a way east.
Stote continued on and heard a door close somewhere behind him. He observed bugbears off to his left and waited.
Nadja led the way in the new direction and moving quickly got within sight of the Overflowing Urn. (See notes from last week). The rest of us followed along behind our fleet footed dwarven maiden.
Stote saw a bugbear coming from behind but easily outpaced him as he moved forward.
Nadja kept sprinting forward and saw the way ahead was clear. She singled Ebon who followed suit and the rest of the party joined them.
Stote paid extra attention to his stealth and approached a bugbear duo at the homosection. He attacked suddenly from the shadows, gaining surprise as he seemed to appear from nowhere. Near max damage was not quite enough to kill the bugbear outright but he did get the Bugbears attention. The bugbear cried out in alarm, which was enough to summon aid, but not enough to save his life from Stote’s second attack. Stote could here the call to breing torches.
The group continued forward in their chosen path and then Bill faded…
2022-04-09 – We’re back – Ebon’s still strapping
6 Flamerule – Unknown bells. The group quickly covered baseball events then looked at the new maps with some additional description.
Starting with Stote – he swung over the rail and made his way down to the ‘ground’. Here it is and outcropping of rock that exists only on this uppermost level. The terrain was challenging, slowing his movement somewhat; He kept the shadows and continued.
The rest of the party consulted Nadja and kept moving in the direction she indicated.
Stote continued stealthily getting to a large building and heard a door open and close above him.
Name suggested we go South to go East as heading through the large boulder may expose us unexpectedly. As we crossed the intersexual, we saw a bugbear heading Sotuh parallel to us.
Stote started to see more bugbears gathering and observed them gathering a bit. He began a climb up the walls and with the new vantage point saw still more enemies about. He decided the best course of action was to ‘disguise self’ as a bugbear and see how things went. Hmm, Bill seems skeptical.
The rest of the party moved forward, slow and short. Name suggested that Endall (who indicated he was sort of a ‘distance support’ sort of fellow and Name suggested the connected roofs ahead as the perfect spot for both him and Aquilonia. Endall is assigned to protect the group and Aquilonia.
Stote could make out some of the conversation the three bugbears were having nearby and determined that they were searching. He then parquered it back up to the walkway.
The rest of the party, trying to move quietly, were foiled by Wolfie who made it difficult for Ebon to move with the needed stealth.
Stote was making his way toward the entrance of the large building counting on his disguise and confidence to carry the day.
With a bit more struggle than it should have taken, Ebon and Name managed to get the rest of the party up on the roof and ready for what will likely be the coming combat.
The bugbears learned of the Half-Orc and Wolf and also the death of Booger at the hands of an unknown assailant.
Stote, not being stopped by anyone, entered the large building and….
Ebon and Name entered the room and found two men (one a mere boy) in flagrante delicto. Both our entrance and the noises on the roof suitably ruffled one. After a bit of threatening from Ebon and some lackluster persuasion from Name, the message begane to sink in. The man seemed to get the picture and asked that we not break anything. Ebon freed Wolfie.
Aquilonia and Endall crept up to the peak of the roof to get a better view and may have been noticed by the group of bugbears. This was confirmed when one loosed a javelin at Aquilonia. It sailed high and the initiative was on.
Nadja cast bless on Name, Ebon, and herself. Aquilonia Mind Spiked one of the bugbears.
Ebon moved to the far window, where he was able to observe the group of bugbears and surmised that the group on the roof had been spotted. He called this out to Name who said, “I’m the window, you’re the door”. Ebon moved in that direction.
Stote, having entered the large building saw a lot of motherfuckers and, his mother, tied to a chair and gagged. There was also a mind flayer who spoke to Stote’s mind and said, “we were just waiting for you to arrive”. Stote attempted to stab the mind flayer, missed and swash-buckled away. He called out that there were attacks in the building. The bugbears replied that there were attacks from the west. Stote dropped from the walkway again.
Name moved to the window and shot the bugbear he could see. The first arrow simply shieb’d dem fenster’ and the second critted the bug bear to an early grave. Endall cast a spell on several of the bugbears that made them easier to hit as they were limned in an eerie light. Wolfie growled at the boy fucker who called out to control our animal.
The bugbears returned faerie fire and Endall took some damage. One of them was lashing his torch to the post.
Ebon told BF to mind his manners and asked Name if he should just hold the door. Name confirmed. BF wisely shut the fuck up.
Nadja held her attack waiting for someone to round the corner. She asked if Endall was ok and he assured her he was.
Stote then took a couple whacks at Bugbear 12 and did a good deal of damage but didn’t get the kill. Name, on the other hand, had no issues sending another bugbear to join Booger. Aquilonia couldn’t gone with what she originally wanted (because Bill, she’s not in range). So she went with Magic Missile and hit three of the bugbears. Wolfie kept BF in check.
Endall peeked over the edge of the roof and viciously mocked one of the bugbears so severly that it died. He then turned to Aquilonia and said, “I liked the way you handled yourself”, and that seemed to be sufficient to bolster her next attack.
One of the bugbears then grabbed the dead one’s torch and went after Stote with a mace…but, he missed.
Ebon simply couldn’t contain himself anymore and Name agreed that he could charge into combat and so, he did. Wolfie followed.
Stote now showed that he was completely warmed up and took out his first opponent and then moved on the bugbear number 2 (31 actually). Name, not wanting Stote to feel bad, shot the shit (life) out of him as well.
Aquilonia, peeking back over the edge to firebolt the remaining bugbear. As soon as she did, he fired his crossbow which he had been holding in wait for just such an occasion. Mostly unphased by the small amount of damage used the inspiration from Endall to turn her miss into a hit and firebolted the bugbear. Endall viciously mocked this remaining bugbear and almost killed him as well.
Just as things were looking up, the roof crew heard the flapping of winged creatures as reinforcements began to emerge from the large building.
Stote also heard the sound of a brain dog leaving his last foe. Since that sound is like the ‘The Des Moines Institute’ he was ready for the attack.
One of the remaining bugbears (ok, the only remaining bugbear) decided to flee and fled right around the corner into Ebon’s path.
Nadja, hearing the flapping of a large creature coming from the NorthWest, suggested that the roof may not be as safe as thought and moved to the southern crease made by the roofs.
Ebon, a little rusty at rolling since he had watched the door for a couple rounds, missed with his first attack, but only needed the second to make the kill. He was able to make out Stote and his braindog foe.
Stote attacked braindog and then swash-buckled around the corner greeting Ebon on the way.
Name finished off the braindog and then shifted to one of the thugs coming out of the large building to the east.
Suddenly, Name was attacked from behind by BF who missed, most likely for the last time. Name told him that, if he fled, he could live. Unfortunately, he demurred.
Aquilonia, looking over the edge of the roof again. firebolted thug 1 and left him heavily damaged. Wolfie moved towards Ebon.
Endall told Aquilonia that it sounded like Sundeath approaching on his Wyvern.
The thugs moved in not realizing they were giving Ebon exactly what he wanted, pre-death corpses.
2022-04-23_Mr Goodbar Kills Everybody (Part 1) – The Birth of Nadja Wyvern rider
As we start off with the appearance of Sundeath and his Wyvren and his cry for the bugbears to join him at his side (doesn’t he know they can’t fly)?
Nadja considered using Command, but thought better of it and went with Guiding Bolt instead. She drew first blood and then decided to get high…er on the roof.
Ebon, after reminding everyone of his big arrow, attacked Thug number 2 but, it having been two weeks, was a little rusty.
Stote swashbuckled in, stab-bed thug 1 and watched as he fell to the ground bleeding out. Wanting to have a matched set, he attacked thug 2 but failed to complete his bookends. He then swashbuckled away
Name, being a bit pissed off attacked the ass-ass-in and, failing to kills him as expected, action surged and whittled him down a bit more. He left him standing but considering the error of his ways.
Aquilonia, a bit concerned about Nadja beinfg jealous , overcame this concern and decided to focus on Sundeath and his Wyvern. She casted a fireball and, after worrying a bit about liability to the homeowner, cast just above his head getting both Sundeath and his mount. She moved overt the peak noting to Nadja that she’d be ‘cooking dinner tonight’.
Wolfie, struggling a bit to move over the planks got closer to the closest thugs.
A braindog came out of thug 1 and headed after Stote. He used his ability to do some psychic damage to Stote. He did, but then Stote was inspired to shake it off, shake it off.
Thug 2 went for Wolfie and while bieng unlucky in combat, got really lucky in pissing off Ebon.
Endall, secure in his sexuality, once again cast Fairie Fire (not that there’s anyything wrong with that).
The ass-ass-in did a little damage to Name but failed to poison him to death, should have surrendered.
Sundeath decided to attack Aquilonia cuz he’s a pussy and did some pretty hefty damage to her booby. He attacked her again and did even more. Wanting a closer look, he flew over and dropped down onto the roof which miraculously held as did Endall’s sphincter.
The Wyvern attacked Endall and, while doing damage, Endall made his saves and kept going.
Nadja then touched Aquilonia’s boob (not to heal, but just for luck) and leapt for the Wyvern. She made an awesome leap and managed to get a grip and hold on.
Ebon had been flashing his best smile at thug 2 but that quickly faded when T2 attacked wolfie. Now, it was time for something to die. Yep, seems like it was thug #2. But that was just the appetizer. You attack my dog,I attack your braindog. He heaped some damage on the little feller.
Stote stopped in and finished the job at hand.
Name finished off the assassin with flaming grace. He then turned to the window to see what he could see and saw a bugbear and Ebon.
Aquilonia decided to use a healing potion and then moved to get off the roof. She managed to make it down with just a minor scrape.
Endall tried to ruin Sundeath’s day with some spell but didn’t get a very noticable result.
Wolfie moved forward to Ebon.
Sundeath decided to focus on Endall and end all of him. He then moved across the roof towards Stote. He saw wolfie and made stupid cute noises.
The Wyvern, trying to get Nadja off (no not that way) started doing some amnouvering and got her with a piece of tail. She took some massive-ish damage and Nadja dicided that the Wyvern might be better of like Ray Charles and so she cast blindness and took out its sight.
Ebon, finally looking in SunDeath’s direction, heard voices in his head urging/demanding that he attack. It appeared the vboice was coming from his axe and, rather than argue, he decided to attack Sundeath. He pounded on him to some good effect but failed a ruleslawyer check and did the damage expected. He did turn to Aquilonia and, with an uncharacteristic snarl, told her to “run”.
Stote also attacked Sundeth and did a bit more damage. As he moved away he called out about attackes from afar and archers as well.
Name, not seeing any opponents through the window, Name swittched back to his bow and moved back outside. Seeing the Wyvern, he immediately attacked and, fortunately, did not hit Nadja.
Aquilonia moved toward Wolfie and tried to pry it away from Ebon but Wolfie was not to be swayed. Instead, Wolfie stayed near Ebon and watched the area. While our Endall gently bleeds.
Sundeth thought he would return Ebon’s attacks and jumped down to do just that. However, that migh not have been the wisest choice as the walkway gave away and both he and Ebon fell to the ground below.
The Wyvern, not knowing what the fuck was going on, simply went with the one thing it could think of which was to fly straight up. When it hit the ceiling, Nadja was able to avoid some of the impact but still took damage.
The bugbears that had heard the call continued to close in.
Nadja, apparently not understanding the gravity (literally) of her situation, decided to cast a levelled cause wounds spell. She did some substnatial damage but (fortunately?) did not kill it outright.
Ebon being prone after the fall, stood up and continued his onslaught of Sundeth. doing really good damage. Sundeth started looking a bit worse for the wear.
Suddenly, Bill recalled the giant sized crewature damage and Sundeth, having no rules lawyer of his very own, ended up taking even more damage.
Stote moved back off the walkway and spiderman’d his way along the bottom of the deck while he and Joe ranted about our groups cool-ness factor and then detemined, with some suprise, that Sundeth was still alive.
Name, determining that Nadja was on the Wyvern, decided to annihalte one of the charging bugbears.
Aquilonia, trapped between a rock (SD and a hardplace (Spectator) took her meta advice and went after Sundeth with a cantrip. Just when it seemed that her damage would be puny, she was inspired to improve it a bit and rerolled.
Wolfie jumped down on to Sundeth and gnawed on him a bit but took a bit of damage from the landing.
Still our Endall gently bleeds
The bugbears piled on down the boardwalk and perfromed a variety of attacks against Aquilonia and doing somewhat poorly.
Nadja, still on the back of the Wyvern, and having just secured herself, cast spiritual weapon and managed to kill the Wyvern…ooops, what does that fall look like, pretty good as the Wyvern took the brunt of the damage. This debacle left a giant dwarven schlong hanging high above the combat.
Ebon decrapitatyed Sundeth and then, to add injury to death attacked the corpse. He checked on Wolfie and, ascertaining that his new pet was okay, began to think of other things to kill.
One of the bugbears said something about havong a bad day and Aquilonia glibbly added that it was about to get worse.
Stote moved up on toe the walkway and started taking the bugbear pack apart from the rear.
Name climbed the building to asses the situation and aw the crumpled form of Endall. He moved to check him out (after ascertaining the spectator did not seem to be engaging) and planned to render aid.
Aquilonia, not being a fan of crowds that are heavily armed, misty stepped to safety.
Wolfie, being somewhat scared and a bit injured, ran for the closest friendly face on his level which turned out to be Nadja.
Endall continued bleeding.
The spectator nearest the main group shot a black ray at Aquilonia and did some rotting damage. Another ray struck Ebon, but seemedc to have no effect.
The filthy cheating bugbears attacked Ebon as he was climbing back up from Sundeth’s grave. They did a little damage, but not enough to slow him down.
Nadja Wyvernclimber helped Wolfie up on to the corpse and then made the leap back up to the walkway with a nimbleness belying her race.
Ebon, as noted above unphased by the minor attacks of the bugbears, regained his footing on the walkway and set his eyes on the spectator who had beamed him. This was incredibly unfortunate for the bugbear between him and his intended target. (ok, somewhat unfortunate),
Since he didn’t kill it, he moved around it and leapt upon the spectator and missed completely. Fortunately, he had more inspiration than Name who had gallantly spent his on a gamin extention, and turned that miss around. However, he failed to stick the landing and took a bit of damage on the way down.
Stote called out to Aquilonia to “Kill the floaty brain” and then attacked a bugbear? Well, he killed it and so that turned out okay. He continued hacking away at another bugbear.
Name whipped out his staff and threw a healing on Endall, adding pretty shitty points back. (he didn’t have any inspiration left to fix it either.
Aquilonia dinged the spectator witha firebolt and made sure that Stote knew she had hit.
Wolfie followed Nadja cuz there was nothing much else to do.
Endall, now back on his feet, wasted no time thanking Name, but instead gave himself a bot more healing and was really starting to look pretty good.
And that’s all that three inspiration buys you these days, dammit!
2022-04-30 Mr Goodbar Kills Everybody (Part 2)
It is still six Flamerule (we think) although we have no idea how many bells
We start out with the Spectator renewing his attacks on Aquilonia and hitting her with the black ray again. This time it was too much for her and she toppled off the walkway and fell another 12-ish feet to her death save.
He then turned his attention to Name (cuz he was higher up than I thought) and shot him with a multi-colored ray that made him feel a brief moment of forgetfulness, but Name’s prevagen kicked in and he recovered.
Spectator 2 pissed a beam away on Ebon who’s rage made him immune to fear. The second ray however confused Ebon (which is arguably his natural state). We’ll see how this plays out.
The bugbears went and were nigh unstoppable as they rolled well against both Stote and Ebon. Fortunately, they missed Nadja.
Nadja tried to bring the Spiritual penis back into the combat but it moves pretty slowly. She didn’t spending both her action and move action on trying to get to where it mattered
Ebon, being a bit confused, attacked one of the bugbears who had been stupid enough to get on to his level. He hacked him up pretty good and then made his save to come out of confusion.
Stote, neck deep in bugbears cunningly acted to move away from them and then pulled a Simone Biles over the railing and grabbed Aquilonia and hit her with a House without the wait time (max heal).
Name took advantage of the definite article and he moved his Hunter’s Mark to the Spectator 1 (‘a’ subsequent turn). He then shot him not once, but twice with his mighty bow of killing stuff. Satisfied with the damage he ducked out of sight and called out loudly, “Ready your bows men, he’ll be coming into sight any moment.”
Aquilonia got up and got her bearings and unfortuantely for the bugbear, he was the only thing within her bearings. She put him in his grave with a firebolt. She then stepped daintily, no wait, mistily onto the walkway above.
Endall, feeling a bit better now than most of last week, spoke in a strange tounge and gave the spectator some of his own medicine, shooting him with an eldritch bolt from his forehead. The spectator went down like a deflating balloon. Endall then ran to the edge of the roof but quickly reconsidered jumping down as that was where Ebon and SunDeath went to ground.
We’re back to Spectator 2 who decided to go after….Ebon. He tried the same ray and Ebon was once again (still?) confused. His second ray went for Endall and failed to effect him.
The bugbear gang got to the walkway intersexual, homosection, intersection and decided it’s better to attack what they can see (Aquilonia) The first one charged over and put her down with his first attack. The next one proved that bugbears are truly inept at javelining and he missed Endall.
Nadja kept the penis moving toward the main group and then missed one of the bugbears with a crossbow.
Ebon, confused about whom to attack, WWEDx3’d Stote (as a bugbear) with a couple of javelins. He stayed confused and didn’t get the crushing depression of having attacked his besty.
Stote, cursing Ebon for his javelin skills, thought about once again moving back up on to the walkway but then set his sights on the large building’s roof. He immediately lay prone and drank a healing potion.
Name, moved up to the peak of the roof and, after a quick assessment of the situation, moved his hunters mark to the remaining spectator and hit him twice.
Wolfie came up to where Nadja was and looked for snacks.
Endall cast healing word and Aquilonia was good again and Stote and Endall got a bit of a lift as well.
The spectator, deciding discretion is the better part of death, fled into the distance.
The bugbears, not having the sense god gave a bugbear, stayed on to attack. One of them hit Endall with a Javelin. Another, feeling lucky at seeing Endall get hit, followed suit and hit Endall as well. One extra shitty one went over to strike a killing blow on Aquilonia, but sufficient rules lawyering made him miss. He was able to recover enough to get her over the edge. The last one went for Endall and got him with a little bit of damage.
Nadja tried to Toll the Dead on BB#8 but he saved. She forgot the penis, but I talked Bill into letting her recover. A couple seconds later she got her spiritual weapon in range and smacked BB#25 for some damage and disgust.
Ebon, still confused, could only see the two bugbears hovering over Aquilonia and so they’re on the list. His first attack missed, but the second struck home. But not a kill.
Stote, unaware that the spectator had fled, used his long bow to attack one of the bugbears attacking Aquilonia. That one exploded and so Stote ducked back down.
Name came over the peak of the roof and, being unable to see spectator 2, ended Bugbear 29. He then took the next one closest to her and gave him some damage as well. He moved back to his crouched position.
Aquilonia made her death safe (good choice Bill).
Wolfie ran over and whined as the gap was to large.
Endall, not having a kewl telekinesis or something like that, once again mumbled something in an eldritch tongue which caused a spiritual tree to spring up and shower Aquilonia with healing and chime noises.
Back to the top of the order:
Spectator 2 continued to flee.
The three remaining bugbears showing way more common sense of the 8th, 9th, and 10th guys in a kung-fu movie, and ran. One went to the door of the lage building and tried to get in but the door was barred, He was yelling, “they’re coming, they’re coming, we’re being overrun!
Nadja moved her spiritual weapon forward (having recently missed on her attack of opportunity with it) and, after throwing Wolfie a snack, decided, since she’s trapped here, to move back and check the door of the building behind her. The door was solid and locked.
Ebon, still confused, could only see one bugbear and decided to javelin the shit out of him, which he did. He then completed his round by coming out of confusion.
Stote, jumped down, stabbed around, killed another bugbear. Jumped down, stabbed around, kill a foe a round. Not liking the song to end there he moved forward and attacked one of the other fleeing bugbears.
Name, coming back over the peak of the roof, targeted the last remaining bugbear and killded him before he could get away.
As we left initiative, I had to go put my dad away and a bunch of cool stuff happened while I was gone. Low and behold, we were all on the ‘right’ side of the boardwalk and the group was discussing healing spirit.
Aquilonia had cast web and used it to make a bridge that Nadja could cross. Name, Wolfie, and Endall were also able to cross.
The spirit had healed Aquilonia twice and now Stote once. Only one more heal left sing the spirit is nerfed. Aquilonia got the last one but we’re still hurtin’.
Name used the healing staff to cast mass cure wounds on the group but got a shitty roll until he was inspired to improve the result.
While Stote wanted to rush right in, Name counselled and attack plan that, while poor, was better than nothing, so in we went…
Ebon took a moment to think of something ‘rageous’ and then after a quick bless from Nadja, Name and Ebon cast disintegrate on the door and stepped into the room using the remainder of their movement to close with the mind flayer and Stote’s Mom. Name called out “Aquilonia, on us”.
Aquilonia, after a few management challenges, targeted the right foes and devastated to room with a damaging fireball.
Endall, went with his favorite, Fairie Fire, getting the enemies that mattered.
Nadja, able to see everyone from where she was (thanks Bill) cast spirit guardians and moved into the room behind Name.
Wolfie charged in, but waited to unravel “What Daddy is Doing”.
Stote entered and killed the first thug he encountered. He moved forward to attack again and, just when it seemed he missed, his mom must have inspired him, to crit. Some debate ensued about favored foe but Bill rules that it was once per turn. Stote instead did some ‘standard’ damage to the mind flayer.
….and then it was time to wait until next session.
2022-05-07 And then there were none
Still 6 Flamerule – cuz time has stopped –
It has dawned upon us that there is molten something or other on the ceiling above us.
Stote’s mom continues to shake her head which seems to give us a better view of her bondage gear. A metal and leather gag, secured behind her head and bindings going all the way up her arms and legs holding her to the chair.
Stote decided death is one of the other parts of valor and attacked the mind flayer. He got a crit and killed it dead. However, the MF’s erection did not seem reduced at all.
Aquilonia also got a crit with a fire bolt which heavily damaged thug # 6
Stote’s mom continued murmuring
Name called to Ebon to grab the chair and run and then ran to do the same. After a significant number of machinations and some bitching, we managed to get moving in the proper direction. We got her to the door.
There was a popping noise from the area of Thug3.
Turns out is was the mind flayer in hiding. Of course he cast psychic blast and of course everyone failed to save except Nadja and Stote.
Nadja immediately reacted by slapping some sense inot Ebon and, believe it or not, it worked.
Wolfie, somehow surviving the blast, charged across the room and attacked thug #6, but missed.
Thug #3 retaliated against Woflie and heavily damaged him.
Thug 54 attacked Ebon who paritally resisted the damage.
Thug 5 went after Nadja but missed as did Thug 6 against Stote.
Thug 7 held his ground and thug 8 hit Nadja a glancing blow.
Endall remained stunned.
Stote kilded thug 6 and then went after captain tentacles.
Aquilonia hung out for her whole term but then saved.
Name stayed very still and then DID NOT save as well.
Suddenly we all heard (in our heads)…”Leave the kept, and you may live.” After that, Nadja and Ebon were confused.
Nadja began to disrobe but then made her save and snapped out of it.
Wolfie sunk his teeth into thug 3 and did a bit of damage.
Ebon did nothing – but save baby!
Thug 3 attacked Wolfie and elicited a yelp of pain.
Thug 4 tried to crossbow Ebon, but missed as di the rest of the thugs.
Endall, comfortable standing on one spot, remained stunned.
Stote went back to stabbing at the Mind Flayer, but it seemed to be doing little damage.
Aquilonia, now knowing where the mind flayer was, cast fireball excluding all of her friends from the blast and kicked ass.
Name, having not saved last time, decided it was time to do so.
Thug 2 joined the fray and came down and attacked Ebon. He did a little damage.
Dickneck, the mind flayer, said to our minds “your mother is dying and will be dead soon. If you leave this room now, she will be spared”. Then he went after Ebon, poiting at him and apparently fingering the hell out of him. Even after Ebon felt inspired, he felt the finger more.
Nadja cast healing word on Stote’s mom (Cuz the mind flayer had got in her head.) But that was just bonus. She then told his death (ok, tolled the dead) and did a bit of damage.
Bahgtru (nee Wolfie) ran from the room and started licking Endall’s hand. Whether to reviving or as an appetizer was unclear.
Ebon, heading Stote’s words, grabbed Mrs Stote and ran out of the room.
A bunch of braindogs popped out and moved about the room.
Stote disengaged and moved out of the room counselling Nadja to do the same.
Aquilonia moved forward and cast haste on Name and told him to kill the MF. This resulted in a lot of work
Stote’s mom mumbled some more.
Name attacked 3 times and did meh damage. Then he misty stepped to the corner.
Nadja made it out the door and used divine power get back a spell slot.
Endall continued to fail his saving throws.
Ebon moved Stote’s mom off the boardwalk to the ground below.
Thug 4 and 7 surrounded Tiras and Thug 4 hit and did some damage and Thug 7 missed. A mental attack came in and did some more damage.
One of the braindogs attacked Endall and managed to kill him.
Another attacked Nadja and stunned her.
Stote attempted to get Nadja down on him but failed instead went down on himself gracefully.
Aquilonia (after a dice roll to determine WWAD) blew her last fireball into the room and hopefully did enough.
Stote’s Mom, arms finally unbound, was working on her gag.
Name Killed Thug 4, then Thug 7 , then broke away to attack dickhead, but his attack bounced of an invisible wall. He took an attack of pooprtunity to get there. Fiunidng his attack ineffective, he turned his attentions to the braindog and missed.
The braindog and remaining thug (2) missed Nadja even though she was stunned.
Dickhead formed some beams of light and shot them all at Name. They hit but did little damage.
Nadja made her save and was ready for action.
Bahgtru looked up at Ebon as if to say, “did I do good?”.
Ebon, realizing he was calmer now (his rage was gone), decided he might do something with Stote’s mom in the ball gag. He saw the mechanism wasn’t that complex, which is perfect as neither is he. He decided to grab the block of wood and crushed it. Stote’s mom gasped out a quick thank you.
Intellect Devourer 1 performed a psychic attack on Name and, of course, everything went his way so Name took heavy damage and was stunned.
Intellect devourer 2 did something with Endall.
Stote shot and killed Thug # 2
Aquilonia moved down the walkway and cast Chromatic Orb on Intellect devourer 1 and killed it and saved the day.
Stote’s mom informed the group down below that her love (and Stote’s father by the way) was the ‘fake’ Mind Flayer above.
Just as all of this was sinking in, we ended for the evening to Bohemian Rhapsody
Will Name Survive?
Did Stote strike the deathblow on his own father?
We’ll find out next time, on SOAP.
2022-05-28 What will become of …..
Once again 6 Flamerule, unknown bells (however Name knows it’s actually 7 Flamerule)
Stote’s mom has quickly overcome her grief at the loss of ‘Lumpy’ (Stote’s father) {Now actually Lumpy} with the restoration of her son.
She offered to mind meld with Stote but he demurred.
Name stuttered F-f-f-f-u-u-u-u-ck Y-y-y-y-y-ou and failed. However, he was inspired by his mix of hatred and fear of the mind flayer inspired Name to save.
The mind flayer moved through the room with stunning speed and stopped just outside the big building. He immediately dominated Nadja who…
Nadja, in very convincing tones, explained to the group that the risk to Stote’s mom was too great and we should probably leave her in the (so far) reasonable care of the mind flayer.
Bahgru moved over to Stote’s mom and stood on his hind legs like a defender.
Ebon dropped a couple of javelins and a wand and jumped up to the walkway to take a stab at the mind flayer. Stab he did, although it was more of a chop and then another chop. Apparently the mind flayer didn’t like that at all and so, with a glare of hatred towards Ebon, he disappeared.
The braindog next to Ebon continued its attempts to feast on Endall’s brain. Yeah – Endall won again.
Stote called up for body removal services from Name and then moved whatever distance Bill allowed. He then attacked the braindog to death.
Aquilonia quaffed a healing potion and got a bit of a boost.
Name ran forward to the North door and, throwing it open, saw more thugs charging in. He quickly shot one of the thugs, and then misty-stepped back into the room.
Nadja, coming out of domination, Nadja had no idea what was going on. She could not ascertain Endall’s health from a glance but after observing him for a round, she was able to determine that Endall had passed. She cast revify on Endall and he spent his one hit point telling her we had to stop meeting like this.
Bahgtru was getting some scratched from Ylluehwyvar.
Ebon, being a bit slow, pulled Nadja off Endall (wasting the revify) {So disregard the above} and dragged her over to Stote’s mom.
Stote, seeing that his dad might make it, ran back to his mom to assure her that Lumpy was being worked on.
Aquilonia, having heard Name’s warning, moved back inot the room. She readied her Magic Missile for the first enemy to come through the door.
Xanathar thug 1 was the winner and ran in the room to his death.
Thug 2, having more balls than brain came prancing in as well followed by the rest of the group. He fired his heavy crossbow at Ebon. he missed.
Thug 3 followed suit and, while he did hit, the bolt effectively just bounced off.
Thug 4, a bit wiser, shot Nadja and hit for a bit of damage.
Name shot another of the inbound thugs and damaged him heavily.
Nadja cast revify on Lumpy
Bahgtru continued to protect Ylluehwyvar and get scratchies
Thug I (what the fuck does that mean) moved in on Nadja ***Then there was an intense debate about the flow of actions in a round*** after all that, Thug I missed Nadja, twice.
Ebon squared off on Thug I and chopped him once and did some good damage, but somewhat unsatisfied, critted him to death.
Stote, after assuring Ylluehwyvar that lumpy was fine, moved back into the room and kill-stole thug 4 with a shot of his wad, er bow.
Aquilonia also shot her fire bolt but missed the mark by a mile.
Ylluehwyvar kept giving scratchies and praise to Bahgtru who might be of some benefit in the combat, but…no.
The thugs fled
Name, remembering that dawn had come and gone, used the staff of healing to mass heal the group.
We heard the braindog pop and a braindog came out and tried to decide who to attack. Joe’s even roll decided that Luminorthin was the better target, but boy was he wrong.
Nadja moved out and revified Endall.
Ebon went to the bathroom and so was a bit delayed in his action which, by another even roll, was to free ‘Lumpy’.
Endall jumped in a time machine and finally told Nadja “we have to stop meeting like this”. He then moved into the room and cast mass healing word for a little repair across the board.
Stote moved in on the braindog and wounded him and then attacked again to stack the damage up. and then went to pull a Steve L (yell at his dad for doin’ stupid shit’).
Aquilonia finished of the brain dog and it was time to make like a shepherd and get the flock out of here.
Name moved back towards the assassin building and urged everyone else to follow.
Ebon, being the helpful half-orc that he is, started moving Lumpy in the proper direction, but kept him out in front. His goal was to get Lumpy to Ylluehwyvar (Eel-win-we-var).
Aquilonia followed close behind and closed the door as she left since she was the last one out.
Ebon, wanting to verify that Lumpy was indeed Lumpy, he was able to determine it to his satisfaction.
Stote had the good sense to jam a piton into the door before we left.
Just as Ebon lowered him over the edge, it was my dad’s bedtime.
Returning, just as expected, it was determined that AStots and all of the wierdly named people were all off of the walkway…none of that mattered as we eventuially made it back to Endall’s hide-out where Stote was confronted with the difficult choice of sleeping with the barmaid or hanging with his folks. Thinking with his dick, Stote went of for what he said would be 45 minutes. 7 minutes later we were all together again and ready for the explanations
“Years ago, when Stote was a child, a member of the Xanathar guild came to her and gave her the choice of watching her family (as well as herself) die or leaving them safely where they will be fine and ‘looked after’. The also indicated that her’gift’ would be passed on to her daughter (whom she didn’t know her whereabouts.
This seemed to be the straw and Ylluehwyvar, not having know her own mother knew that the enchantments placed upon ‘the seven’ could take a heavy toll of madness, misfortunes, and generally bad luck. It may even be that one of the 7 changed into Terganus, the huge red dragon who started this whole thing off. A group of heros were able to slay this red dragon which finished when vanquished but since then, the seven have been the 6. Even though the 6 survived, there were still a host of baddies both on the material and other planes looking for them so the Ullythmani (the elven protectors) decided to shield the children from harm. Whenever one of the 6 would become pregnant (by immaculate conception), a plan would go into action to snatch away their female children
At this point we’ll have to go to the recording. There’s a bunch of detail there.
Endall may have a way for us to get back out – we’ll find out in a couple weeks…
Getting Mom Home – 06/11/22 – 07/02/22 – 4c
2022-06-11 Get Out…of Skullport
Well, I missed a bunch since Jim had to go to the airport and nobody gave a fuck about Marla having the Covid.
We found out that Endall had been trying to dissuade, double cross, flim-flam us into some sort of trap. Appears he had been set-up back in Waterdeep by someone of considerable power. He had been working as a historian for the noble houses of that city, collecting records and embelishing them as ‘necessary’ when he was arrested, brought to court, charged with murder and ensorceled to not be able to tell the truth about the situation. The court, that you would think would have picked up on this, instead seemed to shift the questioning in such a way that Endall incriminated himself. While he was able to flee, he has been wishing to return and when someone offered him the opportunity, he took it. While he was telling us this, he did seem sincerely sorry and offered to introduce us to someone who could teleport us out of here. We instead demurred, bound him, Nadja cast feign death on him and we booked up.
Stote’s mom grabbed her head and asked Nadja to cast a remove curse. Nadja wasn’t too sure, but after Aquilonia advised her of the power of geas spells, the remove curse was cast and all was right with the world. Stote gave his father a silvered long sword and we were off.
A short bit of travel in the direction we wanted to go and we heard metal on metal banging and looked north to see dwarves. Durgar to be precise.
The first one we saw directly was an odd fellow who had repaird a deformed arm by bolting on a guantlet inb the form a a fist. A fist which held a massive hammer. His last words were “we had heard you were headed this way, we don’t want you leavin just yet”. Then it was initiative.
Stote, acting first and therefore knowing what he was doing, sneak attacked the mutherfuckerand killded fisty.
Ebon, charging ahead saw another opponent and showed him the meaning of oppose. 1 time told him the error of his ways and the second hit made sure he had no more ways to error.
Bahgtru, who had been lopinhg behind, ran after Ebon and stopped near him.
Nadja headed forward and glanced down at the deceased grey dwarf and wondered if he had anything of value. She took his shield and offered it to Lumpy.
Duregar #3 grew substantially and hit Ebon for some small damage. This caused Ebon to laugh.
Duregar#4 grew and unsuccessfully threw a javelin at Ebon. Bigger is not better however and he missed.
Duregar # 5 appeared near Aquilonia and took a swing, but BINBA & and 8 appeared to be luckiewr and hit her for some damage.
Duregar #6 appeared near Nadja and hit.
Aquilonia Firebolted and then misty stepped away.
Name moved forward and used his first two attacks to reduce their numbers by one (7). He then action surged and reduced the count further (5). He capped it off by threatening the remaining Duregar (8).
Mrs. Stote moved forward and attacked 8 who was moved back.
Lumpy came up and critted and then hit 8 as he flew away and did some damage.
Stote was on the phone so we skipped him.
Bahgtru – nope gotta go make dinner for Donna and absob all the shit from the group while I do it. Durgar have reach. Lumpy went down.
Aquilonia attacked and the gods themselves said nice work.
Name washed spaghetti sauce out of his eye but still couldn’t see well enough to hit.
Lumpy chumbawumba’d that shit and got back up again and then killed Durgar #8.
Ok- still makin dinner…We killed them all. Then we searched them all and, other than their mundane gear, we found only 45 silver.
The Duregar’s plan of delaying us worked, we were held up for a few minutes and then on our merry way to the cave system.
Name whipped out his ….map and Stote reminded everyone to put their sashes back on.
We tried our best to recall the path through the shrieker area but failed.
The hobgoblins recognized us immediately and, while somewhat welcoming, they were a bit upset once they found that we didn’t have the dagger.
With the shriekers continuing their noise, Name and Stote discussed the merits of killing everything in front of us vs. everything behind us.
Nadja then silenced the room.
Based on the adage Destruction is the better part of valor we made quick work of the two hobgoblin guards and Stote assumed one of their appearances.
As we prepared to move through their camp, Bill played the closing tunes.
2022-06-18 Indiana Jones-athon….and the escape from Skullport
We kicked off with Bill reminding us of our past. Esvella’s brother having been killed by duregar that may or may not have knowledge of the dagger of seeing fir the bugbears who were being tricked by the mind flayer and infiltrated by brain dogs.
We met some hobgoblins in the hall and they asked if we were ready to see the queen. Stote gave them some flimsy excuse about preparing and we were off.
We heard one of the guards indicating that they should go check on the 2 we had ‘in the bag’. We kept going in fine style taking a shot in the dark.
Name thought Stote would choose correctly, but he chose poorly. Name whispered to correct him. Aquilonia cleared her 4040 wounds (a minor heal spell) and we got back to moving.
We made our way through hob-town and at some point the hobgoblins wanted to be out in front. Name thought that was a good reversed idea and went to the back.
Turns out that the hobgoblins were good leaders and we zipped right along.
We got to a final room that was chock full of hobgoblins (11). One well armored fellow introduced himself as Kliyuse the Skullcleaver and, as a loyal servant of the queen, promised the service of his blade.
After a bit of conversation about the risks and sech, we promised to help, gave some beer, said ‘C’mon’ and left them fans of Nadja (she gave them the beer).
We were able to find a shorter route back to the river where Nadja cast a water walking-spell that allowed us to Eddie Money it back to the place where Name had entered originally.
Deciding that we didn’t want to heed this message “If Skullport’s where ye wish to be, With the Sargauth’s flow go ye .If pirate booty is what ye crave, Fight the surge to the captain’s grave.” we went the stupid Skullport way cuz of Stote and his mom.
As expected, we encountered the crazed Drider who, upon earnest questioning from Ebon (wwed) screamed at him and cast faerie fire on Stote.
Everyone else moved forward quite a ways to join the combat and things proceeded as expected after Ebon asked his question again. Fire bolts, Toll of the Dead (attempts), Stote’s mom spells and sech. It took a bit, but by the time Name hit with an arrow, it was enough to kill it.
With Stote desperate to find out what happened at Trollskull, we continued forward through the web strewn halls.
As Stote went to investigate the sounds of rough sex, we played the outro music.
Battle next week.
2022-06-25 Let’s play Mistresses and Servants
Stote has entered the outer reaches of the porn den cushy furnishings and disturbing pentagrams were the setting for some drow females and males doing the underdark nasty (Thanks Sam).
Stote, realizing he had a chance to sneak away and report back, so he did. He relayed what he had seen (and heard) to the group and Name reminded them this is similar to what he saw on the way through.
We planned very well and then Bill tried to fool us with a fake ‘Leroy Jenkins’ (Steve, look it up)
WWED didn’t change our approach and we proceeded. Then, wonder of wonder, Nadja made her stealth check aned got the spell off.
Then it was initiative aned Nadja felt the stirrings of something and managed to save.
Name moved up into range and killed one of them and wounded another.
The drow began to react and get themselves together. One managed to get herself together enough to grab a short sword, cross the room, and take a stab at Name…she missed.
Name called out to get in a clear the room.
Stote moved in and killed the shit out of the drow near Name and kept going into the room. He flicked a booger (oops, I mean dagger) at the Halle Berry looking drow chick and did her a bit of damage.
Mr. Silverfrond (Lumpy) came up from the rear and didn’t make it far enough to engage.
Aquilonia firebolted one to death.
Nadja came in with Toll the dead and finished things off.
Ebon moved through the room and , believe it or not, followed the plan. He moved up to the upper left door and opened it revealing a table with a pristing silk cloth (and Dexter music). Not one for doilies he moved on to the next door and opened that as well.
Name moved up into the room to direct the party through.
One of the other doors opened and a drow female entered looking distraught. She retreated, closing the door behind her. Same thing happened on the other side of the room.
Stote moved into an area and found a set of drow M&F. He kiled the male quickly and yelled out to Name, forgetting that Name was in a silence spell. He attacked the female and wounded her.
Lumpy took a couple of shots at the drow, but missed.
Aquilonia entered the room and seeing Name signaling to leave via the door and so she did.
Nadja moved to the door and got ready to cleave (no, not leave, CLEAVE)
Ebon continued down the hall with Bahgtru close behind.
Stote’s mom moved through the room.
Name moved down and, seeing what was going on in the Stote room, saw the female drow and killed her with a quick arrow.
Stoe gave a quick scan of the room for valuables and instead saw a bunch of porn toys (SexWheel etc) and some weapons and armor. He grabbed them and ran out of the room like Winona Ryder fleeing Nordstroms.
Lumpy kept moving forward at quite a pace.
Nadja threw open the door and found two more drow in a protective pose. Suddenly, things went dark. Nadja dispelled and they were light again.
Everyone else continued on
Name entered the room to the southwest and dispatched the male drow and attacked the female who survived a staggering amount of damage.
The female fought back and did a bit of damage to Name.
Stote came back to help out but was tripped up by the penis. He was able to recover and come in to attack the drow. He missed as she deftly parried.
The group to the north encountered…something and Aquilonia saw them first.
Nadja moved into the room and attacked the female as well, just when it seemed like she would miss, she was inspired to hit.
Ebon attacked the beings they had encountered and started killing the shit out of them.
Name tried to finish off the drow and missed twice, but was inspired to turn that frown upside down and dialed up the damage a bit higher.
The beings to the north began retaliating against Ebon and did a little damage.
Sylkress gave Name a little salute and attacked again doing some additional damage and it seemed like she might be using some poison. At least it didn’t stain.
Stote yelled something out that Name couldn’t hear and managed to give her the death blow. He made a quick act of stipping her goods and handed them to Name and off he went. He dodged the animated penis and kept going.
Lumpy moved far enough to engage with his bow and leneded aid to Ebon by killing one of the creatures.
Aquilonia fire bolted one of the creatures.
Nadja healed up Tiras and headed north.
Ebon continued killing stuff to the north starting with whatever was closest to Stote’s mom. He got 2.
Bahgtru, wanting to help out bit one to death.
Stote’s mom, apparently into mayhem, looked around approvingly.
Ebon moved towards some cells to the west of the room.
Stote, not having to worry about tripping over penises, managed to triple move up to the room in the north.
Nadja moved at a pace, slowing only to grab the silken table covering and rub it on her face.
Ebon, getting to the cells, looked in and saw a creature curled in the corner of a 5×5 room pleading for mercy. He kicked in the door and discovered a half-elf wearing chaps. They offered to free him and he begged to be unlocked both from the wall and his chastity cage, and indicated that Tarissa had the keys.
Aquilonia, not knowing Tarissa, used her thieves’ tools to fondle Geldax Brer out of his bindings. Geldar used to be a stablehand for ???
Other prisoners began to stir now hearing the commotion nearby.
The party went on to the cells while Name and Stote went through our booty. Nadja offered up her new table cover to Geldar but got a hand crossbow out of the deal.
Ebon looked inot the next cell and saw a goblin who was way more inquisitive than he should have been so Ebon left him behind. The next cell had something on the floor he couldn’t recognize and when he called out to Geldar “are there any other good people in these cells”, Lurash (in the next cell) answered explaining that there were drow in the other cells and himself a warlord of the Azrok clan (the guy who sent us on the knife quest). He indicated that the remaining cells were populated by drow. Ebon freed him and Stote gave him a javelin and told him how to get back to his tribe. He departed quickly.
Not being phased by this information, Ebon went to check on the next cell and the drow inside shot him in the eye.
Well, now ‘ he’s raging ‘, and he kicked the door in.
T’was initiative time.
The drow went first and missed Ebon badly.
Everyone generally waited for Ebon to kick ass and Name moved to guard the northern doors.
Lumpy noticed one of them was barred from the outside.
After Ebon killed the shit out of the drow in the cell, the party got back together and were about to move north when Geldar advised that the prisoner behind the barred door.
While Stote had previously seemed to be in a hurry to get out, it was he that unbarred the door revealing Mata Moonshadow who immediately introduced herself and asked for a weapon to ‘help’ fight our way out.
Stote and Name were suspicious, but once she spoke to Nadja in perfect dwarvish, nadja melted and gave her a scimitar. Then , the party decided to see what their insight told them.
Stote opened the door to the north and saw 4 troglodytes mining veins of gold. As soon as they saw Stote, they fled to a room to the west.
A giant spider clinging to the ceiling above, did not flee.
Stote was able to get a good view of the door they had fled through. It had a bas relief of a mountain with a fist sized depression in the middle. They closed the door behind them.
We re-rolled initiative and Name greatly improved his standing. He shot down the giant spider and moved north through the room to guard the door.
No guarding needed as the door flew open and revealed 4 Quaggoth.
Ebon, moving up from the back of the pack moved into the room and once again…he’s raging!
Stote entered the room as well and pulled up short as he saw another opponent. The new foe, a drow mage, tried to bop him with a staff but missed. Stote attacked twice and did some solid damage to Q4.
Nadja glanced about for the sun elf and could have hung back near Aquilonia, but instead went to check the door to the west. She tolled the shit out of Q4 and really dealt out the damage.
Q1 attacked Stote and missed.
Q2 moved around the room and attacked Stote and was a bit more successful.
Q3 attacked Ebon and hit for a bit of damage.
Q4, attacking with advantage, (and how Name knew that I don’t know) but after some difficulty, the miss became a hit, then a not, then a reroll and finally…a miss.
Aquilonia moved up and entered the room to the north. Mostly to make Nadja comfortable.
The Drow Mage pushed out a gaseous cloud of death which spread out to encompass the party including Name, Aquilonia, Bahgtru, Ebon, and Stote.
Lumpy moved up to save Aquilonia and breathed in a bit of death as well.
Marta came out and asked what she could do to help.
Stote’s mom did something and we all felt something and heard Marta scream in agony.
As we moved to the top of the order….
It was time to stop.
2022-07-02 Excuse me is that Mustard Gas…
…or in this case, the only one who didn’t smelt it, dealt it.
We begin the combat with Tiras bitching about not being able to fight in the doorway and having to use his bow. However, it appears that the drow mage is as weak as his magic is strong. He went down in a heap.
Ebon continued recklessly attacking and gave one of his foes the choppy choppy and moved farther into the room.
The door near Nadja opened and another baddie (Troglodytes) swung around Nadja and tried to claw and bite her.
His friends joined, and suddenly, Nadja was surrounded. Fortunately, they mostly sucked.
Stote disengaged and moved out to heal himself.
Nadja cast ‘holy shield’ and moved herself to block the door, heavily damaging one of the troglodytes on the way.
Something in the room cast faerie fire and Nadja and Aquilonia were limned in purple.
The quogoths all ganged up on Ebon and we found out that they have a rage type attack feature as well as their blows (not that kind) rained heavier on Ebon.
Lumpy revived Aquilonia who awoke to find herself LIMNED in purple.
Marta Monnshadow, the high elf we recently rescued, cried out in agony. We wondered who was attacking her.
A bunch of drow showed up on the tracker and did something to Nadja that required a save, but Nadja saved. She failed her constitution check though and down went her shield of faith.
Name moved to help Ebon as that was the best option of which he was aware. He killed two and told Ebon to kill the others and move to the South.
Ebon hacked into one of the qogoths and damaged it heavily.
Then it was the troglodyte’s turn to attack Nadja and the wounds started stacking up. There were a couple crits and things were looking pretty bad. Nadja went down. One of them moved up and attacked Tiras, hitting for a little.
Stote charged back into the room and stabbed the Quogoth in the head. Which did a little damage and then he used hsi bonus action to do a little more.
The remaining Quogoth’s attacked Stote and Ebon and missed Stote and critted Ebon.
Aquilonia, now being conscious, saw Winnie fighting Marta and a Troglodyte all up in her grill to the north. She chose to Firebolt Marta and then Misty stepped to the north of Name.
The enemies started pouring in attacking all willy nilly.
Marta, taking inspiration from Aquilonia, firebolted Winnie and then misty stepped to her north.
Winnie did something to the troglodyte’s brain and the troglodyte face planted.
Tiras carefully considered risks and wne with a healing round. Using the staff for Mass cure and his Second Wind for a little bit more.
Bahgru just revived, took no action.
Ebon killed his Quogoth and moved towards the door.
The southern troglodytes continued to attack Winnie and Lumpy. Mostly Winnie though and she took a bit more damage.
The Trog on Tiras hit with his claws but missed with the bite.
Stote attacked his Q and added his favored foe manually but still didn’t kill him, so he attacked again. Once again favored foe didn’t work automagically, but Bill looked it up and I looked up bukaki at the same time. Bill’s review of favored foe brought some dismay to Stote as it was somewhat nerfed.
Something happened with Nadja that only Sam saw.
Then we heard some sort of fowl+bear roar and wondered what that might be
Q1 kept at Stote with his special rage and did some heavy damage.
Aquilonia cast fireball (with safeties) and killed everybody.
Some more stuff happened south, but it is unclear. Archer was damaged and the drow was missed.
Tiras charged to the south to confront the fowl+bear directly. His first attack did some heavy damage. His second attack would have missed, but Stote inspired him to hit, heaping more damage on the fowl+bear.
Ebon killed his Q with a javelin and moved south to assist Tiras but found him blocking the door.
Stote moved south as Name yelled out “Don’t clump up”. Stote healed his mom with cure wounds and then threw a potion to his father.
More stuff happened with Nadja
Then someone in the room cast a spell that surrounded us with insects and we took some significant bug damage.
The fowl+bear beaked and clawed Tiras pushing him close to death.
Aquilonia tried to dispel the insect swarm but failed.
Lumpy hit the fowl+bear with an arrow and pushed it over the edge. Instead of a big dead body, it faded out of existence.
Winne moved into the room and cast some spell on one of the giant spiders and the drow and did some damage. (Something about black testicles).
Tiras moved into the room and killed the shit out of the drow he could see. Having no other option to attack he moved to a position for next round.
Bahgtru was going to run to Ebon, but Ebon instructed him to guard Aquilonia, which he did.
Taking pride in his pup, Ebon grinned slightly and cha4rge in to attack the giant spider that was on the floor. He did some pretty good damage, but the giant spider looked like it would keep on ticking. Ebon, hating that commercial, de-timexed that bitch.
Ebon didn’t say anything about another drow in the room, so Tiras remained unaware.
Stote moved into the room and daggered the crap out of the giant spider that was engaged to his mom. He critted that biatch but didn’t get sneak attack damage until he ran up the wall and got a little closer.
Giant spider 1 seemed a bit pissed about its meal being interrupted and bit down on Nadja. She resisted the poison but was rendered unconscious with the bite.
A voice from deeper in the room said something in undercommon and suddenly a tree-like, ropey, sappy looking thing appeared.
Aquilonia, not wishing to be bugged, moved into the room.
Lumpy fired a couple arrows and did a bit of damage.
Winnie un-testicled the giant spider and went for ropey-sticky.
Name cast mass heal and was even inspired to fix his 1 but still got a one. Everyone went up a bit.
Bahgtru stayed with Aquilonia.
Ebon ran for the drow deeper in the room. Ropey-sticky got an attack of opportunity but missed. Ebon continued with the leap/chop but only did some damage. He attacked again and did some more.
Stote used his dagger to dispatch the first giant spider. He headed across the cieling for the other one and, just when it seemed he would miss, Nadja flashed a tit and inspired him to hit. He didn’t do quite enough damage to kill it. However, he favored it as a foe and did a little more which was just enough to kill it. He then scampered over to hide behind the column.
Nadja, still grappled by the web, cast guiding bolt at the drow, but failed.
The drow priestess then gave the offer to leave which much of th3e party accepted.
We’ll find out if she’s bull shittin’ next week.
Home is where the heart is – cuz the house is gone – 07/09/22 – ??? – 2+c
2022-07-09 WWtPD (What Will the Party Do?)
..joining our adventurers trying to determine if they will accept the offer of retreat from the drow, we begin by determine WWED. Turns out Ebon can be level headed, and we were just thinking about leaving when ropey sticky thing turned to say something like “what you talkin about drow bitch”. Turning back to Nadja, it said something else (maybe, “nice tits”) and we had to decide what to do.
Stote stuck with the ‘I’ve got everything I want, we should go approach’.
Aquilonia started to think about leaving and waited to see what everyone else would do.
Lumpy went back to drinking (healing potions).
Winnie had a WWWD moment but ended up doing what her child had asked and left with Lumpy.
Name held up to see what would happen to the rest of the party. He will either attack or flee.
Ebon moved at speed out of the room and dragged Aquilonia out on the way by. She did not resist. Bhagtru followed.
Nadja and Stote headed out and Name brought up the rear, closing the door on the way out.
Gerick, the half-elf gimp
Name gave directions from the rear while Stote got paranoid about the webs in the halls ahead.
We quickly made our way the to the stairs up (they weren’t far)
After disguising Winnie we made our way out to the profit machine that is the yawning portal.
As Stote cleared the edge, there were lots of people pointing at him. Using his high charisma score to set the tone, he called one of the perpetrators over. They declined and so Stote went over to strike up a conversation.
Durnan’s attention seemed to be on the wolf as he wanted it out. However, he joined the Aquilonia focus group and as soon as she noticed, he motioned for her to join him the the Comedy Legends VIP Bottle Service Area.
Once away from prying eyes, Durnan advised that she was a wanted woman as her father had admitted to being a part of the slave trade after bodies were found in the basement of Trollskull, which was burned down.
Aquilonia returned to the group and told them we have to go so she can ‘splain this all to us.
Now that we know we have no place to stay, the majority of the party headed to the WinkingKettle to see if they could get all of the rooms. Since Esthralla Hollansford remembered Ebon fondly (and it was low season) she allowed him to get all of the rooms for a week for a mere 75G (8 Suns with the tip)
Name and Stote got to what was left of Trollskull. It was pretty solidly devastated. As they poked about the rubble, Willow (yes Willow) came over and started talking to Name.
He gave quite a bit of back story on the attack and painted a scene of many explosions. Seems like many folks tried to help including Falia (androgynous druid) and one hafling member of the breakfast club who tried so hard to save his favorite breakfast restaurant that he was killed. As his narrative wound down, Name and Stote heard a squealing that had been growing steadily resolve itself into a cart with a large coffin on it. As the drover glanced back and forth between his paper and the remains of the manor, Name approached and asked if he could help. Once he had established himself as the very masculine Aquilona Sandhor, the well paid driver thanked him and left the cart.
Stote checked it for traps and then picked the lock. A quick whiff said death, but Name thought we should check to confirm anyway. Their quick peak revealed a bloated decomposing corpse which was rapidly expanding. Both Stote and Name moved back to avoid the smell and the mess. Name jumped onto the wreckage of the fireplace and put an arrow into the corpse. The stomach immediately burst open from the pressure but it was more than that as a bunch of baddies.
Once again it was time for combat. Name beat out Stote for initiative and went first.
Name attacked the notable creature, the Beholder Zombie, and did some damage with his bow. He called out to the city for help.
Stote moved in for the stab and had challenges with ones until Name inspired him to do quite a bit better.
Willow healed Name with a transparent bear? and sought a way to attack as well, but Name cautioned him to stay back.
The ‘things’ continued to grow and move slowly towards us, not all that threatening.
The beholder zombie moved towards Name and shot him with a black ray that did…. nothing, thanks to a saving throw.
The other balloon things seemed to move forward as well.
Name, gaining some extra health from Willow (thanks Sam) shot the BZ twice more continuing to stack the damage.
Stote moved in for the final blows and finished off the Beholder Zombie. He then considered rushing one of the ‘drifters’ but moved away instead.
We then heard the wind howl and, looking around, saw two riders approaching from the west.
Willow shouted out that “There’s a fungus among us” and then used an Ice Knife to attack one of the floaty things. The floaty thing exploded and sprinkled spores in a large radius.
Name then attacked one of the drifters with his bow and it exploded just like the first one. The second attack blew up one of the smaller ones but there was less of a drift of spores.
Stote reached into his trousers to snatch his sling from it’s resting place as his jock strap (not really) and took out the final drifter.
At that point Elkhar Davian of the house of Snadhor (Aquiolonia’s father, not to be confused with Felemid De Travigion, the dragonborn double agent who came to warn us of the incursion into the basement of Trollskull) filled us in a bit more on what had happened and that he and his wife Ilyrra were going to hide out at a place north of the city that ‘Aquilonia would know from her childhood’. However, when Name asked about the slave trade, he copped to the guilt and advised that Aquilonia knew as well. We all (including Barnaby the guard) felt that something was amiss.
Name felt that things were so amiss that he attacked. At first he missed, but then was inspired to hit.
He returned the favor attacking Name for some damage and using poison (or something like it). Nope, it’s poison.
Name yelled out to Barnaby to aid the righteous group.
Stote then attacked as well and hit both times and kept things going.
Willow got in on the action and attacked with primal savagery and clawed the shit out of the imposter.
Name went ahead and attacked twice but missed with the first, but Willow inspired him to hit. His second attack was as poor as the first and so missed as well.
Fake Mr Aquilonia attacked Name again and did more damage, but Name survived.
Stote swooped in and finished the job. As soon as he was rendered unconscious, his head exploded and a braindog came out. Name made quick work of that and then the hard job of explaining to Barnaby was next. He remained skeptical throughout the explanation This caused Name to think of Mirt, not well know to Barnaby, and then of the private dick that was right up the road.
Stote ran up to summon him and, after figuring out that knocking on the door after Bill has mentioned the bell twice may not be the best way to get a result. As soon as he rang the bell the local detective, Vincent Trench a human, came to the door. Stote asked him to come down and put a gold piece in his hand for good measure.
Back at the scene, Name did a great job of get Barnaby to independently corroborate the story to which Vincent responded with much puffery. Turns out he wants to get paid for everything he does and after hearing of the 50GP price, we thanked him for his time and sent him away. He did provide advice on how to get to the guard before he left so, money well spent.
That’s where it all wrapped up. See you next week….
2022-07-16 Trying to clear Aquilonia’s name
10 Flamerule 10 bells
Back at Trollskull, we gathered all the bodies together and loaded them on the wagon to take them to the Northwest Guard tower. As we approached, the guards noticed that we had a cart full of bodies and immediately came down to meet us.
They were apprehensive about us even after we explained that we were here to clear the injustices done to the Sandhor name and clear the air.
After a bit of conversation, we ended up on our way to see the Masked Lords to answer for our alleged crimes. We gave up our weapons and some minor possessions and joined the guards in a cart to Piergeiron’s Palace in the Castle Ward.
A runner was summoned and we were told we would be speaking with Constable Lowery as Barnabus was unavailable (lot of good NPCs do). Contable Lowery arrived in the company of a dwarven wizard who was introduced as Wizzen.
We told our tale of woe and wonder and the crowd went wild. Of course, the wizard was detecting truth and was able to verify Tiras’ story (except for the Aquilonia location part) and after a slightly longer discussion about clearing her name, it was decided to discuss the situation at length. We answered questions about slaves in the basement and the general condition of the Sandhor family (cuz of the braindogs).
They advised that the real ‘head of the Sandhor family’ had denounced Elkhar and his wife Ilyrra who were actively being sought both at their estate in town as well as their farm outside of Waterdeep in Amphail.
Questioning then moved on to Barnaby who answered directly and corroborated our story.
The questioning then turned from the placement of slaves and the Xanathar and why they might have issues with Stote. We explained somewhat vaguely and they were satisfied enough that our weapons were returned and we were free to go.
Getting back to the Winking Kettle where we join Nadja and Ebon as they untangle the beast with two backs. There was no question as to who performed better, but the question of satisfaction may never be answered.
As they were getting cleaned up and back together, Ebon went by Lumpy and Winnie’s room but received no response when he knocked on the door. Fearing the worst? he decided to kick in the door and readied himself to kill shit.
The door did not seem inclined to agree. Ebon, not to be intimidated by a lowly door, backed up a couple steps and charged the door. It held and, without a sound, dealt Ebon 3 points of damage.
Still not understanding what was going on, Ebon called out ‘alarm, attack’ and went after the door with his axe. Estrella came down the hall alarmed just as Ebon cleared enough of the door to determine there were 4 backs in the Kettle last night.
Sheepishly apologizing to Estrella, Ebon went down to breakfast with Aquilonia. Bahgtru was there as well.
Meanwhile, Name and Stote went over Riataurs Weapons and spoke with Roni and was going to give her the super brief but instead, decided to hook up with her for shopping and dinner at her place. They dropped Stote off at the Kettle and headed off.
Stote walked in to brinner (Dinner for Breakfast) and Ebon was quick to greet him while Aquilonia continued her studies. Stote filled the group in on what had happened and told Aquilonia her father had passed in the oh most delicate of ways. And then went right back to his wings. Growing more tired by the moment, Stote finally was going up to rest.
Aquilonia returned to her room. Ebon did his best to comfort her and sent Bahgtru . Estrella gave her a1 dragon turtle and said she was sorry.
Winnie and Lumpy came down, wolfed down a meal and went back to their room.
After spending some ‘quality time’ Tiras and Roni shared their tales with each other and Roni hinted at how she didn’t want to die alone as her aunt had. Tiras, knowing she was seeking something more permanent. She even went on to discuss the priest Lumgar and her faith and stuff, but Tiras finally got her back to the bed for a long rest (well after a last hurrah). Yay- Long rest.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Ebon camped out outside Aquilonia’s door, until she came out at 11 bells.
Nadja performed a divination ritual to commune with her goddess. She received an answer about Ilyrra Sandhor’s well being.
Then there were several backstories that I will have to listen to the recording to document.
11 Flamerule 8 Bells -Tiras told Roni he would carefully consider her points and would discuss it with her further. He joined the party for breakfast and just went up to check briefly on Aquilonia,leaning over Ebon, and letting her know he was there if needed.
When Ebon finally could take it no longer, he opened the door to find the room in fine order but instead of Aquilonia there was a letter. It explained that she would be at her home and if we found any treasures she would pay us for them.
We gave her our lives and she gave us a pen.
Until next week…
2022-07-23 Well, at least we got a pen, oh wait…
11 Flamerule 9 bells
Tiras and Ebon decide to go down to breakfast and share the news about Aquilonia and her sudden departure.
Deciding to determine her actual disposition, we headed up to the Sandhor Home, the House of the Blades and Thyrsus which is located at the corner of Sul and Delzorin. Reginald (the butler) answered and advised that Aquilonia wasn’t home. A bit of questioning got us no further. A quick pee-pee ruse got us in the door to ‘the foyer’ and Ebon to the bathroom.
Since Bahgtru wasn’t allowed in, Stote and Tiras went out to keep him company. Tiras started with teaching him to sit.
Stote, not being able to sit, decided to scale the walls and check out the upper floors. He almost slipped, but then recovered and continued to the third floor. Peering through the window he was able to make out a divan and a secretary. He jimmied the lock and crept inside.
Ebon, finished with bidness, decided to get back to bidness.
Nadja was glancing around for stuff of interest. Not finding anything right away she moved into the study and tried her wand of secrets to little benefit. She turned her attention to Reginald and finally lured him in with her liquor soaked bossom.
Tiras kept trying to train Bahgtru.
Just as it seemed Reginald had figured out what was going on, he was distracted by Ebon who was calling for Aquilonia.
Stote also heard Ebon calling for Aquilonia as well and after some ‘stage whispering’ (Stote’s actual and Ebon’s closer to the second stage of a rocket) they decided to continue looking separately.
Tiras seemed to be getting the hang of training Bahgtru.
Nadja had engaged Reginald in a loving cup of whiskey and was working her magic on him.
Ebon moved arounds the second level continuing to try to find Aquilonia and occasionally ‘whispering’ up to Stote about his progress.
Stote finished his search and then called down to Ebon that here was nothing of interest upstairs. Ebon immediately shushed him. Stote climbed back down in disgust.
Name was getting the hang of this training thing.
Nadja’s seduction was impaired somewhat by Rginald’s ‘high brow’ lifestyle. However, her approach was finally paying off, but she went all social on us rather than getting valuable information. Instead, she went sort of furry stipperusing her writhing body to hide her somatic gestures as she attempted to use magic to locate Aquilonia. She was unsuccessful
As we all (Except Nadja) gathered around the front of the house it seems that the most successful in their endeavors was Tiras in teaching Bahgtru to sit.
Nadja continued her gyrations and just when it seemed she would fall, she was inspired (yes inspired) to continue on with her dance. Feeling he was as buttered up as possible, Nadja leaned in and tried one final time to get Aquilonia’s location. Reginald was able to identify some places she wasn’t. For example, she definitely wasn’t here. The farmhouse had been cleared. It seemed she may have gone to one of the many villages or hamlets that were north of Waterdeep. At least he was able to guess that she might still be in town. She got some additional information about Reginald not really knowing how much he was supposed to pay us and then she begged her way out to join the rest of the group. But, like Frosty the Snowman, she promised she’d be back again some day.
The group decided to head back to Trollskull. As they made their way back to the manor, a voice from an alley said “hey sexy” and Tiras, assuming it was for him , turned to see Esvela Roznar step from an alley.
Esvlele caught us up on some related activities for the last 10 day. She had gotten rid of the poisons, but kept the large tome for us.
Nadja went over to present Esvele with her brother’s ring and Esvele reciprocated with the tome. When Sote failed to engage, Tiras told her the unfortunate news and then offered her a hanky for her tears.
After Esvele pulled herself together, she rewarded us with 50 Suns each and Bill rewarded us with the experience.
Nadja had the good sense to ask her what she know about the Trollskull debacle and Esvele indicated that her sources indicated the Xanathar were responsible.
Further discussion will need to come from the recording. 2 hrs.
After convincing her to join them, the group continued on to Trollskull with Stote finally realizing who Esvele was.
Tiras spun around and told Bahgtru to sit. He did and joy was shared among the party.
As we arrived at the ruins we noticed that the sidewalks and roads had been cleared and signs posted warning that, if the property was not made safe, it would be sold at auction.
Stote moved over to where the basement had been and noticed that there had been excavation. He tried to contact the spirits but wasn’t able to detect anything until he swore that he would rebuild.
Esvele wondered about Stote’s state of mind and Nadja and Tiras did little to reasure her of his sanity.
We discussed how to rebuild and Esvele indicated she ‘knew some people’
We searched through the rubble and found some stuff. Nadja found a hairbrush that had an embossed crest of the Cassalanters. It seemed to us that it was placed after the attack.
Further investigations led to the old entrance to the sewer and the understanding that they hadn’t gained entry that way.
Some discussion was had with Esvele about the urchins and sech Stote’s into kids.
Tiras indicated he would work on getting the estimates which started with the cleanup. It would take a couple days and cost 50G.
During the downtime:
Stote will try to find safe haven for his parents, trying to tap Esvele, and poking about.
Tiras will be registering as a citizen, checking into fines, and working on the rebuilding, acquiring the building next door, and getting busy with Roni.
Nadja will be trying to put up with the sounds, or lack thereof, coming from Stote’s folks and looking for Aquilonia
Ebon, Stote, and Nadja will be using the urchins to try to find clues about Aquilonia and what happened at Trollskull.
2022-08-13 Maybe we should stretch first?
Unknown Flamerule – Unknown Bells
Stote’s idea for safe haven for his folks was to send them back to Oakhurst – Done. Where they’ll go from there is anyone’s guest. Stote sent them packing with a measly 50 G.
Tiras finds that the fines have been paid by some unknown benefactor. The property next door was owned by a lone tenant with no relatives and had been taken over by the city who were looking to get 5k for it. The rebuilding of Trolskull will cost twice that. We’d better be able to find some money.
Nadja
Stote was able to use his street smarts to confirm it was the Xanathar and that someone had been taking out some of the lower level functionaries of that guild.
Tiras seems to have dodged the bullet for now as Roni was focusing on getting life back to normal.
We spent a bit of time talking about how to rebuild and what materials would be used and confirming that we were actually doing the rebuild.
Whole things were progressing Alextra Fibbersnichitts, a female gnome from the guild of home enchantments. Her presented enchanted card showed a ‘photoshopped’ version of her tipping her hat. Tiras promised that they would talk about details later.
While Stote was at a bar he was ‘recognized’ by someone who said he knew him as one of the Trollskull Baconeers. Stote acknowledged and added he was the leader of the group. The newcomer indicated he had been down there but hadn’t really ever found anything of value. Stote replied that we had found a good time. The stranger went on to talk about the portals and how they had an older woman’s voice warning you away. Stotew completely failed to ask him where they were, or where they had been. Stote’s new friend said that one of his friends had heard that it was Halaster’s ex-wife trying to get folks in trouble. Before he departed, Stote at least remembered to get his name which the stranger said was Jax. That and his eyepatch caused Stote to realize that he was a bit more seasoned than he appeared to be and perhaps it was even Jarlaxyle, but then again, perhaps not. At least he hadn’t been robbed. As Jax departed, …nope, nuthin.
and now, it’s 25th Flamerule – 9 Bells
We spent a bit of time strategizing on what to do next and ended up deciding to head back down to skullport, perhaps stopping on the way to finish up the missed parts of the second floor. Due to some issues with level 2, we decided to move on to level 3.
Ebon who was so impressed with Bahgtru’s ‘sit’ skill that we agreed he would be left with an animal trainer in Waterdeep. This kindly elderly couple was generous and caring and Bahgtru and them hit it off from the start.
Now back to level 3.
We went back to the south, trying to avoid the drow and, after passing through the rundown buildings we had ‘cleared before, we followed our noses to a kitchen where a bugbear and three goblins were being forced to cook by three drow guards. The ‘cooks’ were chained to a ring in the floor and the guards didn’t notice Stote, so he snuck back and gave us the sit-rep.
After informing Ebon that they might be cooking wolf, it was pretty easy to convince him to attack the drow guarding the room.
The surprise round went well as Ebon and Stote took out one and Tiras took out another. Nadja entered and cast a guiding bolt on ‘that guy'(the one she pointed at of course).
Initiative put Stote up first and he glided by Tiras and gave the drow a stabby-stab. His first attack missed and his second, once targeted, finished the drow off.
Tiras held his action to see how the cooks would react. One goblin, Globby, offered his thanks and a ladle of stew. He introduced the other two goblins and the hobgoblin Blarg and accepted our offer of release. We gave them the drow weapons and sent them on their way.
We continued South and after passing a few doors we decided to open one and told Ebon there might be wolf ears. Finding it locked, Ebon immediately began bashing it til it opened. Well, we told him to open it.
The room was empty and looked to have been that way for some time. Closer entry however revealed a large oval mirror with spiders expertly etched into the surface. When Ebon or Nadja viewed their reflection, it changed to the visage of a spider. After a short time, the spider changed to the demon we had met earlier and he cried “I know who you are!”. Then the mirror fell and broke.
Giving up on that room, we moved to the next room which was open. It was plain with a basin in the northern part of the room to which a vein of turquoise , which had been styled to look like a steam and shard of granite which had been carved to look like trout embedded in the stream. Some trial and error led to turning all of the trout in the same direction which caused water to run from the basin and an emerald fish to drop out. Stote grabbed it out and Tiras quickly estimated the value at ~100-500G. With nothing else of interest, we moved on to the next room.
Stote opened the next room and found padded bed rolls on slabs. Each bed had a chest and a quick inventory of all of them revealed just a bunch of simple black clothing such as the drow might wear.
Stote and Ebon, having gone South, ended up in front of a door. When opened, they were confronted with a small group of drow, one who had been saying something until the door opened. At that point, they all turned to fight.
Stote started things off with a near perfect damage roll and killed the first guy. He then ‘Stoted’ his way out of there, calling out the headcount as he went.
Nadja, the new tank, cast Spirit Guardians and then moved into the room.
The little drow biatches started using hand crossbows with poison and, even though Nadja had advantage, they got her with some sort of sleeping poison.
The next one cast faerie fire and got Stote and Ebon and Ebon didn’t save.
The next one came out and hit Ebon with a short sword which seemed like it pissed Ebon off.
Ebon raged and recklessly attacked using his new Great Weapon Master feat to (after inspiration) to kill his closest opponent. GWM attack killed another. His next attack missed, but just barely.
Tiras fired up his Hunters Mark and then fired up his bow. The new colors worked great cuz he killed the first one with an arrow and the second with a crit.
Stote, emboldened by the pile of bodies, moved back into the room and killed another. He moved south and attacked the remaining guy, but missed.
The remaining drow, a female, tried faerie fire and Stote saved again.
Ebon came in to kill the shit out of her but missed with his first attack. His second attack was a crit but just did a bunch of damage.
Tiras came in batting 500 and added to the damage but couldn’t close the deal.
Stote tried to get this over with and discovered that one of us had better bat more than 500.
Nadja continued to sleep, although she smiled when she caught a waft of Tiras’ perfume.
The drow biatch went after Ebon and hit him pretty well. But she too was affected by the 500 rule.
Ebon then went off on her and added 28 more points of damage with his first attack and took her out with his second. She fell with a clatter of weapons.
Then began the searching. While most of the gear was standard, she had a scarab brooch with an insignia and a pouch with 35G.
After waking up Nadja, we continued our clearing.
The first room was an empty storeroom, the second contained something that required initiative. It turned out to be some grimlocks (Yep, name was exposed again.)
Stote led us off by shooting with the bow recently returned by his father. He was able to take down one.
Tiras danced by and shot two to death. He called back to Nadja to hold tight, we had this.
She did.
Ebon loves his Great Weapon Master feat and used it to kill the last one.
While we discussed healing, we didn’t actually do it. The next door revealed 12 troglodytes who, rather than attacking, squealed with glee(?) and fled past us immediately departing to the north.
Moving on to a small room to the east, we found it locked. When we tried the door a male voice called out in drow just two words we didn’t understand. When Ebon kicked the door in, we saw a drow with his pants around his ankles on a latrine bucket.
Stote held his action, but Name shot that drow dead before he could hurl the bucket in the party’s direction.
We’ll find out what else smells bad in this area next week.
2022-08-20 Here begins the super-damage
25th Flamerule ~ 13 bells Bells
We start out with some map testing and then a civil war debate broke out (a battle between north and south)
As history tells, the North won. We headed up a rubble strewn hallway that appeared long unused and found a room with hobgoblins. Tiras did some lite checking and determined that some of them were from the Azrock clan, but there were no further markings of detail.
Stote ‘gloomstalked’ to the south and found several doors.
Ebon, realizing he was alone began to ponder the situation, spooky spider webs, drow combatants and general irritation caused him to bellow quite loudly for the party.
Nadja, hearing him as if he was next to us. She shouted back our location and Ebon came on over.
As Ebon approached, Tiras opened the door and revealed a room full of tables and dishes. It appeared to be ancient dwarven dishware and so Nadja took a closer look to appraise the haul and found a wand (Arcane Focus) that appeared to be of the divination school. She pocketed it to attune later on.
Stote advised that he had found four doors to the South. Speaking of the South, Tiras headed that way to the basin room and washed up, much to Ebon’s confusion.
With hygiene completed, he called out to head north, and so we did. A short hallway revealed another door which led to a finely decorated room with shelves in the north wall.
On the top shelf was incense, and an onyx statue of a spider (classic tarantula). There was also a dagger that was finely made with a secret space in the pommel for holding poison and a mechanism for delivering that poison.The second shelf held a robe of blackened spider silk that was finely made with golden spiders sewn into it. Looks valuable, into the bag. Also on the shelf was a potion of healing
Nadja, checking the bottom shelf (go figure) found another wand and a spellbook (Tarissa’s).
Ebon was keeping a watchful eye on the party and headed over to check out the canopy bed. The dresser next to it caught his eye and he discovered some armor for Stote (lady’s garments) and some small glass vials that may have contained poison in the past.
Stote headed towards a chest on the eastern wall and found it locked. He opened it almost as quickly. In fact, it opened so fast, Tiras hadn’t even finished asking Ebon to look for a key. The chest contained 800 dragons and was adorned with 8 crystal eye that could be pried loose.
As we headed back to the south, Nadja and Tiras were sure there were a couple rooms that they hadn’t been in before. While they were discussing this Stote ran up and opened the door. Quaggoths!
Stote moved into the room and stabbed the closest one several times (three to be precise) This was not enough to kill him. This creature ran out of the room in pursuit and Tiras leaned out of the way so he could get by a (and give Nadja an attack of opportunity.
Nadja used that opportunity to kill the shit out of the first guy with her GWM. She moved into the room to attack the second guy. She would have done this if this wasn’t a dream sequence. Instead she missed.
Nadaj held her main action in case anyone showed up in the doorway, of course, one of the others moved into the doorway and gave Nadja the opportunity to attack again using her GWM but missed that guy as well.
The guy in the door tried his luck with Tiras, but missed both times.
Tiras reciprocated by killing the dumbass in the doorway with a crit and a hit and then moved forward to block the room.
Ebon attacked the one that came after Stote and made him feel safe with a missed and then removed that feeling of safety and replaced it with a feeling of death with his second attack. He moved up behind Stote
Stote, having nowhere to go to get an attack, took the opportunity to remind Ebon that he had done most of the damage on the quaggoth.
The remaining beasty showed he was every bit as efficient as his friend and missed Name twice.
Tiras would have done as poorly, but was inspired to fix his first attack and then Stote sent him some luck inspiration that allowed him to hit with his second.
Ebon wanted to be an over the shoulder javelin holder, but had to throw instead. Since his first toothpick didn’t finish the job, he threw a second. That was enough to do the trick.
Moving into the room they saw that the horrible fishy smell they had been dealin’ with, it was troglodytes
The next room contained a dining room that appeared to be made for dwarves. A quick review of the room revealed nothing other than the matching stone benches and head and foot chairs. Since Nadja sat in the head chair (joke away) Ebon mirrored her and sat his big ass in the tiny foot chair. Cute.
Heading towards the doors Stote had found we got turned around a bit and missed them until we backtracked a bit to the north. Those rooms were uninteresting until Ebon opened
Heading south and then east, we came to a cave on the river with a couple of rafts made from zirc wood and strung together with webbing. There were also a couple of 10 foot poles.
As they were leaving to follow a tunnel to the South the healing staff recharged, indicating it was dawn. At the same time, the hum they had heard occasionally in Skullport was audible as well.
Stote stealthed ahead and he and Ebon came to another cave opening with river access and more rafts. There was also a door with bas reliefs of dwarven warriors, their features long etched away by vandals. There was also some writing likewise damaged and illegible.
Across from the door was a gondola carved with leering eyes with a skeleton wearing a plane black robe and fondling his 10′ pole. Closer inspection revealed horns poking from beneath the cowl of his robes.Being undaunted (or very foolish) we all boarded the gondola. After only a few moments, the skeleton struck a pose of impatience until Tiras asked him to “take us upriver”. The gondolier then began taking us up river. We passed an area to the east we haven’t explored but quickly thereafter arrived where we had left the river previously. We stopped to re-read the poem about the pirate’s booty.
If Skullport’s where ye wish to be,
With the Sargauth’s flow go ye.
If pirate booty is what ye crave,
Fight the surge to the captain’s grave.
Tiras then got back on the gondola and Tiras directed his to take us to the pirate’s booty. North again we went until we came to another opening where the gondola stopped there. We found a backpack with standard adventuring gear. The perishables had all spoiled and the torches were saturated. We took the hard goods and moved on.
Stote suggested that Ebon lead the way as he is soooo stealthy (wink, wink). Ebon delayed so Stote moved ahead until he came to an open area where he smelled sulfur and so he moved back to inform the party.
We all moved forward to where he had stopped but only some of us could smell the sulfer. Tiras edged ahead until he could see an open area. We stopped here to plan and heal Ebon a bit and then Stote move forward and approached the open area. He could make out to the west a skeleton with a rusty short sword in one hand and a tankard in the other. There was shattered chest nearby. The east area seemed empty. The corridor to the east, just below the opening was empty and dead ended about 20 feet in.
Nadja prepped with detect magic. We looked it up. She detected a larger aura of magic about 30 ‘ ahead of us. We decided to move forward and then stopped as two beings that looked like large red gorillas appeared as if they had been invisible. Surprise!
The first seemed to cast a spell that caused roots and vines to spring from the ground and wrap around Ebon and Tiras.
The second focused some magic on Ebon but by some miracle of fate allowed him to make his intelligence save.
Stote opened the show by shooting one of the creatures.
The one to the east then attacked Ebon with a bite and some fisting. His bite was painful and the fisting both did more damage and hurt more, both physically and mentally.
The second creature moved through the entangled area and tried to bite/fist Tiras. His bite hit, but his fisting missed,
Nadja cast guiding bolt on Creature 2 granting advantage on attacks.
Ebon, engaging creature 1, recklessly attacked with his GWM feat and pounded him with the damage. His second attack seemed like it would miss until Nadja fixed it with her war god’s blessing.
Tiras opened by shooting at creature # 1 and taking him down, ending the entangle. He then fired at #2 giving him a bit of damage as well.
Stote, seeing the entangle had ended, charged into the room and running up the wall, superman stabbed him in an extreme parkour attack. It was truly extreme as it killed the second opponent.
As the others explored the room, Tiras took the heads of these beings with the flametongue.
Nadja’s detection seemed to indicate something behind the wall. As we looked into the area, we saw a slot in the wall that seemed larger than a key. As Stote investigated the wall and hole, Tiras searched the pirate corpse. The short sword seemed to be the right size to fit on the hole, so Tiras tossed it over to Ebon to try.
As the sword was inserted into the slot, the ceiling opened up and a moldering chest fell to the floor breaking it open and spilling its contents on the ground., There was silver and gems and a pearl necklace (not that kind) but the most notable feature was an elven skull with something shoved in its mouth. The chest contained 500 silver pieces, a sharkskin pouch with five, no three moss agates (two more were on the floor) . There was also some bone dice and a wizard’s tower bottle made from obsidian. The shriveled sea elf skull held a potion of unknown use. It was blue, so Tiras theorized water breathing, but counseled identification.
Stote went down to check the hall and heard a voice whisper “Psst, hey you”. When he answered, the voice said “you’re fly is down”. Stote said “no it isn’t” and heard nothing further.
When Nadja came closer, Stote told her that the hallway was looking at his dick.
There was some debate about whether or not Aquilonia could have added to the level of comedy, but we ended before it was decided.
See you next time…
2022-08-27 Pre-Hiatus hyjinx (or hey, I shouldn’t drink white Russians
25th Flamerule ~ 13 bells Bells
2022-09-24 Bill’s back – In front of us
Recap – We killed the hags and then explored the area beyond. We found bones on display and well crap…For god sake man, go to the recording, you drunk bastard.
We begin in the cavern with many very lifelike statues. The kind that make you think of the White Witch in the Lion The Witch and The Wardrobe. On the ceiling are some large cocoon type of arrangements. Stote climbed up and determined they were pretty still. A puch caused one to swing, but little else.
We decided to cut down one of the cocoons and Ebon was ready to hit it like a pinata, but fabulous rolling got us off to a true Comedy Legends start. The remains of something, about the size of a halfling tumbled out. Closer inspection revealed nothing.
A closer inspection of the statues (not the one Ebon destroyed last time) confirmed, in Tiras’ opinion, that they were pretty old.
Stote, not wishing to meta-game, climbed down and looked for tracks. We found none.
Heading north-east we got back to the river at a point across from where we originally caught the gondola. There was the boatman.
There was also a crumbled statue of a prince in mail. Unlike the other statues, he did not look fearful, but rather prepared for combat. It is obvious however, he wasn’t.
Tiras crossed the river and fetched the ferryman and, after paying for the first crossing, asked to be taken south to whatever glowing arguing things Stote had seen/heard.
It was only moments later that we were attacked by … something like lights that appeared above our head. One reached out to shock Ebon and did a bit of damage as his muscles convulsed.
Initiative…
With one of them for each of us, the whole party felt a sense of being drained. It did not appear to affect us. The one closest to Ebon gave him a golden shower of light which did not seem to affect him.
Stote’s opponent scored a hit and shocked him with both the attack and a golden shower of light which seemed like it was going to do a lot but didn’t.
Retaliation…
Stote attacked his, and did some damage. And then missed 500.
Tiras.. not wanting to outdo Stote too much, missed and then was inspired to hit.He then used his second wind to heal 15.
Ebon recklessly attacked with his GWM and killed his. He then attacked the one near Nadja but missed.
Nadja killed hers as well.
Tira opponent got in some damage but Stote’s, failed utterly.
Stote swung at his and missed twice.
Name took out the last two (the hell with not outdoing Stote)
Nadja was able to determine that these were some type of undead although none fell in the gondola.
We immediately considered changing out Yelp score for the ferryman to a one. He shrugged it off. Being the only ferryman and all.
As we got closer to our destination, it began to feel unaturally cold.
As we debarked, Tiras was suddenly awash with a feeling of gredd. He was envious of his party and wanted more money for clothes and sech.
The party began to feel, as we explored the clamshell-like cave, that there was always something just at the periphery of our vision.
Nadja cast detect good/evil and immediately detected the presence of three beings.
Initiative….
As soon as the spell was completed, we saw a pirate appear right next to Tiras who called out “Are ye after my buried treasure? Off with ye” Ebon, Nadja, and Stote were all frightened.
Stote, though frightened, managed to heap some damage on the ghost.
Then another appeared and Ebon wasn’t big enough to block Tiras’ view of him picking his head up from the ground and putting it on backwards saying “this isn’t right.”, so he had to save again. Bill, yes Bill, rolled a one. Now Tiras is frightened as well but only of him.
By the time ghost 2 showed up here’s what we have:
Stote is afraid of 1 & 3-Ebon is afraid of all of them-Nadja is afraid of just three-Tiras is afraid of 1 &2.
Ghost 2 flew towards Nadja and then disappeared. Nadja’s arms flew out (like Rick Moranus in GhostBusters)
Ghost 3 then attacked everybody, but actually just Tiras and missed his attempted fondle.
Tiras, not even liking the fondle attempt, attacked ghost 3 and finished what Stote had started.
Nadja, smelling rum and not really knowing what was going on, started to cast eyes on Ebon.
Ebon, not liking any advances from possessed girls, tried to bop Nadja into unconciousness. His first try missed as did his second.
Stote tried to heed Tiras’ advice and kill ghost 1, but missed twice.
Ghost 1, turning his head straight, wondered aloud where his treasure was. Stote responded “Why are you attacking us, we’re trying to defend your treasure?” Ghost 12 then told him to “lead us to the treasure” Nadja/Ghost 2 agreed and added “…break me off a piece of that guy (Ebon).
Tiras quickly dug a hole in the sand and buried 2 Suns. He then said “Your treasure’s right here.”
Nadja/G2 headed towards Tiras and Stote asking where. Just as her giant Nadja boos brushed against Ebon, Tiras told them where to dig. Nadja/G2 started digging in the not so correct area but Tiras provided guidance to correct her.
As Nadja/G2 found the Suns, she cried out “Eureka Bill! We’ve found it!” With that, Bill began to dissipate and G2 also seemed to be gone and Nadja regained her faculties.
We searched the remainder of the cave and found nothing that might indicate buried treasure although we did find some old corpses.
We decided to take a long rest and, while the rest of the party was sleeping, Stote detected the presence of ‘something’ coming from the river. He assumed the form of a wretched, wretched, goblin (and that’s pretty wretched). He then saw several shadows climb from the river and head towards the party.
Initiative…
Tiras went first and, forgetting his Sharpshooter feat, damaged the first two. He then action surged , remembering his sharpshooter and killed two.
The shadows then surged across the sand and attacked Stote. He felt as though his life force was being drained away. The attack did some substantial damage.
The second attacked Ebon and we started to worry as it looked like the only time Bill would roll poorly tonight is when he rolls our saving throws.
The third attacked him as well and the damage started to pile up.
The fourth attacked Nadja and another crit was rolled.
The fifth attacked Tirads and did nine damage.
All now knew the draining feeling.
Ebon began raging and recklessly attacked with his GWM feat. It looked like he would miss, his attorney noticed that he had not used the addvantage from the reckless attack. The new rolls changed the outcomes and two more shadows faded into non-existence.
Nadja, pissed off about a rest interrupted (girl interrupted?) cast channel divinity and used it to turn undead. They were all turned.
Bill, in a wave of benevolent generousness, then reset the long rest. It may have something to do with his dream of java.
We headed back over to the origin of the ferryman, and decided to try the door we had seen earlier. It swung open easily to reveal a small room with more defaced dwarven carvings and another door opposite the one we had entered. We opened that door while longing for a 10′ pole from days of yore.
Deciding to bravely process, we saw a statue immediately in front of us. Nadja could detect others and they were all in various states of finish, none of them done. There were also several large stone blocks throughout the room.
A scratching noise drew Nadja’s eye to the center of the room where a large enormous creature slept, its claws scraping on the floor and creating the noise Nadja had heard. It was 10×10, larger even than the blocks around it.
Stote took to the walls to sneak around and look for another exit. He saw more granite blocks and statues, and a door somewhere out there. He headed up the wall and back towards the party.
Ebon ‘stealthed’ towards the creature to ‘bonk’ it, but as he approached, the creature seemed to smell him (he’s not even hygienically stealthy) and awoke and charged.
Initiative… Stote bitched about another 20, aw gee darn – I got a 4
Stote moved around so he could see what the commotion was and immediately attacked. He missed, but called out a warning.
Ebon, possibly realizing his stealth was undone, attacked. This time he (Brandi) remembered all the features and, batting 500, did some damage.
The creature attacked Ebon with fang and claws (3 of them) and in a flurry of pain, Ebon took a bunch of damage.
Tiras, continuing the 500 average, hit once for good damage and missed once for no damage.
Nadja chose a random radian to attack with her axe and GWM but missed and then reacted with her wargod’s intervention which turned that frown upside down. She did some pretty big damage. After some debate on how the divine strike worked, she did even more. Seeing him all Elton John and shit she used her bonus war priestess to drop her prefect average to a 500 and get back with the group.
She then recalled that this creature could move through stone and that it was some sort of elemental from the plane of earth. She confirmed this noting that as it moved it seemed to glide through the stone, leaving it…undisturbed. Her history check allowed her to recall that the creature could sense treasure and was drawn to it. These beings preferred not to leave their home plane, but when they did they would stay underground. Their preferred treasures were gems and precious metals, particularly platinum.
Stote, sans all of this information, tried to shoot it but missed again. Hmm, maybe that 20 was wasted on initiative.
Ebon went with a swing and a hit. He followed through with the team average of 500.
The creature once again turned his attention to Ebon and the claws drove him closer to the brink. We started to worry. Then the bite pushed him over the edge. However (and pay attention to this Joe) Ebon’s relentless endurance bounced him back to 1 hit point.
Tiras missed udderly and that was that.
Nadja, reminiscent of the battle with the shadows, simply banished the creature.
We searched the room checking out the statues and the first one was of a dwarf girlshild riding on the shoulders of her father. The father’s torso was unfinished. She also noticed that one of the granite blocks was a fake. It appeared to be made out of plaster.
She called the group over and pointed out the flaw and we ….
…checked on Ebon’s health. Tiras gave him 4 crappy heals. Nadja gave him one equally crappy one.
Nadja started to chip into the fake stone and found it was only about 3″ thick. Once enough was removed to see inside, we discovered an alabaster throne of perhaps elven design. It was intricately carved to resemble branches with a tiny bird perched on one of the branches towards the back.
Nadja invited Stote to take a seat and a quick check of how he felt about it, he was sort of okay. He side-eyed her the whole time he approached it. Sitting in it didn’t make him feel any different.
Nadja however realized that the ‘plaster’ was made from the same alabaster material as the throne. She thought she might have recalled a story about a throne that belonged to an elven kingdom in the north called Illefarn. Before the kingdom feel, the throne disappeared and the dwarves may have recovered it. It had previously been rumored to be somewhere in the dungeon. The party recalled someone having been interested in it’s whereabouts. Thanks to the mighty google, Nadja was also able to recall….it was actually…c’mon Bill the suspense is killing us…we would guess that it was as long ago as 150 years.
Tiras attempted to lift it and was able, finding it to be somewhat lighter than it should be. A quick detect Magic from Nadja however, found nothing.
Nadja wasable to use Stone Shape to repair the cube flawlessly.
Here is where we stopped.
2022-10-01 Ian’s a 66% pussy 33% of the group affected
For those of you doing math, you might wonder where that extra percentage went..
We began in the block room. t’was a bgass room.
We decided to exit stage North. It was Stote’s hand on the door BTW, but no ill effects.
We entered a 5′ wide corridor where a large stone block had fallen and crushed something. Unfortunately there were no ruby slippers for Stote, but there was some inspiration.
Stote scrambled over the block and checked the exit door for traps. He did detect that there may have been one, but it appeared to have been triggered (perhaps by a goblin).
As we got into the perpendicular hallway, we could see/hear something dragging itself towards us from the west.
Stote went to investigate and Ebon stealthed after him. It turned out to be a Drow male with two broken legs. He was unable to answer Ebon and instead passed out.
Calling Nadja forward, we healed him to the point where he could call out hoarsely that he had to get a message to Tarrissa. Stote then explained that we could take the message as we were some of the shock troops for Tarissa.
Eying us suspiciously, the wounded Drow advised that they had been beset by Duregar on the lower layer and then caught between the Duregar and Kuo Toa (those damn frog people). He croaked out something about needing help against the Aboleth as it was too powerful.
At this point he seemed too weak to continue so Ebon administered some water to help him along. Even though Tiras tried to distract himEbon was successful and the drow recovered somewhat.
The ungrateful wretch had the nerve to ask for better healing and Ebon retorted by healing himself.
Stote asked aloud, if we wanted to go fuck up a drow bith. When the drow male looked alarmed, Stote said he was just kidding which seemed to assuage his fear.
Stote then said he would go get the captain and , using hsi disguise self, came back around the corner in the form of a Drow Elite. Our new friend didn’t buy this, he said something in Drow and the jig was up.
Finding out that we weren’t with him, the drow began to try to crawl away. Long story short, we could only provide the mercy of a quick death, Tiras killed him and tossed him in the short block hallway.
We decided not to go after Tarissa and instead head south to areas unexplored. Stote took the ceiling route and headed south. Ebon followed closely and was fine until something (Stote) reached down and tapped him from the ceiling. Ebon shouted in startlement, and Stote had to reveal himself again to set things right.
After we went down the corridor to the southwest, we arrived back at the gondola launch.
About face. We then turned south-ish again and continued. At some point vision got a little sketchy and some things started flying out of the darkness towards Ebon.
He was hit by a couple darts and both he and Stote assumed Drow darkness.
Stote moved farther south towards the sound of the darts and found whatever he found.
Initiative…after the fact
Tiras called out to Ebon to see what he could see. Ebon replied nothing. Tirad called out to fall back and then moved back into the SW corridor.
Stote now had the action above (remember how I said ‘after the fact’?
The drow then cast Faerie fire and Ebon saved and Stote failed. His luck kicked in however and he fought off the effect with his second roll.
The next drow cast the same and Stote succeeded but Ebon failed. They won’t know until he’s out of the magical darkness, but that’s for another round.
The rest of the group attacked him and hit him a couple times with their ridiculous hand crossbows.
Ebon then heeded Tiras’ warning and fell back a bit.
Nadja also moved back and cast bless on herself, Tiras, and Ebon (Who had a small bolt sticking out of his chin).
Stote attacked one of the drow and killed the shit out of him. This revealed him briefly, but he immediately moved and hid in a corner.
The drow reacted by casting FF in the general area of Stote, but he saved yet again.
Ebon moved back and prepared an action we had to look up. Turns out he will be using a javalin (Oh boy!)
Nadja prepared ‘Toll the Dead’ for the same general area.
With everyone else hiding back the way we had come, we left all the killing to Stote. He did not disappoint, bringing down a second drow and then moving back to his hiding place.
Everyone generally did nothing so we waited to see what would happen with Stote. He attacked another drow but didn’t kill him. His shifting of the hunter’s mark however was audible enough to give the drow some idea where he was.
They retaliated and managed to hit him (cuz Bill didn’t subscribe to double disadvantage.).
Ebon had had enough of this waiting around and headed south to help Stote. He paused when he got to the darkness, still recalling the small bolt he had just pulled from his chin.
Nadja moved into the hallway and prepared to attack anything that came ouyt of the darkness.
Tiras, tired of waiting about, headed south and had just enough left in the tank after his double move to get one arrow off at the drow Stote had injured and blew him apart.
Stote moved back out into the area and alerted Tiras to his position. He then fired and took out yet another drow. Stote could also see the remaining drow hanging above the river and moving south. He informed Tiras of this.
Tiras called out “Get down here, all ten of you”.
The Drow then had some challenges targeting things, but still seemed to miss.
Ebon, confused by Tiras’ 10 count, looked at Nadja and asked, what does he mean, all ten of us? Nadja wasn’t confused at all and said “He was lying, get down there!”. Off went Ebon. A double move later, Ebon was able to look downriver and see the retreating drow.
Nadja, heeding her own advice, double moved south to get just beyond the darkness.
Ebon and Stote were able to observe the southern shore engulfed in darkness and the final drow disappearing into the area.
As Stote cried out information to Tiras, a bolt came out of the darkness and missed Stote.
Tiras returned fire into the darkness and was (possibly) rewarded with a cry of pain.
Stote began to move across the walls to get a better angle to attack and when his attack might have missed, luck prevailed and he hit.
Some bolts came back and missed Stote. There may have been a spell as well, but we’ll never know cuz everyone saved.
Nadja moved forward 25 feet.
Tiras made a small circle, but being able to see nothing, headed back to his starting spot.
Stote headed back towards the group and as he approached, Ebon caught sight of him out of his peripheral vision. When Stote gave the sign of ‘I lost sight of them, Ebon called out ‘What, you can’t see anything?” and Stote just shook his head.
The drow fired at Ebon to no avail.
Ebon, continuing to pace the shore, threw a javelin randomly at the other shore.
Nadja moved closer to cover and waited.
Tiras fired back at the direction that the bolts had come at Ebon and his first shot was rewarded with a cry of pain.
Stote followed suit and fired into the darkness as well.
Ebon chucked a javelin into the darkness.
Nadja had to hold her ground
Tiras checked the water depth and, as he was observing the area for things that allowed the drow to escape, he noticed something shiy on the west side of the opening the party was in. Moving ovber to check things out, he determined a grappling hook was stuck in the wall and a rope like thread went from there across the river. His quick calculation that he could only cross at about 15′ per turn, caused him to alert Ebon that he had found a way across the river.
Stote fired into the darkness and may or may not have hit.
Ebon moved to the rope and tried to cross, but fell off about 10′ across. He decided to swim across.
Nadja…well, what could she do – Dammit Sam, where are you?
Tiras then took a shot at the rope and got a bit farther than Ebon. Then, it was into the darkness.
Stote’s shit then just fell apart and we tried to fix it. We couldn’t but Bill came up with a wierd workaround that let Stote shoot blind into the darkness.
Ebon felt the shore under his hand and went into the darkness swinging blindly. He killed the shit out of some open air and then moved further forward.
Just at that moment, a drow warrior came running out and attacked Nadja.
Finally able to do something, Nadja countered the attack with a War Axe GWM hit, then another, and lest I do Sam injustice, I did add the 7 extra damage for her Divine Strike. 47 points of damage
And there we ended….
2022-10-15 We’re all finally back – in front of us
The notes were read back in and there was much rejoicing.
We began with Tiras completing his traverse of the river and entering the darkness. Just as he reached the wall and …
Stote then went with the wall ceiling wall route and managed to cross above the darkness. Unfortunately, much like Khan, Fantasy Grounds doesn’t understand three dimensional combat. Bill improvised successfully and Stote caught sight of a drow. Having burned all the fuel in the tank just to get there, he stealthed away until the next round.
The darkness vanished and the drow began unloading on Ebon with their little shortswords.
Ebon, now able to see, surveyed his situation and decided to attack. He would have attacked anyway, but we threw him a bone and pretended to be amazed by his situational awareness. Joe reclaimed Ebon in fine style by rolling a 27 to hit and then max damage. It became clear that these were male drow as one of the appendages removed earned him the new moniker Ebon the Castrator.
The drow attacking Nadja missed and she retaliated by forcing him to go down (in front of her, not on her). She then moved to the water’s edge. Nadja was able to determine that this was some sort of outpost. There were small caches of drow weapons and the like.
Tiras moved around a bit to get the sitrep and then took out the last visible drow with a single arrow.
Joe then rolled a 1 and a 20 for no particular reason – sue Billy Joel.
There seemed to be no other opponents.
Looking about and searching the bodies we found a small skeleton and the drow weapons and armor which we took. Tiras went back and collected the grapple and 40′ of spider silk rope.
We all crossed back over. Stote walked, Ebon swan, and Tiras went for a squim. Those in the water felt things bumping them under the water.
As they headed back to the north, they saw a corriderto the east that they hadn’t noticed. Moving down the tunnel, Ebon with typical stealth, a foul smell growing more and more powerful as they moved forward.
The tunnel opened on a scene of the slaughter of Troglodytes. A real overkill was evident.
Stote, heading south, found an archway whose keystone and base stones were covered in runes. The runes appeared to be an old man clutching a staff. Nadja tried pressing/punching it like a botton.She prodded around the archway looking for other options for activation as well.
Noticing that there were three stones etched with the man with the staff, Tiras, finding out he was the only one with a staff, tried to walk through and met only the wall. He then tried to trace the archway with his staff, but since it was rough, he had to reconnect at certain times. The third time he connected with the archway, the wall shimmered and turned to a dark mist similar to the other portals.
Thinking quickly on his feet, Tiras asked Nadja if she had ‘heard the voice’, he then baited Ebon into passing through. As he did, the rest of us saw a symbol, sort of like an F or flag with an eye under it.
Only a brief delay found the rest of the party, perhaps plagued by the guilt that Tiras was feeling passed through the portal to….
…a small room with the inverse of the portal and a door in the north wall. Ebon expertly checked it out and opened it. The next room was a bit bigger and contained the top of a spiral star and two niches with elven statues. Each had a shield with a tree on it. One was an oak tree, the other a pine. The walls were also adorned with the image of elfs flying through space on sleek wooden crafts and fighting with orcs and even dragons.
Having had enough of the art lesson, Ebon sensually opened the door to the north and found an ossuary. A room carefully decorated with the bones of victims.
Nadja moved into the room to search for hidden or secret chests. She discovered a secret door to another room.
There was then a break for birthday wishes and discussions of the medieval fair.
Ebon moved forward to find a room that had been swept clean of dust. In the floor was a 15′ stone device set into the floor. A 9′ circle with an elven face was in the middle of the device surrounded by…
Before we could investigate further, we were attacked by giant toads.
Initiative…
Stote went first, and shot one with his bow, wounding it.
Then cometh the toads. The first attacked Nadja and (Bill said “oh, I see) with a bite and missed.
The second attacked Tiras and missed as well.
The third, penalized by the mechanics, had to go a bit south and attacked Tiras as well, but also missed.
Tiras, not liking all the slimy tongue stuff, attacked one of the toads and, not killing it with his first hit, killed it with his second. One immediately moved in to take it’s place.
Nadja, liking the attack twice, kill once, did the same using her last war priestess feature.
Ebon, trying to make sure he was using his buttons correctly, He figured it out and ended the existence of a third toad.
Top of the order.
Not wanting to enter the room, Stote used his bow to attack and do some damage to the remaining toad.
The last toad in the room tried to swallow Tiras and failed, and that shall be his undoing.
Tiras hit both times but was still unable to bring the last toad down.
Nadja finished it off with Max damage.
Now being able to finish our investigation we saw two additional rings three feet thick with the outer ring having images of the sun in various positions as well as the moon in its phases, The inner ring had creatures (bird, butterflies, and fish) surviving the seasons.
There was a fixture at one point and this made Tiras think this was a clock. After watching for like 5 minutes, it appears he may have been correct.
Nadja also perceived that the ‘clock’ was aligned to the proper season of summer, but was unsure about the moon phase.
Further observation from Tiras and Nadja made them think that they could turn the wheels manually but Tiras felt that this might be better if we wait.
We left and followed Stote’s markings on the floor that let us know he had gone down.
We ended up in a room decorated with pictures of elves in cloud chariots pulled by fiery horses through starry skies. Stote had moved on ahead and found a room filled with wooden debri. In this room was a table and upon that table a staff. Screwing up his nerve, Stote crossed the floor and picked up the staff. As he did he noticed that the ‘debris’ was actually broken staffs. He also noticed a fresco of a faun (sure, they said satyr) dancing with butterflies around him. As he left the room and threw down the staff. We picked it up and placed it in the bag of holding.
Moving to the more northern door, we ended up on a balcony looking down over a throne room with a giant tree (which we correctly guessed was Halastree). A large dog-like creature and something with boobies.
Looking down we saw that the pillars were shaped like stone trees with their branches and leaves intertwining to form the railing over which we now looked.
It turned out that the boobies belonged to an elven woman who was meditating on a yellow throne covered with eyes.
Before we moved around the balcony, Tiras noted a disparity between the size of the balcony area and the size of the staff room.
A small niche area held a chest with a depiction of worms burrowing out of the ground. Stote took a quick look and noted that the lock was unusual and far more difficult to pick than normal but he is more adept than normal and opened it without much ado (other than the ado he created with his description of the act). Inside were a pair of earrings, an armband made of overlapping gold leaves, and a silver teardrop earring made from a real tear. There was also a crystal globe within which appeared to be a small effigy of Hallaster.
And we’ll detect magic next time…..
2022-10-29 Level # 5! and 3 and 4 and 3 and …
There was much rejoicing before the notes and then a little bit after.
We rejoin our group above the balcony ready to detect magic. With Sam not here, that task will fall to Me who will be playing the role of Nadja.
Instead of casting detect magic, we placed the goodies …..
As we were about to place them in the bag of holding, a small white kitty appeared at Ebon’s feet. Instead of meowing, a woman-ish voice said “I know not whence you came but please return the items to where you found them”.
Stote and Tiras whispered quietly that we would still know where they were later.
Tiras called down to the odd group below that the stuff was replaced and we’d be right down and he then promptly headed a way we hadn’t been…Fingers Crossed.
We made our way around the balcony to a door which opened on a small room with frescos (not friezes) of an elven forest. There was a stair down, so we took it. Once he reached the bottom, Bill had to find out how to touch Ebon to move us to the next map.
Ebon opened the double doors onto the courtyard. Upon entering, we were greeted by Willow who apparently can answer our questions. There was a comedy Q&A and we moved on.
Tiras asked some of the basics and found out that this tower was Willow’s home. Halaster had created this world for her over 200 years ago. When Ebon asked where Halaster was we got a whole ‘Patrick Swayze ‘he’s like the wind spiel’.
Ebon started hitting on her by asking what she liked to do and we found out she likes slipping stones among other things. He then tried to give her a drink and found out that she didn’t drink fermented liquids.
Trying the old ‘hit on her friend approach’ Ebon asked about the feline in the room. Willow told us that the creature was a displacer beast named Christen who was once her companion but Halster turned him against her and she was forced to convert him into this form with the help of many forest creatures.
She then regaled us with her tale of Lynarc and their journey here and his wish that she stayed here forever resulted in her killing Lynarc and then remaining as penance for her misdeed.
Willow then advised that we could stay as long as we liked as her guest but we should be cautious of werebats that dwelt nearby. She further advised that all creatures here, except the fish, were under her protection and any molestation would raise her ire.
Tiras asked for the rules and Willow had one but we’ll get to that later. Do no harm to animals or trees and start no fires. We can pick berries, pick up twigs and acorns and sleep on mossy logs.
She also advised that there was a green dragon here with whom she had made a truce as he had changed his spots.
Further observations showed that Halastree’s face bore a striking resemblance to Halaster and in speaking with Ebon, we found he couldn’t locate Halaster.
Madja asked what level we were on and Willow said this is referred to as the 5th level of the mad mage as other adventurer’s had called it when passing through.
Tiras then took the opportunity to remind the party that our purpose was back on level 3. A bit of haggling got the party going back the way we came and without much more talking, except to confirm that she might smoke a bit of weeds.
Arriving back at the south room of the hobgoblin passage we found it guarded by the hobgoblins who were also cleaning up the remains of drow from what was obviously a large battle. After teaching the guards how to play kick the dead drow and finding out that this was likely the result of the combat the injured drow had mentioned earlier in the adventure, the group decided to head to level 4 to pursue the Durgar that might have the dagger we were seeking.
We headed down to level four through the tunnel indicated by the hobgoblins.
We entered a cave type area and followed the only tunnel out and south to an area filled with large fungus and mushrooms. Stote was able to locate some footprints going south. We followed them until Stote found ones that were even larger and deeper.
Ebon, was nonplussed by Stote’s taunt of something being lager than he, although he did flex a bit.
Stote continued on in ‘super stealth’ mode following the larger tracks. The walls were studded with fungus that looked like human flesh or casks depending on their type. The mushrooms were plentiful here as well and their bright blue caps were almost as tall as Stote.
Stalactites hung from the 30′ ceiling and many ended in needle-like points. None littered the ground below. He then heard breathing from something large and, thinking it was a good time to have the party handy, so he came back and told what he recalled.
It was decided we should take a short break and that prompted Stote to recall the breathing. A minor detail he had omitted from his first description.
It was decided that we should take a long rest so we headed back up to the hobgoblin encampment.
After inspiring the guards with more tips on drow kicking we moved north to find a suitable campsite. The first room was occupied by a smelly Otyugh (Bill says Oh-Tee-Ukk) so we moved on.
The second room had two goblins worshiping some worm statue they had found but they quickly cleared out when instructed.
Tiras wasn’t satisfied with the undiscovered arewa to the south and so headed down there to see what was up. Turns out the room was occupied byt what appeared to be gas spores. However, as soon as Tiras move into the room, it became apparent that it was a beholder zombie and some gas spores.
Being of generally poor attitude and somewhat grumpy, Tiras called out for aid and got ready for attack.
Stote surged into the room and stabbed the closest gas spore which immediately exploded and spread a cloud of poison spores over Tiras and Stote. Tiras saved while Stote, even with his newfound luck, did not.
Some research later, we determined that Stote had taken some damage and was infected by something (not sure if he knows that).
Ebon, hearing the sounds of combat (mostly Stote’s scream after a popping noise, charged in and made the bad situation a bit worse by popping another gas spore. We all saved so it wasn’t as bad as it could be.
Tiras then fired two arrows into the beholder. One would have missed, but Tiras was inspired to get the hit. The damage was not enough to kill it.
Nadja moved into the room and cast spiritual weapon in the form of a fleshy club (yeah, you know what i mean) and struck the ZB for some damage. Her follow-on Toll the Dead was saved against.
The ZB then used one of its rays to launch the remaining gas spore at the group and once again Stote failed and again his luck did not work out.Tiras would have suffered the same fate, but instead he was inspired to fight off the effects.
Stote, being more than a bit pissed off, attacked the ZB and with Sneak attack and favored foe, couldn’t bring it down. His follow-up was a crit and pushed it over the edge.
Nadja was able to detect the disease on Stote and remove it with a lesser restoration.
We then cleared the air of any lingering spores and set up for the long rest.
Next time, we’ll be well rested.
2022-11-12 – Bienvenue dans le Donjon du Mage Fou
The notes were read in Waken, french and then regular as the first two are just too damn slow. Fortunately, there was some time as Bill had some sound issues.
We start the evening well rested…
We headed back down to the 4th level and re-familiarized ourselves with the initial area (Bill described it again). In the course of our observations, Stote noticed one of the larger tree-like mushrooms had been removed. Carefully, but still gone.
After a bit of debate, Stote decided to sneak back into the north west chamber and learn a bit more. As he moved into the area, he heard deep voices and retreated for a bit of help.
As he and Ebon started back in, Ebon was able to hear the voices to his left. He began to creep forward to see what he could see. As he rounded the corner, he caught sight of a large creature with two heads. They were discussing things amongst themselves and being quite conversational:. “I thought I heard something nearby”, “Perhaps you did, you have always had the better hearing”. The heads nattered away as they continued to prepare something to go into their pot.
Ebon signaled back to us what he saw and by some miracle, we picked up on it. A few moments of silent contemplation later, Ebon plodded back to the group. He informed us that the Ettin seemed to know someone was here and they might be making dinner for someone or of someone.
Having had enough of this, Tiras, his loud answers not getting the response from the ettin he expected, decided to head forward and break the stalemate.
After introducing himself, we learned that their names were Jibber and Jabber and that the level was occupied by ‘spider folk’ (Drow/Driders?), Fishy folk (Kua Toa?), and smelly lizard folk (??).
We all gathered round and accepted bowls of soup (skull bowls) and after a bit of sleight of hand everyone eventually tried the soup with varied levels of distaste. However, once it was mentioned, JJ recalled that he had forgotten the salt. After some in-talking, JJ wandered off to rectify the situation and came back with something that ‘they’ ground up in a bowl with what looked like a thigh bone.
After the addition of this seasoning, Ebon’s impression of the soup changed 180 degrees. Ebon was so wowed that he got the recipe and made lifeplans for this soup. Some more talk about soups and seasonings brought us to our next foray of delivering some of the seasoning to the ‘alchemist.’
Ebon found that the soup recipe is: Zirkwood mushrooms and Barrel mushrooms and pink ‘seasoning’..
JJ advised that he could lead us to the alchemist and would lead the way as far as he could, but he can’t fit through the narrow gaps. He warned us of piercers, said his good-byes and headed back to soup town.
The cavern we entered had an even larger variety of mushrooms and, sure enough, we even observed a piercer moving a bit before freezing when we entered. Stote found the tracks of what could be Duregar and bugbear, and perhaps even a troll.
Ebon was the first in and saw a small humanoid in the a typical alchemist lab with bubbling concoctions and a condenser condensing. The alchemist heard Ebon and turned to greet him, extinguishing a few things in the process. He greeted (introducing himself by saying “Call me the alchemist”) Ebon who responded with the message that JJ had sent us with some seasoning.
It was apparent this alchemist was either a tall gnome or a short halfling and as he made his way around the rough hewn stone block he was using as a table, he invited Ebon to make himself at home. They discussed Ettins and JJ and the length of their relationships.
The alchemist went on to talk about his potion shop and listed some of the things he had. Top creations were Comprehension and Wakeful Rest. He wouldn’t accept coin but would take things in trade. Specifically he would take 20 lbs of edible fungi and 5 tongues of madness.
Once the subject of the piersers came up. Tiras offered to clear the cave next door of them in exchange for two potions. We moved into the cave and began the slaughter. While stote and Ebon got covered in the piercers smelly ichor, Nadja and Tiras avoided close contact even though Tiras lost 7 arrows in the process.
After the room was cleared Tiras went to show off to the alchemist who was somewhat happy with the result but definitely put off by the smell. Tiras offered to bury the piercers as a favor and, once that was done, two potions of watchful rest were delivered. The rest of the day was spent gathering fungi and tongues which got us enough for two more potions. One more Wakeful rest and one Comprehension.
While interacting with him, Tiras pushed for additional details and learned that the ‘smelly lizard people’ probably meant Troglodytes. He also warned us of hostile creatures to the east of the caves that held the piercers. These are ground bound creatures with many tentacles that would try to pull you into its large gaping maw.
Our new friend’s origin seemed similar to everyone else’s. Grabbed by Halaster about a year ago and delivered here with little or no memory of his prior origins. He ‘splained that he was somewhat satisfied with his situation and had no need to move on. He also told of the Durgar passing through and how they had had a combat with the Drow which it seemed they would lose until the Kua Toa jumped in. His final note was regarding Darribeth, a female mage that seemed kind of crazy.
As we went back up to sleep it off, Tiras explained all the reasons he doesn’t like ‘The Alchemist’. – Time there, story of origin, areas explored.
He left them with those thoughts to sleep on. See you next time….
2022-12-03 Back in the Dungeon Again
Steve says he knows what the last title meant, but did not translate.
After a bit of re-hashing of the details from last week and past adventures which seemed to bid us go east. We did take not of the sounds of running water from the south however.
As we got to the next area, Ebon (on the ground) noticed much that Stote (on the ceiling) did not. There were bits of broken armor, spent arrows, and even coins scattered about the area.
We decided to tighten up a bit as this was the area the alchemist had given a warning about.
As Stote moved to the north, Ebon was surprised by something strong and long and course reaching out from the darkness to grapple him.
As he cried out in alarm, we felt something sharp pierce his shoulder and his cries almost turned to pain. The damage continued as the creature was as fast as it was stealthy. Ebon may have been again tempted to cry out again, but again, did not.
Tiras moved to attack and seeing that this creature had as many as 5 testicles of roughly 15′ in length, decided on a bow approach and piled some damage on to the creature.
Stote dove in to lend a hand and popped the creature for a bit more damage, but revealed himself to another in the meantime.
That creature was quick to respond and managed to hit Stote with his second testicle.
Nadja gave herself a shield of faith and then tolled the dead on the creature attacking Ebon, but didn’t ring true.
Ebon was more than a little pissed and managed to get his axe out and do a bit more damage to the creature.
The creature 1 grappled both Nadja and Tiras and then bit Ebon for a bit more damage.
Creature 2 dragged Stote close and began it’s attempt to devour him.
Tiras, after a bit of figuring out advantage and disadvantage was able to hit creature 1 with his bow and kill it. He then broke himself out of the tentacle.
Stote attacked the creature and , not killing it out right, cried out for help.
Nadja broke free and moved.
Ebon broke free and moved to Stote’s aid and will probably kill everything next round.
The creature tried to bite Stote but missed again. It did not miss however when grappling Ebon.
Tiras hit once and missed once but did some damage along the way.
Stote hit again with his first attack and missed with his second.
Nadja again tolled the dead with no effect (other than to upset Nadja).
Ebon freed himself by chopping the tentacle that held him and preparing to kill the Roper.
The Roper immediately re-grappled Ebon and tried again to bite Stote but missed again.
Tiras piled damage on to the Roper with his first arrow but would have missed with his second were he not inspired to do a bit better and finish it off.
After the second was dead, Tiras advised Ebon that he might get out some of his frustration by seeing if these ‘Ropers’ had their treasure inside them.
Stote healed Ebon a bit and Tiras set about finding arrows and coins between the two.
As Ebon headed south to chop up the first one, Nadja cast ‘Ass Slap of Healing’ and gave Ebon back about 20 points.
The ropers had 2 gems worth about 100G each and Tiras managed to find 32C and 11S but no usable arrows.
Ebon used his hit dice to heal himself a bit more and then the party headed south as that running water sound was nagging at Tiras.
We found the river Sagoth again and here it was shallow enough to allow us to wade out and look up and down stream. Finding nothing, Stote decided to tote a rope across the ceiling and, once fastened with one of Nadja’s bolts, we all made our way across.
The foul smell we all noticed was quickly secondary as a Kuo-Toa came up from the south.
In undercommon, the Kua Toa asked who we were and why were we in their home. Nadja, acting as translator, took Tiras guidance to advise them that we were hunting drow for blood and treasure. Nadja said roughly this so the Kuo- Toa gave us some direction to where they might be on the other side of the river.
Nadja then asked about dark dwarves, the Kua Toa asked why she might ask that but after some debate, she didn’t.
As the conversation was ongoing, some additional Kua-Toa arrived and helped with the map and directions. An exchange of food later and we were ready to be on our way back across the river.
Tiras was able to recall that the Kuo Toa are often enslaved by other races and are generally considered neutral (leaning towards evil) they are also a religious race and tend to overdo it a bit when it comes to worshiping stuff.
We rigged the rope back up and crossed back over, retrieving the rope with the help of our new Kuo-Toa buddy who gave us a wave as we headed back north.
What will we find? We’ll learn that next time….
2022-12-10 – Damn newbies
Tink got a bit of background of how her party had been traveling on the third level, through an area they had felt was cleared, when they encountered a fairly large drow party which was more than her group was capable of fighting. It is possible the rest of her group had been slain and most of her gear, except her scale mail, had been taken. In her conversations with their leader, she understood that his intent was to put her to some use in the mines. Not knowing where she was, other than the fact that she was going further below ground. Her attempts to break free failed, but she feigned unconsciousness and waited for her opportunity.
The rest of the drow decided to run a gang thing on Nadja, since they had seen she could take it.
The first drow missed, we’re not sure how but the dice don’t lie. Another came after the first, sort of train style, and he missed as well.
The others fanned out and began checking the area for others.
Ebon moved up and was traveling at his speed and called out for Nadja. (Tiras did a face-palm-sigh)
As the drow heard Ebon and brace for incoming, Nadja smiled and said, “you have no idea.” The drow swallowed nervously, but held his ground.
Tiras continued moving forward and had to double move again. As he came to the end of his sprint, he saw a drow ahead and took cover behind a shroom.
The drow holding Nadja made an attempt to disembowel her, but his sword glanced off her armor.
Stote moved up into combat range and hit with his first. He would have missed with his second, not being as lucky as he thought, but was inspired to hit instead. His favored foe really did favor his foe as it kept rolling ones. He then headed up the large mushroom towards the tip.
Nadja stood up (not way different than kneeling) and cried out something inspirational and cast spirit guardians.
As Tink was dropped to the floor, she began to recall some details she had heard about Nadja and her group. Their affiliations with both the Zhentarim and Xanathar(dating one and affiliated with the other) She had even witnessed Nadja flattening Rusty in the YP. No longer hanging, Tink tried another attempt at freeing herself to no avail. Thinking that the possum act was working so far, she stayed still but glanced around for some form of advantage.
Ebon moved into the area, very stealthily, watching Stote the whole way (Two of the preceding statements are false). As he moved into the area, the drow Stote had hit, attacked Ebon with a whip doing tiny drow damage. Barely phased by this, Ebon wiped the back of his hand across the wound and gave it a lick.
Tiras moved out until he could see an opponent and called out to the other 10 to circle around to the north. He then targeted an armored drow and hit him once. He would have missed but his inspiration turned that frown all the way upside down and critted. Still no death, but lots of damage.
Nadja’s drow finally hit her and the damage was substantial due to poison, but thanks to her dwarven resilience, it was somewhat reduced.
The armored drow missed Nadja but his Ebon for some pretty good damage. He then attacked again and did more and finished things off with his whip.
Stote leaned in to attack as well and did more damage to the armored drow. Not dropping him with his first attack, he hit him again with a crit. He then retreated to the top of the mushroom and drew his bow calling to Ebon…Finish Him!
Nadja, glancing around to see who was pissing her off, ok who was pissing her off the most, set her eyes, and her attacks on the Elite Drow. Her war gods blessing allowed her to hit where she might have missed and her war priestess ability let her attack again, but even with inspiration, she was unable to land the second attack.
Her spirit guardians landed attacks on the drow group, but got Stote as well. We’ll take that trade as the drow started dropping like flies.
We broke for a minor discussion of crossed swords as Ron looked for the combat tracker.
The robed drow cast magic missile on Nadja for 4 missiles and , in addition to doing some damage, broke her spirit guardian concentration.
Tink, having located the combat tracker, also located a small piece of bone which she was able to use to pick her shackles. She immediately teleported in a direction away from combat.
The lone drow remaining was a bit pissed at Nadja and decided to take out his frustrations on her. However, the end result was even more frustration as he missed.
Another drow, surviving due to remote work rules, moved in to attack Ebon but now he’s frustrated too.
Ebon, cleaning up his targeting, focused on the armored drow. His reckless attack was not sufficient to offset his shitty rolling as he doubled ones that he rolled.
Tiras stepped out from behind his mushroom of safety and, adding his hunter’s mark to the mix was able to end the existence of the Armored Drow. He then went back into his mushroom cover.
Stote noticed a bunch of Troglodytes that weren’t actually there and then they disappeared.
The drow kept attacking Nadja and missed a bit and hit a bit.
Stote, tracking the source of the magic missiles that hit Nadja, attacked the robed drow. She’ll not be casting those magic missles any longer.
Nadja, feeling a bit rough, noticed her tormentor looking a bit worse for the wear, tried to end him, but was unable, even with inspiration. Her war priestess ability allowed her to miss again. Sorry Nadja.
Tink kept trying to finish getting her bonds undone. Failing that she again teleported a small distance.
Drow 5 attacked Ebon and did a little more damage after his partial resistance.
Ebon retaliated by hitting but rolling poorly for damage and not targeting, but he still killed the drow.
Tiras stepped out from behind his mushroom and ended the elite drow. Seeing some troglodytes entering the area, he killed one of them as well.
Ebon noticed that the troglodyte appeared to have been going to attack the drow, but he quickly switched his eye to Ebon. He was able to hit and did a small amount of damage with his sword.
Stote targeted one of the drow but found him a harder target until he was inspired to hit and kill one. He then called out, “Troglodytes, your overlords are dead. Leave or die.”.
Nadja, realizing that the troglodytes came from a different direction, called that out to Stote.
Tink tried to break her bonds again and again but failed. She teleported another 15′ away from combat.
One of the troglodytes munched on Ebon for a little damage.
Another hit Nadja for a bit as well.
Ebon continued to be the favored foe of the troglodytes and another hit him for a bit of damage.
Not to make her feel less favored, another hit Nadja as well.
Ebon wasn’t happy about all of the attention and decided to thin the room a bit. He killed two and then performed a celebratory axe swinging dance and finished with a wink to Nadja.
Tiras stepped out from behind his mushroom and ended two more. Things were looking grim for the troglodytes.
One dropped from Nadja’s spirit guardians.
Stote,lined up on one with his bow and then there were only three left.
Nadja and Ebon both passed their saves against Nadja, I mean nausea.
Nadja’s spirit guardians were still up and doing damage so the trogs will be dying.
Not soon enough though as they were able to take down both Ebon and Nadja.
Ebon had the barbarian relentless endurance that allowed him to recover and kill another trog. He then moved in (while Tiras missed) and killed the final target causing a rift in the space time continuum that gave Tiras back an arrow and his pride.
It appeared that the troglodyte’s smell didn’t die with them so we gathered around Nadja and Tiras fired up the staff of healing to bring the group back up a bit.
At this point Tink showed up without much gear and a lot of attitude, the conversation went a bit sideways and after Tink found out that she wouldn’t be able to escape as well as she thought, she decided to be more reasonable.
Now, on to the treasure. In addition to Tink’s stuff, there was the standard drow gear and some coins.
After a bit of haggling, we determined that Tink would have had a Heward’s Handy Haversack and a Ring of Protection +2.
In the rest of the haul was a wand (Arcane Focus) from the robed drow and a drow sword from the armored drow.
As we were about to divvy things up and go for a long rest, we decided to stop for the night.
See you next time.
2022-12-17 – Who gives a Tinker’s Damn
We begin with the party on their way to the alchemists room.
The combat tracker was reset, and a long rest was had by all.
A brief recap of the history of the dungeon and waterdeep in response to Ron’s questions/comments.
Stote started off the introductions by asking about her parties well being (ok, their best gear, but close enough for Stote)
Turned out that Tink had come down with her previous on a 100 GP bet (Gee bill, can you say side adventure in town?) Part of the conversation we had with Tink, seemed to be more ‘drow populous’ than our recollection. Anyway, her party was wiped and now we have her with us.
As we recounted our history, a Kuo Toa appeared to the south moving somewhat strangely. At the same time, a voice in all of our heads advised it was sorry it was unable to reign in its underlings (The troglodytes we ‘reigned in’ earlier). The voice introduced itself as Irawyn and indicated that the Kuo Toa was just a vessel. The voice went on to say the Duregar had the dagger and it could help us find it.
Tiras heard in his own head., ” Tiras, I can see your the most intelligent of your comrades and they look up to you for leadership and guidance.” He then said if I follow his guidance he would have information to help me in the future.
See the recording at 30 ish min.
After that, the voices stopped and the Kuo Toa wandered off.
Tink remained a bit abstinent but eventually gave a bit of background and offered information on how she might assist so we let her in on probationary terms and gave her back her gear.
We briefly rehashed the telepathic ramblings and what we had learned.
Tink investigated the room with a Lantern of Revealing and then, as we were leaving Tiras had her ‘splain it to us.
We decided to head off in the direction of the mental map the voice had provided …dunh duhn duhn.
As we followed Stote along the known path we moved somewhat stealthily. We learned a bit about Arcane Armor from Tink.
We stopped to discuss our course of action and decided to go after the Durgar first and then figure out what was up between the drow, Kuo-Toa and Abolith.
As we moved forward, Stote cautioned us to be as quiet as possible, we were all doin pretty well except Tink who needed to freshen her areas a bit and so she oiled up those areas.
As we moved forward Tink continued to squeak a bit in spite of the fresh lubrication.
Stote, being oh so perceptive, thought everyone was a bit squeaky, but he’s just persnickety that way.
We continued north.
Stote, the baker, used his mighty sack of flour to alert us to traps he encountered. These were tripwire traps.
Tink considered taking the trap after disarming them but found they were just set to trigger small rock slides as a form of alarm and so left them alone.
We came across the body of a drider which appeared to have been left here somewhat unceremoniously. There were signs of a battle as well as some broken Durgar axes on the ground which caused Nadja o salivate (oops, I meant spit on them)
Seeing (or hearing is more like it), that Tink was still having stealth issues, Nadja cast silence around us and we waited while Stote moved on ahead.
Ebon didn’t wait as long as expected and followed rather closely.
There were some giant spiders and a drider ahead and so….initiative
Tiras went first and, never having met a giant spider he liked, treated the one he could see like the others he’d met and attacked. His first attack missed but he was inspired to hit. He then attacked again, but this time sadly missed.
Stote finished off the spider and moved on to attack the drider and did a bit of damage.
Ebon charged in and recklessly attacked the drider and did some heavy damage.
Tink was going to cast a lightning bolt and attack everything in a straightlin with a lightning bolt, but can’t do that until the next level. Instead she used her glowing gauntlets came a caustic ooze which she cast towards both the drider and one of the spiders, but she missed. However, since it was a concentration effect she continued to spew.
Nadja moved up and cast a spiritual weapon on the drider but used a sword instead of the preferred mystic dildo. It appeared that Hela was displeased at this faux Pas as Nadja’s initial damage was to herself. We fixed that though and properly applied things to the Dryder. Finally, she tolled his death unsuccessfully.
The first drider responded with faerie fire and managed to get Tink. Stote wasn’t as lucky as he felt however as his second save failed as well and was ‘all fired up’.
The second drider focused on Ebon and did some damage with his longsword.
One of the giant spiders shot a web which hit Stote and restrained him. Pretty much the only way to restrain him.
Another giant spider bit Ebon and did a bi of damage.
Yet another one climbed up on the ceiling and shot his web of seduction at Tink. He missed.
Still another spider moved in to attack Tink and bit her. Fortunately, she only took half of the poison damage . Unfortunately, Ebon then had to take half damage as well as Bill reread the effects.
Back at the top of the order, Tiras took out the spider that had bitten Tink (and caused Bill to pass damage back to Ebon) . He then shot the drider for some more yummy damage but did not break his concentration.
Stote, still somewhat restrained, decided to free himself with a strength check, but failed. He felt luckier than that, but again was incorrect.
Check recording 2:30 – dad break + 14ish
Giant Spider 3 missed Ebon
Giant Spider 5 decided to web up Tink.
Tiras attacked Giant spider number 2 and after being inspired to hit with his first attack but rolling poor damage he hit with his second and ended the spider.
Recording again – Stote , Ebon, Tink
Nadja used her spiritual weapon to attack the drider and then …
The remaining driderbit Nadja for a bunch of damage but at least no poison. Then he attacked with his longsword as well but whiffed.
Giant Spider 3 bit Ebon again for a little more bite and poison damage.
Giant Spider 5 decided to drop on Tink, but missed him as well.
Tiras picked the next opponent in the room which was the drider and, even though he had gr8 concentration, scrappy armor class led to his death as Tiras hit twice and ended him.
Stote focused on cleaning up GS3 but fell just shy of the kill. He again called out ‘Finish Him!’ to Ebon.
Ebon did just that and ended GS3. He then charged over to GS5 and gave him a whack.
Tink, continuing her goo spew, attacked GS5 and jizzed it to death.
We then took a moment to look around the room. It was the typical spider/dryder layer (try to be inclusive Bill). There was a large archway in the south which had been partially cleared by Tink’s uncontrolled overspew.
As Tink took a closer look with her lantern, she noticed something written on the wall in a language she did not speak.
Nadja was able to read it as she spoke undercommon. It read “My Queen of Spiders, Dark diamond of the Abyss,Snare me in your web.”.
Carved into the archway were six figurines. A black Dragon, a Unicorn, an Umberhulk, an owlbear, a minotaur, and a manticore. Carved into the wall behind the archway was a mountain with a full moon depicted. There was a moonhole (no not that kind) but once Stote stuck the unicorn horn in the moonhole, it vanished and was replaced with the foggy curtain we know to be the passage to another level.
Stote told Ebon to charge through and off he went. The rest were right behind since, well, what else can we do. As we passed through, we heard chimes and a voice that was becoming familiar to us as Halaster, said “Dear Jhesiyra, you old bitch, I’m not going to have you foil my plans any more. “. in response the warm female voice we had heard before said “I have failed you adventurers. I hope you can survive what lies ahead.”.
Tink again looked at the archway but found no creatures in the six niches. The relief on this side was a similar mountain with a sun above it, but there was no sun hole.
We left it at wondering how we might get back….
2023-01-07 – Happy New Year – Bitches
We began the new year in unfamiliar territory having just passed through the portal of the moonhole 😉
As we glanced around the odd shaped room, we found a door to the north and the passage continued to the west.
Noticing that we had a bit of damage, we decided to consider how to heal. The options were short rest or Tink’s healing which involved ‘kissing it better’. She reached into her handy haversack and pulled out the wrench of healing.
While all of this was going on we heard (or some of us heard) an eerie screech. It seems to come from the west.
The decision was made to try the door to the north and we found a largish room that appeared to be some sort of dwarven lounge. There were two areas with sofas and seats and so we broke out the anker and had an ale and Tink went to search the couches for loose change, but only found an iron key under the bench.
We heard another ominous sound, much closer and seeming to come from a door to the east which Stote opened almost immediately. It did not seem to be anything we had ever heard before.
We headed to the east with Stote teasing Ebon from the ceiling. They turned north but Tiras headed a bit farther east to see if he could discern anything but did not.
Rejoining the party just in time for something that had been making the noise came out to greet Stote and Ebon.
Once again forgetting to call out anything to the group, it was initiative time.
Tiras won again, but in the confusion, only sort of half acted.
Stote them went and attacked, setting the tone for what was to come. He did a bit of damage and then called out to the rest of the group that he had softened it up a bit.
Tiras finished out his turn by attacking twice. His first needed inspiration, but then hit. His second hit as well and it seemed he was doing ok damage.
Tink stepped up and attacked with her armor’s ability to use thunder gauntlets.
Nadja moved into the hallway and Tiras began to be concerned about area of effect attacks. But Nadja tolled the dead pretty successfully so that the creature would be good and angry when it got to Ebon.
It never got to Ebon directly, but instead burrowed into the ground and tunneled under the party heading lower as it went.
Ebon, seeing it depart, checked the corner to the north.
Tiras dropped into the creature’s tunnel, but could not see enough to justify pursuit. (Besides, it was sort of dirty anyway. He began to climb out.
Nadja headed south to the room the creature had left and was chagrined to find that the creature had trashed a supply of dwarven ale.
Tiras cried out in dismay and tried to save Stote from suffering, but was unsuccessful. Stote William Defoe’d it and also cried out in anguish. As we departed, Tiras noted that there was an ‘entry hole’ in the north that the creature must have made. This hole immediately headed down. He headed back to join the party.
As we continued following the hall to the north and then east, we encountered a door to the south which Stote threw open immediately. This room had a broken stone desk as well as broken statues and diarrhea.
Leaving that room and heading north, we heard a scream that seemed male in nature again coming from the south.
Stote went allow shadow rogue and headed back towards the ale room on the ceiling. Catching sight of something dwarf-shaped, Stote rendered himself visible and greeted the being which turned out to be a female. This woman was consoling someone named Granite who was obviously upset about the lost ale.
After getting the party, we traded introductions and found the woman, Skella Ironeye (half Durgar half Shield Elf {based on Nadja’s observation})was leading a group of Duregar. We found they had been down here for about 2 years looking for art and artifacts to restore. Her group’s current target was a nearby temple of Dumathoin. Her latesxt attempts however had been foiled by some construct that was a guardian of the dais in the temple.
A bit of pointless haggling over a reward, we decided to head to the temple….
We met some additional Duergar. There was Little-guy, who was the biggest, and Onyx, who was pretty dark even for a duergar. Hulgar Ogre’s Breath and some (4) red shirts rounded out the group.
Closer inspection of the dias found 4 smashed Duregar corpses. There were also 4 10′ tall dwarven statues dressed in gold and purple robes and armor which looked very impressive.
Tiras, interested in the ceiling, stopped Bill in his tracks by looking up. After a bit of research we found that the ceiling was 70 feet above.
Tink moved forward on towards the dias but cast levitate to get 20′ into the air. Then…Initiative
As soon as Tink crossed the plane of the dias, a Clay Golem appeared somewhere nearby as we could hear it stomping about.
Hulger grew tremendously in size and Stote moved in and attacked. His hit with the first, missed with the second (even with his luck) and then hit with his third. He was thinking he had done some damage.
Tink then used her mage hand to move father forward and her boots to move farther still.
Nadja tried to toll his dead, but it had no effect.She then cast shield of faith on herself and then headed up the stairs. A grim set to her jaw as she drew her ax.
Granite moved forward and threw a Javelin with little effect.
The golem, rightfully pissed off, picked a random nearby target (Stote) and attacked. His slam attacks did some damage to Stote, but he missed a lot and Stote saved vs the golem effect, so it all worked out ok.
Little guy grew to twice his size and moved forward.
Tiras moved forward and caught the golem at the edge of his vision and attacked. He sucked ass with his first attack even with inspiration. His second hit however and so Tiras was somewhat satisfied.
Onyx moved into combat without growing and , well that’s it.
The red shirts surged, but little else.
Ebon moved in and recklessly attacked. So recklessly in fact that he missed twice. We then thought we had found a loophole that may change everything, but it turns out it didn’t.
Skella then rushed in and attacked with a war pick that, even though she seemed to hit, did no damage.
Hulgar also attacked with his big war pick and likewise did no damage.
Well, it’s back to Stote and he spent a moment activating his skills and again was lucky enough to miss anyway. His bonus attack also missed and so he sir robin’d the heck out of there.
Tink used her action to move further into the room and check the door for writings. She observed that the doors appeared to absorb all light, but she was able to make out some dwarven writing. She immediately called out to the room (full of Duergar and Nadja) “Hey, does anyone speak dwarvish?”.
Nadja, possibly motivated by Tink’s insensitivity, took a chop out of the golem with her axe.She then attacked again and critted that playdough bitch.
Doesn’t matter what Granite tries as he can’t do anything anyway.
The Golem, pissed off at Nadja, started slamming her for some pretty big damage and also causing her to lose 11 points of her max.
Little guy at least sounded good as he surged forward, but since he’s slow, he just moved twice.
Tiras opened his attacks by critting that golem and then attacked again for more damage.
A handful of duergar continued to do nothing and then it was Ebon’s turn.
Ebon recklessly attacked and he too jumped on the crit train and slew the beast. He didn’t let that stop him and he attacked its corpse as well.
There was a cheer from the duergar as the golem fell and then a second cheer as Ebon refrained from killing one of the duergar.
Apparently I can’t leave anymore since the conversation degraded to bad Hercules movies.
Tink then brought us back on point by asking if any of the duergar could read the dwarven runes.
Skella then thanked us for our help and presented us with an elven figure as a reward. This figure, when touched to the portal we came through, would open the return path.
When she was about to offer some of their other treasures, Tiras told a partial tail of Azrok’s dagger and, without much ado, Skella gave us that as well.
Tink, impatient to have the dwarven runes trasnlated, finally got someone to come over and read the runes. They said “It is the will of the Keeper of Secrets under the Mountain that only the hand of the king may open these doors. Let all who enter gaze upon the heart of Melairbode and know the true power of dwarvenkind.”
Nadja was able to recall some details about that King Haribo? and the tribe that dwelled under the mountain.
Ebon asked with real interest how the duergar had the ability to grow and they informed him that this was a gift from their god Ledugar. When Ebon asked if he could learn to do it, they said no.
Tink then dug into the clay golem to try to find the gem that might be its heart or focus. Tink managed to find a ruby somewhere in its innards.
Trying to use the gem to open the doors a very large fist appeared and we will get smacked around next week…..
2023-01-14 – What was Tink thinking
We join the group about to be fisted and rolled initiative…
Fortunately (unless she likes being fisted), the giant hand missed Tink. Hard to figure out how since the hand is bigger than she is.
Stote, not wanting to close with the hand, shot with an arrow and did good damage.
Tink then thunder gauntleted the hand (irony?) and took only a moment to fix Tink’s gauntlets and then get going for a tiny bit of damage.
Ebon, not liking when things reach out to touch the party, went in batting 500 and did some damage.
Now it was time for the band of the hand to retort. It did so for just a bit of damage.
Hulgar decided it was a good time to have a chat with Skella about why we were moving forward with working the door and didn’t just stop at the dias. Granite joined in and talked about beer and knives.
Nadja, still only having 1 HP, decided retreat was actually the best part of valor, moved behind a convenient pillar.
The red shirts moved up and that was about it because they were so small.
Little Guy turned out to be somewhat ‘Sheldon-esk’ and started talking about contractual agreements.
Tiras, planning on killing the hand, was unaware of its armored condition until his inspired second attack still missed.
Onyx and Skella both attacked but only Onyx did anything.
We came back around to the top of the order and Tink surged in and gauntleted the hand (no Irony yet) for 2 whole points of damage.
Ebon moved in and, after un-targeting Tink, critted the fist and made it disappear.
After some discussion about king’s hands and nearby tombs and divvying up treasure, Tink went with the bad acting option of trying to fake a sneeze and push Skella into the door. Playing it off with some weak lezbo lines. During this pause, Tiras recovered 2 arrows.
We then had a short rest and recovered some hit die. Skella offered 1,000 GP for our assistance. Tiras agreed and Little Guy capitulated on the writing part.
Granit, Onyx, Hulgar and 2 red shirts (5,7) joined the party in heading out to the west.
We ended up in a room where 6 glowing pillars provided sufficient light to see the floor was strewn with broken armor and weapons enough to make the footing rough terrain. In the alcove to the north was a shattered stone sarcophagus. On the wall above the sarcophagus. was the phrase (That Nadja translated) “Our king is with the gods. Here lie his bones.”
Looking into the sarcophagus, we saw that there were bones and Stote pulled out a hand and tossed it to Onyx who caught it in a manner similar to how you might catch a wet cat. He handed it off quickly to a red shirt (7).
After some poking through the sarcophagus and figuring out that the corpse had been rifled, we decided to check around to see if we might be overlooking treasure. Nadja’s wand of secrets, activated in the middle of the room, began to indicate a secret door to the south. Very little searching found the mechanism to open a secret door to the south.
Stote immediately opened the door and, with little ado, he moved into the room and melted into the darkness.
The room had a 10′ high vaulted ceiling ( hey it’s a dwarven room). {Check video @ 1:50-ish} and there was a black marble? sarcophagus with a dwarven king carved into the lid. Tink’s lantern lit it well, but her ability to understand some lore revealed nothing. There were 10 glittering panels, 6’x3’x1″ of golden crystal, each carved with the bas relief of a dwarven warrior holding a battle axe.
Tink’s random knowledge seemed to give her the indication that this might be the tomb of a Malarkain king. Tiras and Nadja took interest in the crystal panels to no avail. They seemed heavy and well secured. If we took the panels down they might be worth 500 GP each, undamaged.
Tiras then became interested in the south wall as there was a gap between the crystal panels there. Stote made a quick check for secret doors but found none.
Having few other options, we focused on the coffin (yeah, that’s right, I’m tired of typing sarcophagus), Tink moved in with a crowbar and was unable to open it, Tiras gave Ebon the nod to help but also counseled the use of Nadja’s wand of secrets before opening the coffin. The wand glowed and pointed right at the coffin! That is, until Nadja moved a bit at which point it seemed to point past it to the south wall where Stote had checked before.
While Nadja and Stote checked the South wall Tink continued trying to open the coffin, unsuccessfully. Tiras offered to help ‘do the right thing’. As Tiras moved Tink away from the coffin, 5&7 moved in to open the coffin as they were confused as to what was going on. As the lid moved a voice cried out “You dishonor our beloved king! May his tomb become yours as well!”. The battle axes that were embedded in the crystal panels all flew off the wall and …initiative.
Stote moved into the new hall to the south and onto the ceiling. He still had to crouch as the ceiling was only 5′ high and he is 5’6″. He then attacked and…missed.
Tink then moved to a spot where she could teleport into the hallway. She began charging her gauntlets and created a shatter spell centered on herself. 3 battle axes, Ebon, and #7 were all in the radius and all took damage.
Duergar 5 attacked and did minimal damage.
Duergar 7 cried out in surprise and alarm and attacked. Hitting and killing one o0f the axes.
The axes whiffed around the room until they got to Onyx and Tiras and then they did ok. Durgar 5 took a crit, but seemed ok. Hulgar took some damage as well.
Finally getting back to Nadja (who had quietly gotten her divine powers back during the short rest, she kicked ass on axe 36 with divine strike.
Tiras killed both axes near him with his flaming sword.
Ebon, unable to determine where his damage had come from, focused on clearing the room by attacking his axes. Even batting 500 and rolling minimum damage, he took out one of them.
Stote moved back into the room and attacked an axe. His damage together with Sneak Attack vaporized the axe. He then crossed the room and whiffed like he was an axe rather than attacking one.
Tink put her hands together and made the p-choo, p-choo, p-choo noise as she MM’d Axe 7.
The duregar went and after sorting out some targeting, the axes were damaged a bit more.
The axes retaliated but didn’t doing anything spectacular
Nadja, trying to save a piece of ass, stepped in and killed one of the axes nearher (and Number 5)
Tiras, trying to save Nadja a piece of ass, moved down and took out the other in their area.
Ebon moved north and took out the last two …. recklessly.
The Duregar, led by Onyx, took a rest while Ebon opened the coffin and Tiras returned Tink’s very useful crowbar.
The coffin held the bones of a dwarf draped in a black cloth with the bones of some small animal inside as well. We took a moment to try to figure out what the small creature was and Tiras thought it might be a mole and Stote agreed adding that it must have been a Dire Mole.
We took both of the hands and gave them to duergar 7 for his collection.
We moved into the hallway beyond and Tink ascertained that 30# wouldn’t trigger any traps. Stoite checked the door and found none. Since Tink was confident there were no traps, Stote let her go first…right into a trap. Fortunately, Tink was light enough that there was a chance she might avoid the danger, which she did. Rolling forward, she and Stote were able to observe the floor slowly closing behind her.
Knowing where the trap is, made it easy to avoid and then, after a bit of debate, figured out how to permanently disable the trap so it could not be opened again.
We were able to move beyond the trap to the dead end which we did not believe for a minute. And a minute is about all it took to find a secret door at the end of the hall.
We sprung it open and …… will find out next week.
2023-02-18 Where was I last week?
Finding ourselves back in the portal chamber on level 4 and having easily dispatched the troglodytes, we quickly realized that the room had changed drastically.
Gone were the webs that had been there before and in their place was a putrid goo coating everything, even the ceiling.
Almost as quickly as Tink could capture some of the jizz, our old friend Illiwin (look up) was back talking in our heads. It requested the return of ‘the favor’ we ‘owed’ for the directions given earlier, notwithstanding the traps.
(Illiwin) indicated that there was a group of mixed racists that had entered the area and now refused to leave. After a bit of recollection of the debt owed, and not having $3.27, we decided to help and went to check things out.
(Illiwym) made this a bit easier by providing mental images of the path. As we made our way, we were met by many creatures who were seemingly wandering aimlessly, but they got out of our way and so we proceeded.
Following the images provided by the disembodied voice (sort of a medieval Siri), we entered a room where a watchpost may have been. All that remained of the previous watchers were decomposing skeletal remains of a group.
Nadja quickly spotted a glint which turned out to be a brooch and the rest of us thought, hmm, treasure, maybe we should poke around.
As we investigated, Tink was able to determine that the deaths may have occurred some time ago, but the slime was aiding in the decomposition.
Stote started to get nervous and wanted to head out, but the voice reassured us that the slime was necessary as it helped with communication. With that spotty reassurance, we continued on into a room to the north where a decomposing desk held a brassier in the shape of a spider and a couple chests.
Stote took one and Tink the other and these yielded 500G and some obsidian bracers. There was also an obsidian statue of (religion check please) Loth queen of the demon web pits.
Meanwhile, Ebon, going south on his own, and Bill, not wanting to split the party, discussed a useless piece of paper which was right next to 25 PP and another useless thing which may have been a book.
The noted ‘stuff in the wall’ turned out to be nutin’ honey.
As Ebon showed it to Stote the haul, the rest of the party moved into the room and noticed another archway, this with a slot in it. Tink immediately urged Ebon to try a platinum piece which, after a slight humming sound, disappeared and did nothing else. A copper had the same result. Nadja handed Ebon a gold just as Stote found another scarab and that was the coin that did the trick.
Ebon and Nadja went through; Ebon to the sign of a glyph in the portal. Seeing that the way was clear, Tiras followed after Nadja calling over his shoulder to Tink and Stote to follow.
As Tink went through, she cried out “I’m Burning, I’m Burning” and Stote was somewhat nonplussed. Tiras tried to get Ebon to extinguish her, to no avail.
As soon as the party was re-assembled, we noticed two goblins to the South who gave Tink the stink eye, but then recognized the rest of the party as the chosen of Maglubiyet and they calmed down after mentioning we had gotten rid of the cursed one (that goblin with the helm/mask/ thing that made him look human.
As words were exchanged, chief among them Ebon reassuring the goblins that they were correct in their thinking that they would do us no harm.
Even though they seemed to know us, these goblins seemed unfamiliar.
Nadja struck up a conversation by asking how their tribe had been doing since the removal of the cursed one. They answered that the Rustbone tribe had done well now that there were less threats since that Xanathar and his braindogs had left this level alone. They now occupy most of this area. The henchmen had been less of an issue.
Tiras, soooo relieved to hear the latest news, simply asked them for the way out. They began to lead the way to the stairs, with Tink taking some additional notes of the rooms as we went through them. As we moved closer to the stairs to level one and recalled more of our surroundings. We also began to encounter more goblins with various crafting areas set up. They had gone from surviving to thriving.
As we made our way out, Tiras advised Tink of some of the adventures we had had along the way and the Xanathar henchmen and other foes we had killed. Tink did a bit of wandering on her own as well.
After we got to the stairs, the first level was little trouble and soon we were back at the portal.
As we arrived, there was significant surprise on the faces of the patrons as it may have been a bit longer here than it had been below. The date today was 30th Myrtl, 1494 a full two years after we left.
This was further evidenced by the ‘in memorium’ upstairs had our entry date of 28 Flamerule 1492.
It appeared that Aquilonia had sold her title, Trollskull had become a bed and breakfast and all wasn’t right with the world.
Tink managed to find the guy who had bet her that she couldn’t go down into the dungeon and come back. When she went to collect however, the guy balked until Ebon joined behind Tink and added to the intimidation. As he was paying out, he mumbled something about the bet only being 10, but he paid the 100 nonetheless.
After that we headed to Trollskull, and found it in ok shape but managed by a man and his family. He introduced himself as Courtense and explained how the Greyfall family had been tasked with managing the property indirectly with Courtense and his family managing directly.
After some bickering we decided to ….. find out next week.
P.S. But then we sent a couple messages via Nadja to Stote’s folks and Aquilonia. Stote’s folks are fine and back in Oakhurst.
Aquilonia did not answer.
2023-03-04 – What Job? – Maybe a farmhand in Amphail
1 Kytorn 1494 DR – Firday – TrollTide
As my unemployment continues, we rejoin our party at Trollskull with absolutely no reason to be concerned about where Tink would stay. While we were still being amazed at her disappearance, Aquilonia’s reply came through:
“The wolf protects love’s embrace, canaries, rats waiting, watching, and whispering, time for butterflies to transform, dive down to the shadows and follow the magic.”
Now that that’s all cleared up, we decided to let Coutense get back to sleep and we went up to our rooms and slept until the sound of children (and more so their parent’s shushing them) rudely awakened us. As we went down for breakfast, we were not too chagrined to find Tink had departed in the middle of the night, possibly not wanting to share the 100 gold she had gotten from her wager.
More chagrining was the distinct lack of the smell of bacon replaced only with the smell of cream of meat. After finding out that we weren’t going to get any bacon by order of the departed Aquilonia who had commanded no bacon lest it could be construed that the Baconeer’s had returned.
While the rest of the party partook of the apple gruel, the fruit and gruel lover’s gruel, Ebon decided to try to noodle out the puzzle and was able to determine that the “canaries, rats waiting, watching, and whispering,” represented good people (canaries) and bad people ‘rats’ who were whispering watching and waiting.
Tiras’ attempts to get Stote to help him convince Ebon that “time for butterflies to transform ” meant that Ebon should disguise himself as a female was impaired by Steve’s need to be in NY instead of at the table 🙂
We tried to figure out who we might contact as a ‘canary’. From Quilem, the mage friend from the tower; to Jeoffrey, her butler; until we finally settled on Quillem first and then Bogtru with a quick stop by Riataur’s Weaponry to see what Roni thinks of a two year absence.
The tower of the order was located in the middle of the street of balls and poked up just above buckle alley. We were able to find it easily with the purple ping.
We were able to easily locate Quillem who was amazed by Ebon’s size and pleased to see Nadja as well. A bit of discussion was not helping us much as Quillem didn’t possess a scrying ball and got a bit shifty when we asked if anyone else did. He played it a bit coy as he was worried that our reasons might be somewhat nefarious.
Nadja explained the portals and the passage of time and Quillem seemed to lighten a bit but still didn’t get us any scrying time.
After some discussion, it was suggested that we might try a temple or other option for the scrying spell. We thought of the Holyhands House where we had tried to get Ebon raised but they had demurred due to his half-orcedness.
We did turn over Tarissa’s spell book and debated for sometime the origin and nature of some of our wands, but eventually paid the 200 gold and decided not to fill in the waiver for future identify spells. A final attempt to prize some info out of Bill through Quillem regarding the cryptic note from Aquilonia, but that proved fruitless as well.
Ebon threw a “better not be a rat” warning to Quillem and left. The rest of us (except Nadja) followed soon after, and it was off to Riautar’s to see if Roni was about.
The disinterested shop attendant was able to confirm that this was still owned by the Riautar’s but Roni was not in. Instead she was tending to Troll Tide activities elsewhere and nursing the newborn. A bit of fishing and Tiras was able to determine it was the sister’s kid, not Roni’s. After learning that she might be in or out at any time, they were off to pick up Bogtru.
We headed South to the dock ward, with Stote watching as he had been to make sure we weren’t being followed.
When we arrived where we had left Bogtru (With Veronica and Silus) and found that the place looked somewhat different. The barn had been rebuilt and some other improvements made. A knock at the door brought Veronica, who after a bit of terror in our sudden appearance, called Silas who was a bit too abrupt in his description of Bogtru’s absence. Bogtru had eaten his horse and wrecked his house and something bad had happened. Silas is an idiot and Veronica has some sense, so they jumped to the end and advised that Durnan had stopped by and taken Bogtru off their hands. Ebon then asked how much the damages had cost and Veronica answered that Durnan had paid for things and the couple had used the money to rebuild the barn. Ebon, as perceptive as always, tossed them a bag with 83G and headed off to the YP. Stote assured them that this was for their troubles and we all followed suit.
When we arrived at the portal, we found Nadja already there (apparently Quillem’s pickle wasn’t that big). Ebon immediately called out to Dash (the alias of the young day attendant of the portal) to get Durnan. Dash followed his namesake and scrambled into the kitchen from whence Durnan emerged. Ebon immediately charged across the bar with the intent of a thankful hug (barbarian run + grapple) and so…it was initiative?
Ebon was victorious in the initial grapple and Ebon followed up his first attack with profuse thanks. Durnan explained that while it was partially his fault, Ebon shouldn’t be too quick to thank him as he had given the unruly beast to his friend, a ranger named Derrick Greystone. It seemed that no amount of animal handling potions were able to calm Bogtru enough for Durnan to handle him and something had to be done.
Derrick could be found in a town to the north, Amphail, where Derrick was investigating the disappearance of some horses.
Nadja recalled Amphail as the city where the Sandhor family had a farm, so we got Ebon to stay for two rounds and then we were on our way. Durnan pointed us to the Gentle Rest stables near the Court of the White Bull a bit East of the YP on Deloun Alley.
After a bit of haggling we settled on 4 horses for 160 with tack and harness came to 170 and then the feed brought it to 170.6. Stote paid the 170 and Tiras covered the .6.
After some basic conversation with the guard we were on our way to Amphail to find Bogtru.
We arrived quickly and without incident and checked into the Amphail Inn. We headed down to the tavern and asked the bartender about the ranger Greystone who had come to town to investigate the disappearing horses. He advised us to head over past Mother Girthalls and we might find the ranger there if he hadn’t left yet. He was camping out of town as his ‘dog’ might have caused too much trouble in town.
Since it was an Inn, Nadja ordered a round of Amphail Ale, a sweet smelling reddish brew that Nadja dropped a gold for (The bartender turned and bit it)and we were on our way. It didn’t take long to find the campsite as we could see the fire from a ways away. As we got closer we could hear the sounds of sniffing and snapping of a large creature. We heard a voice say Bogtru heel.
Ebon continued forward and called Bogtru to come. This was answered by some whining and Ebon took a knee and Bogtru came over and began licking Ebon’s face and Ebon responded by giving Bogtru scritches.
Stote indicated that the dog was Ebon’s and Derrick, getting over his initial fear of Bogtru eating Ebon, discussed with the rest of the group the nature of the relationship as Ebon and Bogtru continued licking and fondling each other.
Ebon and Derrick discussed the history of Bogtru and where Ebon called home and Derrick invited us to share some stew and we shared our ale with him. Ebon then shared some of our tales and adventures and then then….it was decision time.
Derrick made his case for keeping Bogtru and identified to Tiras that Bogtru might be a mix of Direwolf and some fey creature. Ebon was adamant that Bogtru should come with him. Both agreed that Bogtru should decide.
Derrick then made a bid for Stote’s cloak in exchange for his time in raising Bogtru. That went over like a lead balloon.
Derrick then taught Ebon how to play ‘Bogtru Flute’ to help calm him down if he got too flustered.
It was decided that Ebon would need to stay in AmPhail and, when Stote’s role said he would stay as well, we decided to stop and give Bill the week to prepare.
2023-03-11 Amphail is farther than we thought
4 Kythorn 1494 DR – With some corrections to distance and time made for Google maps we started again in Derrick’s camp in Amphail (3 days from Waterdeep not just a couple hours). We recapped a bit and ….
Noticing that we were a bit sore from the saddle, Tiras used the staff of healing to apply lesser restoration to each party member (8 charges)
Deciding to leave Ebon on his own with Derrick (the lone ranger) and Bogtru at the camp, the rest of the group headed back towards the Amphail Inn. As they departed, Nadja mentioned Mother Gothal’s and Derrick advised that that place was always jumpin’ but the whole town would be alive with a celebration for the Rowan Tree.
Excited to be going back to the Inn (Stote), we could hear laughter and music from MGs. Stote headed that way immediately. As he approached, a man with a woman on his arm was sprinting to the South East, her is a diaphanous gown and him impaired by his third leg.
As we entered the establishment, Stote got right to the bar while Tiras and Nadja took in the sites. There was a player with a many-stringed lute (dulcimer?) while some scantily clad dancers scampered about.
The woman at the bar explained that the girls were 4g, Mead was 1c, and things could be stored below without worry. Since she didn’t offer initially, Tiras asked her name and she answered Cesily. When she asked for Tiras name, he fell back on his Name alias. She then advised a large muscular woman-warrior (Dlara) at the end of the bar that everything was fine.
Stote bought a round for the group and everyone on stage and, after noticing her, Dlara as well.
The room had many divans around where more personal entertainment was going on.
As Stote checked for purse snatching, a young woman approached Nadja and admired her muscles and her axe. A tawny beauty from the deep South (Chult) approached Tiras.
Stote seemed to find the place on the up-and-up with Dlara declining the mead Stote had sent.
As Stote mentioned Aquilonia, Tawny (both in name and appearance, reacted to see if Tiras was spoken for, which he indicated, not at this moment.
Stote then elaborated asking after Aquilonia and Cesily perked up indicating this was not really her kind of place. Upon further questioning, Cesily revealed that she hadn’t seen Aquilonia in 2 to 3 years.
With that settled, Stote began to scan the room for an elf maiden with some crazy in there eyes and was rewarded with several.
Dlara then walked over with the mead, thanked Stote for his generosity, and added the warning that Cesily should have given in that there would be no violence of any kind. It was obvious when she spoke that she was older that she appeared under the helm she wore.
When the music ended, the smattering of applause indicated that the crowd was here for other entertainment. A few of the patrons that were not paired off, seemed to be a bit seedy and shun the light of the well placed candles, watching the room with various looks.
Duzna Mater, the girl who had admired Nadja, received 2 platinum for the evening and told her to find a friend.
Stote did similar for one of the elven maids. When he paid Cesily, she apologized for Dlara’s brunt approach and reminded him not to hurt the girls. She slid back the change which Stote used to buy 3 bottles of wine.
Nadja and Stote dropped their gear in the BOH. Stote kept a dagger and Nadja had Cesily store her axe ‘downstairs’. The group then headed off to the ‘Stone Stallion’, the inn specifically affiliated with MGs. Tiras just of a room and the others for…
Arriving at the Stallion, the place was deserted. Duzna was going to fill out the ledger, but rang the bell instead. The clerk shrugged off his sleep and came out to greet us and arrange for rooms with baths and meals and, after escorting us to the fourth floor and showing us to our rooms.
It seemed like a fine clean inn. Very large and meant for mostly one thing.
Nadja was satisfied as her partners were generous. Stote’s partner was nice but made him long for Kal’El who had a bit more of the crazy that he liked (or had liked since Kal ‘Al).
Tiras secured his room and made to sleep. After round two, Stote did two.
When morning came, there was a knock and Tiras made the room ready. He was greeted by two young ladies. One who drew the bath and the other who served the disappointing meal and some water. **Insert list of beverages here 1:12-ish**
The rounds continued to Stote and Nadja with Stote selecting the Ale and Nadja, wrapped in a towel, selected all of the above. As the girls departed to Nadja’s wave, her towel slipped to the floor as the door closed.
Ebon continued to learn how to try to manage Bogtru, but only Brandi and Bill know if it’s successful.
As Tiras finished cleaning himself and his clothes, Stote arrived and after knocking and they both finished gearing up as Nadja arrived and did the same.
As they made their way downstairs, they were greeted with the sounds of the Festival of RowanTree. To the south, a large statue of a mounted horseman was painted and festooned for the celebration as well.
Cesily was surprised that arrived as early as we had but was quick to fetch Nadja’s axe.
We decided to check out the shops and by this time a woman was singing about the Rowan Tree while a skit unfolded on the stage showing a cripple climbing the tree and being healed as he slept.
Blodhlar’s wares was a dud, but (Akrosz) Ulvinhand however was a quality smith and Nadja purchased a longsword with a silvered blade for 200G. Tiras was also able to refresh the arrows for 1G a score (Got 3)
Elboar’s finest supplied us with 5 bottles of common wine.
Then it was off to Shrunedalar’s Secrets to the sound of bagpipes from the square. It was a women’s wear store so we passed on buying.
Pelost’s woodworking had fine furniture but nothing for us.
Halana Shauluth’s Bakery was fairly picked over due to the festivities, but Stote bought some for later with Ebon. Nadja and Stote both noticed her hands bore the calluses of a warrior and she returned the observation by asking if we were just in town for the festival or there to help the ranger with the ‘Barghests’. She gave a brief background of the doglike beasts which might be able to change shapes, but was no longer adventuring herself. She also sold darkwheat loaves for 2 Nib each. Tiras bought 10 and Stote 6.
When we finally got to the tree the first thing we noted, other than its massive size, was the sine that said, “Chop not, lest ye be chopped.”.
Ammakyl’s Flowers and Food, a store renowned for supplying Waterdeep with many of their products, yielded nothing as we didn’t go in there.
The final stop, Imbryl’s Cloaks, would have been a fine place to buy more attire and Tiras made a note of it for the future. We did get directions to the Sandor Farm which was also known as Dwight Manor. She asked if we could find out when they would start growing cotton again as other sources were too expensive.
Since it was past the ranger’s campsite, we would stop there first to see how Ebon was getting on with Bogtru and Derrick.
Ebon was really struggling with the commands Derrick had used to train Bogtru. When we offered Ebon the break of going to the Sandhor place he declined, preferring to continue training with Bogtru.
As we approached the farm/manor, we saw the fields lie fallow. Some livestock was at the intersection near a silo and we noted this as we continued north to the manor.
We approached from the east and even though we could tell the proper entrance was to the South we didn’t stand on ceremony or the porch and instead Stote picked the lock and in we went. We hadn’t gone far when someone in the ha;; called out “Intruders!”. The respondent came and said “I’m no soldier, but I do know how to use a weapon.”. Tiras replied “I am a soldier and do know how to use a weapon. We are friends of Aquilonia and are seeking information.” When the new host seemed skeptical and asked how we knew her, Tiras advised “We’re the Trollskull Baconeers”.
At that he led us to the main hall which was fairly ornate. A woman joined us and introduced herself as Norma and the man who accompanied us as Benny. They were the husband and wife caretakers of the manor. They demanded more proof and Nadja suggested Tiras show them the Trollskull deed.
This added some weight to our argument and was sufficient so that Nadja could cast a zone of truth and help us get to the bottom of things. After a bit of haggling on how this would work we had each of them try to lie and that was enough to set things in motion.
After a bit of back and forth, we found out that neither of them had seen Aquilonia for about two years when Alyra (AQ’s mother) had come out with her. Aquilonia had left shortly thereafter and Norma assumed it was to go back to Waterdeep.
Norma told us that before she departed that Alyra had told Benny and Norma to let the fields go fallow and live off the grain stores for now.
Tiras said, perhaps we need to “dive down to the shadows and follow the magic” and gave a knowing look to the group.
When Stote implored Nadja to try messaging and she did detect creatures instead, but to no avail.
While she was casting, another person joined us. He was a bit dirty and introduced himself as Levon, the handyman. Since all he had to care for now was Benny and Norma Jean Peachtree, Nikita, and Suzy, Daniel, and his son, Jesus. And some others that will not be named. He confirmed what everyone else had said and also wanted to confirm who we were as well.
Since we were already in the dining room, we decided to join them for lunch. While we were dining, Nadja began to feel anxious about not being back in the dungeon. Tiras explained that we needed to wait for Ebon to make his decision and then we would return to the dungeon.
This seemed to calm Nadja a bit and she asked for a few more cakes.
Norma Jean sent Levon to tend the horses and set us up with feed.
Tiras let the Peachtree’s know that we’d be moving on to Waterdeep again once our comrade’s business was concluded. He left a message with them that we could be found in Waterdeep and that Mirt, Durnan, Dash, and Quilem would all know our whereabouts and that Aquilonia would know all of these people.
Nadja then talked Stote into going to the bathroom which Norma led him to.
When he returned, cleared, but somewhat confused.
At that point, we were about ready to head after Ebon when the whole cast of Rocket Man showed up armed and ready to find out if they would be ‘Better Off Dead’
We rolled initiative and then …..
Will the EJ crew best the Baconeers? Will Ebon ever play Bogtru’s flute correctly, will we ever figure out the riddle? The answer to these and more will be discovered on the next exciting episode of – The Comedy Legends.
2023-03-18 Now to battle
5 Kythorn 1494 DR – we’re getting ready to kill everything Elton John ever wrote…
First, we went back a bit to refresh Ebon’s memory of what had happened. Derrick had been so excited about the company that he pitched a tent for Ebon.
Ebon, having none of that, slept under the stars instead. He awoke to a plate of berries, eggs, and stale bread.
Sharing his water, instead of ale, Derrick explained that all of his years of living alone had made him a bad host. This softened Ebon’s frown a bit and Derrick went on to explain that he had some past challenges with ‘the drink’.
Ebon explained that he needed the Bahgtru situation to work, somewhat regardless of what the party might think. Derrick searched his face for the truth of it and assured Ebon that he would do everything he could to give Ebon the skills h3e would need so that Bohgtru might choose Ebon over Derrick.
Derrick dug deeper into the training and explained that Bahgtru could understand many words in several languages which would make verbal commands easier to use but added that tone of voice was more important.
He then launched into an example “von kess”. Bahgtru seemed disinterested at first until Derrick added something Ebon didn’t understand and then restated “Von Kess”.
At this Bahgtru let out a blast of air onto a nearby bush which was suddenly encased in ice. A handy trick for future reference.
Aws the day progressed, it was obvious that this was going to be more challenging as Ebon was more of a ‘buddy’ to Bahgtru than a ‘master’ of him. Many of his attempts to command resulted in Bohgtru wanting to roughhouse and play with Ebon rather than respond to his commands.
It quickly became clear to Ebon that he would need to be firmer with Bahgtru. Foraging for lunch gave him more opportunity.
The foraging was successful. As they dined Ebon regaled Derrick with the history of the meeting of Bahgtru and some of the background of the group as well as the search for Aquilonia.
Back at the ranch (Dixon Manor)
Bennie leaned towards Nadja and said “quiet” and there was silence.
Tiny pointed something at Stote (he noticed) and he felt an odd feeling throughout his body.
Suzy looked towards Tiras and he too felt an odd sensation but little else.
Tiras heard the sound of boots coming down the hall
Little Jeannie attacked Stote with an open hand and did 4 damage.
Nikita attacked Tiras with her open hands and did some good damage but failed to knock Tiras back.
Tiny again tried to use her chian/skull dealy and Stote might have failed, but, as luck would have it, he saved.
Tiras started slicing on Norma Jean and hit twice, not killing. Action Surge and Inspiration let him hit twice more, but shitty damage dice made sure she survived.
Nadja gave Suzy the chop on Suzy and used her battle priestess to attack again. With her wargods blessing she hit again. She then tried to jump onto the table but Bill used his bump mod on her dice and so she fell prone.
Stote disengaged and ran up the wall until he was looming over Suzy. He fired down on her with his bow and ended that biatches life. (I remember when Stote …)
A bugbear came in from the hall, jumped up on the table and missed Tiras with a javelin.
Bennie moved over by Nadja and attacked three times with his rapier. He hit twice and did some damage.
Norma Jean attacked Tiras with her Dagger and hit twice out of three times.
Reg, the weird looking houseboy, pointed something at Stote and would have paralyzed him, but as luck would have it, he did anyway. Some debate later and Stote did not fall from the ceiling.
As Suzy’s Turn would have come, an Intellect Devourer popped out of her head instead.
Back at camp, Derrick had moved on to the discussion of hand signals. As he worked with Ebon, Ebon tried to use the “von kess” on another bush and was rewarded with Bahgtru’s weight on him as the animal covered him with ‘kisses’.
As this unfolded, Ebon felt the anxiety of the dungeon pulling at him. Derrick was able to note this distraction and explained that his friend Durnan profited from this feeling in others and that the farther we went into the dungeon the stronger this pull would become. There was some discussion of Halaster and the denizens of the dungeon as well as the best preparation for fighting the anxiety is to know its source.
As they enjoyed the evening meal, Derrick carved something on the far side of the fire as a gaggle of geese flew overhead and caused Ebon to remark on the peacefulness of the scene.
The chill crips breeze ruffled the nearby trees and caused Ebon to think fondly of home. He glanced towards Derrick’s carving and saw only a block of dark wood about the size of Ebons’s hand.
Rather than comment on the carving, Ebon asked Derrick if he might range a bit at night with Bahgtru to see if he could improve his firmness.
Somewhere Aquilonia heard a knock at the door. She called out come in, and a familiar face said “I have information for you” .
“Out with it”
“I’ve been told that your friends, the Baconeers, have been spotted, alive and well.”
“Thank you”
“Milady, have I offended you? Are you not excited to hear about your friends?”
“My feelings are of know concern to you”
“My lady, are you sure I haven’t offended you?”
“I am sure. You may go”
Curtly “Thank you my lady”
Back to the ranch – a bugbear came through the door behind Tiras and attacked for a bit of damage. His partner joined and missed.
Tiras took a swing at a third bugbear crept by, but missed.
Bugbears kept pouring in, but were missing a bunch.
Back at the top of the order, Little Jeannie, seeing Stote immobilized, held her attack.
Nikita continued her efforts against Tiras using her open palm. Hitting once and knocking him prone.
As Tiny moved to a better position to attack Tiras, Nadja hit her with a great axe for minimal damage. That didn’t stop her from using her wand to paralyze him.
Tiras, of course, failed his saving throw and remained paralyzed.
The rest of the baddies moved about the room.
Nadja was unable to hit anything until she used her inspiration to try again and then she still missed.
Stote, feeling lucky, was able to cast off his paralysis. He held in place.
The bugbear chief let out a cheer and held his action.
Bennie continued his attack on Nadja but missed all three times.
Norma Jean put something on Tiras’ right wrist and right leg and disarmed him.
Reg held his action.
The intellect devourer entered Xanathar thug 2
Meanwhile, back at camp, Ebon and Bahgtru were out foraging. Ebon’s attempt to “von kess”with Bahgtru went swimmingly and another bush was frozen to death. Ebon worked hard to contain his excitement and immediately gave Bahgtru the command to stay and then the command to move on patrol. This didn’t go as well, but at least he didn’t do anything akward. Ebon alerted him to some disappointment but they continued their rounds.
Back at the manor, they continued stripping Tiras of his armor.
Other bugbears teamed up on Nadja and while the first one missed, the second critted doing heavy damage.
Little Jeannie hit Nadja once for a bit more damage.
Tiras was able to throw off his paralysis but was shackled with something so he held his action.
Xanather thug 1 jumped up to grab Stote but failed.
XT2 hit Stote with a spear for a tiny bit of damage.
XT3 & 4 awaited orders.
Nadja got pissed at the bugbears and attacked BB5 and killded him. She then missed BB2
Stote moved across the wall towards the door and as he moved past Little Jeannie, she used the opportunity to try to attack Stote but missed. He kept on going down the hall to escape. He ran upstairs and almost made it to the top floor.
The bugbear chief pointed out that Tiras was moving and so they put more manacles on him cuz apparently these things are a dime a dozen.
Bennie hit Nadja for way more than he should have but even with the correction she was still unconscious.
Meanwhile, back at camp, Derrick made a dinner of rabbit (caught b his falcon Spotter) and walnuts. As they finished their meal a chilly rain began to fall forcing Ebon into the tent. As the night progressed, the rain turned to a downpour. Bahgtru decided to tent in with Derrick. As the ‘dis’ unfolded, Ebon gave Bahgtru the command to ‘follow that one’ in a lame attempt to make it seem less painful.
Back at the manor, Reg followed Stote and paralyzed him even though he used inspiration.
The huge group of bad guys started stripping Nadja as well.
The others were stripping Stote of his gear as well.
Blah Blah Blah, Yak Yak Yak
Nadja failed her first death save.
Stote threw off his paralyzation and then tried to get past the bugbear blocking the door and needed to be inspired to get by. He then moved away as fast as possible. Missing his cloak and bow.
Blah blah blah yak yak yak Manacles on Nadja.
Blah blah blah yak yak yak Tiras in a coffin.
Stote made his way outside and started using cover. Levon followed and was able to see him and paralyzed him again.
Blah blah blah yak yak yak closing in on Stote.
Derrick and Ebon are asleep (They have already lived this day).
Blah blah blah yak yak yak
Stote broke his paralysis and moved well away from the group.
Blah blah blah yak yak yak Bennie healed Nadja
Blah blah blah yak yak yak Nadja in a box
Blah blah blah yak yak yak Tiras getting carried somewhere
We’ll see what happens to Stote next week.
2023-03-25 Well, we’re all in boxes now, what’s next?
Since Nadja and Tiras really can’t do anything anyway, we start off with Stote, even though it’s technically Bahgtru’s turn.
Jeezus and Levon caught up to Stote riding one of our horses.
Jeezus attacked with a mace and did a whole point of damage.
As the group began to surround Stote from the front, he doubled back to the manor and ran up the wall. Not quite making it all the way up, he glanced around for dormers or windows and found one nearby.
With their foe out of reach, most of Stote’s opponents were forced to use heavy crossbows to try to bring him down, some hit but not enough to un-foot him.
Nadja was getting molested by a beetle in her box. (No not that one, the coffin)
While Nadja was getting her insect fetish fulfilled, we went back to Stote who was getting peppered by javelins which caused us to question the range of these pointed sticks and the advantage or lack of gained by distance. Throughout all of this, Stote took some damage, but managed to hang on.
Atote made the roof and used disguise-self to take on the appearance of a bugbear.
The day broke colder than normal. Ebon awakened to a soggy morning with an even soggier disposition. He immediately questioned Derrek who confirmed the cold was unusual. Derrek didn’t seem overly concerned, certainly not enough to discuss an inconvenient truth.
With his ‘fears’ assuaged , Ebon began to whip up some vittles. Bahgtru seemed to be able to follow the conversation but appeared to draw the most excitement from something in the distance.
As Ebon began to ask Derrek how he could be firmer with Bahgtru, the wolfdog stood up at attention. Just then Ebon caught the sound of children from behind him.
Derreck seemed to think the presence of the children was somewhat expected as they were bound to be curious from seeing the pair in town a few days ago.
Ebon gave the command to ‘follow behind’ and Bahgtru seemed to respond but Ebon got the feeling that this might have been more of Bahgtru’s doing than Ebon’s.
Derrek, completely changing the subject, explained that the ‘Von Kess’ effect was not as ‘always on’ as Ebon might think. However, with time, Ebon would understand when Bahgtru was ready.
Ebon, not wanting to be upstaged, changed the subject to being firmer with Bahgtru. And got some counsel, but then the kids arrived.
Ebon and Derrek made a great show of handling these new ‘intruders’ much to the delight of the children.
Throughout, Bahgtru seemed to be following Ebon’s commands, at least that’s what Erbon thought.
Derrek the Pedophile had plenty of toys for the children and handed them out even though the windowless tent wasn’t available.
The kids played with Bahgtru, once Derrek gave Ebon the nod of approval, until their father’s voice drifted in for the distance calling them home again.
As they departed, Derrek explained that he would continue to work with Ebon until Rite of the Staglass and that, at the end of the festivities, if you kissed the bar at the tavern that Mielikki, goddess of the hunt, might grant a boon.
Derrek then elaborated that one of the noblewoman of the town might play the role of the goddess wearing green and a staghorn crown. I then again provided an excellent lyrical tie in but none of these biatches is deeply familiar with Judas Priest.
Ebon asked if Aquilonia
Back at the boxing gym, Tiras felt his box hoisted (not by his petard) and felt he was in a wagon. He paid careful attention for the sound of birds in cages or old men playing stringed instruments.
Stote, on the roof and in disguise, moved over to the stables and looked down. Seeing only one guard, he decided to stealthily climb down. It seemed as though things were going well. He was able to detect the sound of people performing some activities on most of the sides of the building.
Deciding to find out if fortune really does favor the foolish, Stote ran towards the two bugbears he could see, and called out that he had been attacked by a demon and been stabbed. As he approached the bugbears, Jeezus came riding in from the right and Stote was now in a box.
Back at camp, Ebon continued to tell the tale of the Baconeers with the destruction of Trollskull, the Xanathar, all the shit that went down with Aquilonia and her father, Mirt and the Opera, and fairy logs. The longer the story went, the more gloom came over Derrek.
Once Ebon realized how Derrek was feeling (cuz he’s a metro-barbarian) and asked, Derrek indicated that he had run afoul of the Xanathear. Once Derrek referred to Xanathar as a ‘he’ Ebon asked what that meant and Derrek added that the Xanathar was a beholder that Derrek had challenged in the past. Derrek had lost a lot of people that he cared for to the Xanathar.
Derrek still had friends about and was glad for them to still be safe. He was able to exchange news with them occasionally using animal messengers and other means.
Since the rest of the party was all boxed up, we time traveled forward to the festival of the Staglass. (See 2023-03-25 Staglass Rite)
As Ebon watched the maiden drink from the flagon, she seemed to struggle a bit but eventually finished and got to the trinket at the bottom. It was then off to bathe and drink and toast and Ebon noticed that Derrek took part in these festivities as well.
As Ebon joined him and the festivities continued, Derrek revealed the sculpture he had been working on and Ebon could see in this figurine the likeness of Bahgtru. Derrek turned to the bar and, kissing the rail, whispered something with reverence and then, smiling, turned to Ebon and said “your turn”.
Ebon, holding Derrek’s flute, gave a whispered plea to Meilikki to keep Bahgtru safe and make him a member of the family. He then kissed the rail with reverence. As he did, he felt a female presence advise him to trust those who had been helping him.
Then it was back to the festivities as the townsfolk continued to shower the Staglass with trinkets and gifts. Ebon went over the top and presented the maiden with two vorpal silver earrings which made her light up with her youth and beauty (now that she was bathed) and bow to Ebon in gratitude. Ebon, lacking some of the skills of a Nadja or Tiras, bowed in return but did nothing further.
The boxers continued to travel for 5 days (judging from the passing of night and day) at that point we were transferred up an incline and then ended up on a boat. At some point, we began to hear voices although distant. Then it was off the boat and on to another wagon or cart and then, roughly an hour later, we were dropped onto the ground.
The voices at this point were louder, although it was hard to make out anything other than occasional laughter.
Finally, after all of this, someone took the lid off and we could make out a robed figure casting a spell (3 tries) and paralyzed the group again.
A bugbear untied and unshackled us. We were in a cage with a group of enemies about. The standout in this crown was a mind flayer who looked similar to the one we almost killed in Skullport. He certainly gave Stote the stink eye.
Our travels, even though we didn’t die, left us much worse for the wear.
The bugbear that had been in the cage with us removing our bonds finished his tasks and then promptly slit his throat.
The woman outside the bars said that her husband was dying to meet us and advised that she had left us something to regain our strength. She advised that they would give us time to recover and discover which one of us was not who we said we are. Duh duh duh…
After the festivities, when Ebon and Derrek were back at camp, Derrek advised that he had taught Ebon everything he could. Ebon’s animal handling was much improved although his time with the ranger had left him less intimidating.
Then came the time of choosing. Who would Bahgtru choose? Well, thanks to a setting glitch, Derrek’s +9 whooped Ebon’s plus three but even without it, Derrek would have won. Ebon tried to call Bahgtru but Derrek called him back and won again.
Then began the begging (not like that, Ebon would have you think it was more pleading than begging, but tears were shed and feelings touched and so Derrek came back and presented Ebon with the figurine which he had used his wish with Mielikki to enchant, that could be used to summon Bahgtru, for a short amount of time.
He then said that Ebon should give Bahgtru the command to rest, at which time he would return to his own plain of existence and play among his own kind.
After this was explained, Ebon thanked Meilikki and felt the presence of her upon him.
Derek replied that it was time for them to part ways, but he was always grateful to find others who followed the lady, regardless of the way in which they may choose to follow.
It was just then, as they were about to part, that Bahgtru let out a low growl. Derrek and Ebon both prepared for ….something when
A voice called out to Ebon and Greta (the urchin from Waterdeep), looking a bit older and much better off, advised that his friends had been captured by the Xanathar.
The Harpers believed that this had been done to lure someone out or help them find someone.
Greta went on to advise that she had left the Zhentarim and now worked with 3 Strings and other Harpers.
Those of you who are wondering will recall the Zhentarim are the lesser of two evils. They portray themselves as merchants and somewhat on the up and up.
It is generally agreed that the Xanathar, who are evil without pretense, are far worse.
While the Zhentarim are better, they are still bad.
Ebon introduced ‘his friend’ and Greta replied that she had heard of Derrek. He was indeed quite famous.
Greta went on to reveal that she had left the Zhentarim as she had finally realized how bad they were and that the Harpers had recruited her to be a scout and spy for their group.
Ebon’s question of how Greta had found him was answered by “It was well known to Durnan that you were headed to Amphail ”. This caused some confusion until Greta answered Ebon’s further questions by saying that Mirt had sent her. She was to guide Ebon into the city so he could meet Mirt at the Yawning Portal.
Not wanting to weigh any less, Ebon spent not even an ounce of common sense in agreeing to follow Greta back to Waterdeep.
He bid Derrek and Bahgtru farewell and …..
We’ll find out next week.
2023-04-08 HMMM, is Bill in a bad mood, is that even possible?
We are in a cage with a stone floor that is well crafted with very precise seams. The ceiling and walls were made of bars 2″ thick spaced every 4 inches. with the walls about 20 feet high.
On closer inspection, Nadja was able to determine that this was likely the work of Durgar and that the stone must have been imported from far deeper in the earth.
Knowing that there might be something ‘rigged’ about spell casting, Nadja decided to test things out on Stote but nothing really happened. It was as if Hela wasn’t listening or couldn’t hear her.
The only response was a faint voice from across the way which asked “Hello is someone there?”
Moving forward to the closest point of our 15′ x 25′ cage Nadja was just able to make out a shape in a similar cage 40′ away.
Stote responded to the first inquiry with a “How you doing?”
The voice responded “I reckon I’m doing about as bad as you”.
Nadja asked if he knew where we were and he replied “This is my hell. “
It was kind of warm here. We are in the Xanathar ‘special place’ where there was no one else….except us.
Nadja recognized the voice as Endall BeAl,l the bard from Skullport.
Upon minimal prompting, he told his tale of the Xanathar being upset about his tipping us off in Skullport. He explained they use him as their personal library and regularly probed his mind for secrets and facts. Implanting visions in his mind and taking his eyes (and other things) as part of his torture.
After we were done getting bummed out by Endal, we noticed a bowl of water and some stale bread near Stote and then we started to recall our hunger and thirst.
Tiras decided to search the bugbear corpse and found a letter, addressed to him, that said “Tiras, While I decide whether to keep you alive or not, please enjoy my hospitality. You may wish to break your fast soon, or that decision may not be mine.”
Thinking that he had no other choice, Tiras turned and found only an empty bowl and a somewhat satiated Nadja wiping the last of some moist crumbs away from her mouth.
Stote started to disassemble the bugbear’s hand to get a bone from his finger.
Tiras, noting the dagger with which the bugbear had slit his throat was only a foot beyond the bars and just out of reach, broke the porcelain water bowl and cut open the bugbear’s stomach to take the intestine to pull the key back through the bars.
**While this was happening, Nadja pulled a hood from her head and heard a voice in her mind say “The Xanathar will see you now. Please replace your hood.” Just before she did, she caught a glimpse of Norma Jean. As Nadja commented on her name, the being introduced herself as TH’kokk’tsssz (A very mind flayer sounding name). Nadja decided to comply.
TKZ then led Nadja from this cage to another area and had her hood removed. Nadja was able to make someone out a bit of a distance away, but didn’t recognize the new person, an older male of indeterminate species, however the grell behind him did seem somewhat familiar.
The room was very ornate with 40′ ceilings and many markings of the Xanathar. Nadja also found TKZ had assumed her normal form as a somewhat shorter than average mind flayer. Also in the room was the Xanathar who quickly welcomed Nadja to his home.
Nadja recalled many details of the Xanathar for the stories Ebon and Stote had shared when they learned of him from Rex (or Greta, we’ll find out). Nadja recognized the Xanathar as not only a beholder, but an Eye Tyrant of almost godlike ability.
Xanathar asked if she was the famous Brunewrdaughter and when she replied she was, the Xanathar added “or not”.
They bandied back and forth about Xanathar’s minions having no sense of humor, rings of protection from stuff, the fact that the Xanathar was single and had spent much of his time cleaning out the dungeon which is why we had such trouble finding anything.
The Xanathar then discussed how Nadja, Stote and that group had freed the kept maiden and also that the Xanather had lost his hold on Skullport. When Nadja framed it that way, the Xanathar burst out “NO!, Not lost, taken from me!”. This caused the Durgar in the room to take a step back although the unidentified man did not.
The Xanather apologized for his outburst and went on to explain that ‘Rath’ had been the one to usurp his control and asked if Nadja had ever heard of him
Nadja indicated she had not, but then smarmed THE XANATHAR with compliments.
THE XANATHAR went on to say that Rath had figured out how to align with the magic flaming skulls to keep the Xanathar at bay. These skulls had always been a challenge for THE XANATHER, but a manageable one. Whether or not Rath was truly in control of them, a term THE XANATHAR did not want to use, or simply allied with them.
THE XANATHER answered her inquiry about raising a party with a statement that it would be enough just for Nadja to stay with him as a companion and leveling influence.
THE XANATHER asked if there was anything she might need, a larger room, better accommodations, etc. At this Nadja did notice the Durgar snickering but did not sense any sarcasm.
Nadja thanked THE XANATHER for his time and generous hosting and then got re-hooded and returned to her original room.
Ebom, following along with Greta, rode along on their horses (Yes they both had one) reminisced with Greta about the good old days and the urchin gang and all. During those camp site conversations and roadtrip rambles, he learned:
Mirt was very well known in Waterdeep. He is rumored to be very high ranking in town, perhaps even a member of the hooded lords. He was a business owner among which was the theatre and held a high rank within the Harpers.
Ebon, for his part, regaled her with tales of our adventures. Seems like he’ll tell almost everyone these things.
In a discussion of Aquilonia’s whereabouts he learned only that Greta had heard rumors, but had been instructed to stay quiet about those.
Even though Ebon wheedled and cajoled in his most Ebonesque way, Greta avoided the direct answer by ‘splaining that she had been made to learn languages and discard her ways of the streets.
Ebon reminded her of the fair, no, more than fair treatment she had received from he and Stote and pressed her strongly for the rumors she had heard.
Greta, starting to crack, asked Ebon to promise no to tell as revealing these secrets could cause harm to the one person he cared most about (other than Bahgtru).
Ebon said sincerely there were four (four? please list them here Ebon) people he would never do anything to harm, and that he would do everything he could to protect them.
Apparently, that was enough for a little factoid. Yagra was still alive. Don’t get too excited, she had also been kidnapped by the Xanathar.
Greta reminded Ebon that she had considered Yagra a mother figure but couched that by reminding him she had been one of the original group that had attacked trollskull.
When Ebon expressed some doubt, Greta spun a tale of how she had managed to find a ring with a single wish and that she had used that wish to restore Yagra to life. However, shortly thereafter been captured by the Xanathar.
No amount of trying had been able to convince the Harpers to rescue her as they had made many forays against him and only managed to lose more people.
It wan;’t clear where this lair might be. Skullport seemed the most named location (in, under, near) of the many possible locations of this lair.
Greta couldn’t advise if she were being held with Ebon’s friends or even if there was only a single lair.
Ebon, still seeming confused about time, wondered why Greta hadn’t told him sooner, but figured it out in the end.
Greta still apologized for the shock, and then yammered on about his concerns for his friends and the fact that she was happy (and somewhat naive) that Yagra and his friends were alive, but just captured.
At the end of all this, Ebon advised that she had made the list and it was now up to six. That’s Ebon for you 4+1=6. In return for this new glorious awarding of rank, Ebon reminded her that he should be advised of anything regarding her friends.
Greta revisited the reticence of the Harpers to go against the Xanathar, but with Ebon’s help, they might be convinced.
Back in the cage, Tiras broke his first loop of intestine and Stote realized that the floor was too smooth but the bugbears teeth might suffice.
Stote pondered the next challenge which would be to figure out how to work the makeshift pick in a lock in the 30×30 steel block which seemed to house the locking mechanism.
Eventually Tiras managed to get the dagger, but soon after the lights came on and some creatures appeared. As the lights came on, we felt a wave of weakness pass over us.
Norma Jean, accompanied by six (possibly) human guards. She tossed in three hoods and asked us to put them on. She advised that the alternative was that her guards would put us to sleep. It wouldn’t hurt too much, but the headache after might be an issue.
Stote and Nadja obliged but Tiras decided he wasn’t gonna be anyone’s hoodie bitch and chose option 2. Norma Jean’s mental laughter was met with a mental Fuck You.
6 rounds later, Tiras was finally hit by a dart that put him down.
We all arrived in a large round room and Stote and Nadj were able to remove their hoods.
It was obvious the room was some sort of arena complete with gore and viscera all over the floor. The 40′ high domed ceiling and bleachers around the north walls reinforced this.
On the opposite wall had several spectators on a raised balcony overlooking the battle floor including Norma Jean and what was obviously the Xanathar. There was also a dwarf species with what looked like a crossbow for an arm.
Norma Jean’s mental voice came to the group and said, now you will entertain the lord. Perhaps somewhere in this room are weapons and you may find them and use them to defend yourselves.
As she said this, a large wolf appeared and began to snarl.
Much laughing and joking around later, we joined the combat.
Stote cast his eyes about the room and found a rapier. He quickly moved to retrieve it. He moved in and attacked the wolf doing 15 damage.
Tiraas also spied something glittering in the dirt and moved to retrieve a duh duh duh…short sword a mere 5 feet away. Not wanting to go into battle with just a hand with some skin on it, he snatched up the blade and moved towards the wolf. However, rather than attacking, Tiras chose to disbelieve this illusory wolf. He must have failed his save as the wolf still appeared real.
The wolf then snapped at Stote, but missed.
Nadja, having not stashed her ring of protection in her prison wallet, was obligated to look around for a weapon and likewise found one nearby. Moving over to check it out, she discovered a dagger Not being able to close with the wolf, she gave the dagger a fling and hit the wolf for 6 damage.
Back at the top of the order (making more sense now that it’s baseball season) Stote managed to finish off the wolf.
The crowd booed and hissed but did not respond to Tiras’ taunt to throw down some bandits.
Instead, a bear appeared.
Tiras went over and killed it with 4 attacks. He then turned to the spectators and asked loudly, “What does the barber say?”.
The Xanathar bellowed equally “Next!”.
Nadja and Stote searched for her dagger without much luck.
Will Stote and Nadja find the dagger? What monster will the Xanathar deploy next? Will Ebon be reunited with the re-resurrected Yagra? How long can Tiras bear being stuck in standard adventuring gear? We’ll find out on the next exciting episode of the Comedy Legends!
2023-04-15 – Probing Time – Some Video Needed
In the last episode of the Comedy Legends, most of the party remained captured but let out occasionally for conversation and the entertainment of the Xanathar. Tiraas proved that he’s a hard target when it comes to sleep darts. Ebon was galavanting around with an urchin but instead of learning about Aquilonia, learned that Yagra was alive (Again). When the arena wasn’t as entertaining as they liked, the spectators added deadlier stuff. Confused, you might still be after this episode of the Comedy Legends.
In the last episode of the Comedy Legends, most of the party remained captured but let out occasionally for conversation and the entertainment of the Xanathar. Tiraas proved that he’s a hard target when it comes to sleep darts. Ebon was galavanting around with an urchin but instead of learning about Aquilonia, learned that Yagra was alive (Again). When the arena wasn’t as entertaining as they liked, the spectators added deadlier stuff. Confused, you might still be after this episode of the Comedy Legends
Stote woke up on a table not knowing anything except the bone he had been working on was still tucked behind his era. (Does no one use a prison wallet) He recalled the sound of things pinging against the bars and finally the sound of Tiras body hitting the floor.
He felt the manacles binding him again. He was led out of wherever he was across many surfaces until finally he arrived on a wet surface with something sticky …fuck check the recording…
And back in the arena, it was time for whatever’s next. Bill wasn’t ready, but the trumplican wasn’t either. Instead we saw the bugbear that we had encountered back at the farm/mansion.
Since he seemed a bit surprised, and we were as well, it was a good time to reset initiative.
Nadja attacked with her dagger and did a little bit of damage.
Stote went next and did a bit more
Tiras did 24 more.
The bugbear was thinking he was pretty tough, let’s see if he feels that way on his next attack. This time around he missed twice. He did manage to call out “My lord, did i not please you?”
Tiras told him, he soon would.
The Xanathar replied, “You did enough, you shall have aid”. With that a drunken bandit tumbled into the arena. Rising to his feet, he looked as though the fall itself half killed him. The bandit simply stood there holding his scimitar.
Nadja attacked the bugbear and caused a bit more damage.
The drunk bandit, thinking he would die if he just stood there, moved in behind Nadja to try his luck, but was just a bit outside and so had to spend all of his actions running towards his grave.
Stote (or Stote-ish ), apparently in a teaching mode, decided to share a lesson with the bandit and taught him the error of his ways.
Tiras decided to finish off the bugbear and did so, even though he missed with the pick dice. (Don’t use those again)
The Xanathar said “You have performed admirably. I would like to add you to my ranks”
Tiras replied “See recording”
Nadja held her action waiting to see what would happen.
The Xanathar called out “Nadja, you already said you would help me in Skullport, why is this a challenge?”
As soon as he had finished, Stote attacked Nadja but missed. Before he could move away, Nadja countered with her attack which though a crit, only did a bit of damage.
Tiras moved in front of Nadja and held his attacks for Stote if he returned.
Stote used disguise-self to take on the form of Tiras and charge into the group.
Tiras missed with his held action but hit with his attacks.
Nadja, being confused, attacked the real Tiras, but missed.
Tiras 2 (Stote) attacked Slim Shady and did some significant damage.
Slim Shady attacked the Stote in Tiras clothing, but missed twice.
Recording at about 9 – just after the lines above.
As Waterdeep loomed into view, Greta confided in #Ebon that she had lied ‘a little bit. She wasn’t supposed to come get Ebon, in fact, Mirt had forbidden it. Greta however, had felt that not helping went against the tenets of the guild and so she had come. She continued that the guild often seemed to be moving in different directions and that there needed to be a voice to polarize them. She felt Ebon could be that voice.
Ebon reminded her of the trouble she’d be in once he confronted Mirt. Since Mirt would certainly know how he got there.
Greta knew this would happen, but felt her course was more important. She snuck Ebon in through some unknown passage and they pair quickly arrived at the Yawning Portal.
Mirt, Three Strings, and several others were there. Some seemed familiar to Ebon but others did not.
Durnan seemed too busy to observe the goings on.
Captain Silvermane was there as well. A bit surprising and all of these were huddled in the private room where we had first met Aquilonia.
Ebon, always a good gauge of social propriety, headed to the bar for a Stonepiss. Durnan welcomed him back and asked how things had gone with Bahgtru.
Ebon told Durnan he would never forget what had been done for him. He added that he needed Durnan’s help with ‘this group’ and turned towards the Harper’s. As he did, he caught 3-Strings whispering to Greta that the old man was pretty pissed and she should come speak with him.
Ebon… recording – ….10-ish minutes after the above
Ebon’s passion and eloquence seemed to sway Mirt. He turned to the table and said, “I will not send any of you on this task, but I shall not forestall you either. What say you all to joining Ebon?”.
Great responded quickly as expected.
3 Strings surprised some when he said he too would join.
A soft feminine voice from behind said I will.
Mirt said “Good, one of the Black Staff”
Ebon turned and came face to face with Laraelra Hansard. A woman who was obviously a mage. He asked her name, and it was given. She added “heir to the black staff”. And with a click glance at Mirt, added more: “Yes, I am!”.
Recording again 9:23
Back in the arena:
Nadja attacked un-Tiras with the morning star but my pussywhipped rendition of Juice Newton must have affected her as she did minimal damage even with inspiration.
The T2 then fled to a corner and started climbing up the wall
Tiras glanced around for another weapon, but seeing none, decided to misty step up to the poser. His attempt to grapple first failed and then succeeded. Both he and the fake Tiras fell to the ground. The impact was enough to render the Stote unconscious.
Tiras began a performance, ranting about fame and importance until he had time to kill the braindog affected Stote once and for all. He was very surprised to see the corpse change into the shape changing doppelganger they had encountered early on in the Dungeon of the Mad Mage instead of the satisfying ‘pop’ of a braindog exit.
As the creature died, Tiras and Nadja were surrounded by rainbow light and suddenly found themselves alone in a cell.
Tiras was in the cell just north of the one the party had started in. Directly across from Endall BeAll. The cell he had been in before was cleaned. This cell had a bucket which seemed to be for relief and some small bowl of clear liquid and a plate with some vegetables. Before I could tell Bill that Tiras would not partake of it, Bill moved on to the torture part.
Some wisdom was needed to avoid the attempts to turn the party against Aquilonia.
Throughout the torture, all got the feeling that Aquilonia was in Skullport. Stote and Tiras, perhaps due to their close relationship in the arena, both seemed to think that the Xanathar wanted us to go find her there.
Meanwhile, Ebon was conversing with Larealra and she was saying that her unusual knowledge of the sewers gave her ways to move around. Her equally unusual associations were also helpful One in particular, a dragonkind Filamid…
Ebon broke in to say he knew Filamid who had been an ally in the Trollskull basement battle.
Larealra seemed surprised, but still led Ebon to the seedier parts of town and then, turning into a building, used a sconce to open a hidden passage and bid Ebon enter. As she did, she called ‘bulldog’ into the air. This was rewarded with the response ‘Chelsea’.
Revealed in the room, was Filamid. It was hard to determine if he had aged at all as Ebon was not that familiar with Dragonkind.
As Phil was just getting ready to respond to Ebon’s greeting of “Phil”, Ebon uncharacteristically interrupted, and putting a hand on Phil’s shoulder, simply said “where is she?”.
Sensing that Phil might have some experience with guile, Ebon reinforced the urgency for truth by squeezing Phil’s shoulder.
Phil replied that we might find her on the adventure to find Ebon’s other friends. He knew of the location of a Xanathar lair.
With a final “Shoulder Squeeze of Truth” Ebon broke the embrace and listened as Phil advised that they might make a foray against the Xanathar to get his party. If the party was held at the base Phil knew of, it might be doable. If they were in the Xanathar ‘special place’ it would be more difficult.
Replying to Ebon’s inquiry about the special place, Phil had a plan that involved going to a lair, capturing one of the bosses of the Xanathar group and getting the key to the special place.
Larealra then suggested some attire to help Ebon as they went against the Xanathar. And though Ebon felt he couldn’t possibly need any help, he eventually agreed to wear some special boots as, if nothing else, they would shrink to fit. It was only after they were on that she got to fully explain that they would also help with any noise he might make.
Once they were equipped, they began to move stealthily through the city until suddenly, Filamid pulled him back and reminded him not to arouse the member(ship) of the Xanathar as here, it was large.
Ebon focused on advancing more discreetly and somewhere Stote rejoiced at this new skill.
It was soon time for Larealra to guide them to the sewers where, she explained, an unknown entrance to a Xanathar guild lair.
Since Larealra was concerned for the rightful owners of the entrance property, she asked Ebon if he thought this was ok.
Ebon, reassured by a nod from Greta, advised they would continue.
They then knocked at a nearby door and were greeted by a halfling woman. “Good evening Mrs Peabody”, I hate to disturb you but I need to get into the basement to retrieve some of my fathers tools.
Why do you need so many people to get these tools?
Well, they are also here to inspect and make sure the work was done well.
There could have been more of this curious banter, but as soon as Ebon was close enough to extend his huge hand, Mrs Peabody was departing with the goldpiece that had been palmed therein.
It was down to the basement and to the panel which, once pressed, opened a secret door into the sewers. Ebon was able to catch the location of the panel for future reference. They moved on into the sewers.
Stote, having been tortured for a while, was reasonably sure he was still Stote. He had somehow (prison wallet) managed to keep the bone on him.
He was in a cell that had been his ‘home’ since the arena. He had been moving back and forth for some time, but this time, his jailer, when placing him in his cell, had locked his manacles to the wall as usual but had failed to lock the door due to some distraction.
As Stote was manacled to the wall somewhat loosely (one arm in each chain) he immediately started on the lock on his left arm. Even though the finger pick was somewhat makeshift, he made quick work of the manacle, carefully catching the chain as it fell and setting it soundlessly aside.
Fully prepared for the second chain, he made equally quick work of the second as well.
Glancing about, Stote could discern the pretty standard jail architecture. His 10×15 cell had bars and walls and sech and a large half-ogre, he had heard him called Groz, was in the cell between he and Nadja.
In the cell on his opposite side, was a minotaur he had heard called Limpok who seemed to have suffered a similar fate as the Baconeers.
Stote quickly moved to free Nadja and easily opened her door. He also was able to open her manacles without breaking his bone off in her….manacles.
With them both free, Tiras was fortunate enough that Nadja reminded Stote that he should be freed as well.
and with that…
Will Stote and Nadja find Tiras? Will Ebon fit through the narrow sewer tunnels? Can the Xanathar ever be truly entertained? Will Tiras ever get good clothes again? We’ll find the answers to these, as well as other questions, on the next episode of the Comedy Legends.
2023-04-22 – Foreshadow Much?
Ebon doesn’t seem to be bothered by sewer smell. Bill seems confident that he can manage everyone separated? will Tiras ever get good clothes again (again)
4th Flamerule 1494 DR
The sewers were dank and cold. Condensation dripped icily onto Ebon from cracks in the ceiling almost causing him to cry out in surprise. He quickly became immune to the chilly drizzle.
Soon Laraelra (Larailra) asked for a boost to access a trapdoor in the ceiling. With Ebon’s lift, she made quick work of the lock and disappeared into the room above. Ebon helped everyone else as needed.
Crammed into a small room, Filamid, 3-Strings, LH, Greta, and Ebon could hear sounds of torture nearby. Some talk of Skullport and some crying alerted them to the fact that it wasn’t Tiras. Filamid said it sounded like Flune.
LH cast some spell and an eye appeared within the group and then began manipulating it and spoke to the group. There is a mindflayer in the next room (about 40′) away and a half orc beating a human with red hair. Some discussion confirmed this was Flune.
LH continued that there were others, but they were asleep. She felt we could kill them all if they moved quickly and decisively. The group got ready to surge into the room. Mattrim indicated he might be able to turn Ebon invisible, but he couldn’t do so silently (I guess the bard colleges don’t teach pianissimo).
Then, it was initiative.
The group moved quickly into the room and Ebon, with single minded purpose went at top speed straight for the mind flayer, disregarding an Intellect devourer leapt from the arms of a Mind Flayer who had been fondling it.
Recording 1 hr in
This alerted the mind flayer as well but Ebon, noting the sound it made, leapt over it and went for Nihilor (MF) but missed.
3-strings moved in and cast something, but the mind-flayer saved.
Greta moved in and pointed a hand at the MF and said “Black and Squiggly”. Black tentacles sprang from the ground and began flailing away.
Filamid charged forward in and made quick work of the half-orc.
Laraelra came in and waited for the MF to use a spell she could counter.
Mattrim began viciously mocking him but the MF seemed unaffected.
Greta went all light crossbow on the MF and managed to hit for a bit of damage.
The braindog went after 3-Strings but failed to devour.
Filamid then came down to end the MF and nearly succeeded.
LH continued to await a spell to counter
Nihiloor began to cast a spell and LH was able to counter. MF looked suitably irritated and tried to flee.
Ebon took the opportunity to attack and did a bit of damage.
Filamid likewise took a bite out of crime
3-strings missed
Ebon, leaping over the braindog declared to the MF, “Your little dog can’t save you” and ended his existence. He then turned back to the braindog and issued and trained him not to breathe anymore. He then retrieved the MF body and dragged it back to the room for a quick search.
Stote and Nadja surveyed their surroundings and saw only a door to the east and just as they were about to depart they finally thought to let out their fellow captives. After all, a minotaur and a half ogre can be good allies.
If it weren;t for luck, the bone key might have broken, but Stote’s luck held and the half-ogre was free. The minotaur’s cell was no problem.
Moving to the door in the east, it resisted Stote’s efforts until he applied his bone key which, though breaking with the effort, got them through. Stote collected the pieces for possible mending later.
They arrived back in the arena they had been in earlier. What they couldn’t see from the map was apparent nonetheless. There were several points of egress. Stote asked the newcomers if they had any advice about these pathways and were rewarded with a shrug.
Nadja opted for North and after a quick scan for weapons, they were off.
The passage turned quickly East and topping the stairs, Nadja spotted a suit of armor with the Xanathar crest on the breastplate in an alcove on the right. Being somewhat suspicious, Stote took point and moved past the armor and opened the door.
The hallway extended both East and West with a door to the west about 40′ away. The eastern passage disappeared in the distance.
Stote moved to the west but just before the door found a room to the north. Moving stealthily into it to observe, he found it filled with things floating in the air. These appeared to be ‘Zombie Beholders’ and so he dipped back out to head east.
Tiras, having been tortured for a bit was returned to yet another cell, Tiras found himself in a corner. Guess that means he’s not a baby.
There were many similar cells and several KuaToa guards patrolling the area. The reek of the chamber pot offended him so he attempted to draw a Kuo-Toa to him and spray him with the contents but was unsuccessful.
The occupant of the cell next to him, called out Name. He answered in the affirmative. The prisoner identified herself as Yarga to which Tiras called bullshit. She offered a lockpick as a weak attempt to assuage his concerns. Since there was a guard just in front of ‘Yagra’s’ cell, Tiras tried to goad the guard into attacking. Not being successful, he threatened a long piss, but that just caused him to alert the other guard and then depart.
Searching the MF, Ebon found an orb that appeared to be a likeness of a beholder eye. Handing this to Greta, Ebon was going to continue looking for the key until Greta said “Ebon, you’ve found it!”
3-Strings, searching a chest up above, cried “Eureka” and brought forth two bottles that he expected to be potions of healing.
LH was also pursuing a book that she explained to Ebon seemed to be the Half-Ors spell book.
There was a bunch of drunk yakking about him being a caster, but then I let it pass.
Recording after the above.
Ebon and Laraelra, in the room to the west, had identified the central pillar that appeared as an eye as the possible goal and a way to get closer to Ebon’s friends. Upon questioning, LH seemed a bit unsure if this might work and further that this group could get back if they did manage to find the rest of the party.
LH did say she had a spell prepared that might do the trick unless there were enchantments that might block such a spell.
With some concerns addressed, LH placed the orb into the pillar and Ebon’s party appeared in a new area.
Arriving in a 15×15 room with a pillar in the middle, Ebon’s first concern was for Greta that he could not see (note the pillar). He called out softly and Greta popped her head around the pillar to reassure him.
The group decided to listen for the sound of prisoners. Instead, they heard the sounds of flapping and a fish head appeared.
Immediately calling out in a language Ebon could not understand, the Kua Toa attacked Ebon with his pitcher staff but he missed.
A second came up and caught Ebon in a net, but even though restrained, he missed with the spear.
Stoe’s group, having walked about a mile, found a pile of rubble that looked like it may have been the result of an explosion. They began to try to dig through (cuz what the hell, they’ve got good muscle) . It took a few moments to get the minotaur and Half Ogre on board, but once the minotaur figured it out, the HO was quick to follow.
Back at the big combat, Greta, played now by Sam, gave a psionic blast to the group of Kua Toa and fucked a bunch of em up.
Filamid, now played by Steve H, killed another and then moved across the icor left behind by Greta’s victims to attack another. He was hit for a bit of damage.
LH cast a Magic Missile on one but left him alive.
Tiras degraded the guards for not joining the combat and ‘The Yagra’ joined in but gained no brownie points by speaking in the same language used by the Kua Toa. Even though she seemed to be struggling with it, it didn’t bolster Tiras’ confidence in her origin much.
3 Strings sang a song of a half orc bravery and touched somewhere on Ebon’s backside and filled Ebon with Heroism
Ebon, no longer raging and still caught in the net, decided to use his GWM and cut his way out. Well, now he’s free. Ebon used his next attack on the Kua Toa and did some hefty damage.
The Minotaur and HO continued to dig.
The KT attacked Ebon but found his damage partially absorbed.
The KT by Tiras and Yagra kept a watchful eye and Tiras continued to doubt ‘Yagra’, even though they were calling back threateningly.
One of the Kt used its pincher staff on LH and, while only doing small damage, managed to restrain her.
Greta attacked with a rapier surrounded by green flames but missed.
Filamid took out one of the KT and then moved on to another and killed it as well.
and then…we stopped
Will the party ever get back together? Will Steve and Sam have to play two characters forever? If we can see Aquilonia in the room, how come she hasn’t killed all of our enemies yet? You’ll find the answer to these and other exciting questions on the next exciting episode of the Comedy Legends.
2023-05-13 Aft Shadow much?
The groups are getting closer. Stote is digging further. and dust and death are everywhere. Tiras is confident that good clothes are right around the corner.
During the dig the minotaur dug up a desiccated corpse as they were tunneling through the rubble. It was aXanathar thug (not Zhentarim).
Nadja keeps stuff in her backup cooter.
Seems like Stote and Nadja may be digging futilely. They decided to rest and Stote gave a little healing out.
** R-Tiras was advised that he was moved back to his original cell because he was an MVP (Most Valuable Prisoner) The dwarf that came to fetch Tiras argued for a bit. The heavily armored dwarf with a ring of mind shielding and a Xanathar crest, won the argument and back to somewhere went a hooded Tiras. It took far longer than expected and seemed to either be a very circuitous route or going somewhere else altogether. Tiras was able to sense some magical transport along the way. At one point, Tiras was able to make out the sound of the bells of Waterdeep as well as seagulls. His escort told him “I’ll have no trouble from you. You’re worth too to me”. Just as Tiras was getting his bearings on the cave he must have been led from, voices called out from not too far away “release the prisoner or a dozen Elven arrows will pierce your body” and, with a bit of tripping and recovering between them,. that was just what happened to the body. – Turned out to be Barnibus Blastwind and Saeth Cromley accompanied by the Grey Guard. – They didn’t let Tiras take the ring, but tried to placate him by having Roni show up instead. There was much talk of bathing before he caught sight of Roni who had some of Tiras finery and one of his hats. Turns out, once she had heard he was alive she did the whole hunt for my love thing and managed to connect with someone who, for a fee, could help her locate Tiras for her. T’was a well spent fee since it resulted in them being rejoined as well as all of his gear. The lovebirds were reunited and all was well with the world.
Since Joe was trying to get food, Bill thought it should be his turn. We returned to the combat to the south.
The Kuo-Toa are giving th3e short end of the pincher sticks but the group is quickly reducing their numbers. Watching the numbers go by, it seems like it’s very hard to miss a Kuo-Toa.
Nadja and Stote continued to dig fruitlessly into the rubble, although they did manage to find a few copper pieces. Seeing the futility of their efforts, they moved in the other direction.
Back with Tiras and Yagra, Tiras proved he was not as skilled with broken and improvised lock picks as Stote, but he kept tryin’.
The Kua Toa began some sort of spell that covered folks in red light which should have made the group easier to hit but really didn’t..
With all the Kua Toa dead, the group moved north and discovered ‘Yagra’ and Tiras in their cells. As they arrived, Tiras finally got his cell open. At this point there was a lot of suspicion and, of course, alarms.
Nadja and Stote, headed back the other way, did not find any secret doors but did hear the alarms coming from the west. They headed that way. After a bit of time, they ended up back in the arena.
As the group arrived from the south, Tiras managed to open his cell. This didn’t help much however as Greta and Ebon didn’t buy in to his ruse and Ebon made quick work of the fake Tiras. After that it seemed that Yagra was welcomed with open arms.
Stote, realizing the numbers against him, fled. This left Nadja alone behind him with a very slow movement speed and ready to suffer greatly at the hands of the new wave of bad guys. Nadja however, was able to flee the scene like a cheerleader the morning after prom night and even got a spiritual weapon off as Hela Brightaxe considered her to be a holy symbol unto herself.
Still slow however, she still got a few attacks sent her way although the Hlf-ogre and Minotaur appeared to be taking the brunt of things. As their opponents surged into the room with our party (should i say ‘our’ after they killed Tiras?) Even though it appeared they could have handled this latest influx, Laraelra felt that the odds were against them and so while the group fought off the influx of opponents, she teleported them the hell out of there.
Tiras meanwhile was being debriefed in the comfort of appropriate attire.
See ya’ll next week.
Will Tiras leave with Roni (or leave Roni)? Will the rest of the party get all of their stuff back? Will we ever actually see the mad mage? The answer to these and other exciting questions will be answered in the next exciting episode of…the Comedy Legends.
2023-07-22-CL-From Calamity to Calm (We’re Back)
The party finds themselves in a large clean room with candles strategically placed in such a way that any spell caster would know was significant.
Larealra (La-rail-ra) was quite pleased with their arrival and with Greta, Yagra, and 3-Strings were all there there would have been hugs all around, but Ebon was immediately concerned with where Tiras might be.
There was much discussion about the virtue and value of reusing Tiras but it came to a quick close when Yagra collapsed and Greta had to petition for healing.
It seems like Ebon was just going to be impatient about everything as he moved to give a potion to Yagra while cradling her head in his hands. His opportunities to cradle anything else was impaired by Greta also hovering nearby.
Larealra urged them to move on and as soon as she opened the door to the room, the sound of rushing water was loud in everyone’s ears (hell of a door).
She quickly lit a torch and led everyone out of the room and was going to hasten away when Stote tried to convince Nadja to cast locate object and after some humorous commentary on what constitutes a ‘forked twig’, Nadja was able to cast the spell, she was unable to locate Stote’s Father’s Bow.
Since there was also some fur in the vicinity of the ‘twig’ Nadja tried to locate Tiras as well, but likewise got no result. It was decided that Nadja should keep ‘rubbing her fur’ for the hour allowed by the concentration in the hopes that either she might still find Tiras or that his 6th sense would detect the activity.
This allowed the rest of the group, including Yagra to get ready to move. They left Larealra through another door, this one disguised to look like a natural wall, and followed an underground riverbank on a ledge/path that was about 15′ wide.
Larealra’s rapid pace was a bit too much for the weaker members of the group and so she slowed a bit and explained that this might be a longer journey than she had originally led them to believe.
After some time, the tunnel ended and a large cavern with a waterfall plunged into an underground lake. The cavern was lit by an eerie light produced by some large insects that gave off the blue glow.
Pointing out areas of caution they followed a natural staircase up to a room with a wooden stair. Continuing up, the water is still evident in its flow. The area they went through had been habited but recent damage may give hints as to why it was empty now.
Continuing to progress, the came to another underground lake with a large citadel on an island and what appeared to be a massive pillar rising all the way to the ceiling high above.
Taking small boats across to the island, they were greeted by a tiefling who welcomed them and indicated that ‘she’ was waiting. He then led the group into one of the buildings in the citadel.
Another group was there. A large blond barbarian looking fellow, a monk in homespun, and a masked woman who greeted them.
As soon as she spoke, Ebon headed her way and the large blond interjected himself and slowed Ebon’s approach.
Aquilonia pulled back her hood and said again, welcome and Ebon immediately changed from a charge of doubt to a charge of hugging.
Food was presented including bacon and fairy logs with stonepiss as a chaser.
Aquilonia took point and filled everyone in on Tiras’ rescue and then introduced the two groups.
There was a feasting meet and greet with bacon beer and fairly logs all around. Of note were two of the servers Crumb and Gregory.
Nadja was able to reachout to Tiras and get a confirmation for Ebon that all was well
It wasn’t as long a party as usual as times had been pretty trying for the Baconeers so they moved to a building with accommodations and, speaking of accommodations Nadja had Verson bring up the keg and his manhood for some afterparty action.
Most of the party had challenges sleeping properly and were disturbed by dreams and visions of the recent tortures. Stote was particularly bothered and after a particularly bad bout, he went wandering and found Zuul who offered liquid and some moral support as well.
The morning brought a wake and bac(on) and the group felt that it was pretty late in the date.
Many of the supporting cast had left. Larealra and 3 Strings had left and Greta was out meeting with Kel-Al.
Breakfast turned serious as Aquilonia advised that everyone would be needed to trap and hold the Xanathar.
Aquilonia also explained the meaning of her message in that the ‘Wolf’ was her fatherand he was protecting Stote’s family. She had aslo hoped we knew to keep silent and hoped that we would come underground which would have let us meet up sooner.
Well, that didn’t work, but here we are together again.
Back where the world is right, Roni gently woke Tiras to let him know that the air to the black staff was waiting and he should go down to meet her when convenient.
When he got down he met ‘Elra’, Larealra Harsard. After a quick check on the whereabouts of the rest of the group, Larealra also provided some additional background on Ebon’s concern due to the shapeshifter and fake Tiras.
After a bit of haggling we decided that we should go to a private room.
Back in Underdeep, Aquilonia and Ebon had a heart to heart about why Aquilonia had left and, of course, it was all Stote’s fault. However, she got better and was ready to put up with Stote again. Then there was warning and weeping and other kewl roll playing stuff.
After the heart 2 heart, Aquilonia (having dried her eyes) gave the Baconee (no, not quite complete) a whirlwind tour of underdeep including the new alert system for Xanathar detection.
Back at Skull Island, Tiras and Roni arrived with those pieces of gear they could put together. Ebon, now with Bahgtru, put the lock on Tiras and the squeeze fest began. While this uncomfortably long embrace was occurring, Roni gave out the gear and got to know everyone a bit better.
Having been hugged enough and confirmed by Bahgtru, Tiras broke the clinch with Ebon and watched as Ebon wiped a piece of dust from his eye.
Roni then went on a shop tour with Aquilonia with the possible intent of setting up a Riataur’s Weaponry franchise in Underdeep.
At that point, we ended with discussions of how the party will form up for kicking the shit out of the Xanathar.
And we ended it there.
2023-08-12 I’m back – complete notes!
After a recap of last week. Something about Ettin’s and Mushrooms, and Mosses, oh my.
Jibber-Jabber is being possessed by the same being that once spoke to us through the Kua-Toa and was displeased.
Initiative had been rolled and off we went. Trying not to hurt JJ too much and hopefully bring him back to his senses.
A flurry of minor attacks and some calls to ‘fight it’ and reminders of spices seemed to shake JJ out of his situation.
JJ seemed to immediately calm down but looked a bit underfed.
We decided to regroup and rest at JJ’s place and learned that the slime had been growing since we had passed through before. It appeared to be the ‘big fishy’ and the running water that was the source of the slime.
While JJ seemed enamored of the idea that he might return with us to UnderDeep (Skullport) but Tiras suggested that perhaps JJ might be happier if we removed the source of the slime and returned his neighborhood to it’s original ‘Mr Rogers’ status.
While we were resting, Stote heard something ‘clicky’ sounding come out of the water to the South. He cast spike growth to the south and awakened Tiras.
Turned out to be a group of hook horrors coming up from the South.
The remainder of the evening was a hook horror breakfast special as we waked, staked, and baked them all to death.
Ebon continued to rage and might have attacked a friendly but Nadja was able to calm him down.
After some ‘splaining, Ebon seemed ok.
We’ll see if anyone kills anyone else next week. And maybe we’ll go kill big fishy-man.
2023-08-19 Both groups at twice
Well, we’re all back in underdeep (but as the other group). Not sure how we got here, but we start out with a brief recap of Underdeep politics.
A kid named Midge, who also has the hots for Kel Al and might consider Bob to be his competition) comes running in and tries to engage us to handle a ‘big noise’ out there, but we decide to drink while Bob sweeps the floor.
Back to the ‘regular group’, we are making our way back to Skullport. The way is suspiciously clear as is the barrier that Stote smacks up against as he makes his way down the hall.
After a bit of probing and digging we were surprised from the rear by a group of Drow. I should have guessed this from the initiative role.
They shot Tiras in the back cuz they’re cowardly backstabbers.
As soon as Tiras alerted the rest of the group, JibberJabber charged through the group to engage. Nadja blessed everyone and off we went.
Through the stabbing and faerie fire and the testicles we fought. At first it appeared as if all might be lost.
There were clouds of death and dancing lights and Tiras almost died, many times. But the Legends won the day and stayed alive, just as the misfits deigned to arrive.
2023-09-09 – Both groups at once
So we join both parties at the drow battle. We’re a bit unsure of what everyone’s status is so we had to go back to the video.
Tiras got to be standing, We got a recap of cloudkill and then it was finally Verson’s turn.
Tiras sucked up some gas and would have died but was saved by a math correction. He then healed folks, healed himself, and fled the crowd.
Stote also got to be standing and also saved and took out one drow and then shot the mage enough to knock down the cloud kill.
The drow biatch left and Ebon made short work of the remainder (I guess that’s how HO-Barbs do long division)
Since Wrath wanted to put all the heads on pikes, Nadja raised a drow zombie to nail the heads to the wall with Drow hand crossbow bolts.
During the looting we found many things, literally. Ebon found a deck and in accordance with WWED he did draw a card but only one.
Ebon got the knight (Mige), Bob got a bunch of gems, Verson got the vizier (one question once)
After divvying up the loot we decided to take JibberJabber with us and Nadja cast gentle repose so we could keep our resurrection options open.
Stote suggested we find that half-drow he was banging to which Bobg said he knew a good place (wink wink, nudge nudge) and Mizran agreed (real winking here – 27 Perception.
We got there and Stote was very Laissez faire about the relationship as Cal ‘AL’s greeting was somewhat less than warm.
Drinks were on Bob though cuz he was happy to play sugar daddy to Cal Al with the gems he had won from the deck.
Once Wrath got back to her keep, one of her servants informed her that they had had a visit from a representative of the Xanathar guild and that person had requested a meeting with Wrath. The servants had turned him away, but they felt he might be hanging about by the ‘outpost’ which was the southern river entrance.
We long-rested and then met with Aquilonia/Wrath in the morning for breakfast and news.
Crumb and Gregory are Wrath’s servants. (Remember them from earlier?) {Wrecking up Skullport – 02/05/22 – 05/28/22 – 9c}
Filamid disturbed Aquilonia to let her know that a messenger from the LOWD and , after summoning security, Filamid led her to the waiting room where the messenger (wishing to remain anonymous) informed AQ that the LWOD had requested an audience with her and that if she did not attend, there might be dire consequences.
Once Aquilonia accepted, we zoom back to the Guts and Garters – aka Maddies place, the Baconeers and Misfits were rudely awakened (from various states of passed out nudity) by Maddie yelling about a guest needing them asap.
When they were awakened (Can’t say roused with this group) and for some, bathed and dressed, they headed to the keep where Aquilonia filled them in on both options: Xanathar and LOWD
After some discussion it will be the misfits meeting with the Xanathar whenever, and the Baconeers will go to the LOWD meeting.
After additional discussions the decision was……
for the next session – maybe Joe can show up?
But AQ did promise Ebon to look into JibberJabber and dialed up the priestess. She also sent all to the tailor for some new togs.
2023-09-16 Let’s make a deal!!!
Monty Hall: I’m looking for the first group with minimal social skills..
We began with Aquilonia buttering up the DM (Possibly literally).
Wrath will go with the misfits to the LOWD together with Cerulean May (The healer that helped with the flaming skulls)
The Baconeers, together with Mizran as Wrath will go to meet with the Xanathar
While we were sorting out who would be sheriff, I noticed someone’s head in Bill’s lap and it wasn’t Brandi. But it was decided that Zuul would appoint Midge who would work with the three skulls to keep order in Zuul’s absence. What can happen in a day.
While the Baconeers head off to meet the Xanathar, the Misfits take Wrath’s credit chit to a seamstress on the third level.
Winding back pretty much the way they got in, turning up stairs and heading toward a crane assembly where they could see a group waiting.
Mizran sent his bat familiar ahead with prepared notes to be delivered in the appropriate situation.
Turns out that the representative was Jarlaxyl who we had met before. He had come to offer peace with the Xanathar. They would relinquish all claim to Skullport in exchange for the cessation of all attacks on Xanathar operations elsewhere.
Ebon took some umbrage to this and, after a few words and raised voices, graples and threats were exchanged and, just when the wicket seemed the stickiest, Miz-Wrath commanded both (not literally) to stand down. They did and Jariaxyl somewhat apologized.
The negotiations moved forward to the display of gifts from the group, but broke down there.
No amount of logical arguing would dissuade either side so, after Ebon got to be best friends with Jarlaxyl, Miz-wrath decided to accept the deal and took the key and then had Jarlaxl get his lackey’s to open the chest.
Turns out it was all of Stote and Nadja’s shit.
With the Baconeers right as rain, we returned and advised the actual Wrath of the deal made.
The Misfits were back from getting measured and waiting for delivery of their wonderful new clothes.
Since things had been pretty quiet up to this point (combat wise) the Baconeers – AQ went out to find stuff to kill.
Back in the hobgoblin tunnels, the group found some carrion crawlers where they had killed the Otyugh previously. They made quick work of them both.
We heard something coming from the south making a shh-boom, shhhh-boom sound. Turns out it was a carrion ogre who did not survive our held actions.
We then had a bunch of calendar discussions about future sessions here’s a summary:
Sam is out next week (9/23) – play
Lawrenz is out the next week (9/30) – Play
Steve H, B&B are all out 10/7 – no game
Steve H is out 11/4 – Play
Steve H is out 11/11 and we could play but we won’t cuz bill has VD
More is out there but you’ll have to play to find out
2023-09-23 Let’s go ‘Shroomin’
The notes were read in, in fantastic style, and we gave Sam an extra nudge regarding leveling up Nadja.
Tiras still needs to find some mushrooms to fix an illness that has arisen from his connection to the spellplague which gives him his spellscar.
Using Locate Object, Nadja was able to get an erection of the mushrooms but, of course, they were down. We recall that once we find the mushrooms, we’ll need to make the tea and drink it right away to get the effect. However, the passage Aquilonia had read did not confirm how long the positive effects might last.
We made our way down to the mushroom room where we had once killed piercers and found some mushrooms, and we found the room slimed out.
There was a troglodyte there pointing at us and issuing an eerie scream (think Donald Sutherland from invasion of the body snatchers). Tiras dispatched it quickly with an arrow.
Stote headed off to find out the ‘what’s what’ and heard the sound of running feet coming from several directions.
We prepped for combat and then watched our foes grind themselves to dust on Stote’s spike growth. Anyone who even thought about getting through would feel the wrath of our held attacks.
That plan was going really well until the drow that survived all that gave a pod people call and spoiled the surprise.
We hung around for a bit to see if we could get any idiots, but that didn’t happen so Stote dropped the spikes and we moved forward. Seems like that was just what they were waiting for as then everybody surged in from the south.
That was a mistake as we wiped them out in fine style.
Just when we might have thought we were all set (except for Ebon who had gone so far he might be clueless) they started pouring in from the north.
Looks like noone ever told them how the Paris pincer movement is supposed to work, so they became the next pile of corpses.
We then digressed into discussions about disney and their woke attitudes affecting film performance.
Oh yeah, one of the creatures said to Stote, I will continue
Gr8 session Bill.
2023-10-14 – Blindsight Nazi
Steve H, read the title as…No Effect for you!
We started out in a room full of blood and death. It wasn’t frightening though, as we created it.
After some hemming and hawing, we sent Stote out to scout. To the SW was the river and to the SE was a variety of options, so that’s the way we went.
After turning north, we heard a woman’s voice, but couldn’t make out anything specific. Stote scouted ahead.
We moved forward and ended up meeting Darribeth Meltimer, a female ‘wizard’ who had been talking to a toad in her lap.
WAIT – Stote does get an effect!!!
We greeted her and found out that she wanted to be reunited with Urgalla, the dark eyed love of her life who she had left in the town of Amfail 10 years ago when she joined an adventuring party into the dungeon.
We tried to have a ‘sane’ conversation with her but she was a nut job that allows toads to convince her that we’re demons, and so she fled.
Ebon went after her but didn’t have to run far as Nadja locked her up with a hold person spell.
Ebon began carrying her back, holding her both as nicely and securely as possible.
In all the hub-bub we lost track of the toad and sent Stote to look for it in case it was important to Darribeth.
Stote found something where the toad was expected to be, but it was definitely not a toad. As soon as he tried to placate the thing, it fled.
Tiras thought it must have been an Imp. Deceiving her and feeding her insane and a prisoner of her own mind.
Nadja pulled out all the stops and cast her one 5th level spell, Greater Restoration. It appeared the spell was successful and so Nadja dropped the hold person and all was well with the crazy mage.
Derribeth explained that she had been part of a party led by Mergala as they had needed a mage. Things were going well until their leader got killed by a hook horror at which point things quickly spiraled towards the negative.
We offered help, she offered a reward (but didn’t have much) and we settled on getting her back to Underdeep for Wrath/Aquilonia and the misfits to get her topside. Since they weren’t there we introduced her to Maddie and Kel-Al and set her on her path back to Urgala with the promise to stop by and see them when we can.
And then Sam went to the bathroom and we lost 20 minutes to rock-n-roll discussions.
Back at the dungeon our first attempt to move forward met a dead end. Instead of heading the other way, Nadja gave Ebon a pickaxe and let him try to do like the Doors and break on through to the other side. He did not. After he threw in the towel we headed on south and east again.
We came to a room where we had found mushrooms in the past, but the room was wasted by whatever blight had come to affect this region.
Further south, we came back to a room full of the corpses of enemies we had killed on our first visit which was months/years ago. The skeletal remains seem to reinforce the years angle.
We continued on, some crossing the chasm, some of us going the long way but all of us arriving at a place where we could forge ahead into virgin territory.
Hearing some woman chanting off to the east (yeah, the place is full of chanting women). As Ebon ‘stealthed forward, he was quickly seen by the new group which turned out to be Irky Timbers, Ashwynde Callerionde, and a mysterious woman who we had met back in Oakhurst but never met in Waterdeep as agreed. Also with this new group was Travonigal Temperventhus who had fought against the red wizards of Thay.
After getting aquainted/re-aquainted we moved immediately into the making of the tea from the Tongue of Madness mushrooms. Based on the recipe from Aquilonia which called for the mushrooms to be fresh.
After some discussion about untrustworthy gnomes, Irky got the fire up and the group got the tea going and as it was steeping Ebon and Nadja were affected by the fumes and could only tell the bluntest truths.
After much blowing, the tea was cool enough to drink. Tiras drank it down and was affected by the same severe honesty issues as Nadja and Ebon, only a bit worse.
Just as we were about to head after the big fishy man, Bill called it a night.
See ya’ll next week.
2023-10-21 – Fuck U Big Fishyman
We better get to it tonight!!!
Ashwynde indicated that she thought the creature we were seeking would be in that general direction, and so off we went.
Travonagil Arrow Catcher led the way as we looped around to the South and recalled that Ashwynde was a bit of a bitch if you happened to need to make a living off the forests and its denizens.
Nadja kept bumping into Stote cuz no one could see him.
As we rounded a corner Travonagil almost slipped in the thickening slime. There were also several rotting corpses which added their stench to the earthy smell of the slime.
So began our first adventure of sliding through the slime filled room. We made it quite a way before Irky went down. He came up gasping for air and grasping for boobs (Nadja’s).
The rest of us kept moving slowly forward. Here’s who else fell in that order: Stote slipped, but caught himself on Ebon; However, since he was off balance he let go of Ebon and got pushed off balance and he fell instead. WOW, that’s pretty good, cuz we’re out.
As soon as we cleared the slime room, we ran into the ‘slimer’ who tried to parley, but Tiras was having none of it.
We rolled initiative and Stote won (of course) and fired the first shot. As soon as the arrow hit the creature, it disappeared.
Ashwynde seemed to think that was a sign of weakness and urged us forward. She cast water breathing on the group and off we went.
It didn’t take long to find the ‘real’ villain, a delicious looking catfish with his crab/lobster friends.
Stote, up front, attacked first and the rest of us followed suit. Notable items were:
Bill had to manage a ton of entities (as usual) but not thinking this was hard enough, he ran the NPCs as well. Ashwynde became a giant octopus, Travonagil used a bunch of Magic Missiles. Stote climbed the walls. Ebon got controlled. Tiras had a shutout round. Nadja remained nervous about being in the water. Irky’s best move was healing. Just as we thought it was red lobster time, more enemies showed up.
We won the day and ended up on the central island where a stone Otyugh was possibly worshiped as a god by the local denizens. Yep, Nadja confirmed. There was a boot, Amulet, pipe, and brass ring that were all magical.
The pipe was a show pipe that allowed the user to blow various smokey monster shapes. The amulet seems linked to the golem we had found on the first level.
We also noticed an area to the south where a stairway rose out of the water. There we found more treasure and a couple pussywhipped Kua Toa.
After a bit of record keeping, we got our experience, our schedule, and no real clue of what we do next..
Maybe we’ll find out next week.
2023-10-28 One last hurrah
After a fine meal of claws and tails we headed back to underdeep where we instantly changed over to our Misfit personas.
Back at the keep, Gregory came in followed shortly thereafter by Vespa, the 1st liason of the Lady Laeral Silverhand, chosen of Mystra. He took a moment to check out the group and seemed a bit of a poof, but other than that he addressed Aquilonia properly as the Lady Wrath.
He advised that he had a letter that the Lady Wrath should read in private, to which Mizran shot a thought to the group ‘Naked Pictures’ to which Verson thought back – “I like naked pictures’. Bob just blurted out Naked Pictures.
Bill then read in the letter which he will text to me later.
As Aquilonia was reading, the Misfits were having a fine time at the Bar in The Keep. When she had finished the letter, Aquilonia sent Gregory to fetch Vespa to the foyer. When that failed, she came in person for Verson (ok for all of us, but that don’t rhyme. Anyhoo, Gregory got chastised, we got chastised, in short, it was a very chaste group that headed off to the meeting with the Lords of Waterdeep.
When it was time to depart, Vesper produced a staff and spoke the word Silverstream, and opened a portal to somewhere. Instead of landing in Toriel, we arrived in an area where the skies were gray and the trees were wild and oddly shaped. Verson was able to devine that we were in the feywild. Vesper quickly pointed out that this was just a pathway to the meeting and was needed to maintain security. The trip was a bit unnerving as the group kept hearing footsteps running through the leaves nearby.
While Verson thought to investigate, Mizran mentally counseled against this. However, it quickly became clear that Bill wanted us to engage in some way as suddenly, it was initiative time.
A group of Quicklings and Meenlocks who had been following us at a short distance decided to attack. They were accompanied by some darklings that I wasn’t supposed to see, but I could.
They did some minor damage on the first pass and also (mostly) avoided Aquilonia’s fireball.
We continued hacking away with Mizran hasting, Verson and Zuul chopping, Bob rolling 1s and then turning his frown upside down. Aquilonia proving she’s a one trick pony and just folowing fireball after fireball. Mizran was enamored of this philosophy and cast one of his own.
The end result was total ass whoopin’ although the last victim escaped by the blessing of Tymora, he was the sole survivor.
After a whole bunch of prestidigitation spells (Thanx Mizran) we were all cleaned up and ready to party, Vesper was able to finally get Siri out of his ass and got us moving in the right direction.
When we arrived, the general discussion at the amphitheater ceased and all eyes were on….us.
Mizran thought to Bob, “your dick must be hanging out”.
A figure in red with a trumpet on his sash, took the dais and used the Steve Lawrenz cantrip to announce “Stand ready to receive the Ladt Laeral Silverhand chosen of Mystra” with much pomp.
We noticed that most of the groups were sporting both masks as well as armed escorts. We took Aqulionia’s lead and followed her to her position. and then joined in to some random humming to welcome Laeral, the Open Lord of Waterdeep.
Aquilonia was able to detect Mirt in the crowd and gave him a now to which Mizran thought her that she might be more subtle in her acknowledgements.
Laeral went on to introduce the Lady Wrath and give a bit of a background on Underdeep and the potential for an alliance and a joining into the LOWD. She suggested that the group welcome her and the potential this new addition to the city of Watewrdeep might offer.
Then the memvbership drive kicked off and the pitched began to attend meetings, volunteer time,etc.
Just as they were reaching an agreement on the joining of Underdeep, Halaster appeared in a tremendous burst of fire. Several stupid, dtupid archers were ignorant enough to fire when Halaster made his appearance and the were frozen in place, their arrows having also fallen ineffectively in a mystical mist.
The conversation then focused on Halaster’s superiority, reallowing the Xanather, adding Grey Guard for the protection of Underdeep.
Halaster, complaining that he had something floating around in his head but he had the gist of things, then offered a contract of commision to the “Lady Aquilonia”for the city of Underdeep etcetera, etcetera, which she briefly revirewed and quickly signed, for better or worse. As soon as she signed, Halaster announced, “You Fell For It” and with some laughter, departed.
As soon as he left, the Lady Laeral quickly concluded the meeting and all were in agreement that we should depart. Vesper was all set to lead us back but the Lady Laeral had to get a qucik smotchy message to Aquilonia along with a ring and a possible promise of intimacy when she uses it to return.
While all of this was happenin’ Stote was tryin’ to reconnect with Kel-Al. She was cordial but distant as she was hookin’ up with Bob. However, while Stote was trying to get convicted of coitus interruptus, Narl – a drow from the Xanathar prison showed up and asked for a private conversation.
Stote alerted Kel-Al that he couldn’t be with her and that she should alert all that, if he disappeared, this was the MF to kill.
Stepping into the alley, Narl informed him that he had worked with the lord wrath and knew some of the misfits. He also advised that he knew how to get into the Xanather lair, and was an engineer and knew the secrets of the smoke powder.
Narl went on to describe his engagement with the Xanathar as more of a slave than anything else and he wanted someone to eliminate the Xanathar in exchange for Narl’s freedom.
Stote demurred in favor of someone who could better understand the plots and machinations of nefarious characters, but alerted Narl to the fact that if he wanted direct action, Stote was his guy. He added that he could introduce Narl to the group(s) who might be better suited to make such a decision. He invited Narl to ‘A Beacon in the Darkness’ (Maddie’s Place) at a future time and then went back in to try to get busy with Kel-Al. Even after he had told her he couldn’t be with her this evening.
Well, we know he’s not getting laid for at least a month…..
Until December then.